Getting Reflective - a podcast about unlearning

Lindsay Bindman
  • 4.2 (5)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT

People aren't born with prejudice. They learn it. A lot of what we’re taught growing up, either through our schooling, the media, or simply wider society, is harmful. This podcast explores the concept of "unlearning" through interviews with inspiring leaders and asks: what can we replace these harmful ideologies with? Ultimately this is a podcast about hope, self-improvement, and human connection. Learn more on the website: www.gettingreflective.com

  1. FEB 6

    Can you stay friends with your ex? Lindsay interviews her ex boyfriend, Taylar Mallo

    When most people think about breakups, they think: heartbreak, distance, and the quiet fading of someone who once meant everything. But what if that doesn’t have to be the case? What if love, instead of disappearing, could just... change? In this episode ofGetting Reflective, I’m sitting down with my ex, Taylar Mallo (he/him), to ask the question:Can you stay friends with your ex? Taylar isn’t just an old partner—he was the originalGetting Reflective listener, which definitely feels like a full-circle moment. We’re peeling back the layers of our relationship, from what drew us together to what ultimately led us to end our romantic partnership, and—maybe most importantly—how we found our way back to each other as friends. A lot of people would say it’s impossible to stay friends with an ex, but we’re here to challenge that idea. We talk about the work it takes, the emotional intelligence required, and the unexpected bumps along the way—like what happens when your ex starts dating someone new (spoiler: that someone is Dr. Sawyer Phinney). But at its core, this episode is about unlearning what we think relationshipsshould look like and embracing the ways they can evolve.  You can find Taylar and his music via his instagram: @taylarmallo  —  My music is written and recorded by the Kingston High All Stars, in Wellington, New Zealand.  My graphics, website, and illustrations are designed and maintained by MaggsyMayCo in Waterloo, Ontario.

    1h 30m

  2. FEB 1

    The cost of conformity: SOGICE, pastoral harm, and queer resistance - Lindsay interviews Willow Sipling

    Willow Sipling (she/they) is a public policy sociologist who generates research and writing on social phenomena in the realm of labor, ethics, sociology of religion, and more. Willow has experience in higher education, HR, communications, and technology. Willow earned two Master’s degrees in humanities and is a sociology PhD student at Western Michigan University.  In this episode, Willow and I dive into SOGICE, which stands for sexual orientation and gender identity change efforts. So, using frame analysis, we look at how while conversation therapy is one of the most extreme forms of SOGICE, SOGICE can also at times be less overt.  An attempt of any kind to make somebody stop being gay; stop being queer; stop being themselves, is SOGICE. And these subtle forms of SOGICE can result in significant harm, too. Willow and I do touch on some of the more violent forms of SOGICE, so if this could be triggering to you, you may wish to skip those parts.  Willow is funny, engaging, and highly informed. I hope you enjoy the learning and unlearning process.    You can find Willow online:  Substack: spotlightonsociety.com Bluesky: @willowwillowwillow.bsky.social willowsipling.com —  My music is written and recoded by the Kingston High All Stars, in Wellington, NZ.  My graphics, website, and illustrations are designed and maintained by MaggsyMayCo, in Waterloo Ontario.

    1h 23m

  3. JAN 16

    It’s not you, it’s society: language, shame, and disability justice - Lindsay interviews Alicia Ciocca

    Alicia Ciocca (she/her/ella), is white and Latina, with Puerto Rican and Italian heritage. Alicia has been an educator in the NYC Department of Education for over 10 years, teaching students with disabilities.  Recently, she left to start her own inclusive education coaching practice to bring Disabilities Studies in Education into the classroom. Alicia focuses on embedding disability identity, history, and culture into curricula, and fostering environments where children experience joy, pride in their identities, and success in learning through educator development and systems level change.  In this episode, Alicia shares about the history of disability rights and disability justice, which requires a shift from thinking about disability as a problem with an individual, to a more informed understanding that society has not historically been built with disabled, or neurodivergent folks in mind. The issue is a problem with our spaces, mindsets, and with society more broadly. Not a problem with disabled people. Throughout the episode, we talk about access, inclusivity, and equity, through an intersectional lens. Alicia aptly points out that if we don’t have supportive, inclusive ways to talk about disability, then a culture of shame is created.  Language conveys power, but how we use language also creates possibility. How we use language in our day-to-day lives creates the conditions, cultures, and world we want to live in.  If we care about the people in our lives, our families, our communities, who share different identities, and want to be together, then that means uplifting the perspectives of Disabled and Neurodivergent folks and thinking about how to make our spaces inclusive. Resources that Alicia recommends:  , edited by Alice Wong, as well as her The 10 Principles of Disability Justice (as outlined by  ), and their Disability Justice primer,  Emily Ladau’s book, You can find Alicia at her website: https://www.aliciaciocca.com —  My music is written and recorded by the Kingston High All Stars in Wellington, New Zealand.  My graphics, illustrations, and website are designed and maintained by MaggsyMayCo, in Waterloo, Ontario.

    51 min

  4. 2024-12-20 · BONUS

    Happy holidays & a look back at season 1

    Take a look back at season 1 in this short and sweet holiday episode.

    30 min

  5. 2024-12-10

    Allyship in action: navigating gender identity, equity, and socioeconomics – Lindsay interviews Dr. Sawyer Phinney (season 1 finale)

    Dr. Sawyer Phinney (he/him) is a Senior Labour Economist for the Government of Alberta. Sawyer has a Master's of Political Economy from Carlton University, and a PHD in Human Geography from the University of Manchester.  Sawyer is also deeply involved in advocacy work around trans rights and access to gender affirming care. From his early years grappling with societal expectations of gender to his powerful journey of unlearning the binary, Sawyer shares how transitioning has deepened his understanding of himself and the world around him, which included reflections on how to build emotionally aware and supportive communities that promote healthier masculinity. On the career front, we dive into his work in economic geography, including fieldwork in the United States, working to understand how race shaped Detroit’s austerity politics after the 2008 mortgage crisis, revealing that Black residents were unfairly blamed for the city’s bankruptcy, and austerity measures, like water shut-offs, disproportionately harmed poor, racialized communities. His stories illuminate the link between economic analysis, and grassroots storytelling. Sawyer’s journey is one of courage, compassion, curiosity, and reflection. I couldn’t have imagined a better conversation for my season 1 finale, as together we celebrate unlearning as a lifelong commitment. -- My music is written and recorded by the Kingston High All Stars, in Wellington New Zealand. My graphics, website, and illustrations are done by MaggsyMayCo in Waterloo, Ontario.

    1h 10m

  6. 2024-11-24

    Lessons in love from a non-monogamist – Lindsay interviews Lauren Hayes

    Lauren Hayes (she/her) is a relationship coach in Salt Lake City, Utah, specializing in supporting ethically non-monogomous couples, including swingers, and the ENM-curious. Lauren shares about her own experience, opening her marriage six years ago, and how this inspired her to begin helping others wanting to do the same.  Lauren and I discussed the things we need to have healthy, successful relationships - trust, commitment, and open communication, and reflected on how those are actually quite similar across both monogamous and non-monogamous relationships. Lauren helps us to understand where some of the stigma towards ethical non-monogamy may come from and as always, we discover that the way to avoid letting bias and judgement guide us, is to stay curious.  Lauren’s book, For Better or Worse: 7 Essential Life & Love Lessons from a Non-Monogamist is available for purchase! Find out more about her coaching, resources, and upcoming book at the website below.  https://www.swinginglifestylecoach.com You can follow Lauren on instagram @swinginglifestylecoach  You can listen to Lauren’s podcast here -- My music is written and recorded by the Kingston High All Stars in Wellington, New Zealand.  My graphics, website, and illustrations are done by MaggsyMayCo in Waterloo, Ontario.

    57 min

  7. 2024-11-16

    Living authentically: from transition to transformation – Lindsay interviews Dr. Amethysta Herrick

    Dr. Amethysta Herrick (she/her) is an exquisitely smart and funny transgender woman from Colorado. Ami has been a geneticist, chemist, and software engineer but now dedicates her time to challenging the notion that identity and gender are exclusive to the LGBTQ+ community. Through the lens of her transgender experience, she uses analogies and storytelling to break down complex ideas about sex, identity, gender theory, and feminism, promoting the essential equality of all humans. Amethysta’s mission is: to make expressing authentic identity safe and accessible for everyone, creating a world where these deeply human experiences are understood and embraced by all. Ami also generally shares with us about how differently she is received post-transition, as she is now typically read as a cis woman, versus living 52 years as a man. We discuss how vital her perspective is in discussing the unconscious bias that people are often guided by in their daily interactions.  Ami also shares about her powerful experience of receiving gender affirming surgery in Thailand this year, and how incredibly safe, supported, and cared for she felt throughout her experience. This was particularly transformative in the context of how poorly people are cared for in the United States.  Please be advised that Ami and I do discuss serious mental health challenges, including the topic of suicide, though please know, this story has a very joyous ending.  I can’t wait for you to meet Amethysta in this episode. It’s a special one. Enjoy! https://www.amethysta.io https://genderidentityweekly.transistor.fm My music is written and recorded by the Kingston High All Stars in Wellington, New Zealand. My graphics, website, and illustrations are done by MaggsyMayCo in Waterloo Ontario.

    1h 23m

  8. 2024-11-10

    Social (in)justice and labour unions – Lindsay & Abdullah interview Leah

    In this episode, I switch up the format a little, as my wonderful friend, Abdullah Mushtaq (he/him) co-hosts this episode with me. Together, we interview Leah (she/her), an activist with strong roots organizing within communities and labour unions, both in Canada and the United States. We spoke about her earliest memories of social (in)justice, the modern realities of unions, trying to balance negotiating contracts vs campaigning for broader equity, and the process of unlearning the idea that it’s lazy to rest your mind and body. As you'll hear, Leah is an all around awesome human being and I'm so so grateful she joined us for this important conversation!  Enjoy! I loved having Abdullah as my co-host for this episode. He brights a rich perspective and lived experience that’s different to mine, and I truly think he makes the podcast even better. If you think Abdullah should co-host future episodes with me, let me know. I'm already sold.  - My music is written and recorded by the Kingston High All Stars in Wellington, New Zealand. My graphics and website are done by MaggsyMayCo in Waterloo, Ontario.

    1h 3m
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4.2
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

People aren't born with prejudice. They learn it. A lot of what we’re taught growing up, either through our schooling, the media, or simply wider society, is harmful. This podcast explores the concept of "unlearning" through interviews with inspiring leaders and asks: what can we replace these harmful ideologies with? Ultimately this is a podcast about hope, self-improvement, and human connection. Learn more on the website: www.gettingreflective.com

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