ManTalks Podcast Connor Beaton

Talking points: neurology, biology, trauma, mindset

This was one of the most informative episodes I've ever recorded. As expected of Mastin Kipp, an old friend and incredible coach. We covered everything nervous system—and how there may be what you might call a "unified theory of trauma". Wildly grateful for this one! Note: we had some audio trouble for the first bit, but it cleans up after minute 12!

(00:00:00) - Intro, and the fragmentation problem in therapy and coaching
(00:08:47) - Mastin’s take on trauma, and the role of the nervous system
(00:29:44) - Do men relate, store, and deal with trauma differently?
(00:37:11) - Where do you as a man begin working with trauma—and where you don’t
(00:49:13) - What if you’re worried it’ll mess with your productivity/relationship/abilities?
(00:56:11) - How to simply improve your baseline wellbeing

Mastin Kipp, life coach, entrepreneur, author and self-taught expert on the human mind who bridges the gap between therapy, coaching, and personal development. With over two decades of experience, he combines psychological research, neuroscience, evidence-backed concepts and practical tools to guide individuals in unlocking their full potential to live a life with passion and purpose. Through his international personal development company, Functional Life Coaching, Mastin has impacted over two million people in 100+ countries with his writing, online courses, seminars, and retreats.

Connect with Matt
-New Book: Reclaim Your Nervous System: https://www.amazon.com/Reclaim-Your-Nervous-System-Post-Traumatic/dp/1401979157
-Website: https://mastinkipp.com/
-Functional Life Coaching: https://mastinkipp.com/what-is-functional-life-coaching/
-Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastinkipp/
-Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastinkipp/
-YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/mastinkipp

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This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a shot; it could be what changes everything. Visit https://betterhelp.com/mantalks to get 10% off your first month.
Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/
Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship
Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. 
Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google 
Podcasts | Spotify
For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter
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Talking points: fatherhood, mindset, perfectionism

To many of you, I'm still pretty new to the dad game, but it's honestly boggled my mind how much being one has changed my life and perspective on things. These are just a few of the things I've learned—or you could say my son has taught me.

00:00:00) - Intro, and number one: masculinity is modeled
(00:07:51) - “I would die for my kids, but I won’t live my life for them”
(00:10:21) - Your anger as a man is necessary. Your aggression is not.
(00:13:48) - Structure and limitation actually give you freedom
(00:16:27) - The aim is not perfection, the aim is progress

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This episode was brought to you by Mando. Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @shop.mando and get $5 off your Starter Pack (that’s over 40% off) with promo code MANTALKS. Head to https://shopmando.com #mandopod
Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/
Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship
Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. 
Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google 
Podcasts | Spotify
For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: transitioning, parents, resistance

Sometimes in life, we feel stuck, and that can happen even after you've done "the work" and developed a deeper understanding of how your past shaped your present. My anon guest this week (like many of us) has trouble feeling feelings. Together, we dig a little into where that comes from and why.

(00:00:00) - Intro and what it was like growing up
(00:09:23) - “It’s hard for me to feel the hurt”
(00:14:21) - What transitioning was like, and how we can honor both our parents and ourselves
(00:23:55) - Connecting with grief
(00:32:25) - It’s sometimes more about claiming what it was we wanted

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This episode was brought to you by Cuts Clothing. Embrace the summer state of mind. Head to https://www.cutsclothing.com and use promo code MANTALKS to get 20% off your order.

This episode was also brought to you by BetterHelp. If you're thinking of talking to someone, I encourage you to give it a try. Visit https://betterhelp.com/mantalks and you'll get 10% off your first month.

Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/
Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship
Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. 
Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify
For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: truth, social media, relationships, men, culture

Phew! Mark and I covered about a million things this episode, but that's what happens when you've been friends for over a decade. There's an overarching theme though: getting caught up in narratives, and how that actually fractures our ability to stay relational and kind to people. Dig in for this very wide-ranging conversation.

Editor's note: while Adderall (dextroamphetamine) has some molecular similarity with methamphetamine, they are not the same. The attached methyl group—the "meth" part—lets the compound cross the blood-brain barrier very easily, last longer, and amps up how addictive it is. The "dextro" means the compound is arranged in a specific way so much lower doses can be used.

(00:00:00) - Why men a seen as the problem in our current society, and how social media plays into that narrative
(00:14:42) - Balancing our perception of what men and women each bring to the table
(00:27:59) - How Mark approaches charged topics and binary thinking
(00:43:07) - Dehumanizing is easier thanks to social media, and how to stay relational
(00:58:06) - Acknowledging complexity, and intersubjective reality

Mark Groves is the founder of Create The Love. His own rock bottom – a relationship ending – sparked his lifelong journey to turn his mess into his message. Today, Mark is a human connection specialist, speaker, writer, motivator, creator, connector and collaborator. All. The. Things. As a bridge between the academic and the human, Mark invites people to explore the good, bad, downright ugly, and beautiful sides of connection.

Connect with Mark
-New book: Liberated Love: https://markgroves.com/elementor-landing-page-1696/
-Website: https://markgroves.com/
-Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/createthelove/

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This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Become your own soulmate, whether you’re looking for one or not. Visit BetterHelp.com/ManTalks today to get 10% off your first month.
Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/
Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship
Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. 
Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify
For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: mindset, social media, sex

Out of everything I've done, this is one of the simplest and most effective. To be clear, it's not about going abstinence-only or becoming a prude. It's about freeing mental bandwidth and take, taking ownership of my desires, and creating direction in my life. Dig in.

(00:00:00) - Intro, and why this isn’t about being a prude
(00:02:14) - The DBC: Digital Brain Cleanse. Step one, content
(00:06:17) - Step two: contacts
(00:08:06) - Last step: consciousness

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Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/
Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship
Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. 
Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify
For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Talking points: trauma

This was an honor. The word trauma gets thrown around a lot these days, so it's important to get back to basics and really sink into what's going on and why. After all, this is humanity we're talking about, and we're nothing if not complex. Peter is a legend in therapy circles for his groundbreaking work in somatic education and trauma work, so we dug into many of the different (and unusual) things something like trauma brings to the table. Both Peter and I encourage you to listen WITH someone!

(00:00:00) - Peter’s definition of trauma and how it affects the body
(00:07:27) - Peter demonstrates a somatic exercise to help release trauma
(00:13:14) - Do men and women experience and handle trauma differently?
(00:21:40) - On how trauma needs witnessing to heal, and Peter’s experience with active imagination 
(00:34:14) - Navigating the almost mystical side of healing
(00:39:45) - Why the tiger?
(00:43:27) - How can men work in a healthy way with anger, and how betrayal can impact how someone expresses themselves
(00:49:08) - The main tool to help process trauma

Peter A Levine, Ph.D., is the developer of Somatic Experiencing®, a naturalistic and neurobiological approach to healing trauma, which he has developed over the past 50 years. He holds a doctorate in Biophysics from UC Berkeley and a doctorate in Psychology from International University. He is the Founder and President of the Ergos Institute for Somatic Education, dedicated to Community Outreach and Post-Advanced Somatic Experiencing® Training, and the Founder and Advisor for Somatic Experiencing International. He has taught at the University of California, Berkeley; Mills College; Antioch University; the California Institute of Integral Studies; and the Santa Barbara Graduate Institute. His work has been taught to over 30,000 therapists in over 42 countries.
Dr. Levine is the author of several best-selling books on trauma, including Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma (published in over 29 languages); In an Unspoken Voice, How the Body Releases Trauma and Restores Goodness; and Trauma and Memory, Brain and Body in a Search for the Living Past.

Connect with Peter
-Website: https://www.somaticexperiencing.com/
-New book: An Autobiography of Trauma: https://books.innertraditions.com/autobiography-of-trauma/
-Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drpeteralevine/
-Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/peteralevinephd/

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This episode is brought to you by Henson Shaving. Genuinely love these guys and their product because they've made my shaving experience actually enjoyable! Go to https://hensonshaving.com/mantalks to get two years worth of free blades with your new razor.
Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/
Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship
Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. 
Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify
For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices