What if real self-optimization started long before your morning routine—with sleep and your nervous system, and it even goes back to how you were born? Coach, therapist, and integral thinker Michael D. Ostrolenk joins host Pete Ferrari to break down a whole-human approach to growth: physiology, psychology, relationships, and environment—all working with you instead of against you. You’ll hear why sleep is the first domino, how to align mindset and nervous system (so you’re not white-knuckling your habits), the power of language and tone in relationships, why sitting in discomfort builds resilience, and what Michael learned training with Navy SEALs at SEALFit’s Kokoro camp. Episode Highlights: 03:04 – The “obnoxious 9-year-old” story: OCD, hair-pulling, rejecting a smoking psychiatrist, and discovering biofeedback, meditation, and martial arts. 10:14 – Why Michael makes every client—individuals, couples, executives—start by optimizing their physical system (sleep, food, movement, circadian rhythm). 13:59 – Growth vs. fixed mindset—and why mindset alone isn’t enough without an aligned nervous system and emotional body. 18:49 – The first / second / third-person model. 21:41 – The four pillars of his work. 32:37 – Why sleep is pillar #1: deep/REM, latency, devices, and simple sleep-hygiene experiments (blackout, eye masks, screens, supplements, binaural beats). 41:55 – The difference between repressing emotions and actually processing them—plus how unprocessed emotions come out sideways as illness or passive aggression. Takeaways: Better deep/REM sleep improves hormones, mood, decision-making, and your ability to show up with love and patience—for partners, kids, and teams. Affirmations and “growth mindset” fail if your body is braced, breathing shallow, and stuck in survival mode. Work cognition and breath, posture, and energy together. The way you talk to yourself and others—tone, volume, last word of the sentence—either builds connection or feels like an attack, even when your intentions are good. Your home, office, commute, and products (cleaners, skincare, fragrances) can quietly sabotage your health—even if you’re “doing everything right” with food and workouts. Sitting longer with discomfort—without running to distraction—lets you harvest the wisdom in your emotions instead of turning them into chronic stress or illness. Give yourself a short window to rant, feel, and fall apart… then shift into either a concrete action plan or active acceptance of what you can’t control. About the Guest: Michael D. Ostrolenk is a coach, therapist, and integrative thinker working at the crossroads of health optimization, human development, and nervous-system-based performance. A co-founder of Ken Wilber’s Integral Institute in the early 2000s, Michael has spent decades weaving together depth psychology, somatic work, martial arts, ancient healing traditions, and modern functional medicine. He has served on the board of the Health Medicine Forum, helping bridge conventional Western medicine with naturopathic, Ayurvedic, Chinese, Tibetan, and shamanic approaches. Michael is also a master coach with SEALFit / Unbeatable Mind, where he trained alongside Navy SEALs and helped develop mental toughness and team-building curricula. His work is grounded in four pillars: physiology, psychology, relationships, and environment—applied to real life in practical, measurable ways. Connect with Michael D. Ostrolenk Website & coaching: www.michaeldostrolenk.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mostrolenk/ X (Twitter): https://x.com/mostrolenk LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michaelostrolenkresiliencemastery/ This episode is brought to you by Jaca Rare Sugar. Jaca is a revolutionary rare sugar called allulose with 0 net carbs, 0 glycemic index (diabetic & keto friendly), and 90% fewer calories than sugar. Jaca tastes, cooks and bakes like old school sugar with none of the harmful effects.
