Feminist Wellness

Béa Victoria Albina
  • 4.9 (112)
  • Alternative Health
  • Updated Weekly

You weren't born anxious, depleted, and second-guessing yourself. You were taught to be. The Feminist Wellness podcast is where nervous system science meets the truth nobody wants to say out loud: most of what you think is "self-care" is just performing wellness while your body stays stuck in survival mode. Host Béa Victoria Albina - NP, life coach, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner - breaks down the codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits that keep you trapped in what she calls Emotional Outsourcing™: constantly looking outside yourself for permission, validation, and proof that you're enough. This isn't another show about bubble baths and boundaries. It's about understanding why your body says yes when you mean no, why rest feels impossible, and how to stop treating your own needs like an inconvenience. If you're done white-knuckling your way through life, performing okayness while feeling like you're constantly failing some invisible test, this show will help you see what's actually happening - and what becomes possible when you stop abandoning yourself to please everyone else. New episodes weekly. Start anywhere.

  1. 5 hrs ago

    People Pleasing: What Keeping Others Happy Costs You

    #393: People pleasing can look like compassion, generosity, and care, but what happens when it comes at the cost of your own needs? This week, I dive into why people pleasing happens, how it becomes a pattern that shapes our relationships and sense of self, and why it can leave us feeling disconnected, resentful, and overwhelmed. I explore how these habits were often brilliant survival strategies that helped us get our needs met, while also showing how they can create challenges for us as adults. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/393 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

  2. 2d ago ·  Bonus

    How to Stop People Pleasing Habits + Nervous System Healing for CPTSD

    Tenderoni Hotline #41: If you know you’re a people pleaser but cannot seem to stop, this episode is for you. In this Tenderoni Hotline, I answer two listener questions that go straight to the heart of emotional outsourcing and nervous system healing. First: “I know I’m a people pleaser. How do I stop?” We explore why people pleasing is not a personality flaw or lack of boundaries. It is a nervous system adaptation. When connection felt conditional, your body learned to scan, adjust, perform, and prioritize others to stay safe. That strategy was brilliant. And now it may be exhausting. Then we move into a second question from a listener with CPTSD who shared that words like safe, belonging, and worthy feel abstract or unreachable in their body. If that resonates, you are not alone. Nervous systems do not organize around concepts. They organize around lived experience. So we unpack what “safe enough” actually means in relational terms, how belonging often gets confused with self-erasure, and why worth is less about self-esteem and more about non-abandonment. This work is not about forcing calm or becoming unbothered. It is about learning to stay with yourself when tension arises. It is about building safety from the inside out so you no longer have to abandon yourself to stay connected. Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.com Learn more about my courses and apply here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/courses Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en

  3. Aug 20

    Ritual vs. Routine: Why Meaning Matters More Than Productivity

    #392: Have you ever wondered why routines feel impossible to maintain, even when you know they’re supposed to help you? What if the problem isn’t your discipline, motivation, or ability to be consistent, but the way you’ve been taught to structure your life? This week, I explore the difference between ritual vs. routine and why ritual may be a more supportive framework for brains and nervous systems that don’t thrive on rigid repetition. We dive into how routines became tied to productivity and performance, while rituals help us mark time, create meaning, and reconnect with ourselves. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/392 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

  4. Aug 13

    How to Stop Self-Abandoning Without Becoming a Jerk

    #391: This week, I explore the question so many of us struggle with: how do we stop overextending ourselves and self-abandoning… without losing the parts of ourselves that genuinely love supporting others? Tune in this week to learn how to recognize when you’re giving from a place of genuine care versus fear, obligation, or a need to prove your worth. I’ll guide you through understanding how your nervous system drives people-pleasing patterns, how resentment can be a clue that you’ve crossed your own boundaries, and how setting limits can actually be one of the most loving things you do for yourself and your relationships. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/391 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

  5. Aug 11 ·  Bonus

    Are You Ready for Real Love If You're Still Healing + Why focusing on yourself is not selfishness

    Tenderoni Hotline #40: Hello my love, and welcome back to the Tender Hotline, the soft and spacious corner of the Feminist Wellness Podcast where we explore your most intimate and layered questions about healing, nervous system care, and reclaiming your self-trust. In this episode, we’re diving into three powerful questions that so many emotionally outsourced folks grapple with: Do I have to fully love myself before I’m ready for real love? How do I know if I’m truly healing or just coping while everything stays the same? And is focusing on myself while the world feels like it’s falling apart actually selfish? Together, we unpack the myth that healing has to happen in isolation. You’ll hear why real love isn’t reserved for the “fully healed,” and how our capacity for connection grows not in perfection, but in proximity and presence. We also explore how nervous system regulation can sometimes turn into a strategy for tolerating the intolerable, and how to shift from performative calm to embodied clarity and action. We talk about how emotional outsourcing, or looking to others for your sense of safety, belonging, and worth, distorts love and keeps you stuck in survival mode. And we name the ways that focusing on your own healing and self-connection is not selfish, but a radical act of reclamation that serves both you and the collective. So my love, go ahead and grab your softest blanket, pour something warm and grounding, and settle in. I’m so glad you’re here. Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.com Learn more about Anchored and join the waitlist here: https://www.beatrizalbina.com/anchored Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

  6. Aug 6

    When Helping Hurts: Codependent Habits in the Healing Professions

    #390: Have you always been the person who knows how to help? The one who notices everyone else’s needs, steps in quickly, and feels responsible for making things better? In this episode, I explore why so many people in healing professions struggle with exhaustion, over-functioning, and self-abandonment. We look at how becoming “the helper” often starts long before your career, and how those early survival strategies can follow you into your work as a nurse, therapist, teacher, coach, social worker, or other caring professional. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/390 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

  7. Jul 30

    Failure Is Your Best Friend: How to Learn, Grow, and Keep Going

    #389: Have you ever felt like failure defines you? Like missing a goal, making a mistake, or falling short is proof that you’re broken or incapable? In this episode, I explore what failure really is and how our interpretation of it shapes whether we get stuck or grow. Drawing on my own experiences, from life coaching to ceramics, I explore how the stories we tell ourselves after failure can either trap us or propel us forward. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://beatrizalbina.com/389 Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

  8. Jul 28 ·  Bonus

    Why You Feel Off After Talking to Your Mom + Why You Pull Your Hair Without Realizing + Why You Can’t Stay Present

    Tenderoni Hotline #39: Hello my love, and welcome back to the Tenderoni Hotline, our soft and spacious corner of the Feminist Wellness Podcast where we explore your most tender questions about healing, nervous system care, and returning home to yourself. In today’s episode, we’re diving into three powerful questions that illuminate just how deeply our nervous systems are wired to protect us, even when those protections feel confusing or frustrating. First, why do I feel anxious and disoriented after talking to my mom, even when the conversation seemed “fine”? We’ll explore how old relational patterns, emotional labor, and unspoken survival strategies can leave your body braced and buzzing long after you hang up. Next, we unpack what’s really going on when you pull your hair without realizing it. If you’ve ever felt ashamed about this, please know you are not broken. You’ll learn how body-focused behaviors like hair pulling can be unconscious attempts to regulate or ground when your system doesn’t have other tools. Finally, we explore what it means to be physically present, but mentally checked out. If you’ve felt like you’re watching your life from a distance or constantly lagging behind real time, this conversation on dissociation and functional freeze will help you understand why, and what you can do about it. You’ll walk away with insight, compassion, and nervous-system-centered practices to support your healing from the inside out. Got a question for the Tenderoni Hotline? Send it to me at: podcast@beatrizalbina.com Order your copy of End Emotional Outsourcing here: https://beatrizalbina.com/book/ Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp/?hl=en Mentioned in this episode: Join The Shift today! You cancel plans with yourself the moment someone else needs something. You say yes when everything in you means no. You have watched yourself do it and been genuinely bewildered. The Shift is 12 weeks of structured somatic practice built around the three needs at the root of every Emotional Outsourcing pattern: safety, worth, and belonging. The same foundational methodology as Anchored, structured entirely around your own life. Check it out here: https://feminist-wellness.captivate.fm/theshift The Shift

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4.9
out of 5
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About

You weren't born anxious, depleted, and second-guessing yourself. You were taught to be. The Feminist Wellness podcast is where nervous system science meets the truth nobody wants to say out loud: most of what you think is "self-care" is just performing wellness while your body stays stuck in survival mode. Host Béa Victoria Albina - NP, life coach, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner - breaks down the codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits that keep you trapped in what she calls Emotional Outsourcing™: constantly looking outside yourself for permission, validation, and proof that you're enough. This isn't another show about bubble baths and boundaries. It's about understanding why your body says yes when you mean no, why rest feels impossible, and how to stop treating your own needs like an inconvenience. If you're done white-knuckling your way through life, performing okayness while feeling like you're constantly failing some invisible test, this show will help you see what's actually happening - and what becomes possible when you stop abandoning yourself to please everyone else. New episodes weekly. Start anywhere.

Information

  • Creator
    Béa Victoria Albina
  • Years Active
    2019 - 2026
  • Episodes
    452
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2025 Béa Victoria Albina All Rights Reserved
  • Show Website
    Feminist Wellness

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