Ask Dr. Julie Hanks Dr. Julie Hanks

Listen as I chat with Alyssa and answer the question “How do I heal from a patriarchal marriage and let go of resentment I’m carrying towards the LDS Church?” Alyssa and her husband reevaluated the lessons they were taught about marriage and have worked to move toward a partnership model. She feels angry when she thinks about the time she lost living in a patriarchal marriage and sad when she thinks about her past self who didn’t feel empowered.
I invite Alyssa to allow herself to feel the anger that comes up when she thinks about what she lost. Pushing the anger away will only prolong her healing.
No experience is wasted. There are opportunities Alyssa didn’t have in a patriarchal marriage, and she also gained certain experiences during that time that help her to be who she is today. There are opportunities wasted, but the work that she has been doing is still meaningful. Caring for a home and family is meaningful work. And now she gets to do it consciously and with balance while building a life she loves.



Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

In this podcast episode I sit down with Mallory and answer the question “How do I pursue a high-powered career and still show up as the mom I want to be?” Mallory recently went back to work part-time and is feeling immense guilt. It feels like she can’t win: When she is at work, she feels like she should be staying home with her children (and feel fulfilled while doing it). And when she is at home with her kids, she feels like she should be working harder.
I point out that Mallory is carrying around a lot of “shoulds.” We unpack why she struggles to prioritize her needs and wants. We also do an exercise that could be helpful for those listening if you also struggle with the guilt that comes from feeling there are things that you “should” be doing.



Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

In this episode I talk with Diana and answer the question “How can I better communicate to my husband that I’m not comfortable letting our child sleep at my in-laws’ house?” Diana is not okay with either herself or her child sleeping there because years ago, her father-in-law was arrested for child molestation. Her husband has struggled to respect this boundary.
Diana and I roleplay a conversation with her husband where she holds this boundary firm. She has the right to say no to sleepovers, to trust her intuition, and to set this boundary. Her husband does not have to understand or agree for her to set this boundary, even if it makes things awkward for a time. Diana’s number one job is to keep her child safe.



Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

In this episode, I chat with Christine and answer the question “How should I approach my daughter’s upcoming baptism when I don’t believe 8-year-olds are capable of making this choice?” Christine and her husband have several valid hesitations about their daughter getting baptized when they aren't sure that she really understands what she would be committing to.
Christine and I unpack her concerns and I challenge the thought that her daughter has to be totally “ready” to commit to baptism before she moves forward with it. We also chat about how Christine and her husband can help their daughter develop her sense of self, how they can teach her the values that are important to them, and how they can encourage their daughter to avoid the rigid thinking that is sometimes common in the LDS Church.



Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

In this episode I talk with Sylvia and answer the question “How can I stay engaged and active in the LDS Church as a working mom and a feminist?” Sylvia shares the story of a painful experience at Church that has left her wondering if she sustains her leaders. In fact, she has chosen not to renew her temple recommend because she isn’t sure if she can sustain her current bishopric.
The word sustain has two main definitions. I used to think that sustain meant agree, but I see the word differently now. We talk about what the word actually means, and I invite Sylvia to consider what it would mean if it were okay for her to disagree with her leaders. Ultimately, we each get to decide what it means to us to sustain.



Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.

In today’s episode, I talk with Nicole and answer the question “How do I know if I want kids because I genuinely want them or because it’s always been expected of me?” After a recent break up caused by her partner not wanting to have children, Nicole is hoping to gain some clarity as to what she wants for her future and why.
Nicole and I talk about how to have a meaningful life with or without children, if it matters at the end of the day if she does want kids because it’s what she’s always assumed her future would hold, and how important it is to develop herself in every stage of life. She comes away from our conversation with a clarity on what she wants for her future—give this episode a listen to hear what she decides.



Have you ever thought, “I want to ask Dr. Julie Hanks a question”? Well, now’s your chance! I want to have you on my podcast! Click here to fill out this form and tell me your question. I might just pick you to be on the podcast and receive a free coaching session.

Thank you for listening to the Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast. Please click here to leave me a review. And make sure you don’t miss an episode by following me on Apple Podcast and Spotify.
If you have found this information helpful, you can find additional resources on this topic in my podcast and my online courses. Connect with me on social media @drjuliehanks and work with me through joining DJH membership at drjuliehanks.com. For therapy in Utah visit wasatchfamilytherapy.com.