Unprocessed

Lia Avellino
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  • Mental Health
  • Updated weekly

We have access to more mental health information than at any other point in history, and yet anxiety & depression rates are growing. Mental health advice is tricking us into believing that we are self-improvement projects, which ironically is creating more disconnection as we hide our flaws to avoid judgment when we can't "work" our way out of our struggles. The truth is: we experience freedom by being honest about who we are, not changing who we are. I will be a therapist who risks something--revealing my least impressive sides to you, shifting the shame, and not fixing the problem.

  1. 4 days ago

    Why we gossip and what it reveals/conceals

    This episode explores how gossip is actually the substitute for connection and why it feels both so good and so bad. I get into the ways that gossip historically allowed me to feel close to authority figures and also what it hid me from knowing. Don't miss this short, sweet and juicy endeavor into talking shit! This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    11 min

  2. 3 Jun

    Allowing Yourself to Disappoint (Even The Important People and Things)

    In this week's episode I talk about how I did something disappointing to another person, how hard this was to do and the three things that enabled me to do it: looking at the relationship between my authentic side and who I purported to be, the reality about healthy people's ability to tolerate disappointment, and the relationship between desire and conflict. This is a juicy one that is for anyone who wants to live more in line with their wants instead of the shoulds. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    16 min

  3. 20 May

    What Is The Reality In Your Fantasy?

    In this week's episode I explore my relationship to fantasy and how fantasy can be something that makes you feel alive or prevents you from living in reality. I share about how having a fantasy often gets layered with guilt or fear about what it means--as we let ourselves know our urges (sexual or angry in nature perhaps) can feel dystonic/misaligned with the version of ourselves that is more "pleasing" or less messy. Listen in for three questions you can ask yourself to get to what reality your fantasy may be attempting to que you into.  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    15 min

  4. 13 May

    Why does it take us to midlife to start doing what we want to do?

    In this week's episode I examine the trend of saying "I am done" working so hard, living for others, avoiding my wants, once we hit midlife. I explore the 3 reasons (hint: we believe we have to suffer before we can get permission to choose joy) why this might be and share about how I am approaching my wants at this life stage.  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    14 min

  5. 6 May

    The Difference Between Discipline and Compulsion

    This week I unpack the different texture of my relationship to discipline--an empowered commitment to my goals--and compulsion--an automatic behavior to alleviate anxiety. I share about how you can tell what your intention is by listening to the tone of voice in your head (hint: self-criticism and compulsion go hand in hand) and how to unearth what your compulsions are hiding. Whether its related to work, food, exercise, etc, this is one that has the potential to bring you some more peace with the way you are.  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    14 min

  6. 29 Apr

    The Courage To Say "I Don't Know"

    In this week's episode I talk about the pressure many of us feel to be a knower and my urge to cover up something I didn't know. I explore why I believe humans do this, how it relates to both identity, social cache and risking belonging, and my surprising finding that I trust people who admit that they don't know more than I do ones who always know. Could confidence be revealed in what we admit we are lost about, rather than in certainty?  This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    11 min

  7. 22 Apr

    Why You're In Denial

    This episode I talk about facing my denial, why I haven't and explain from a trauma-informed perspective how we compartmentalize some of our truths in order to exist, how this helps and also how it harms. I welcome the time it takes to move through pain, knowing it will take time, but not letting myself believe that this is a bad thing in a culture that prompts me to move fast. We'll get there, we'll get to the truth together, exhale. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    11 min

  8. 15 Apr

    If I Know Connection is “The Thing,” Why Is It So Hard For So Many of us?

    Every happiness report names connection as a healing agent, memes taut the promise of connected relationships, and yet people report a high level of isolation right now. In this episode, I share the interpersonal reasons why we don’t get the connection we want, what makes it so hard, and the uncommon ways I’ve addressed receiving and claiming connection in my own life. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health treatment, diagnosis, or therapy. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship. The views and opinions expressed are based on my lived personal and professional experience but are general in nature. Individual situations vary, and listeners are encouraged to seek appropriate professional support for their specific needs. By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are responsible for your own mental health decisions and actions. I am not responsible for any outcomes resulting from the use or misuse of information discussed on this podcast. The content of this podcast should not be relied upon as personalized mental health advice, crisis support, or a treatment plan. If you are experiencing distress or a mental health emergency, please contact a licensed mental health professional, local emergency services, or a crisis hotline in your area.

    14 min
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About

We have access to more mental health information than at any other point in history, and yet anxiety & depression rates are growing. Mental health advice is tricking us into believing that we are self-improvement projects, which ironically is creating more disconnection as we hide our flaws to avoid judgment when we can't "work" our way out of our struggles. The truth is: we experience freedom by being honest about who we are, not changing who we are. I will be a therapist who risks something--revealing my least impressive sides to you, shifting the shame, and not fixing the problem.

Information

  • Creator
    Lia Avellino
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    58
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Lia Avellino
  • Show Website
    Unprocessed

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