A Balancing Act: Navigating A Loved One's Memory Loss

Kelly A Bertenshaw, MA CCC SLP ECDCS
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When a loved one is diagnosed with Memory Loss or Dementia, family members can feel completely unprepared and overwhelmed. You're now trying to juggle managing your loved one's increasing need for care while also tending to your own family, career and life. It can truly feel like a balancing act. I'm Kelly Bertenshaw, a licensed Speech Language Pathologist and certified Dementia Care Specialist. I have worked with those affected by memory loss and their families for more than 20 years. I started this podcast to help you, the family members, as you navigate this journey. Your questions, comments and experiences will drive all our content. My goal is to provide you with proven strategies, relevant information and research, as well as actionable steps you can take today . Together, we'll find the answers. Because no one should walk this journey alone. RSSVERIFY

  1. A Turning Point: When "Fine At Home" No Longer Holds

    APR 1

    A Turning Point: When "Fine At Home" No Longer Holds

    In this episode, Kelly explores how a medical crisis, such as a fall or infection, often becomes the unexpected turning point when families first recognize the true extent of a loved one's dementia. From cognitive screening in the hospital to rehabilitation settings where the challenges become even more apparent, these moments, though emotionally overwhelming, can ultimately bring clarity and open the door to more realistic, proactive planning for the road ahead. Follow this episode with our "After the Diagnosis" episode: https://rss.com/podcasts/a-balancing-act/1796945/ FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT! https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss Resources: https://hign.org/consultgeri/try-this-series/recognition-dementia-hospitalized-older-adults https://www.ourparents.com/senior-health/avoiding-signs-of-dementia https://www.tuftsmedicine.org/about-us/news/recognizing-dementia-guide-early-symptoms-signs# The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  2. Dignity of Risk: Balancing Safety and Independence

    MAR 18

    Dignity of Risk: Balancing Safety and Independence

    In this episode, Kelly tackles the ethical tension caregivers face between keeping loved ones with dementia safe and preserving their independence and sense of self. Through real-life stories, she introduces the concept of the "right to risk" — the idea that autonomy and uncertainty are inseparable, even for vulnerable adults. Kelly encourages "negotiated risk": practical home and communcative adaptations as alternatives to simply eliminating activities. Good caregiving isn't about preventing every mistake, but helping someone continue to live a life that still feels like their own. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT! https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss RESOURCES: https://www.a24direct.co.uk/blog/balancing-independence-with-safety-in-home-based-care-plans#:~:text=While%20promoting%20autonomy%20is%20essential,Communicating%20Effectively%20with%20Families https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-support/im-caring-person-living-dementia/providing-day-day-care/decision-making-respecting The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    16 min
  3. Radical Acceptance: Overcoming Denial of a Loved One's Dementia

    MAR 4

    Radical Acceptance: Overcoming Denial of a Loved One's Dementia

    In this episode, Kelly explores how families often fall into denial when a loved one begins to show signs of dementia. And sometimes, even after the formal diagnosis. Kelly emphasizes this isn't about shame, but understanding the causes of denial and the risks associated with postponing acceptance. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT! https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss RESOURCES: https://wellnessstrategiesgroup.com/2025/04/family-denial-of-dementia/ https://www.bridgesbyepoch.com/2019/06/17/dangers-denial-dementia-and-peacefulness-resolution-1560780615/ https://homecareassistancedayton.com/dementia-diagnosis-denial/ MAYO CLINIC SUPPORT GROUP: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/caregivers/ ALZHEIMER'S ASSOCIATION SUPPORT GROUPS: https://www.alz.org/help-support/community/support-groups The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  4. The Built-In Caregiver: Home

    FEB 18

    The Built-In Caregiver: Home

    Today's focus is on ways to capitalize on and modify the home environment to support a loved one with memory loss. Kelly walks listeners through thoughtful home modifications that can act as an additional caregiver by reducing cognitive demands on people living with dementia. The results show respect for the person with dementia while reducing frustration for both caregivers and their loved ones. By designing around dementia-related brain changes, homes can help preserve independence and safety while reducing caregiver burden. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT! https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss RESOURCES: Room-by-Room Guide for Caregivers https://alzfdn.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/The-Apartment-Guide-web.pdf 10 Ways to Home Safety https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/blog/10-ways-make-your-home-dementia-friendly The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  5. "No strangers in my house!"

    FEB 4

    "No strangers in my house!"

    For someone living with memory loss, life already feels less predictable. Control is slipping in quiet ways. And home may be the last place that still feels familiar. The last place where they feel like themselves. So when help enters the conversation, it can feel less like support and more like losing autonomy. That’s why pushing harder often backfires. In this episode, Kelly talks about introducing care gradually with familiarity, consistency, and choice. Because the wall doesn’t come down when it’s forced. It comes down when it’s no longer needed. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 Please consider a donation to support A BALANCING ACT! https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss RESOURCES: https://www.caregiver.org/resource/introducing-home-care-when-your-loved-one-says-no/ https://www.agingcare.com/articles/helping-seniors-adjust-to-new-caregiver-155012.htm https://arcadiahomecare.com/when-elderly-parent-refuses-in-home-care/ The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    12 min
  6. ENCORE EPISODE: "Is It Alzheimer's?"

    JAN 21

    ENCORE EPISODE: "Is It Alzheimer's?"

    Today, Kelly shares our most listened-to episode, "Is It Alzheimer's?". Aside from cancer, Alzheimer’s Disease is often regarded as one of the greatest fears for many individuals. In fact, when people begin to experience memory lapses, they often jump to the conclusion that it might be Alzheimer’s. However, the disease encompasses much more than just memory problems. In this episode, Kelly will replace fear with facts and offer steps you can take now to clear up any misconceptions. Our Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61559433999543 If you care to make a donation to our podcast, please go to https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss Thank You! Resources: Early Signs of Alzheimer's: https://www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/10_signs Stages of Alzheimer's: https://www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/stages Assessments for Alzheimer's: https://www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/diagnosis/medical_tests The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    12 min
  7. Navigating Denial: When A Loved One Struggles With Reality

    JAN 7

    Navigating Denial: When A Loved One Struggles With Reality

    Today’s episode explores one of the most tender, and often misunderstood, parts of dementia care: denial. Kelly will talk about why denial shows up, why it isn’t always stubbornness, and how fear, identity, and self-protection play a role. She'll also offer ways to start compassionate conversations, how to respond when others don’t see the problem, and what to do when denial becomes unsafe — without damaging trust or dignity. If you’ve ever heard the words, “I’m fine, nothing is wrong,” and felt stuck between worry and love… this episode is for you. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please, message Kelly your questions, stories or comments! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT! https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss RESOURCES: https://www.everydayhealth.com/alzheimers-disease/how-talk-loved-about-signs-alzheimers-disease/ https://www.askelbi.com/post/when-your-parent-is-in-denial-about-dementia-how-to-navigate-this-difficult-conversation-with-compassion The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    16 min
  8. A HOLIDAY MESSAGE

    2025-12-17

    A HOLIDAY MESSAGE

    As this year comes to a close, I just want to take a moment to thank you for being here. Whether you’re listening while driving, folding laundry, sitting quietly after a long day, or taking a much-needed pause—you matter, and I’m really glad you found your way to this space. The holidays can bring warmth and connection, but they can also bring grief, stress, complicated family dynamics, and reminders of how much has changed when memory loss is part of your life. If this season feels heavy for you, please know—you’re not doing it wrong. You’re responding to something hard with love, and that takes courage. My hope is that, wherever you are right now, you can offer yourself a little grace. Connection doesn’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. Presence doesn’t have to look the way it used to. And love doesn’t disappear just because things are different. Thank you for trusting me with your time, your stories, and your hearts this year. It’s truly a privilege to walk alongside you in this journey. From my heart to yours, I’m wishing you moments of peace, comfort, and gentle connection this holiday season. And always—remember, no one should walk this journey alone. -Kelly

    2 min
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About

When a loved one is diagnosed with Memory Loss or Dementia, family members can feel completely unprepared and overwhelmed. You're now trying to juggle managing your loved one's increasing need for care while also tending to your own family, career and life. It can truly feel like a balancing act. I'm Kelly Bertenshaw, a licensed Speech Language Pathologist and certified Dementia Care Specialist. I have worked with those affected by memory loss and their families for more than 20 years. I started this podcast to help you, the family members, as you navigate this journey. Your questions, comments and experiences will drive all our content. My goal is to provide you with proven strategies, relevant information and research, as well as actionable steps you can take today . Together, we'll find the answers. Because no one should walk this journey alone. RSSVERIFY

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