The Hummingbird Prayer Podcast

Emma Cardinal
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Women and our medicine; a podcast to remember the wisdom we carry in birth, death, and the sacred mysteries. ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com

Episodes

  1. Grief as Medicine with Amber Wolf Moon

    21/09/2025

    Grief as Medicine with Amber Wolf Moon

    Suicide, illness, and miscarriage — all variations of how death can greet us, initiating a pilgrimage of grief. Death arrives without a knock, claiming life whether we are ready or not… Today, I am joined by a dear friend who has walked alongside death for most of her life with profound intimacy. From navigating the suicide of her mother at age 4, then the death of her step-mother a few years after; she was touched and ultimately forever changed by being thrusted into a life of grief. In her adulthood she once again was greeted by death when her ex-fiancé passed suddenly also from suicide following the miscarriage of her daughter, Knova. Amber Wolf Moon, a Somatic Relational Therapist & Ceremonial Embodiment Facilitator, shares her journey alongside death and how this has influenced her to support others heal while walking with their grief in an intentional way. Her work now is rooted in an empathic approach to healing, mental health, grief, and spiritual work. Throughout this recording Amber will share various tools and techniques on how to intentionally work with your grief from a somatic therapy perspective. This conversation feels more like a ceremony than a podcast — A prayer in the form of 2 sisters in a space of sacred storytelling and dialogue. Light a candle, brew some tea, set an altar, grab your journal, and burn some sacred herbs; you are welcomed into a space of deep feeling, learning, and prayer. Deep gratitude to Amber for showing up with such vulnerability and beauty as she continues to walk the path of service. Your humanness is inspiring. You can learn more about Ambers offerings with the descriptions below and connect with her through her website. We dedicate this conversation to all the well beings and ancestors that have passed on and are here with us in Spirit. Thank you, thank you, thank you. If you are wanting to receive grief support from a holistic, soul, creative perspective I am currently accepting 1:1 Grief Pilgrimage clients as well as currently offering Medicine readings (available both in person & virtually). Apply for a 1:1 Grief Pilgrimage. To book a Medicine Reading, please connect with me via email: ahummingbirdprayer@gmail.com To those of you with us today: All of you is welcome here. Thank you for listening and being part of this community space. You are not alone. With reverence, Emma Cardinal “Amber Wolf Moon is an Evolutionary Embodiment Guide, Somatic Relational Therapist, Registered Therapeutic Counsellor, Yoga Teacher, and Sacred Ceremony Facilitator. She has supported beings of all walks of life world wide and brings her sacred soul service wherever she goes as that is her deepest devotion. Her work was initiated through the spirit of her Mother who passed from suicide when she was 4. Her mother chose to leave from a deep yearning to belong and Amber's mission is to create safe spaces, circles, and 1-1 containers so the ones who work with her can feel an embodied sense of belonging to place, to self, and to loved ones. Her 1-1 sessions online and in-person are greatly influenced by her Somatic Therapy studies, spiritual teachings, and deep attunement to creating a space where all her clients can feel safe to unwind the depth of their wholeness. Grounded Wholeness Somatic Therapy being her business name was chosen as that is the feedback she continuously got from all clients leaving each session feeling more grounded, embodied, relaxed, and connected. Amber has a fine skill of being able to hold the unbearable parts, experiences, and traumas that would be too much for a client to hold on their own. She gives her clients the tools to learn to be more embodied, aware of the nervous system response/reaction and have immense amount of resources to call upon when challenges and discomfort occurs. Her focus is less on talk therapy and going into the past, and more on the felt sense experience of the body in present time awareness; cultivating a sense of equanimity to meet all parts of who we are with curiosity, compassion, and presence. She is passionate about integration and always offers tools that feel easeful to apply into everyday life.” You can work with Amber online or in person. She currently accepting new clients for Somatic Relational Therapy, Couples Therapy, & Womb Journeys. Website: groundedwholeness.com Instagram: @amberwolfmoon This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    2h 5m
  2. The Sacred "I Don't Know": An honest Reflection on our experiences with Freebirth

    04/09/2025

    The Sacred "I Don't Know": An honest Reflection on our experiences with Freebirth

    Here sit two women, two mothers — who have both walked the path of freebirth, each with vastly different outcomes. One, cradling her daughter in her arms; the other, with her son’s ashes on upon her altar. — Welcome to an honest afternoon conversation with my dear friend Eden as she offers transparent reflections about her choice to freebirth her daughter in November of 2023. This is the first time Eden has openly shared her raw and unfiltered opinion on her birth experience in the almost 2 years since her daughter, Flora, came earth-side. Together we explore the evolution of our perspectives, opinions, and understandings about birth as a whole. Openly sharing what went into our decision making while we were pregnant together, the “propaganda” we received from freebirthing courses, educational streams, books, and podcasts, as well as what we understand about birth now. Throughout our time together as friends, sisters, and mothers — navigating birth as well as death — we have both learned, shifted, and evolved far beyond the women that we were when we first met. “It’s okay to change your mind — and that’s why I haven’t really said anything, because my mind is changed. And I would not speak about freebirth in the ways that I did in the past. I feel a lot of compassion for that past version of me and for the women who look at freebirth as that moral-higher-than — but I'm also grateful to have been her so that I can feel what it feels like to be changed from that.” — Eden Elizabeth We contemplate many things, questions, and ideas throughout this conversation: Do we still agree with freebirth?Is there a totally correct way to birth in order to eliminate risk?Would we choose freebirth again?What would you tell your past self about birth?How do you tend to the universally humbling unknowable mystery?Can you hold the raw true statement “I don’t know” with sacred hands? In so many ways, we leave this conversation with more questions than answers — Ultimately though, what we seem to return to time and time again is: there is no one right way. To live, birth, grieve, love, mother, or be… — It never ceases to bring me to my knees at how healing it can be when women come together in sacred dialogue. May this contemplative conversation be an offering to you. Thank you for being here and listening to this recording with Eden, it’s an honour to have you in this space with us. What are your thoughts? What did this conversation bring up for you?Did this bring up judgements, biases, beliefs, ideas?How has birth changed you? Do you think/feel that there is a singularly better way to birth?What would you say to your past self? The comments are available and open to you. Posting this with reverence and a heart full of I-don’t-know’s,Emma Cardinal More about Eden ElizabethSOMATIC STORYTELLER | BODY POETRYdancer with a poet heart — the intersection of body + voice “Eden is a Mother, a Storyteller, a Ritualist, and lover of the ceremonial. She is inspired by what is real, raw, and human. Her vision is of a world where Women are living more deeply in connection to the land, their bodies, and their medicine. Eden has accepted her responsibility and role as a Way-shower and Map-maker in these times, and is devoted to sharing her story and bringing Women along with her as she meets her own edges of shame, pain, discomfort, pleasure, joy, and ecstasy.” You can find and connect with Eden: On Instagram: @creatingeden On Substack: Eden Elizabeth Receive her offerings: https://bio.site/creatingeden x https://www.bodypoetry.art/ The birth story referenced in this conversation Nicolle & Jake share the birth story of their son Fox This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    1hr 36min

  3. 14/05/2025

    The Space Between Our Stories

    Walking the path of pregnancy together as friends then coming out of the birth portal as mothers; we would continue our walk as sisters, one nursing her daughter while the other mourned her son with empty arms. This brought a challenge: how could we show up for one another through such contrast and deep pain? For us that looked like: ceremony and allowing. Allowing there to be space for grief, anger, sadness, sorrow — while also being open to the beauty of the new life that was gazing up at us with bright green eyes. Creating ceremony where there could be spaciousness for both of our experiences. This was, and continues to be hard — for every milestone that Eden’s daughter touches, I am continuously reminded of the life my son wont ever get to live. Such is the dance of life intermingled with grief, the depths of medicine awaiting us in sisterhood and as women… if we only have the courage to sit at one another’s feet. — Join me and my beloved spirit sister as we sit in tea ceremony reflecting on our journey through pregnancy, birth, death, postpartum, and ceremony. In this raw, unedited, emotional conversation we compassionately explore the women we used to be, the beliefs we used to carry, and the mindsets we had going into (free)birth as first-time mothers. Together we explore the challenges, the ceremonies, and the healing rituals — like Blessing Ways, Red Thread Ceremonies, and The Closing of The Bones — that have shaped our paths. We dive into how our bond as friends and sisters has deepened, how we’ve held each other through grief and joy, and how the medicine of truly facing what’s uncomfortable can transform us. It’s a conversation about how we showed up for each other, even when the weight of life and loss seemed too much to bear. — This conversation is far from polished or perfect.. quite the opposite actually. Found in all the imperfections and technical flaws is an undeniable truth. Amidst the choppy audio and pixilated video, there is authentic relating. You’ll notice about half way through our conversation, we had technical issues and had to continue on in a new way. This feels appropriate to our journey as women… as sisters — beginning one way, with the assumption that things will flow and work out; only to be met with a complication, a disruption… and still continuing on our walk through motherhood together. I considered rerecording this conversation… but the rawness of our storytelling would be difficult to recreate, and woven within the imperfectness is a humble reality. What you see here is us… And just as birth and death are messy and imperfect, so are we… as is this episode. So, true to the type of content I put out, in all of its rawness — here is … well, here is us. In reverence, Emma This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    1hr 52min
  4. Remembering Anarcha Westcott

    26/04/2025

    Remembering Anarcha Westcott

    This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com I don’t do trigger warnings for what I share in this space because life doesn’t come with a trigger warning. Nature doesn’t wrap things in a digestive bubble and honestly, it doesn’t feel correct for me to put a warning on my lived experiences. If you’re here with me in this corner of the internet, you’ll quickly learn that the subject matter of my work is deep, heavy, and quite frankly… not for everyone. So, if you want to click away, that’s okay — I wont fault you for it, but for those that want to expand their resilience and explore the depths of what humans can endure… thank you for being here. Your presence is appreciated more than you know. This recording in particular speaks of a woman named Anarcha Westcott, the mother of modern Gynaecology. The history of her connection to Dr. J Marion Sims is profoundly controversial, inhumanly barbaric, and important to be understood. Upon finding out who she was, through wails and moans, I found myself researching as much as I possibly could. A contrasting mix of emotions flood my body when I think of her; everything from gratitude to horror, and always accompanied by a river of tears. I share her name now, alongside her story, with everyone that I can. While I don’t do trigger warnings, I do recognize that having boundaries in spaces like this, with the subject matter I cover, is supportive. So I want to be transparently clear: the reason I chose to have this is as a paid publication is not to monetize off of Anarcha Westcott, the suffering she endured, or her story. Rather, this conversation speaks to the parallels of our lives and the pain that we both experienced. This is a recording where I express and explore my personal connection to her; so while I do go into her story as well as offer bits and pieces of historical gynaecological education — this really is more of an intimate telling of my own life and how it pertains to her. In many ways this recording serves as a requiem of emotion from me to Anarcha Westcott. A refusal to let her be forgotten. A remembrance of her suffering and sacrifice that directly and positively impact billions of women today. This is a space where I stand in vulnerability. Emotionally and physiologically relating to this woman who knows my story more than anyone else, even though she has been dead for over 150 years. My journey with childbirth was, in many way, unique — extreme and uncommon to say the least. Not just because I lost my son, but because of all the subtle details woven within the multi-day labour and the bodily dysfunction to follow. Over the past year I’ve connected with other women who have experienced stillbirth, each story as unique as the mother who tells it. And as supportive as connecting with these women has been for me, the woman that understands my journey the most lived almost 200 years ago; the recording you are about to listen to is an emotional telling of how we mirror one another. As I said prior, there are absolutely educational pieces woven into the words I share, however — this really is a remembering of Anarcha Westcott — the only woman I currently know of that has walked a parallel path from a physiological standpoint. Of course our paths are not identical, but the likeness is heartbreaking. If you are curious to know more about Anarcha Westcott, I encourage you to research her as much as you can. If you are wanting to learn more about the parallels between her and me, as well as my experience with traumatic childbirth and child-loss — this is the recording to take some intentional time with. I wish that I could sit at her feet… that we could be there for one another in a way that can only be done by someone who really knows the pain from a similar lived experience. I wish that I could be there for her and she could be there for me, and that we could talk to one another about our journeys and hold each other in a way that only those who have walked a similar path can. I see you Anarcha, and if you’re out there I hope you see me too. In reverence and remembrance, Emma

    2 min
  5. Grief is a portal

    15/04/2025

    Grief is a portal

    Today, we're talking about grief, not just as an emotion or a season of life, but as a portal — a gateway to profound transformation. Join me for an intimate chat where we not only discuss how grief impacts us, but we explore how we can choose to actively engage with our grief. portal /pôr′tl/ noun * A doorway, entrance, or gate, especially one that is large and imposing. * An entrance or a means of entrance. Oftentimes, deep grief and trauma can effect us so deeply so as to forge a severance in the timeline of our lives and even in who we are at our core. We no longer see our lives as a continuation from birth to death; rather we see our lives and even ourselves as life before *insert traumatic event* and life after *insert traumatic event*. Trauma, especially the kind that shatters your sense of safety or identity, can act like a fracture in time. It slices life into two distinct parts: before and after. The person you were before can feel like a stranger, or like a ghost you’re trying to reach but can’t quite touch. The narrative of your life no longer flows smoothly; it jumps, like a skipped track on a record. In this conversation, the invitation is to look at your grief not as something to fix or rush through, but as a master teacher. A sacred alchemist. We’ll explore how grief, when met with presence and honesty, can open us to more expansiveness and empathy. This is not about bypassing the pain or romanticizing suffering. It's about demystifying these spiritual concepts and grounding them in real, lived experiences — weaving together the practical with the sacred. This recording discusses how the trials, tribulations, and traumas we may face can break us open entirely, offering us raw material to build something new. We explore the various types of portals we walk through, and the continuous invitations there may be to evolve. Together, we’ll lean into how grief can deepen our connection to life, refine our raison d'être (reason for being), and even expand our capacity to love. If you’re walking through loss or navigating sorrow, this episode is for you. If you’re on the other side of something hard, still finding meaning, this episode is also for you. Let’s step through the portal — together. Pour yourself a cup of tea, light a candle, and settle in for an exploration of Grief as the ultimate healer. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    53 min
  6. How can I hold both life & death in wholeness with reverence?

    20/03/2025

    How can I hold both life & death in wholeness with reverence?

    How can I learn to hold both life and death in my heart in a good yet grounded way? This is a question I’ve been asking myself since my son passed away in childbirth March 2024. — In this audio file you will find my ponderings surrounding birth and death in relationship to the time of The Spring Equinox. Gazing at the cedar trees, their branches catching the late winter rain drops, I sat down to record this for you. Sitting with nature and getting quiet, watching the subtle changes in the seasons, noticing the rocks, water, and trees… grounded philosophical teachings often come through for me; and I find myself learning from one of our greatest teachers: Mother Earth. Today I will share intimately about the balance between light and dark through the lens of Birth, Death, as well as offer reflections on the Buddhist teaching of ‘The Middle Way’. The words I share illuminate a perspective on stepping away from the very human experiences of polarization and bias, while intentionally (and imperfectly) moving towards a practice of holding all potentialities to the best of my/our ability. Alongside this, there will be glimpses of Floyd’s cremation story which happened to take place on the Spring Equinox a year ago in 2024; illustrating the theme of death amongst life and life amongst death. As the entire world sits in this sacred pause, the Equinox — be it Spring in the Northern hemisphere or Autumn in the southern — we are offered a moment to reflect on the symbols of balance in our world. For me, the one that comes to mind is the image of Yin & Yang; opposition and polarization being integral parts of the whole — for without one, the other cannot exist. May we all learn to reverently hold the light and the dark; birth and death; togetherness and separation; compassion and suffering. This is the medicine of the Equinox. The wholeness that is (perceived) contradiction. “Remember child that you are noble, for you come from the Stars, yet humble, for you are born from the Earth.” In reverence, Emma This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    48 min
  7. Do I advocate against freebirth?

    19/02/2025

    Do I advocate against freebirth?

    Since loosing my son in childbirth a year ago I have been asked so many questions — the most common being:“Do you advocate against freebirth?” After 3 days of labouring at home we transferred to the hospital where I continued to labour for 8 more hours. I spent the next two days on life support, in a coma fighting off a rare blood infection while the ICU doctors worked around the clock to bring my organs back to life. Over the past year I have been in the deepest and most humbling grief which has given me space to reflect on my birthing experience. I am not even close to being the woman I was, and my understandings of birth, life, and death have shifted dramatically. For the purposes of this recording I'm going to be sharing my thoughts and what I've learned so far. By no means are these statements of absolute truth; these are ponderings and musings and things that i've come to understand; as well as realizations and perspectives that i've gained over the last year. If you have any thoughts, ideas, or perspectives that you want to share that could be valuable, I encourage you to write in the comments. If you have any questions about birth, I welcome you to ask them here as well. The only way forward is through humble communication, respectful conversation and compassionate dialogue with a desire to understand one another is the way forward. Come sit in tea ceremony with me and join this intimate conversation. In reverence, Emma This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    1hr 10min
  8. A walk with Darkness & Death as the most holy Medicine Woman

    21/12/2024

    A walk with Darkness & Death as the most holy Medicine Woman

    Welcome to this recording that I’ve entitled: The Winter Solstice: A walk with darkness & death as the most holy Medicine WomanIntimate shares, musings, poetry, reflections from the past year on darkness and light as a mother in mourning. This year has been the ceremony I never wanted to sit in, sacred songs that sound more like sobs,mothering that feels more like mourning,and healing that looks more like humbling. The path of child-loss,my relationship with darkness,death,suffering, grief, pain, andthe coldhave all been my greatest teacher.A Medicine Woman,and Wisdom Keeper.The mother of death,sister of darkness,goddess of the cold. Not something to fear,run or turn away from,but something to embrace,to welcome, to love and befriend. In reverence, Emma THE VERSES, POEMS, & PIECES OF WRITING REFERENCED IN THIS RECORDING: 🤎Tao Te Ching: Verse 50Translation by: Stephen Mitchell The Master gives himself upto whatever the moment brings.He knows that he is going to die,and he has nothing left to hold on to:no illusions in his mind,no resistances in his body.He doesn’t think about his actions;they flow from the core of his being.He holds nothing back from life;therefore he is ready for death,as a man is ready for sleepafter a good days work. 🤎Befriending DarknessBy: Emma Cardinal… and suddenly I woke up,it was December.Whispers of winter caressed the air,silent footsteps echoed between naked trees,my gaze inward,body collapsed to the Earth,limp and humble.The mother of darkness approaches.“Death is here, my daughter,” December sings to me softly,blanketed by a cold embrace.“Wh-why?” I fret, “Why now? Why me?”quivering, shaking, moaning,from anything but the cold.“To be your friend.” she replies. 🤎Dancing with the Dark GoddessBy: Arlene Bailey Not all are called to walkthe edge between the worlds.For those who are, who dare to risk, magic awaits.Not easy wave-your-pretty-wand magic,but magic that is deep and rough,pulling and tugging at your very existence,plunging you into the deep, dark,murky waters of all feelingsfrom all times. Not all are called to dancewith the Dark Goddess,but for those who are,a day will come when travellingbetween the worlds of dark and light will be aprofoundly juicy journeyof depth-diving into theshadowy recesses in order to purify, mature and perfectthat which is the deepestof All mysteries…The soul of a woman. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com/subscribe

    23 min
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Women and our medicine; a podcast to remember the wisdom we carry in birth, death, and the sacred mysteries. ahummingbirdprayer.substack.com

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