Latter Day Struggles

Valerie Hamaker
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  • Mental Health
  • Updated twice weekly

The Latter Day Struggles Podcast addresses beliefs and issues within the LDS faith that are challenging to talk about but vital to discuss for those trying to navigate their relationship in or around the church. Valerie and her guests invite psychological maturity, theological health, and institutional integrity. 

  1. 7 hr ago

    463: Sunstone 2026: Cracking the Code of Mormon Polarization

    Send us a Positive Review! Join Val as her audience while she does a final run through on a topic that has come to be a passion project for her on Latter Day Struggles.  In short, what can we do as faith-expanding people in and around the LDS church to ease the polarization between the fiery fundamentalist Mormon and the fiery Ex-Mormon?   Oddly enough, these two "poles" exist as counterpoints to one another on the opposite extreme.  If one pole chooses a "third way" balance is disrupted, and growth becomes more likely.  We on the Mormon faith journey may not be able to impact all aspects on the extreme side of Mormon fundamentalism/ orthodoxy...but how we handle our own growth journeys CAN change a LOT.  Listen in and let us know what you think!  Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Sunstone Preview 01:26 Why Polarization Matters 05:20 The Growth Ladder Model 11:05 Healthy Mormon Fusion 14:55 Differentiation and Faith Crisis 19:55 Integration and Inclusion 26:54 When Growth Gets Stuck 27:56 Fixation in Orthodoxy 33:53 Chronic Differentiation Trap 45:58 Breaking the Polarization Dance 48:47 Processing Wisely in Crisis 58:57 Third Way Closing Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  2. 17 Aug

    461: Stories of Healing Live Event Musings (from Val!)

    Send us a Positive Review! Have you ever done something for the first time and feel that pit in your stomach as it approaches?  Well, here at Latter Day Struggles, pretty much EVERYTHING  that we do is a first!  And it always brings that insecure "what have I gotten myself into?" sensation!   This episode is Val's candid reflections about an evening shared with over a hundred "in person" and "streaming" loved ones who have experienced growth and healing with her.   A bottom line?  You might be experiencing growth and healing in some way through this podcast and platform.  But you are also giving this gift of healing to Val and Nathan Hamaker.  They thank you and love you.   Hoping you enjoy Val's thoughts on the gift that this healing community is to her.  Because of you.   Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Event Recap 01:06 Why Stories of Healing 04:25 Origin Story Artwork 06:08 Sharing Beyond the Room 08:19 Event Day Emotions 08:37 Three Audience Groups 13:04 Grief and Perspective Shift 16:56 Program Highlights and Readings 25:40 What It Meant to Me 29:24 Q&A Next Steps 34:24 Closing Gratitude Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  3. 10 Aug

    459: Exploring Family Challenges when LDS Young Adults Disaffiliate w/ Liz Macdonald AUDIOBOOK

    Send us a Positive Review! Lately there has been a lot of talk about the LDS disaffiliation crisis in the 21st century. Here at Latter Day Struggles we support open dialogue about what happening in our LDS homes and congregations.   Please enjoy this special "audiobook" addition of a Latter Day Struggles series unpacking some groundbreaking research done by therapist Liz Macdonald exploring common LDS family dynamics shared by young adults whose disaffiliation experiences were the most challenging.   We care about people all across the spectrum of faith in and around the LDS church.  Taking research like this seriously could profoundly reshape our community in healthy ways.  Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome 03:54 Meet Liz and The Study 11:48 Method and Study Limits 22:03 Four Key Findings Overview 28:00 Disconnected From Self 52:20 Fear-Based Theology and Parenting 01:02:38 Conditional Love and Worthiness 01:12:42 False Self and Hidden Struggles 01:22:32 One-Way Communication and Fear 01:31:17 Blaming Outside Influences 01:40:20 New Episode Research Overview 01:57:49 Purity Culture and Shame 02:08:05 Adult Development and Compassion 02:20:19 Fear of Selfhood 02:30:25 High Demand Religion 02:44:22 Research Recap 02:52:12 Eight Stages Walkthrough 03:04:59 Parents Threatened by Growth 03:19:13 Fundamentalism and Safety 03:27:20 From Identity to Intimacy 03:34:37 Recommendations and Repair 03:41:27 Closing and Resources Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  4. 3 Aug

    457: Prophet Worship Compassionately Explained

    Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Val digs into the concept of prophet worship [or any time humans hand over their discerning power to a formal authority figure] from the context of psychology and the “shadow”.  While we tend to talk about our “shadows” from the context of that which we are ashamed of, sometimes we actually disown our greatest divine attributes.  Tune in to this episode to learn why this happens and how to reintegrate our “golden shadows” back into our core identities.  This conversation is an extension of Episode 447, so go back and listen if this intrigues you! Does the idea of awakening your core identity or "True Self" resonate with you ? If so, jump onto a waitlist to join Valerie’s next healing group that focuses on the awakening of one’s True Self core identity.  This group is titled “Fundamentals of LDS Faith Crisis Healing” and the next group of this type begins spring of 2027! Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Setup  03:09 Traditional Shadow Basics  07:58 Golden Shadow Defined  09:27 Projection and Triggers  12:36 Golden Shadow Projection Example 17:07 How Outsourcing Happens 20:08 Official Carrier and the Cost of Imperfection  25:37 When Following the Prophet Doesn't Work  29:36 Reclaiming Discernment  32:22 Practicing and Giving Yourself Grace  35:52 Integration Not Overcorrecting  39:15 Closing Thoughts Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  5. 27 Jul

    455: How & Why the LDS Church is BOTH Booming & Bleeding out Members

    Send us a Positive Review! In this episode Valerie tackles a seemingly contradictory pair of claims:  The LDS church is experiencing record-breaking growth!  The LDS church is experiencing record-breaking defection!  Is one narrative simply not true?  Interestingly, the answer is no, both narratives are true. Join Val as she unpacks these seemingly contradictory claims & breaks down how these claims reflect specific kinds of data collection.  She also explores how these narratives are tracking two different demographics of people in different stages of faith and consciousness development. Valerie’s hope in episodes like this is to shine a light on normative human growth & development in the context of faith and to illustrate how the churches that do not understand or believe in stages of faith development only serve populations in [important but] earlier stages of growth & pathologize those in later stages, causing ever increasing levels of family fractures and institutional defection.  PS: to read more & see the data, pick up a copy of download the book Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church and What We Can Learn from Them by Jeff Strong, linked HERE. Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Series Setup 02:45 Two Conflicting Narratives 04:16 Record Baptisms Data 06:17 Disaffiliation Statistics 12:01 Both And Explanation 14:03 Three LDS Demographics 14:21 Active Core Strengths 17:58 Disaffiliated Core Growth 22:30 Never Fully Affiliated 26:11 Stages of Faith Framework 29:26 Attachment Stage Church Fit 31:02 Differentiation and Homelessness 41:44 Integration and Compassion 44:20 Closing Reflections Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  6. 20 Jul

    453: Listening & Learning: Why LDS Loved Ones Could Not Stay in the Church

    Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church & What We Can Learn from Them [Part III of III] In this final episode of this beautiful series featuring guest author Jeff Strong & his bestselling book Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church & What We Can Learn from Them, Val & Jeff cover four "culture imbalances" that thousands of disaffiliated LDS offered as reasons they could not grow in the context of the LDS church. Listen in to hear some sobering & important data that offers a more accurate narrative surrounding the current LDS dissafiliation crisis. As painful a this information might be for devout LDS loved ones, this information is vitally important. Can those who loved the church and want what is best for their faith- expanding families listen to their feedback and create safe harbor for those on unexpected faith journeys?  The only way our LDS homes and wards can become this kind of community is to listen, learn, and trust the words and experiences of those who often only leave because they feel that thriving spiritually is not possible if they stay. Jeff's book Torn linked HERE Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro 02:45 Why These Talks Matter 05:00 Unexpected Family Reversals 13:14 Why Culture Is Key 20:25 Imbalance One Who Belongs 28:53 Balancing Standards With Love 35:13 Transactional Faith Pitfalls 44:54 Map Not The Sea 50:57 Agency Versus Compliance 54:28 Trusting Individual Conscience 01:00:23 Pressure To Conform 01:03:15 Ubuntu And Closing Takeaways Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  7. 13 Jul

    451: A Changing Society is Starving for Religious Systems to Meet them Where they Are

    Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church & What We Can Learn from Them [Part II of III] In this fascinating episode, guest author Jeff Strong & Valerie tackle several key points that Jeff courageously and gently addresses in his bestselling book Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church & What We can Learn from Them. Today, Jeff & Val lay out several culture issues that are pressuring the need for churches to adapt-not because people are becoming less and less "spiritual"...but because evolution is an upward spiral and human beings entering new stages of faith development have different needs. If these needs are not acknowledged; or if they are vilified, shamed, or pathologized- they will go away. We are seeing this at record rates in the LDS church.  Listen in as Jeff and Valerie clarify not only why so many lifelong multi-generational Latter Day Saints are leaving--but also share how spiritual growth/ differientiation & community belonging need not be mutually exclusive. Jeff's book Torn linked HERE Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Book Setup 01:38 Recap and Survey Numbers 03:13 Seeing and Humility 10:12 Culture as Soil Metaphor 15:44 Acceptance and Faith Stages 25:19 Fear to Hope and Growth 29:18 Four Storms Shaping Belief 37:19 Culture Change and Margins 45:44 Diversity and Balanced Energy 51:05 Next Episode Preview and Closing Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

  8. 6 Jul

    449: Torn: A Book Written to Help Your Devout Loved One Understand You

    Send us a Positive Review! Series Title: Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church & What We Can Learn from Them [Part 1 of 3] In this three part series, Valerie is joined by Jeff Strong- friend, colleague, and author of the best-selling book Torn: Why People We Love are Leaving the Church & What We Can Learn from Them. In this opening episode, Jeff shares his personal experience as an LDS bishop and father at a crisis point in time when his missionary son disclosed that he was coming home and leaving the LDS church.  In this moment, Jeff felt that everything was falling apart & in his own valley of the shadow, he could not meet his son where he was in his own valley of the shadow. The following 13 years comprising hundreds of interviews with disaffiliating Latter-day Saints & heartfelt soul-searching about the true meaning of faith culminates in this book: a Love Letter to the Devout Latter-day Saint who has a loved one who has left the faith.  Please listen to this series & consider reading than then gifting Jeff's book to one of your loved ones who does not understand your spiritual journey. Together we can heal our community and build bridges of understanding & belonging. no matter where we are on the spectrum of faith. Jeff's book Torn linked HERE. Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome and Introductions 02:07 Why Jeff Wrote Torn 02:56 Faith Crisis Sparks Research 06:16 Years of Writing and Rewrites 07:32 Who the Book Is For 11:07 Upstream vs Downstream Trauma 13:48 A Devout Reader’s Reaction 17:06 Mixed Faith Marriage Pain Point 20:24 Disaffiliation Numbers and Studies 28:36 Counter Narratives on Growth 29:52 Growth vs Activity Metrics 32:07 Convert Baptisms and Disaffiliation 33:04 Two Truths in Church Life 35:59 Four Waves Overview 38:11 Why Waves Feel Sequential 40:50 Upstream vs Downstream Pushback 43:54 Stages of Faith Transition 47:37 Belonging Over Belief 51:31 Success Stories of Inclusion 55:58 Bar Mitzvah Closing Story 58:27 Wrap Up and Next Episode Support the show Join Our Healing From Patriarchy Support Group Support the show Listen, Share, Rate & Review EPISODES Friday Episodes Annual Access $89 Friday Episodes Monthly Access $10 Valerie’s Support & Processing Groups Gift a Scholarship Download Free Resources Visit our Website

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About

The Latter Day Struggles Podcast addresses beliefs and issues within the LDS faith that are challenging to talk about but vital to discuss for those trying to navigate their relationship in or around the church. Valerie and her guests invite psychological maturity, theological health, and institutional integrity. 

Information

  • Creator
    Valerie Hamaker
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    310
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Latter Day Struggles
  • Show Website
    Latter Day Struggles

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