Brett Trainor Unplugged

Brett Trainor

Brett Trainor Unplugged is for Gen Xers who want to get one step closer to living the life they want—on their terms. After six years of building life beyond the default corporate playbook, thousands of conversations with Gen Xers, entrepreneurs, and experts, and features in Fortune, Fast Company, Forbes, Harvard Business Review, and Inc., Brett Trainor is still on the quest to build his ideal life—and he shares what he learns along the way. Part personal journal, part practical guide, and part curious conversation, this is a candid, lightly produced show about stripping away the noise, rejecting unnecessary grind, and seeing more of what is possible. Brett is a deconstructor, explorer, dot connector, and self-admitted high-functioning lazy person. Through solo episodes and unfiltered conversations with Gen Xers, founders, creators, and experts, he explores the decisions, habits, tools, tradeoffs, and ideas that can help you build a life you actually want to live. The conversations span the areas that make life worth living: money, mind and body, purpose, connections, possibility, and fun. There is no singular path. No hustle theater. No permission required. Just better questions, useful ideas, and real examples that help you see what is possible—and ask: Why not me?

  1. 1d ago

    Jim Barke: His First 2 Years Going Solo, Unfiltered & Honest

    Almost every escapee story on this show starts with corporate going bad. This one doesn't. Jim Barke spent nearly twelve years at a company he genuinely liked, with what he calls the best team he's ever worked with, and six weeks of PTO. Nobody pushed him out. He wasn't burned out. He hired a career coach because he knew he was at a crossroad, and on their second or third meeting she told him he should quit his job. He laughed at her. He was divorced, single income, with his oldest headed to college. Then he came back to the next meeting and said he was going to do it. What flipped it happened on a walk. He was spinning on how am I going to make money, and realized money isn't actually his top value. Being a present dad is. Being a decent neighbor is. What he wanted was the ability to say yes. And he has the receipts. When a local father went missing and the community put out a call to search, he moved his one meeting and went. During a local emergency he spent about forty hours delivering groceries in a month. Two years in, this is the most useful kind of guest, because he still remembers the numbers. He set written goals before he left. Three months to momentum. Six months to a first client. Twelve months to sustainability, which he's careful to say does not mean replacing his corporate income. It means seeing a path. His first client came from announcing on LinkedIn that he'd left. A guy he used to train for triathlons with had just become chief legal officer at a nonprofit and had a project. His best client over two years came from an email somebody in the Collective sent him about Catalant, a marketplace for consulting work with private equity backed companies. He bid, won it in three days, did good work, and ended up flown to San Francisco to present to the PE firm's leadership. His words: that one email changed the trajectory of my business. He's also honest about the parts that are hard. The loneliness of a basement office after a team he loved. Three kids in college. Income that moves up and down. And the two hundred thousand dollar question nobody in this space answers well: how do you build enough trust in a networking group to actually refer someone's work when you've never seen their work? He doesn't know. He says so. And when I asked whether he'd ever go back to corporate, he didn't give me the usual answer. He said maybe. Under specific conditions. But that he'd be running away rather than running toward, and he doesn't like that feeling. In this episode: Why strategy alone doesn't sell in the mid market, and what AI changedLeaving a job he liked, with six weeks of PTO on the tableThe career coach who told him to quitThe walk where money stopped being the pointTwo months from decision to exit, with no client lined upThe three written goals he set before he leftHow the first client actually came inCatalant, and the email that changed everythingThe loneliness nobody warns you about, and his fix for itWhy a ten o'clock email feels different nowThe $150,000 in commissions he turned downThe trust problem in networking that nobody has solvedWhether he'd go back, and the conditions THE SCOREBOARD Jim wrote these down before he left. This is the most transferable thing in the episode. Month 3 — Momentum. Not revenue. Conversations, calls, referrals, people responding. The test is whether you're moving or staring at a blank screen. Month 6 — First client. He set it that far out on purpose so it wasn't a pipe dream. His came faster, but he says waiting six months would have been brutal, and he planned for brutal. Month 12 — Sustainability. Note what this does not mean. It is not replacing your corporate income. It's seeing that people buy what you sell and that there's a path. Year 2 — The one Brett adds. You stop wondering whether you have to go back. Not because you couldn't, but because you've seen enough cycles that the swings don't rattle you. HOW THE CLIENTS ACTUALLY CAME IN Announced on LinkedIn that he'd left. A former triathlon training partner, newly a chief legal officer at a large nonprofit, reached out with a project. Flat bid, project based. That one relationship has produced several engagements since, and kept producing after the guy moved on.An email from somebody in the Collective pointing him at Catalant, a marketplace for consultants working with private equity backed companies. He found a fit at a hundred million dollar PE owned healthcare company, bid, and won it in three days. Worth noting he says three days is not typical. He has proposals that have been open for three months.That client compounding. The CFO turned out to be a partner at the PE firm, flew him to San Francisco to present to their leadership, and has been his best account for two years. When work slows down he emails them that he has bandwidth and asks what they've got. TIMESTAMPS 00:01 — Welcome, and the different kind of escapee story00:42 — Who Jim is and what sourcing and procurement actually means01:23 — Getting out of bad contracts, and why relationships are the product02:30 — Mid market wants strategy and execution, not just strategy03:13 — How he uses AI on contracts, and where twenty years of judgment comes in04:19 — Two years out almost to the day04:26 — Brett on the two year mark05:02 — Twelve years at one company, and why that was unusual for him05:30 — Six weeks of PTO, and leaving anyway05:50 — The career coach who told him to quit06:10 — Divorced, single income, oldest headed to college07:07 — The walk, and the moment money stopped being the driver07:40 — The search for a missing father, and what saying yes looks like08:20 — Forty hours delivering groceries during a local emergency09:15 — Two months from decision to exit09:30 — Why he couldn't build anything before he left09:44 — Brett on finding your first dollar outside corporate10:43 — What he actually sells, and why he still sells it11:00 — The part nobody tells you: you get to dream12:00 — The first week, and the Ron Burgundy glass case of emotion12:22 — Two years later the swings are monthly, not daily13:27 — The honest part: three kids in college14:10 — Loneliness, and the team he misses14:50 — Out of the basement once a week15:02 — Brett on not telling anyone he'd gone solo15:40 — The circle of ten, and why Brett started with five17:07 — Corporate isn't the enemy, it's the trade-off17:55 — Answering email at ten at night and why it feels different19:43 — Clients only send you the high value stuff20:17 — Six hours of Zoom you were invited to21:35 — The walk as work time, and getting over the guilt22:00 — What he thinks of expensive consultants now that he is one23:18 — The 20 to 30 percent rule24:29 — The ninety pound coworker25:00 — Executives who block time to think25:44 — Walking notes, voice memos, and the folder of things you can't decipher later26:56 — Podcasts and silence, fifty fifty27:18 — Rediscovering the joy of learning28:25 — The three written goals29:30 — The first client, and the triathlon connection30:22 — The Collective email, and Catalant31:19 — San Francisco, and the client that's carried two years32:18 — Why the second and third clients are the hard ones33:28 — The trust problem in networking34:48 — How Brett handles a referral when he doesn't know the work36:12 — From chasing six figure deals to the four to six week roadmap project37:27 — His dad, two jobs, seven days a week, and what it taught him38:35 — The commissions he's turned down, and the 25% offer39:33 — Where that revenue stream is legitimate for other people40:54 — Would you go back to corporate?41:07 — The conditions, and why it would be running away44:26 — The nurse line, and 30% of calls that didn't need a nurse47:09 — Where to find Jim

  2. 2d ago

    You Don't Need to Replace Your Salary. You Need to Fund Your Life- Here’s How

    Join the Escapee Collective: A Free Community for Gen X Most people stay stuck in corporate because they think there are only two options: find another job, or start a business that eats five years of your life before it pays you. There's a lot of room between those. This one is about how you actually make money after corporate, and the first thing to get straight is what you're aiming at. Replacing your salary and funding your life are two different targets. One is a number somebody else set for you. The other is the number you need, plus the life you want, with a dial you control. I go through the three stories that keep people from ever starting: Entrepreneurship sounds as bad as corporate. True for the traditional version. Not true for solo done right, which is fewer hours, no employees, and a lot less complexity. I don't have the skills. You already ran a solo business. It had one client, you went through a five-round sales process to land it, and you traded a lot of hours for the contract. We called it a job. I can't sell. Selling is problem solving. When I ran sales ops, I studied our best reps across every segment to find the common trait. It was simple. The customer believed that person understood their problem and could fix it. That's it. Then the five paths: gig work, starting a traditional business, buying a business, buying a franchise, and building a solo business. I spend most of the time on the last one, because that's where I see escapees actually winning. Inside solo there are two roads. Monetize what corporate taught you, which is consulting, fractional and advisory work, and makes a good cornerstone. Or build low friction, high margin income streams, which is the part most people have never considered. Nine real examples in here, including the guy who makes three hundred thousand a month negotiating car deals, the guy who gets paid to turn business owners' unused credit card points into trips, and the woman charging eight hundred dollars to organize a garage in a couple of hours. Stack three or four of those and you're at ten thousand a month on a handful of hours a week. In this episode: Funding your life versus replacing your incomeThe three stories that keep people in corporateWhy your corporate job was already a solo business with one clientWhat I learned studying our best salespeople across every segmentThe five paths, and who each one is actually forWhy buying a business is the most underrated option right nowThe two roads inside going soloNine low friction, high margin examplesMust solve versus nice to solveThe only four things anybody pays for THE NINE EXAMPLES, ORGANIZED They come out of the episode in sequence. Here they are grouped, so a listener can find the one that fits. Things that use something you already know UGC for brands. Record short videos for brands that want Gen X and boomer faces. Around $500 for a couple of hours. People are doing $10K a month once a brand keeps re-upping.Credit card points optimization. Small business owners run everything through one Amex or Chase card and sit on piles of points they never use. Learn the redemption game, plan the trip, charge about a thousand dollars.Car purchase negotiation. A decade inside a dealership finance office turned into a flat $1,000 fee per deal, three hundred deals a month. Things any competent adult can do well Websites for local businesses. In my town of about forty thousand, I found forty one local non-franchise businesses. Half had no website at all.Google Business Profile cleanup. Fill out the profile, build a process for responding to every review, and ask for new ones. Reviews matter more now that AI is reading them.Garage cleaning and organizing. $800 to $1,000, a couple of hours. People will happily pay not to do it themselves. Things that are arbitrage or access Marketplace arbitrage. One guy buys VCRs cheap on Facebook Marketplace and sells them at a premium on eBay. Not for me. Real money for him.Government subcontracting. Primes are encouraged to subcontract and don't have time to go find capable small businesses. Be the connector.ADA website advisory. Accessibility is a live legal risk for businesses with public-facing sites. See the note at the bottom before you build an offer here. THE TWO FILTERS Is it a need to solve problem? Must solve and need to solve close. Nice to solve drags. If it's something the owner would like done but isn't a priority, you'll work twice as hard for the same fee. Does it do one of four things? Everything anybody pays for comes down to: Save them timeSave them moneyMake them moneyReduce their risk Hit a need to solve problem that checks two or three of those and you can start generating income fast. You don't need a website. You need conversations. TIMESTAMPS 00:01 — Why income is the thing that keeps people stuck00:40 — Two million Americans between 45 and 64, and what most of them are doing about it01:30 — The 83% only looking for another corporate job02:00 — The entrepreneur stereotype, and why it's half right02:50 — Hundreds of ways to make money, and why experience expands your options03:20 — Funding your life versus replacing your income04:00 — Cash flow thinking instead of paycheck thinking04:42 — It's hard work either way. The difference is who keeps the upside.05:30 — 17 ways and counting, and why that's not a flex06:50 — Story one: entrepreneurship sounds as bad as corporate07:30 — Story two: I don't have the skills. Your job was a solo business with one client.08:40 — You can go solo without burning the boats09:00 — Story three: I can't sell09:20 — What the best reps in every segment had in common10:20 — The Microsoft story11:40 — The five paths11:50 — Path one: gig work12:50 — Path two: start a traditional business13:20 — Path three: buy a business, and why it's underrated14:01 — Path four: buy a franchise15:00 — Path five: build a solo business15:40 — Road one: monetize what corporate taught you16:16 — Why small businesses need foundational help, not level three work17:20 — Road two: low friction, high margin18:00 — Why the $5K engagement beat chasing six figures19:00 — UGC20:00 — The credit card points guy21:00 — Tommy, and $300K a month negotiating car deals22:20 — Websites in a town of forty thousand23:16 — Google profiles, reviews, and ADA24:20 — VCR arbitrage24:50 — Garages at $300 to $400 an hour25:00 — Government subcontracting25:24 — Stack three or four and you're at 10K a month26:00 — High functioning lazy26:40 — Must solve versus nice to solve27:00 — The only four things people pay for27:39 — You don't need a website. You need conversations.28:30 — Why this isn't like a job interview29:00 — The AI episode coming next29:30 — Close LINKS Got something working? Drop a note, and if it's replicable let's get you on the show. bt@bretttrainor.com

  3. Oct 7

    Hana Kim: I Left 3 Months Before My Pension Vested

    Hana Kim did almost everything you're not supposed to do. She spent seventeen years in corporate, all of it in insurance, and made VP. Then she took a bigger VP role that required moving her whole family from Southern California to Arizona during the pandemic. House to sell, house to buy, a dog, and her mom, who lives with them. She landed in mid-June when it was a hundred and fifteen degrees. The job was great, until it wasn't. She describes the feeling the way a lot of us would recognize. Not burnout exactly. More like wearing a suit that kinda fits. Day by day you notice the fit is off, and then one day you have to take it off or lose your mind. She joined the Escapee Collective in October of 2024, gave herself until the end of 2025 to decide, gave notice in July, and walked out in December. Two or three months before her pension vested. On paper, a terrible decision. She'll tell you she had no choice. Then she made it harder. Insurance is a small world, and the easy path out is referrals and consulting gigs inside the industry you came from. She left the industry too. Which meant starting over with about three hundred LinkedIn connections, more than half of them in a business she was never going back to. What she says about that period is the part I keep thinking about. Being excellent in corporate doesn't mean you know how to talk about your work. Her reputation was built inside the walls of one office and one industry, and none of it came with her. The back half is her actual craft, and it's good. Her idea of building a neighborhood instead of an audience is the best framing I've heard on LinkedIn, and I'm stealing it. Not finding your ICP and bombarding them. Building a street where some people hire you, some people refer you, and some people are just people you talk to. ABOUT THE GUEST Hana Kim is a personal brand strategist who works with solopreneurs and founders. Before going solo in December 2025, she spent seventeen years in B2B marketing in the insurance industry, finishing as a VP. She started out as a freelance writer and editor, went to law school, and practiced as an attorney before moving into corporate. She is intentionally a solo operator and has no plans to build an agency. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hanakim/ She also has no content pillars, on purpose, and she'll explain why. In this episode: Seventeen years in one industry, and the VP job that required moving statesWhy she doesn't call it burnoutFalling out of favor, and how it's never one big thingThe pension she walked away fromInterviewing for a C-suite role and realizing she didn't want itWhy the SVP math stopped making senseLeaving the industry, not just the jobRebuilding a network from three hundred connections, most of them deadThe post that went semi-viral and brought the first clientYear zero, and the seven or eight offers nobody remembersBuilding a neighborhood instead of chasing an ICPWhy she has no content pillarsDeciding what you don't want to be known forThe rented land problem, and why she's planning her exit from social THE NEIGHBORHOOD, ASSEMBLED Hana's core idea, pulled into one place. The wrong model: find your ICP, connect with your ICP, bombard your ICP with information until they like you enough to hire you. The right model: a neighborhood. Not everyone on your street is a customer. Some are people you chat with. Some will refer you to the person who needs what you do. The value of the street isn't that everybody on it buys from you. What that changes in practice: You talk to people who will never hire you, on purpose.You stop optimizing every post for conversion.You control what you can control, which is how you show up, because the algorithm is not yours.You decide what you want people to say about you when you're not in the room, and then you stay on brand even in the throwaway posts.You pick what you don't want to be known for, and you walk away from content that works but points the wrong direction. And the one that takes the pressure off: nobody remembers your early offers, and nobody remembers your failed ones. Hana tested seven or eight in her first year and can't recall what was in most of them. TIMESTAMPS Taken from the raw transcript. Shift for cold open and sting. 00:01 — Welcome00:46 — English degree, law school, attorney, caregiving break, seventeen years in corporate01:40 — Joined the Escapee Collective in October 2024, and the deadline she set herself02:56 — Why she wouldn't call it burnout03:00 — The VP opportunity, and what it cost03:30 — Uprooting the family to Arizona during the pandemic04:30 — Sunday scaries, and thinking everyone had them05:09 — Landing in mid-June at a hundred and fifteen degrees05:20 — Finding Brett on LinkedIn, and "corporate gave up on you"05:40 — Falling out of favor, and how it's never one big thing06:00 — The process of elimination: the job, the company, or the work itself06:45 — The pension she left on the table06:56 — Brett on purgatory and the Geoff Curtis episode08:18 — A suit that kinda fits09:02 — A long notice period, and leaving before next year's projects09:30 — Walking away from the industry, not just the company10:00 — Turning fifty. "Too old. Maybe tired is the word."11:36 — Caregiving and what corporate flexibility actually means13:16 — Interviewing for a C-suite job and not wanting it13:53 — The SVP math: a lot more responsibility for a little more money14:40 — Six months of experiments15:00 — Being excellent in corporate doesn't mean you can talk about your work15:22 — A reputation built inside one office16:00 — Three hundred connections, and starting LinkedIn over16:46 — Build quietly, or build somewhere your peers won't look18:57 — The post that went semi-viral20:16 — The first contract and the first inbound client21:00 — Brett on what happened when he got polished21:47 — Solo on purpose, and saying no to an agency22:30 — Sustainable, and where your energy goes24:00 — Not building a light version of your corporate career24:30 — Year zero24:54 — When AI told her the target audience was "marketers who want revenue"26:00 — High functioning lazy, and the world-class lollygagger26:48 — There is no one path27:48 — The neighborhood28:34 — ICP bombardment versus actual neighbors29:19 — LinkedIn's identity crisis29:56 — Control what you can control30:14 — Why she has no content pillars30:24 — The content that worked, and why she dropped it31:08 — Hana asking Brett if he was walking away from the Escapee brand31:31 — Brett on how AI quietly boxed him in32:19 — Nobody remembers your failed offers33:18 — Building in public, intentionally33:51 — Deciding what not to be known for35:42 — Brett on optimizing the next thirty years37:05 — Separate the money from the mission37:36 — Get offline. Chamber of commerce. Actual neighbors.39:20 — The rented land problem39:30 — Why she's investing in her own site40:03 — Locked out of LinkedIn, with no way back in40:30 — The guy who walked into office parks and left with three engagements41:28 — Business owners don't care about your label, they care about the problem42:08 — Where to find Hana LINKS: Questions or guest ideas? bt@bretttrainor.com

  4. Sep 30

    Janet Tanguay: Spitballs, Sweater Vests, & 4 Days in Banking

    Join my Substack: https://bretttrainor.substack.com/ Episode Overview: Janet Tanguay got spitballed by her own colleagues in a corporate training for going off script. She lasted four days in her next job. Now she helps people build the life they actually want, and she has the most practical approach to it I've come across. Janet Tanguay is a serial entrepreneur who has run a record label and an art business, and now runs Hammock Way of Life, helping people and companies get clear on what they actually want through vision boarding. She's the author of Hammock Way of Life: Leaping Toward Joy, part memoir and part business book, available in print and audio. GUEST LINKS https://www.linkedin.com/in/jazzyjan/ https://hammockwayoflife.com/ In this episode: The spitball training, and the ten years she stayed anywayFour days in banking and the sweater vest that ended itThe boss who told her at a book signing that she almost made him quitWhy the questions stop after enough years insideFinding the work by accident at a chamber of commerceThe five whys, and why the fifth one is the real answerThree values as the filter for everything you say no toHow to actually build a board, and the words to keep off itWhat she does with people who have four ideas at onceVision boarding inside companies, and what it turns up THE METHOD, ASSEMBLED Janet laid this out across the whole conversation. Here it is in one place. 1. Run the five whys. Start with one question. "Why do I want to leave?" Answer it, then ask why again, five times. The fifth answer is usually the real one. 2. Pick three values. Start with a list of ten, cut to five, then three. These become your North Star. When something lands in front of you, you check it against the three, and that's how you say no to things that look good but aren't yours. 3. Build the board around one center. Put the single most important thing in the middle. Cluster everything else around it. If you scatter it, your dreams come out scattered. 4. Get specific. Numbers, timelines, how many people, how much money. "I want to be rich" isn't a goal, it's a mood. 5. Watch your words. Nothing with a double meaning. Janet's examples: "nailed it," "crushed it," "a family affair." These things manifest in ways you didn't intend. She put a Buddha in the center of a board because she wanted more yoga and more stillness, and ended up sent to China to the largest Buddha temple in the country. 6. If you have four ideas, make four boards. Then talk through each one out loud with somebody. The one where your eyes light up is the one. Janet says it happens every time. 7. Take the free step. Not the big step. The free one. Go to the open house. Test drive the car. Send one email. She almost didn't test drive a car because she assumed she couldn't afford it, then drove it off the lot. 8. For a business, use the business model canvas as the board. Revenue streams, resources, partners, value proposition. Same exercise, different frame. Questions or guest ideas? bt@bretttrainor.com TIMESTAMPS Estimated from the transcript. Spot-check and shift for cold open and sting. 00:00 — Welcome, and where the company name came from01:35 — The spitball training02:33 — Ten years in anyway, then done03:11 — Four days in banking03:29 — Day two: all the ways you could be killed on the job03:46 — The sweater vest, in the parking lot, at ninety nine degrees04:33 — The old boss who showed up at her book signing04:50 — The four column form nobody could explain05:30 — What happens when you stop asking why06:36 — No plan, and what came next06:48 — The chamber of commerce, and finding the work by accident07:47 — Why lenders squash dreams, and why she wanted a room where they couldn't08:11 — Your life experience qualifies you for more than you think08:46 — The ski instructor is only a few lessons ahead09:26 — Getting past the fear of judgment11:14 — Breaking the rut while you're still in it12:05 — The book, and what's in it15:47 — The five whys16:00 — Three values, and how to get to them16:30 — Using the three to say no18:00 — Asking other people how they see you19:25 — Clearing the old stuff out19:54 — Cutting the negative people, and how easy it turned out to be20:55 — The gossip in the office, and the woman who ended it with one sentence22:34 — Asking for a sign, and the fish sign23:50 — Why she asked for eagles25:35 — How to actually build a board26:43 — Numbers, timelines, and specificity27:00 — The words to keep off your board27:40 — The Buddha, and the trip to China28:00 — Using the business model canvas for a company29:30 — Brett's half marathon, and day eleven of 75 Hard30:20 — It isn't about thinking anymore. It's about feeling.30:45 — "That's coming to me now"31:31 — What does joy actually feel like32:29 — Small steps that break the pattern33:27 — Connecting dots across 370 conversations34:07 — Why AI won't connect those dots for you35:22 — Take the free step. The open house. The test drive.36:53 — Four ideas, four boards, and watching which one lights you up38:25 — What happens when you run this inside a company • • 40:49 — Where to find Janet

  5. Sep 26

    Ten Years of Planning. Then He Quit in a Day

    Join Brett’s Substack: Letters from an Escapee: :https://bretttrainor.substack.com/ Hans Weygoldt had everything on paper. Good money, job security, the family business, the life that looks right from the outside. And he was empty. He spent ten years trying to leave. Every time he sat down to build the plan, his mind went blank. As he puts it, the more he thought about it, the more self-doubt showed up, so the planning itself was digging the hole deeper. When he finally went, it took about a second. Something changed at work, he said that's it, and gave notice with no plan B at all. He didn't even tell his wife until days later, halfway to Maine on a camping trip. She was shocked, then she smiled. His only regret is that he waited so long. Getting to that point went through some hard ground. A decade of substance abuse while managing in the corporate world, driven by a void he couldn't name. A trip to Peru that broke the addiction but left the guilt behind. And eventually breathwork, which is now what he does for other people. Two ideas in here I haven't been able to put down. The first is his split on pressure. External pressure eventually crushes you. Pressure you build from the inside is something you can expand through. He spent a career trying to meet expectations other people set for him. Now he sets them himself, and sets them higher than anyone else ever did. The second is from a mentor of his, and it's the best thing said in this episode: it takes a lot of curiosity to find out who you are, and then a lot of courage to be that way. This one pairs with the Geoff Curtis conversation from earlier this week more than I expected. Two guys, completely different paths, both landing on the same thing: the planning is usually the avoidance. In this episode: Golden handcuffs, and the beliefs underneath themThe decade of substance abuse nobody at work knew aboutPeru, and what broke the patternWhat actually happens in a breathwork sessionWhy the planning kept him stuck for ten yearsExternal expectations versus the ones you set yourselfTrust as a practice, not a feelingWhy he never told his wife until after he'd quitSkydiving, piano, and a master's degree at this stage of life ABOUT THE GUEST Hans Weygoldt is a breathwork facilitator and emergence coach. He spent years in a family business before leaving with no plan, and now works with people on breaking the patterns underneath addiction, emotional suppression, and self-sabotage. He runs in-person group sessions and one-on-one sessions online, and is pursuing a master's in consciousness-based leadership and coaching. LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hans-andreas-weygoldt-151777356/Facebook: Hans Weygoldt THE IDEAS WORTH KEEPING The plan B was the trap. Ten years of trying to engineer an exit produced nothing but more self-doubt. He left without one and figured it out after. External pressure crushes, internal pressure expands. The same force, two completely different outcomes depending on who's applying it. Trying to be strong made him weak. The mask cost more than it protected. Trust is the first principle. In a session and out of it. He says breathwork reflects life, and learning to trust the process on a mat taught him to trust it everywhere else. Curiosity first, then courage. Finding out who you are is the curious part. Being that person in public is the hard part. What you think of me is none of my business. Not original to him, but it's the line that got him on camera after a lifetime of avoiding it. TIMESTAMPS Estimated from the transcript. Spot-check and shift for cold open and sting. 00:00 — Welcome, and how Hans describes what he does now02:07 — The family business, the money, and the empty feeling03:34 — Golden handcuffs, and the beliefs formed in childhood05:28 — Peru, and how he found breathwork06:13 — First session in 2018, out of the job a year later06:59 — Questioning everything he believed about himself08:41 — Awareness as an ongoing practice, not a destination10:44 — The decade of substance abuse while managing in corporate11:09 — The void he was trying to fill12:46 — The first session: "I cannot keep this up any longer"13:20 — An hour gone, and no inner dialogue14:42 — What actually happens in a session16:28 — The physiology, in his words17:04 — In person versus online, and which suits who19:40 — Why Gen X never invests in itself20:09 — How many sessions, and why integration matters more21:34 — Fear of judgment, failure, and criticism22:02 — "You'd never have seen me on a podcast"23:11 — External expectations versus internal ones23:40 — External pressure crushes. Internal pressure expands.24:05 — First generation college and the path that gets installed26:16 — The mask, and how trying to be strong made him weak27:47 — Ten years of trying to quit28:30 — Why the plan B was making it worse29:00 — Trust as the first principle of breathwork31:03 — The relief after, and his only regret31:40 — Telling his wife on the road to Maine32:20 — The year he spent with his kids34:42 — Skydiving, piano, and going back for a master's37:37 — Boredom, curiosity, and what lit the fire38:00 — Curiosity to find out who you are, courage to be that way38:23 — Approaching a session with childlike curiosity40:00 — It's the most fulfilling work he's done, and it's hard41:30 — Where to find Hans LINKS Connect with Hans — LinkedIn or Facebook, both under Hans Weygoldt Mentioned: The Ultimate Journey: The Mystery of Life and Death by Stanislav Grof, and Grof's work on holotropic breathwork Get the letters — Letters from a Corporate Escapee:https://bretttrainor.substack.com/ The Escapee Collective: https://theescapeecollective.com/ Questions or guest ideas? bt@bretttrainor.com HASHTAGS / KEYWORDS breathwork, emergence coaching, golden handcuffs, leaving corporate, patterns, emotional suppression, self sabotage, GenX transition, personal development, holotropic breathwork, consciousness

  6. Sep 24

    Geoff Curtis: You're Not Burned Out, You're in Purgatory

    I've had north of a hundred authors on this show. This one stuck with me differently, and it's because of one word: Purgatory. Geoff Curtis spent nearly thirty years building a career in healthcare communications. Title, expertise, platform, the whole thing. Then the company was acquired, his role went redundant, and all of it disappeared at once. What followed wasn't a reinvention arc. It was the discovery that he'd spent his adult life using work to avoid feeling anything. He picked purgatory on purpose. As he puts it, words like transition imply progress, and he wasn't making any. The other choice that makes this book different: most people write about this from the far side, after they've figured it out. Geoff is writing from inside it. Three years out and still working through it. There's no five step plan in here, and some readers are frustrated by that. I think it's the reason the book works. The idea I keep coming back to is his separation of three things we tend to mash together. Livelihood, identity, and self-worth. Livelihood puts food on the table. That's all it has to be. The trouble starts when livelihood quietly becomes identity, and identity becomes self-worth. Then losing the job isn't a financial event, it's an existential one. We also got into something that isn't in the book. Four weeks before we talked, Geoff did the Hoffman Process. Eight days, completely unplugged, thirty nine strangers, fifteen hours of prep work and days running 7:15 in the morning to 9:30 at night, all aimed at understanding which of your behavior patterns you inherited from your parents. He says he wishes he'd written the book afterward. Fair warning, this one is heavier than most. Depression, grief, his father's death, and a lot of honesty about patterns neither of us is done with. In this episode: Why he chose purgatory over transitionLivelihood versus identity versus self-worthThirty years of running on external validationRunning as emotional suppression, and how to tell it from progressNew metrics for happiness, and why the old ones keep coming backInvesting in yourself, therapy, and the Hoffman ProcessWhy people doubt themselves inside corporate, not just outside itThe imposter syndrome nobody on his team ever mentioned to each otherEverything is a choice, and why we only price the downside ABOUT THE GUEST Geoff Curtis spent nearly thirty years in healthcare communications before an acquisition made his role redundant. He's the author of Embracing Your Own Purgatory, written from inside the transition rather than after it, and he now runs a nonprofit he built with his wife that works with college students. LINKS The book: Embracing Your Own Purgatory — Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and anywhere books are sold Author site: https://geoffreycurtis.com/) LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/geoffreycurtis/ THE IDEAS WORTH KEEPING Livelihood is not identity is not self-worth. Three things, and we let them fuse. "Livelihood puts food on the table. If you don't make the livelihood the identity, then you're good." Transition implies progress. Purgatory doesn't. That's why he picked the harder word. Running versus progressing. Both are fine, but you have to evaluate the ending. Why did you leave? Bored, burned out, actually moving toward something? Skip that and you rinse and repeat for thirty years. Closer to right than quick. The nonprofit took two and a half years instead of the five months his old metrics demanded. That gap is where the real work happened. Realism as a Trojan horse. Geoff's admission that he uses "I'm a realist" to smuggle in negativity is the sharpest self-observation in the episode. You're not your patterns. The Hoffman framing: you absorb your parents' patterns as a kid to stay close to them, rebel against them as a teenager, then repeat them under stress for the rest of your life until somebody shows you where they came from. The conversation nobody has. Geoff and a former direct report both had imposter syndrome the whole time and never said a word. "I always thought you had it together, and I wanted to make sure you thought I had it together." TIMESTAMPS Estimated from the transcript. Spot-check and shift for cold open and sting. 00:00 — Why this book landed differently01:31 — Why he chose the word purgatory02:46 — Not brave enough to say we're unfinished02:51 — Brett: I think I was in purgatory while still employed03:53 — His wife knew it was going to hit him before he did05:08 — Identity, self-worth, and what work was really providing05:49 — Thirty years of running on external validation06:48 — Why there's no path out in the book, only questions08:30 — Livelihood is not identity is not self-worth09:35 — Separate the money from the mission10:49 — The college senior who wants success and fun12:36 — First generation college, and the expectations that come with it13:49 — Running when things get uncomfortable14:25 — Evaluate the ending, or you'll repeat it15:45 — Running as emotional suppression, and his father16:35 — Love the process and eventually the process loves you17:30 — Three years out, and building new metrics for happiness18:57 — The old metrics never fully stop flashing back20:00 — Brett talked his way back into a full time job because it was comfortable21:18 — Geoff turns it around: how much was external pressure?22:58 — What changes when you finally become value driven24:20 — Following energy as a compass25:17 — Why the nonprofit took two and a half years, and why that was right26:52 — First dollar out versus being methodical29:41 — Why you'd be a better leader now than you were then30:25 — Gen X and the refusal to invest in ourselves31:25 — The Hoffman Process, eight days unplugged33:06 — The patterns you inherited and repeat under stress35:44 — Getting comfortable being uncomfortable36:58 — Doing the uncomfortable thing, and how the podcast started37:41 — The nonprofit as his uncomfortable thing40:17 — People are doubting themselves inside corporate now41:50 — The imposter syndrome nobody admitted to each other43:00 — Everything is a choice, and we only price the downside44:15 — Negativity as an inherited pattern46:15 — The quarterly business review Brett runs with his wife48:11 — Why most of the book's feedback is coming from men QUOTES "Words like transition mean progress. In purgatory, there's a lot less progress." — Geoff "We're too focused on being finished, and not brave enough to say that we're unfinished." — Geoff "Livelihood puts food on the table. If you don't make the livelihood the identity, then you're good." — Geoff "We're tying how we feel to what somebody else thinks about us. That's an interesting psychological juxtaposition when you sit down to think about it." — Geoff "Things don't need to be quick anymore. They need to be closer to right than quick." — Geoff "I use my realism to mask my negativity. It's almost a Trojan horse." — Geoff "He said, I always thought you had it together, and I wanted to make sure that you thought I had it together." — Geoff, on imposter syndrome with a former direct report "I convinced them to hire me full time. In hindsight it made no sense. But it was comfortable." — Brett "You're not being let go because you don't have the skills. Drop you into any situation and you know more than ninety five percent of the people in the room." — Brett Questions or guest ideas

  7. Sep 22

    Megan Collier: You Don't Need Followers to Get Paid (UGC)

    Megan Collier's first appearance is still one of my most downloaded episodes, so she's back. Quick version if you missed it. UGC is user generated content. Brands pay you to make short videos, and instead of posting them yourself, they use the footage in their own ads. No followers required. No production setup. Megan's been doing it four years and has taught more than 16,000 Gen X and Boomers how to do it, including her mom. Her origin story is the part I keep thinking about. She was on a call trying to sell a footwear brand on hiring her, mentioned her mom in passing, and the brand got noticeably more excited about her mom than about her. Nobody that age was doing this. So she went and built the thing that didn't exist. I keep coming back to UGC because I've been hunting low friction, high value income, and this one lands at the top of the list every single time. You're not applying for a job. You're not competing against five hundred other applicants. You already own the equipment. We got into the money, and Megan gives real numbers instead of vague ones. What a beginner should charge. What the performance-based deals actually pay and why she turns them down. What her students are making, from a few hundred a month up to one who cleared twenty-two thousand last month. Also worth your time: brands are now writing "no AI content" directly into their creative briefs. Megan's read is that the flood of AI has made real human video more valuable, not less. Her phrase for the moment is a trust recession, and it's the most useful thing said in the whole episode. In this episode: What UGC actually is, and why followers don't matterThe brand call that accidentally started her businessWhy brands are banning AI content in their briefsWhat to charge when you're brand newPerformance-based deals and why she passes on themWhat her students actually earn, at every levelWhere the Amazon Influencer program fits, and where it doesn'tWhy she quit TikTok ShopLocal businesses, and trading content for servicesHow to find the right person at a brand HOW TO ACTUALLY START, ASSEMBLED Megan walked through this across the conversation. Here it is in order. Go look at UGC videos on TikTok or Instagram so you know what you're making. It isn't for everyone and it's better to find that out in ten minutes than ten weeks.Make three or four videos using products already in your house. Megan's first two were cat treats. Basic editing. Nothing fancy.Put them in a portfolio. Canva works. Any simple site works. Brands need proof you can make content, same as any other business.Pick a lane to get hired. Either join the creator platforms, or pitch brands directly. Megan pitches.Start local or start small. Local service businesses, gyms, spas, a fencing company. Many have real marketing budgets and have never worked with a creator. Gifted or traded work counts here.To reach a bigger brand, DM their customer service account and ask who handles content partnerships. They want a quick answer they can check off, and they'll usually give you the name.Treat pitching as volume. Megan's rule of thumb is that roughly one in fifty says yes, and a no often just means not right now.Then chase repeat clients. That's where the margin is, because you stop relearning a new brand every time. TIMESTAMPS Estimated from the transcript. Spot-check and shift for cold open and sting. 00:00 — Why Megan's back01:10 — What UGC is, and the 16,000 students02:13 — Why Brett keeps coming back to low friction income03:13 — Why so many people freeze before they start04:24 — She saw it on TikTok while working a corporate job05:00 — Out of that job in fourteen months05:32 — The footwear call where they got excited about her mom06:33 — Nobody that age was doing this07:01 — Why corporate trained us to overthink it08:37 — Who am I to teach this, and why two steps ahead is enough09:26 — A detour into other low friction businesses10:18 — What AI is doing to this market10:37 — Brands writing "no AI content" into the brief11:55 — The trust recession12:32 — Is it too late to start?13:10 — Why it's an ongoing need and not a trend14:18 — What to charge when you're brand new15:00 — Performance based deals, and the math on them16:42 — Why Megan turns those down17:11 — Brett butchering a brand name on camera, and the brand not caring18:24 — The part-timers, and what a summer looks like19:00 — Replacing corporate income19:45 — The student who made $22,000 last month20:48 — Why repeat clients change the economics21:52 — Where the Amazon Influencer program fits23:29 — Income stacking and double dipping24:45 — Why she quit TikTok Shop27:11 — How to start, step one28:39 — Cat treats, and your first videos29:30 — Platforms versus pitching30:27 — Big brands versus local businesses32:00 — Why local wins give you momentum33:13 — What the first fifty dollars does to your head33:20 — Trading content for services34:38 — How to find the right contact at a brand35:30 — Pitching as a volume game36:41 — Getting a fence stained in exchange for content38:30 — The fears that stop people, and why none of them hold40:03 — Belief, action, and the first dollar41:09 — Where to find Megan QUOTES "I happened to mention my mom, and they got way more excited about my mom than me." — Megan "We're all in a trust recession. We don't know what's real and we don't know what's fake. So the more real and raw, the better." — Megan "Brands are literally writing no AI content into the brief. I've seen it several times just in the past couple of weeks." — Megan "She's in her fifties, functional medicine, lab coat. She made twenty-two thousand dollars last month." — Megan "A brand paid me fifty bucks. I'm now a content creator. That carries through everything else." — Megan "It's a volume game. For every fifty that say no, one's probably going to say yes." — Megan "We're not saving lives here. This is not brain surgery. Don't take it so seriously." — Megan "You probably spend a lot of time on social media consuming content, when you could be creating it and getting paid." — Megan "You're not applying for a job. You're not competing against five hundred other people." — Brett LINKS Megan Collier TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube: @megan_ugc Instagram DM is the best place for a specific question. Megan's UGC course — https://stan.store/affiliates/bd030aba-a9a1-4f50-9073-45cc67b073f1 Mentioned in the episode Creator platforms Megan named: Insense, Billo, Cohley, and others. Confirm exact spellings with Megan before publishing, the audio is unclear on a couple. Email lookup: hunter.io AI pitching service she mentioned: confirm the name with Megan. Questions or episode ideas? bt@bretttrainor.com UGC, user generated content, side income, GenX side hustle, content creation, brand deals, making money outside corporate, no followers needed, creator economy, low friction income

  8. Sep 16

    Shelley McIntyre: Who Are You Without the Title?

    Shelley McIntyre is back on the show, and her first appearance is still one of the most downloaded episodes I've done. She was a grief counselor before she was a coach, which is why she talks about layoffs differently than anyone else I know. We opened on the Oracle news, because the math on it is ugly. Twenty years in, fifty or sixty hour weeks, and what shows up is an automated email at 6 a.m. that doesn't say thank you. Her point stuck with me: you spend a career radiating loyalty outward, and at the very end, when it matters most, you don't get any of it back. Then we get into the trap almost nobody sees coming. You leave, you go independent, and because you're wired for comfort and you just absorbed six losses at once, you rebuild the exact role you escaped. Director of sales, but fractional. Same work, same frustrations, now with no benefits. As Shelley put it, you built the same box you just got out of, and you can't figure out how you ended up back inside it. I did a version of this myself. I had a good contract gig that paid well doing work I liked. Instead of building on it, I talked the company into hiring me full time, because the title felt safer. I was miserable within months. The back half is her method for getting unstuck, and it's the opposite of what most people do. You don't sit down and list your skills. You don't mine your performance reviews. When you've just been laid off, you are the least qualified person in your own life to describe how good you are, because you're operating from doubt. So you go gather evidence instead. In this episode: Why the coldness of a modern layoff lands harder than people admitIdentity, job titles, and the shorthand you loseThe comfort trap, and why rebuilding the old job is a normal human response, not a failureThe physical toll nobody talks aboutWhy performance reviews are useless for thisHow to ask people who know you what you're like at your bestTurning what comes back into five words, and using them as a filterThe portfolio approach when one opportunity only delivers part of what you needThe guilt of not being busy, and why you were never productive nine hours a day anyway THE EXERCISE, ASSEMBLEDWe covered this across the conversation but never laid it out in one piece. Here it is. Pick five to ten people who know you well and who you genuinely trust. Mix of personal and professional. The trust part matters more than the title.Ask one question: "Can you describe what I'm like when I'm operating at my best?"Let them go long. Most people won't give you adjectives, they'll tell you a story about a specific time you showed up. Those stories are the useful part.Read all of it together. If you find yourself doubting it, notice what that means. You'd be calling people who love you liars.Synthesize it down to five words that describe how you show up at your best.Use the five as a filter. For any opportunity, job or client or project, ask whether it not only allows but requires you to show up that way. If it only hits three, go find the other two somewhere else in your life. ABOUT THE GUESTShelley McIntyre is a coach for Gen X professionals in transition, and a former grief counselor, which is where a lot of her perspective on identity loss comes from. She hosts Burn the Map, a podcast built around short episodes, and works with clients on figuring out who they are outside a job title. Podcast: Burn the MapSite: https://burnthemapcoaching.comLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shelley-mcintyre/ TIMESTAMPSEstimated from the transcript. Spot-check and shift for cold open and sting. 00:00 — Welcome back, and why her first episode still gets downloads01:00 — The Oracle layoffs, and the severance math02:08 — Getting numb to the coldness of it02:40 — You radiate loyalty your whole career and don't get it back03:41 — The 6 a.m. automated email that doesn't say thank you04:22 — Why identity and job title get intertwined05:08 — "I'm a VP of marketing" as shorthand for who you are06:11 — Title, industry, company. The trifecta.07:18 — The trap: going independent and rebuilding the same role08:16 — "I built the same box I just escaped"09:29 — Brett talked his way back into a full time job and hated it10:26 — We are wired for comfort, and that's not a character flaw11:38 — The losses stack up all at once12:17 — Remembering who you are underneath all of it14:02 — Why skills lists and performance reviews don't work here14:58 — When the doubt spreads to things you were always good at15:50 — The physical toll: illness, accidents, the hospital16:32 — Usefulness, and being told you're not needed17:25 — You're not the most qualified person to say how great you are18:23 — Becoming a detective of your best self19:16 — Why corporate feedback is performative20:00 — What actually happens when you ask21:07 — "Let me tell you a story"23:00 — The surprise birthday party nobody would have predicted24:00 — If you don't believe it, you're calling them liars24:51 — What to do with it: five words26:08 — Using the five as a filter for every opportunity27:00 — But what if nobody has anything good to say?28:19 — The portfolio: when one thing only delivers three of five29:01 — Separate the mission from the money29:55 — "What do you do for fun?" "Fun?"32:15 — What if you could do something you're good at and it's fun33:11 — Ideas need space. You can't rest and be busy at the same time.34:38 — Nine hours in the chair, maybe four of real work35:41 — It nets out the same. You're just doing it on your terms.36:33 — A walk in the park beats a useless meeting40:00 — The former client who'd never go back40:28 — Take a part-time job and watch all your time disappear40:43 — The real hourly math on a hundred thousand dollar salary43:03 — Burn the Map, and where to find Shelley KEY QUOTES"You're radiating this love and loyalty out throughout your career, and then you don't get it back. At the very end, when it matters the absolute most, you don't get it back." — Shelley"I have built the same box for myself that I just escaped. And how is it that I'm back inside of it?" — Shelley"You're not actually the most qualified person to talk about how great you are. Because you're in a world of doubt." — Shelley"If you don't believe that, then you're calling these people liars and you're out of integrity." — Shelley"You can't rest and be busy at the same time. It doesn't work." — Shelley"You might have been in the chair for nine hours a day, but you did not do productive work for nine hours a day. So why are we beating ourselves up when we're being equally productive? We're just doing it on our terms." — Shelley"Instead of going to a useless meeting, what if you could go for a walk in the park?" — Shelley"I had a good contract gig. Instead of building off of that, I convinced the company to bring me back full time, because it was the title and it was more comfortable. I was absolutely miserable." — Brett

4.9
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39 Ratings

About

Brett Trainor Unplugged is for Gen Xers who want to get one step closer to living the life they want—on their terms. After six years of building life beyond the default corporate playbook, thousands of conversations with Gen Xers, entrepreneurs, and experts, and features in Fortune, Fast Company, Forbes, Harvard Business Review, and Inc., Brett Trainor is still on the quest to build his ideal life—and he shares what he learns along the way. Part personal journal, part practical guide, and part curious conversation, this is a candid, lightly produced show about stripping away the noise, rejecting unnecessary grind, and seeing more of what is possible. Brett is a deconstructor, explorer, dot connector, and self-admitted high-functioning lazy person. Through solo episodes and unfiltered conversations with Gen Xers, founders, creators, and experts, he explores the decisions, habits, tools, tradeoffs, and ideas that can help you build a life you actually want to live. The conversations span the areas that make life worth living: money, mind and body, purpose, connections, possibility, and fun. There is no singular path. No hustle theater. No permission required. Just better questions, useful ideas, and real examples that help you see what is possible—and ask: Why not me?

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