The Adult Chair Michelle Chalfant

In my 25 years of private practice, the #1 issue I worked on with clients was feeling their emotions. 
Whether someone was anxious, reactive and raging or numb to the world, the question they were all asking was, “What the heck do I do with these emotions?”
I’ve been there too. And it breaks my heart, because experiencing emotions is one of the gifts of being human. 
But the good news is that all of us can reclaim this part of ourselves and learn to feel our emotions. And when we do, it unlocks all kinds of possibilities in life! 
In this episode, I’m breaking down why it’s so important that we learn to feel our emotions and some practical ways to do that. I’m also addressing some of the common fears and discomfort around feeling emotions (like, “What if I get stuck in this emotion?”) and helping you understand why this is your birthright – and how it can improve your relationships, your intuition and your life! 
Listen to discover:
●       Why it's so important to feel your emotions
●       Why most humans struggle with this
●       Four practical ways to feel your emotions
●       How to connect with your inner child
●       How to overcome blocks in feeling emotions
No one is born without emotions, but along the way, we learn to suppress them – and in turn, disconnect from who we really are. 
Feeling emotions is the key to connecting back to yourself and one of the foundational pillars of being a healthy adult. I hope this episode helps guide you back to this essential part of you.
"We'd have a completely different world if we were all able to tune into what our emotions are." - Michelle Chalfant
"We become whole humans when we feel our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant
"We're all born to feel emotions." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we feel our emotions, it is a gateway into our intuition. We have enhanced intuition when we are in tune with and know what we are feeling emotionally." - Michelle Chalfant
"Instead of asking yourself, 'What do I think?" ask yourself, "What do I feel?'" - Michelle Chalfant
"Empathy is when we're able to tune into another person and feel what they're feeling. It's a beautiful skill to have." - Michelle Chalfant
"Connecting with the inner child is simply activating an energy." - Michelle Chalfant
"There's so much power in feeling our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES 
Free Inner Child Resource
https://theadultchair.com/innerchild
BRAND NEW: The Adult Chair® Live – April 14-15, 2023
Attend in-person in Charlotte, NC or Virtually
https://theadultchair.com/charlotte/ 
Headspace
Try it free for 30 days
https://www.headspace.com/adult30 
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
https://theadultchair.com 
The Adult Chair® Events
https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ 
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

You just met the new love of your life, and after a season of single parenting, you’re so excited to build a life with your new partner and create a beautiful blended family. 
But you don’t just have yourself to think about. Between their kids, your kids, exes and in-laws, forming new bonds and creating healthy dynamics can be, well, complicated. Not only do you want to be a great parent or stepparent to your blended family, but you’re also navigating brand new territory with your partner, from different parenting styles to setting healthy boundaries.
Certified Adult Chair® Coach, Amber Jones, has lived this as a mom and stepmom to a blended family of six children, and in this show, she drops a wealth of wisdom on how to create connected blended families from your Adult Chair.
We talk about the nitty gritty of boundaries with exes, building relationships with stepchildren, parenting roles, when to introduce your children to a new partner, and how to deepen your relationship with your partner. 
And, like everything in The Adult Chair®, we know that the true work happens within, so Amber also walks us through how to work with our own triggers, the importance of self-worth and why navigating blended family dynamics can be such a beautiful opportunity to work on ourselves. 
Listen to discover:
Amber's story of navigating divorce, dating and remarriage in a blended family of six kids When to introduce your kids to a new partner How to navigate different parenting styles The two most common struggles for blended families   The importance of centering the relationship and the "couple bubble" How to deal with pressures from outside the relationship  How long-term relationships can be a mirror for growth The power of gratitude in your relationship   Tips for increasing connection with your partner Amber is a wonderful relationship coach, and whether you’re part of a blended family, considering dating again, dating someone with children or just looking to strengthen your relationship, kids or no kids, this episode is for you!
"We both really believe that the relationship is the foundation of the whole family." - Amber Jones
"You have to be a unified front." - Michelle Chalfant 
"Your self-worth has to be very intact. You have to know that you're worthy and that your partner loves you and that you're good enough." - Amber Jones
"I think that when it comes to exes, it's really the responsibility of the partner whose ex it is to manage and handle the ex. " - Amber Jones 
"You've got to be #1 on each other's list." - Michelle Chalfant 
"The biggest problems that I see are because of other people outside of the relationship causing issues within the relationship." - Amber Jones
"I think there's so much power in those words of just saying, 'I believe you. I believe your experience.'" - Amber Jones
"Triggers are a gift because they show us our inner beliefs about ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES 
Amber Jones Website
https://www.amberjonescoaching.com/
Amber Jones Instagram
https://instagram.com/amberjonescoaching/
Episode #98: Transforming Triggers
https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/98-transforming-triggers/ 
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
https://theadultchair.com 
The Adult Chair® Events
https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ 
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

We’ve all felt it: the extra tense political discussions, the harsh climate on social media and the overall division between people. It often feels like half the planet is living in a different world and we just can’t seem to understand each other.
This isn’t just in our heads. Studies show that empathy has declined 40% since 1979, and today, one third of people say they can’t easily see the point of view of somebody else.
We have to learn how to listen, hear and respect each other again.
The good news is that we can all learn empathy!
My guest today, Rob Volpe, has mastered the art of empathy both in his personal relationships and through his work in market research. Since his job is all about listening to people and creating connections, he’s learned to identify the specific attitudes and behaviors that help people hear each other and feel heard – and he’s here today to empower us with five simple steps to building more empathy in our life and world!
Listen to discover:
●       What empathy actually is
●       The wonderful things empathy can fuel in our lives
●       The difference between emotional empathy and cognitive empathy
●       What to do if you have a partner who doesn't have a lot of empathy
●       The difference between empathy and agreement
●       Shocking stats about the decline in empathy
●       The factors driving our current empathy crisis
●       5 steps to build more empathy today
Empathy is something we talk a lot about but have trouble defining and practicing. We also tend to think it’s a quality someone either has or doesn’t – when in reality, we are all capable of empathy, and we all need to consistently practice our empathy skills.
You don’t have to naturally feel the emotions of others to be empathetic. By setting aside our judgments, asking good questions and listening with curiosity, we can stop talking past each other and learn how to really love each other, even when we disagree!
"Empathy as it's defined is about connecting with other people on either an emotional or a cognitive level to understand the lived experience of somebody else as if you were them." - Rob Volpe
"Empathy is needed for healthy relationships." - Michelle Chalfant
"We just want to be seen, heard and know that we're enough." - Rob Volpe
"It's not about agreeing. It's about witnessing and really seeing and hearing them." - Michelle Chalfant
"One third of adults could not easily see the point of view of other people."  - Rob Volpe
"We're living what I call 'chin up'...and when we're chin up and living in the head space, we're ready to defend. We're not listening." - Michelle Chalfant
"We just need to take the time to listen to one another and hear what the other person is saying and not be so defensive." - Rob Volpe
LINKS & RESOURCES 
Rob Volpe Website
https://www.5stepstoempathy.com/ 
"Tell Me More About That" (Rob Volpe book)
https://www.amazon.com/Tell-More-About-That-Conversation/dp/1774580896
Rob Volpe Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/empathy_activist/
Rob Volpe TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@empathyactivist
The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle
https://theadultchair.com/worthy 
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
https://theadultchair.com 
The Adult Chair® Events
https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ 
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

Cheers. Salud. Skol. 
Wherever you are in the world, it seems like alcohol punctuates every celebration. 
But have we stopped to ask if alcohol is really good for us? Or have we paused to get curious about why we drink – and when it moves from genuine enjoyment to unhealthy numbing out?
Recently, I’ve noticed more people having conversations about sobriety, from giving up drinking entirely to swapping a few cocktails for mocktails, and I thought it was time we talked about alcohol through the lens of The Adult Chair®.
In this episode, I’m chatting with Laura McKowen, who has written extensively about getting sober and runs a global sobriety support community. She openly and vulnerably shares her story of using alcohol to numb her emotions, why and how she got sober and what her life looks like now.
We talked about how our culture normalizes excessive drinking, all the emotions that come up when getting sober and ways to tell if you might have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. If you’re at all “sober curious,” you’re going to love hearing her perspective! 
Listen to discover:
●       Laura's story of getting sober and why she chose to stop drinking
●       How drinking culture normalizes excessive drinking
●       Busting health myths about alcohol
●       The connection between alcohol and anxiety
●       How Laura's life got better when she got sober
●       The way we use alcohol to numb our emotions
●       How to develop a healthier relationship with alcohol, whether you choose to cut it out completely or enjoy it in moderation
Like everything in The Adult Chair, we aren’t talking in terms of “do” or “don’t” or “good” or “bad,” but about bringing consciousness into the decisions we make.
My goal for this show is not to tell you to stop drinking, but to encourage you to take a closer look at when you drink, why you drink and how you drink so you can truly live life to the fullest: present, awake and alive!
"I knew I liked to drink a little too much. I loved it a little too much." - Laura McKowen
[When offered a drink after a bad day] "I don't want a glass of wine. I would like to come talk to you about my emotions though." - Michelle Chalfant
"We end up recreating our life in a way that decenters alcohol...my life is still my life." - Laura McKowen
"When you are drinking even a little more than you want to, it keeps you from facing the truth." - Laura McKowen
"Alcohol provides a really great shield to just sort of skim across the top of life." - Laura McKowen
"I was in a lot of emotional pain. I know that's exactly why I reached for alcohol." - Michelle Chalfant
"We don't get away with not feeling things. It goes somewhere." - Laura McKowen
"Shame disconnects us from our humanity and the humanity in other people." - Laura McKowen
"The not drinking wasn't the cure....it was actually connecting with other people in a meaningful way and healing in relationship with people that allowed me to heal." - Laura McKowen
LINKS & RESOURCES 
Laura McKowen Website
https://www.lauramckowen.com/ 
Laura McKowen Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/laura_mckowen/
"Push Off From Here" (Laura McKowen Book)
https://www.lauramckowen.com/books 
The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle
https://theadultchair.com/worthy 
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
https://theadultchair.com 
The Adult Chair® Events
https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ 
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant

There is an old Irish proverb that says, “A good friend is like a four-leaf clover; hard to find and lucky to have.” 
While some people thrive in a big group and others prefer to have a few close friends, there isn’t a human on the planet who doesn’t need friends! 
But making friends seems to get harder as we get older. Gone are the days of finding a BFF because you happened to sit next to each other on the school bus. Friendship in adulthood takes intentional effort.
In this episode, I talk to psychologist and friendship expert, Dr. Marisa G. Franco, about how to create deep, meaningful relationships as an adult. We talk about why love is so much more than just romantic partnerships, how our attachment style impacts our friendships and the “recipe” for a deep friendship. 
Dr. Franco shares lots of practical tips on how to feel more confident in social situations, places to make new friends, conversation starters and how to get over the fear of rejection. 
Listen to discover:
●       The importance and power of friendship
●       How your attachment style impacts how you make friends
●       How to make friends as an adult
●       The ingredients required for organic friendships to form
●       The "liking gap" and how it impacts the way we show up with others
●       A method for initiating conversation
●       Why you shouldn't fear rejection
Though busy schedules, family commitments and adult responsibilities can make friendship more difficult, connection really boils down to two things: repeated interactions and shared vulnerability. When we understand this, along with our own attachment style, we can take conscious steps to find our people – no matter where we are in life.
"How we've connected has shaped who we are...then who you are affects how you connect." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"Research finds, for example, that even learning about attachment theory shifts your attachment a bit." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"Being secure is not about never feeling insecure. It's about having an alternative secure voice too and leaning into or buying into the more secure side of you." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"That's one of my biggest tips when it comes to making friends: assume people like you when it's ambiguous." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"When we really work with our attachment styles, it can really just change the whole way we see the world." - Michelle Chalfant
"If you're an adult and you don't have that [infrastructure for meeting new people] anymore, you can't assume it's going to happen organically. You have to try." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"Find a community that's going to give you repeated unplanned interaction and shared vulnerability." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"You also have to overcome covert avoidance. And covert avoidance is our tendency to show up physically but check out mentally." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"People are less likely to reject you than you think." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"It's not so much about what you say. It's about the fact that you are opening up conversation." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"Rejection is just part of the process of connection." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"I think we need to remind ourselves too that if someone doesn't like us, it might have nothing to do with us." - Michelle Chalfant
"I think there are so many ways that sometimes what we think is a rejection, the other person is actually thinking of as consideration." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco
"Oftentimes, it's not about us. It's about something that other person is going through." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES 
Dr. Marisa G. Franco Website
https://drmarisagfranco.com/
"Platonic" (Dr. Marisa G. Franco book)
https://drmarisagfranco.com/about/platonic-the-book/ 
Dr. Marisa G. Franco Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/drmarisagfranco/ 
The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle
https://theadultchair.com/worthy 
HelloFresh
http://hellofresh.com

There are so many different aspects of being an emotionally healthy adult. We’re complex, connected beings, and our bodies, our minds, our emotions, our spiritual lives…they all play a role in how we feel every day.
It all matters!
One of the areas we don’t talk about enough is our hormones. Hormones impact SO many of our bodily and mental functions, and we’ve been kept in the dark about them for too long! Everyone deserves to understand this part of themselves!
In this episode, I talk to hormone health educator Candace Burch to help us understand all things hormones…and wow, is she a WEALTH of information! 
We talk about how hormones impact our lives from our teenage years all the way through menopause, the symptoms of hormonal imbalances and all the related topics when it comes to hormones: birth control, fertility, anxiety, acne, PCOS, stress and SO much more.
You will walk away with a much better understanding of the role of each hormone in your body and the empowered choices you have when it comes to balancing your hormones. 
Listen to discover:
The classic signs and symptoms of hormone imbalances
Some of the things that can contribute to hormone balance
Hormonal changes you can expect in each stage of life
The key female hormones and the importance of adrenal health
How to approach hormone testing and replenishment/supplementation
The root cause of PCOS
This show focuses on female hormones since they are so complex, but I hope it is helpful for all of us to recognize that our internal chemistry and the cyclical nature of our bodies are not to be ignored. 
When we learn to work with our bodies, trust our intuitions and get support when we’re feeling out of balance, we can take more ownership of our health through every stage of life.
"Painful periods are not normal." - Candace Burch
"So many women are not aware of the symptoms or they become their symptoms." - Candace Burch
"The whole concept of hormone imbalance is relatively new." - Candace Burch
"Ovulation disruption is one of the big reasons people become hormonally imbalanced." - Candace Burch
"When you talk about health or hormonal health in any case, it's always about nutrient dense proteins, good nutrition." - Candace Burch
"That's key: keeping blood sugar stable." - Candace Burch
"There's this inevitable road to hormones shifting, but they shouldn't be shifting like a roller coaster." - Candace Burch
"I think a lot of people don't even know how to relax anymore." - Candace Burch
"The adrenals are key to everything really." - Candace Burch
"There are not a lot of studies with intermittent fasting with women." - Michelle Chalfant
"Progesterone is the great balancing hormone." - Candace Burch
"Estrogen has so many functions. We need it." - Candace Burch
"I'm a fan of hormone replenishment when testing takes place first, in measured doses." - Candace Burch
"High cortisol at night is really problematic." - Candace Burch
"I think most PCOS is very much linked to insulin resistance and an imbalance of blood sugar." - Candace Burch
"Anyone that has PCOS doesn't need to feel helpless and hopeless." - Candace Burch
"I think women have to trust their intuition." - Candace Burch
LINKS & RESOURCES 
Candace Burch Website
https://www.yourhormonebalance.com/
Use code ADULTCHAIR50 for $50 off hormone testing
Your Hormone Balance Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/yourhormonebalance 
The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle
https://theadultchair.com/worthy 
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
https://theadultchair.com  
The Adult Chair® Events 
https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification
https://theadultchair.com/certification

STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ 
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.yout