Sorry, I Missed This: The Everything Guide to ADHD and Relationships with Cate Osborn

It can be hard to navigate relationships when you have ADHD. Host Cate Osborn has ADHD, a background in sex education, and a whole lot of questions like “How do I know what I want out of a relationship? How do I remember my friends exist? What can I do to handle conflict better?” Tune in to Sorry, I Missed This to learn about topics like social skills, boundaries, communication, intimacy, and sex. Join Cate in unpacking the taboo, painful, and often hilarious challenges of being in a relationship when you have ADHD.

  1. Why good sex can make your ADHD brain spiral

    16 June

    Why good sex can make your ADHD brain spiral

    Do you feel almost manic after really good sex — craving more, making impulsive decisions, fixating on the next time? In this episode of Reddit reactions, Cate and Jessamine tackle five real Reddit posts from ADHD women.  Digging into some seriously NSFW posts, they look at why some people with ADHD never feel spontaneous sexual attraction — and why that might be about “out of sight, out of mind.” Also… The orgasm pressure problem: When a partner’s need for reassurance after sex gets in the way of intimacy. The sex countdown: The anxiety loop that starts the moment sex ends (“It’s been X days”). And how scheduling intimacy (not sex specifically) can interrupt it. Hyperfixation and libido: Does getting obsessively into a show, book, or research topic actually raise your sex drive?  Real Reddit questions, really good answers.  For more on this topic  Watch: ADHD and sex Watch: Reddit reactions: ADHD and romantic relationships! For a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. You can also listen to episodes of Sorry, I Missed This on The ADHD Channel for Women (formerly known as MissUnderstood).  Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    25 min
  2. Why neurodivergent women can’t stop reading smut and romantasy

    2 June

    Why neurodivergent women can’t stop reading smut and romantasy

    Did you know that women with ADHD consume explicit fiction at dramatically higher rates than neurotypical women — and there’s a neurological reason? Dr. Erika Miley is a licensed mental health counselor, certified sex therapist, and author of the only dissertation published on ADHD and women’s sexuality. After surveying over 2,000 participants, one thing kept surfacing: smut. Romantasy, explicit romance, audio erotica — all of it. In this episode, she explains why the ADHD brain is uniquely drawn to literary erotica, how smut raises the arousal threshold enough to sustain focus, and why neurodivergent women are using it for everything from processing emotional vulnerability to getting through household chores.  Find Dr. Miley at erikamiley.com. For more on this topic Watch: ADHD and sex Watch: Too much or not enough: ADHD sensory challenges and sex For a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. You can also listen to episodes of Sorry, I Missed This on The ADHD Channel for Women (formerly known as MissUnderstood).  Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    19 min
  3. ADHD, AuDHD, and self-diagnosis: Is it valid?

    19 May

    ADHD, AuDHD, and self-diagnosis: Is it valid?

    Is ADHD self-diagnosis valid? According to clinical psychologist Dr. Elizabeth Kilmer, that’s the wrong question entirely. When access to diagnosis is limited by cost, insurance, stigma, and identity — and when the people who self-diagnose show higher rates of negative self-image and internalized stigma — the real conversation isn’t about validity. It’s about how we make sure people have access to good information. Cate and Dr. Kilmer dig into what really happens when people research their own neurodivergence. They discuss research analyzing 452,000 Reddit posts that found self-diagnosed individuals seek more social validation. But they benefit less from it. They cover what actually happens in a clinical ADHD assessment and how comorbidities like anxiety, depression, and OCD complicate the picture. And they discuss why the question “Is self-diagnosis valid?” misses the point when getting a formal diagnosis is a privilege that many can’t access. For more on this topic Read: Missed, misread, misdiagnosed: Current state of women with ADHD Listen: Is ADHD online diagnosis legit? For a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org. You can also listen to episodes of Sorry, I Missed This on The ADHD Channel for Women (formerly known as MissUnderstood).  Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    21 min

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
4 Ratings

About

It can be hard to navigate relationships when you have ADHD. Host Cate Osborn has ADHD, a background in sex education, and a whole lot of questions like “How do I know what I want out of a relationship? How do I remember my friends exist? What can I do to handle conflict better?” Tune in to Sorry, I Missed This to learn about topics like social skills, boundaries, communication, intimacy, and sex. Join Cate in unpacking the taboo, painful, and often hilarious challenges of being in a relationship when you have ADHD.

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