Unprocessed

Lia Avellino
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  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

We have access to more mental health information than at any other point in history, and yet anxiety & depression rates are growing. Mental health advice is tricking us into believing that we are self-improvement projects, which ironically is creating more disconnection as we hide our flaws to avoid judgment when we can't "work" our way out of our struggles. The truth is: we experience freedom by being honest about who we are, not changing who we are. I will be a therapist who risks something--revealing my least impressive sides to you, shifting the shame, and not fixing the problem.

  1. 4 days ago

    How Being a “Helpful” Partner Kills Desire In Your Relationship 

    I talk about a moment when my husband asked me for support and I said no. I said no to preserve my own desire for him, and to ensure he figured out his journey with his own tools, not my tools. In this episode, I put on my couples therapist hat and share personal experience about how not going into helper/parent mode keeps my marriage spicy and fun, and ultimately a relationship I want to be in. Helping sometimes leads others around us to atrophy and then we get mad about it, which hurts doesn't help the union. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  2. 15 July

    Is Healing Really Possible? A Dive Into My Genetics

    I recently did genetic testing and learned that some of what I thought were struggles that I thought were solely related to learned behaviors were written in my genetic code. Listen as I contemplate the line between working on ourselves to grow and accepting that there are some wounds that will never fully heal. The struggle is real, my fellow unprocessors!  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  3. 1 July

    Procrastination: Delaying Reality for Possibility

    We often think procrastination is about avoiding a task, when in reality it's about avoiding feelings associated with those tasks. In this episode, I explore how the more I care about something, the more something or someone is important to me, the bigger my urge to procrastinate is. Listen in to learn about why this is and what I am doing to address it. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  4. 24 June

    We Keep Ourselves From Evolving To Hold Onto People

    I reflect on a time when I used loyalty and dedication as a way to self-abandon. How I rebranded familiarity as authenticity to avoid leaving my “home” (the people and places most familiar) and how “homelessness” to find a home where everyone could be and no one had to leave themselves behind. In this episode I dig into why it’s hard to chose growth and why most of us ditch to return to what we know. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  5. 10 June

    Why we gossip and what it reveals/conceals

    This episode explores how gossip is actually the substitute for connection and why it feels both so good and so bad. I get into the ways that gossip historically allowed me to feel close to authority figures and also what it hid me from knowing. Don't miss this short, sweet and juicy endeavor into talking shit! This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  6. 3 June

    Allowing Yourself to Disappoint (Even The Important People and Things)

    In this week's episode I talk about how I did something disappointing to another person, how hard this was to do and the three things that enabled me to do it: looking at the relationship between my authentic side and who I purported to be, the reality about healthy people's ability to tolerate disappointment, and the relationship between desire and conflict. This is a juicy one that is for anyone who wants to live more in line with their wants instead of the shoulds. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  7. 20 May

    What Is The Reality In Your Fantasy?

    In this week's episode I explore my relationship to fantasy and how fantasy can be something that makes you feel alive or prevents you from living in reality. I share about how having a fantasy often gets layered with guilt or fear about what it means--as we let ourselves know our urges (sexual or angry in nature perhaps) can feel dystonic/misaligned with the version of ourselves that is more "pleasing" or less messy. Listen in for three questions you can ask yourself to get to what reality your fantasy may be attempting to que you into.  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

  8. 13 May

    Why does it take us to midlife to start doing what we want to do?

    In this week's episode I examine the trend of saying "I am done" working so hard, living for others, avoiding my wants, once we hit midlife. I explore the 3 reasons (hint: we believe we have to suffer before we can get permission to choose joy) why this might be and share about how I am approaching my wants at this life stage.  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

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About

We have access to more mental health information than at any other point in history, and yet anxiety & depression rates are growing. Mental health advice is tricking us into believing that we are self-improvement projects, which ironically is creating more disconnection as we hide our flaws to avoid judgment when we can't "work" our way out of our struggles. The truth is: we experience freedom by being honest about who we are, not changing who we are. I will be a therapist who risks something--revealing my least impressive sides to you, shifting the shame, and not fixing the problem.

Information

  • Creator
    Lia Avellino
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    62
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Lia Avellino
  • Show Website
    Unprocessed

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