Raw - Heart & Soul Tanya Carroll

In the western world, in my experience, many people have fear around and associated with death and dying. At least this has been my observation.

I lost my first husband, Brian, to Melanoma cancer 16 years ago and his passing was far from a celebration of his life. Whilst I am comfortable in the celebration we had at home after his funeral, there are many things that I would change if I could, about the way he passed away.

As many people in my community have also witnessed, watching a loved one pass away a slow and painful death, is one of the worst experiences you can go through in life.

In this episode I speak with Zenith Virago, who is a deathwalker. She is someone I am thrilled to share with you, in the hope that some elements of what we speak about, help spark a conversation for you with your loved ones.

We talk about:

· How a deathwalker can help support you in life and in passing

· What it means for men to be given the space to show emotion

· The difference between a policy and a law

· Voluntary assisted death

The topic of death is not easy. No-one wants to cause their loved ones grief at the thought of them not being Earthside in a physical capacity. If there is one thing I have learnt from this conversation it is that we have many more choices than we think we do, when it comes to the legalities of our passing, as well as how we want to be celebrated.

Jack’s first step into the world of addiction was around the age of 12 when he smoked pot behind Chadstone shopping centre with a mate’s older brother's friends. It quickly escalated into drinking and taking MDMA.

By the age of 17 he was a fully blown ice addict stealing from his family to fuel his habit.

It was a moment of clarity when he realised he didn’t have enough money to buy a Big M – and the symbolism behind that – that saw him reach out to his family for help, that started his path to recovery.

In this episode Jack and I discuss:

· The honest reasons why people take drugs

· Rehabilitation that saves but sometimes keeps people in perpetual fear

· Alternative methods of recovery that have better outcomes

· Not seeing relapse as inevitable

· Changing the underlying programming that fuels the fire of addiction

· Giving yourself permission to forgive

Jack is the kind of person whose story stays with you long after you stop listening to him talk. The fact that he survived addiction, psychosis and his multiple suicide attempts is testament to the fact he was meant to share his story and change the perception of standard addiction treatment.

Believing in what you know and what you see to be true, and standing up for what you feel in your gut is the right path, takes courage in a world where people’s lives are at stake.

Show notes:

1.48 – The first time, around the age of 12, that I used drugs and why

4.09 – A desperate need to feel accepted and to fit in

8.02 – Hiding it from my parents wasn’t difficult

9.48 – When the wheels of the ‘normal’ life start to fall off

13.00 – People do drugs because it is an amazing experience

14.12 – ‘I love you, but we can’t keep living life like this and I have to protect your younger brother.’

18.23 – People have multiple rock bottoms

19.55 – Reaching out to family for help for the first time

21.40 – Where is the disfunction in a family who lives with an addict?

26.44 – Crossing the line you never think you will cross

29.44 – How the words you use around disease and recovery, matter

34.22 – Stepping outside the standard systems of rehabilitation

37.09 – I believe in asking the question why

39.50 – Universal law and adaptation

42.40 – Chaos cycles

44.08 – Giving yourself permission to change your mind

45.21 – Connection Based Living

52.17 – Spontaneous remission

54.40 – Working outside government mandates

57.08 – Building a program that is proactive rather than reactionary



You will find Jack here:

https://connectionbasedliving.com.au

https://www.instagram.com/realdrugtalk/

https://www.instagram.com/connectionbasedliving/



You will find Tanya here:

www.integritychiropractic.com

www.rawheartandsoul.com

https://www.instagram.com/tanyaacarroll/

https://www.instagram.com/rawheartsoul/

Gee Cormack is one of the world’s best surf coaches. Her programs are being coached all over the world including with the high performance surf athletes of Australia. She is passionate about helping people bring out the best in their surfing, but Gee also works in the mental health space of surf therapy.

Gee established and runs all women’s Surf Chix Surf School on the Northern Beaches of Sydney. This has given women a place where they can feel safe to learn how to surf, from the perspective of women who understand the ocean.

Gee is a highly sought out coach for Smooth Star, a modality that marries surfing to a form of skateboarding that mimics movement in the ocean.

In this episode you will learn:

· How you see yourself when your life changes completely

· Not all mental health therapy works for everyone in the same setting

· How the world of surfing is changing

· Land based training for surfing athletes – how important is it

· The difference in coaching women and men in surfing

This is a fascinating look into behind the scenes of how the sport of surfing is evolving and how land based training and wave pools are changing the way we train our upcoming youth in the sport.



Show notes 

0.34 – When did Gee start snowboarding/skiing?

3.19 – Retirement at 20 and learning what life after training to be an Olympic athlete is like

4.37 – How did you cope with the change in your identity – and growing up with dyslexia

6.16 – Growing up with family members who have significant mental health problems

7.30 – Moving to a remote area of Bali in the search for understanding of what was going on inside her brain

9.16 – Being the best and learning to believe in myself

11.37 – Being a better person for everyone else at the expense of your own health

14.45 – When did Gee’s surf coaching career begin?

20.20 – Comparison of severity – and how we get out of that mindset

21.49 – The intensity of therapy in the confines of four walls

25.12 – The bubble around coaching high performance athletes

26.52 – How important is land based training for surf athletes?

28.40 – Speed generation – the most important element of surfing

30.20 – Strengthening neural pathways – minimal movement, maximum energy

39.00 – What are the major differences between coaching women and men?

46.46 – Coaching with coaches



You can find Gee here:  

https://chixsurfschool.com.au 

You can find Tanya here: 

 www.rawheartandsoul.com 

www.integritychiropractic.com

This conversation brings up a lot for discussion in terms of not just current and retired players of the AFL but society as a whole and how head trauma can be the catalyst of the downward spiral in mental health.

Peter and I also discuss how head trauma might affect children as young as 6 years of age, who are playing impact sports that result in head trauma.

All of these have wide implications how we look at and treat mental health and often the extension of that, domestic violence.

To say this is an important conversation is a gross understatement.

In this episode we discuss:

· Neurological impairment as a result of brain trauma

· The four pillars by which we measure brain impairment

· The concussion rule in the AFL

· Women playing AFL

· Children and brain trauma

As a parent and grandparent, and an avid supporter of AFL this conversation has left me questioning if I have truly evaluated the risk versus rewards of contact sport. And as Peter says, are we treating the brain with the respect we should, when we have three weeks off with a hamstring injury and just 12 days for a brain injury?



Show Notes:



1.28 – When Peter’s career of managing AFL players began

4.38 – Managing negotiations of Nicky Winmar’s contract

7.23 – Concussion rules in the AFL

8.17 – The four pillars by which to measure brain trauma – mood, behaviour, cognition and motor skills

9.07 – Neurological impairment

9.43 – Staggering statistics in former AFL players who are showing symptoms of brain trauma, including structural damage

12.01 – Dylan Grimes and does delayed concussion exist

14.44 – Primary testing prior to playing AFL

18.44 – Danny Frawley and Shane Tuck

19.46 – CTE and how it is diagnosed

22.23 – Shaun Smith’s record payout and the Bradford Hill causation paradigm

25.00 – Children playing AFL and the research of Vicky Anderson into children’s brain trauma

26.40 - Prevention and mitigation strategies

28.06 - Nick Riewoldt’s comments in regard to players being able to make their own decision on playing after a concussion

30.09 – Player education on brain trauma

29.45 – Insurance policies not being fit for purpose

32.26 – Women in AFL – the dose rate of brain trauma as a result of concussion is lower in women than in men – Jacinda Barclay

33.30 – Maggie Varcoe

37.40 – How do we make the game of AFL safe?



You can find Peter here:

https://www.pjaaccountants.com.au



You can find Tanya here:

www.rawheartandsoul.com

www.integritychiropractic.com.au

Instagram: rawheartandsoul

This episode comes with a trigger warning.

Can you imagine living everyday not knowing if the next phone call you are going to receive is going to be the one telling you that your child had died as a result of a drug overdose?

That is where you will find my guest on this episode, Stacey Brown.

Two years ago, her life and that of her family was upended when her 17 year old son tried to commit suicide by driving his car into a tree. Two months prior to this, Dylan accidentally overdosed at home using household products.

In this podcast Stacey and I, in a very raw and difficult conversation discuss:

· A history of substance abuse

· Mental health and the failing health care system

· Unconscious enabling

· When the popularity of supporting a cause wears off

Stacey’s family’s trauma is being played out behind closed doors all over the world. With much courage Stacey is sharing her pain in the hope that it helps break down the stigma that surrounds mental health and substance abuse.



Show Notes:

1.28 – Nothing like I could have expected and everything I needed

1.51 – A life crisis and complete change in career, starting from the ground up

4.10 – Reiki and my own healing journey

6.11 - My son the fighter, the varsity football player and now drug addict

7.53 – Overdose on household products and mental health

9.00 – A history of substance abuse

11.12 – Your body goes into shock when you experience major trauma

15.50 – Begging to keep my son in rehab care

18.00 – How has your son’s mental health affected your family

19.32 – Community support after the initial accidental overdose

25.50 – Unconscious enabling

30.36 – You can’t say you didn’t know

31.50 – How do we prevent this?

37.00 – What support do you need to fulfill your soul purpose?

38.11 – When the popularity of supporting a cause wears off

39.30 – What can families do to prevent this trauma?

40.30 – What is your best parenting advice?

Scott Darlow is someone that I had wanted to speak with on my podcast for some time. I saw him play back up for Eskimo Joe in late 2019 and new that he was someone with an interesting story. I also knew that he would challenge my perceptions and some of the ways in which I was raised.
This is an important episode in a few different ways, but mainly because it has opened the door wider to me on what began as a journey of confronting, accepting and doing better in the area of racism in my own life.
In this episode Scott and I speak about:
· Currency and what that means to us each individually
· Luck – does it really exist
· Generational lenses
· Michael Gudinski and who he was to Scott

Show notes
0.26 – Who is Scott Darlow?
3.01 – A change in direction of career after a life changing event
4.29 – Currency
5.40 – Michael Gudinski and ‘for me, life is about how you are going to spend your one true currency
7.10 – ‘Man, you’re so lucky.’
12.04 – Why is culture important?
17.03 – What is your spiritual practice?
21.19 – Generational lenses
24.29 – Have you had to defend your culture because of the way you look?
26.46 – FLUTE
27.21 – How far have we come since Kevin Rudd’s ‘Sorry’? And how can we improve?
29.00 – Shepparton High School – the new super school
31.00 – Intercultural understanding
32.50 – What is it about your culture that you think the world needs to know about?
34.55 – What did Michael Gudinski mean to you?
38.50 – Unrealistic expectations
39.48 – How can we support Australian music artists?

You will find Scott here:

www.scottdarlow.com

You will find Tanya here:

www.rawheartandsoul.com
www.integritychiropractic.com.au
Instagram: rawheartsoul
Facebook: Raw - Heart and Soul Podcast