Sex, Love & Elephants with Dr. Cheryl Cheryl Fraser

“ Dr. Cheryl, my honey and I never fight… Is that okay?” 
“My partner avoids all conflict with me, what can I do?”
“How can my spouse and I learn to communicate more effectively?”

Today’s Sex, Love, and Elephants is part of a series of some of my all-time favorite episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I talk about why a lack of conflict can spell major issues for your relationship—and what you can do to help before it’s too late.
Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program! 
Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I’ve helped through this profound program.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

Zero conflict can spell trouble for your relationship (04:29)

Everyone has a different communication style—which isn’t necessarily a bad thing (05:29)

Your health and happiness in your relationship may be in trouble if you don't learn how to talk about the difficult topics (07:02) 

There’s nothing wrong with you if your nature is to avoid conflict, but it isn’t healthy to sweep things under the rug (09:31)

A technique to begin cleaning out all that crap under the rug (14:49)

This week’s LoveByte (21:05)


Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz.

Let’s Connect!  


Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here 

Youtube


Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

“Dr. Cheryl, is it time for me to leave my relationship?”
“I think my marriage is over… will I regret my decision to split?”
“How do I know if there’s still hope for my sweetheart and me?”

Today’s Sex, Love, and Elephants is the first in a series of some of my all-time favorite episodes that I did a few summers ago. In it, I talk about when to give your relationship another shot—and when it’s time to let it go.

This episode is a couples Q&A series with one of my number one most asked questions: “How do I know when it’s time to leave?” 

Tune in and hear what I’ve learned from my decades of work with couples just like you. 

Are you ready to reconnect with your honey? To create love and passion that last a lifetime? Join the Become Passion waitlist and hear more about the program! 
Want to know more? Check out the Become Passion testimonials for reviews from actual couples that I’ve helped through this profound program.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

When is it time to leave a relationship? Only you and your partner can answer that—but I can help you decide (03:47)

But…If you are in a dangerous, sexually coercive, physically or otherwise abusive relationship, this episode is not for you. Please seek crisis help immediately (07:05)

Research shows that about 50% of people who leave a committed relationship DO regret it. Maybe it’s not too late to begin again (12:03)

Chances are, if you leave one committed relationship, you’ll recouple. That’s our nature as a species. (13:53)


So much of our relationship misery can be rehabilitated (23:04)

This week’s LoveByte (33:58)


Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!

Let’s Connect!  


Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here 

Youtube


Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz.

“Dr. Cheryl, my spouse is driving me crazy! How can I fall in love with them again?”
“I’m constantly annoyed by my partner, is it time to break up?”
“Why is my sweetheart always doing things to piss me off?!”

Think about a negative thought you’ve had about your partner—one that you might not be so eager to share publicly. Maybe they were late for a meaningful dinner, maybe they neglected an important chore, or maybe they even forgot about your anniversary… You were probably pretty irritated, right? But what if I were to tell you that it’s all about the way you react?

On this episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I’m teaching you how to love what is and how we can be more grateful for the extraordinarily lucky lives that we lead. 

The stories you tell yourself can ruin your relationship, ruin your happiness, and even ruin your health.  If you’re upset, disgruntled, or put off by your partner’s mundane mistakes or actions, it's your problem, not your sweetie’s.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

87 to 92% of people eventually recouple after a divorce, a break up, or being widowed (01:24)

The misery in your head is in your head (05:27)

Don’t allow a negative story to take up room in your head and ruin your day (08:41)

Changing a behavioral habit is hard and it takes repetition (14:51)

You are the one who makes yourself happy or not (18:12)

Today’s LoveByte (22:34)


Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!

Let’s Connect!  


Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here 

Youtube


Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz.

“Dr. Cheryl, my marriage is so boring—HELP!”
“How can I bring back the magic and spark to my relationship?”
“Why was my partner so much more attractive when we were first dating?”

Don't wait for a wake up call. Don't wait for an affair. Don't wait until your husband gets a diagnosis that scares the hell out of you—and don't wait for a sudden death. Don't wait until it's too late to show up and love the one you love.

On this episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I’m teaching you all about Marriage Incorporated and how you can best avoid complacency and boredom in your relationship… before it’s too late.

You want to learn how to have a much better, stronger relationship.  Today, we’re talking about cultivating more love, more interest, more kindness, more peacefulness, and how to really be more like we were when we were falling in love.

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

If you are in Marriage Incorporated, you may be having a really nice life, but you’re roommates, not partners (06:30)

You were a lot nicer to your partner when you were dating (16:20)

If you lose your partner suddenly, you’ll quickly realize that, no matter how fraught the relationship has been, you’ll have regrets if you haven't loved well (17:41)

All too often in this short, wonderful, and precious life, we run out of time (23:06)

Your weekly LoveByte (32:27)


Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!

Let’s Connect!  


Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here 

Youtube


Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz.

Today’s episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants is one of my favorites from the early days of the podcast. In it, I talk about why a sincere vow to do better is one of the most important tools in your relationship arsenal, and why a mindful apology is an art in and of itself. 

If I installed a camera in your home and recorded everything you said to your partner for a week—would you be comfortable sharing that footage with your nearest and dearest? The good, the bad, and the ugly? Or would you be ashamed and embarrassed at how you speak and interact with your sweetheart, especially in times of anger or frustration?

Human beings in relationships are going to have disagreements—that’s a fact of life. It sounds harsh, but if most people actually recorded themselves for a week and listened back to the way they spoke to their partner, they would be very disappointed in themselves. The trick is to make sure you and your honey both have the tools to have disagreements that aren’t destructive—disagreements that actually help bring you closer together. I know, right?

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

YOU are responsible for creating a great relationship (04:26)

When you're agitated, your body floods with adrenaline and cortisol, creating temporary aggression and irrationality (06:24)

The opposite of kind speech is ugly speech (09:50)

If you’re in a relationship with a real, live human being, you’re going to have disagreements… and that’s totally fine. (12:45)

Don’t make excuses—apologize like a mofo (14:44)

Your weekly LoveByte (24:29)


Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!

Let’s Connect!  


Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here 

Youtube


Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram 

Want to rate your relationship on the three keys to great long term love? Take the Passion Quiz.

“Dr. Cheryl, why am I so unhappy?”
“I’m always upset—How can I learn to go with the flow?”
“Nothing good ever happens to me, what’s the secret to happiness?”

Why is it that we’re so puzzled about the fundamental ground of what leads to more happiness and less suffering? As it turns out, there is a way to be happy for no reason, a way to have a better, healthier relationship with the person you love, and a way to be a better person.

Today’s episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants features a Dharma Talk that I gave last month on happiness, negativity, and the coping mechanisms we use to deal with it all. 

Tune in and hear my teachings about the most universal experiences that none of us get to escape and the fact that we, as humans, don’t get to change reality. 

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

We’re all going to die—it’s important to make time for wholesome activities (01:40)

Reality sucks sometimes, mortality and loss and suffering is real (10:01)

How we react to big, difficult, painful losses is our choice (18:57)

We cling and try to manipulate reality so it works for us, but it’s a fool's errand (25:48)

Today’s LoveByte (50:54)


Want to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!

Let’s Connect!  


Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here 

Youtube


Follow @drcherylfraser on Instagram