Dating and Desire Podcast

Bridgett Blood and Lauren Mathues

The Dating & Desire Podcast is a Christian dating and sexuality podcast for singles and dating adults who want more than rules or fear-based answers. Hosted by relationship coaches Bridgett Blood and Lauren Mathues, the show explores Christian dating, sexual desire, emotional safety, boundaries, and integrity. Through honest conversations with pastors, therapists, and relationship experts, we help you navigate physical boundaries and sexual formation with faith and self-trust. Because your desire is holy, your body is good, and your story matters.

  1. 2d ago

    EP.22 Is Masturbation Wrong for Christians? A Thoughtful Conversation on Discernment

    Bridgett Blood and Lauren Mathues step into one of the most tender and often misunderstood conversations in Christian sexuality: masturbation, self-pleasure, and how adults make embodied, faithful decisions. With warmth and nuance, they name the range of perspectives people often carry, from “always wrong” to “always empowering,” and invite listeners into a more honest conversation about story, Scripture, the Holy Spirit, and what it really looks like. The depth of this conversation comes from the way they refuse to separate theology from lived experience. Our bodies, histories, wounds, shame, curiosity, and longings are all present when we talk about sexuality. For some, this topic touches abuse, loneliness, purity culture, pornography, confusion, or fear. For others, it raises questions about freedom, agency, healing, and what it means to live with integrity. Bridgett and Lauren offer a framework that moves beyond rule-making and reaction. They talk about discernment, personal conviction, embodied awareness, the difference between pleasure and escape, and the importance of asking whether our practices are leading us toward connection or away from it. Their invitation is not to bypass God or the body, but to listen more deeply to both as part of formation and wholeness. What to pay attention to is the fruit of your choices. Are you becoming more connected to God, yourself, and others, or more hidden, isolated, and self-protective? Are you honoring your body with kindness, or using pleasure to avoid the risk of being known and cared for? These questions help create a path toward discernment, clarity, and a deeper trust in your own story. Watch this episode on YouTube Mentioned in this Episode Bridgett’s free guidebook, 19 Ways to Engage Sexual JoyPure Desire: Groups and Clinical care for unwanted sexual behavior and betrayal trauma for men and womenShe Recovery: women porn recovery resourcesTabbitha Westbrook: healthy sexuality after abuse If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need: 🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → Work with Lauren → Coming in July: The Mid-Summer Dating Reset→ ⁠⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step. 📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠ Have more questions? Email us at datinganddesirepodcast@gmail.com

    54 min
  2. Jun 16

    EP.21 What we are learning, loving, and a whole lot about kissing

    Bridgett and Lauren gather the threads from recent conversations with Dr. Anthony Bradley, Barb Hill, Dr. Andrew Bauman, Dr. Jenna Mountain, Jonathan Hernandez, Adam Young, and Dr. Tony. Across themes of men’s formation, emotional capacity, abstinence, shame, story, and embodied sexuality, they keep returning to what healthy love actually takes. The tension is honest: rules can feel safer than discernment, but they cannot do the deeper work of formation. Bridgett and Lauren name the body as a place of wisdom, not fear, where desire, hesitation, grief, attraction, and discomfort all offer meaningful information. Their invitation is toward integrity that is connected and whole. Physical closeness is not treated as a formula, but as something that should match trust, commitment, communication, and the relational reality being built. For dating and relationships, this becomes deeply practical. What to pay attention to is whether your body feels safe, whether your words can be honest, and whether connection is forming something good in both of you. The fruit is clarity, discernment, and growing trust in yourself. Watch this episode on YouTube Mentioned in this Episode Join Andrew Bauman's Man LandListen to Three Percent Podcast Heartbreak Albums Bridgett Mentioned: The Process by Judah & The LionNova by FalconIf something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need: 🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence.→ Work with Lauren → Coming in July: The Mid-Summer Dating Reset→ ⁠⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step. 📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠

    1h 9m
  3. Jun 9

    EP.20 Holistic Health for the Man You Want to Be with Dr. Tony Krohn

    Dr. Tony Krohn, chiropractor and men’s holistic health coach, brings a thoughtful and needed perspective on men, formation, health, and what actually prepares someone for love. He speaks to the pressure many men feel to become impressive on the outside while avoiding the deeper work of identity, community, healing, and embodied integrity. This conversation moves beyond appearances, apps, and external validation into what it really looks like to become ready for relationship. One of the central tensions is that growth can look good on the outside while still being driven by fear. We can read the books, work out, clean up our lives, and say we are “doing the work,” but still be trying to prove we are worthy of love. Tony names the deeper invitation: to let God form the places in us that are lonely, defended, insecure, or still reaching for validation, so our healing becomes honest rather than performative. His framework is rooted in wholeness: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health held together rather than separated into parts. The goal is not simply to get the girl, get married, or check the boxes. It is formation with integrity, where community can offer encouragement and correction, where the body is cared for, where the heart is not abandoned, and where connection becomes something we can actually receive and sustain. What to pay attention to is why you are doing what you are doing. Are you growing because you are afraid you are not enough, or because you want to live with greater clarity, love, and faithfulness? In dating and relationships, notice whether your desire for marriage is helping you become more whole or tempting you to perform. That kind of honesty creates space for discernment, deeper trust, and a more grounded relationship with yourself. Watch this episode on YouTube Connect with Dr. Tony InstagramThe Restored Man - Group ProgramDiscovery Call If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need: 🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → ⁠⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step. 📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠

    56 min
  4. Jun 2

    EP.19 Making Sense of Your Sexual Story with Adam Young

    Adam Young, licensed clinical social worker and author of Make Sense of Your Story, brings a compassionate and clarifying lens to why our past continues to shape how we date, desire, and attach. Rather than asking us to summarize our whole life from a distance, Adam invites us to pay attention to the particular memories, relational patterns, bodily responses, and places of pain that have formed us. For anyone longing for honest, connected love, this conversation helps name what it really looks like. There is a meaningful tension here: our bodies are telling the truth, but not always the whole truth about the present moment. Attraction, fear, shame, and longing are not random, and they are not problems to simply overcome. They are often invitations to listen with more kindness to what our lived experience has carried, so that we can respond with greater clarity instead of simply reenacting what feels familiar. Adam’s framework centers on the integrity of looking at our own story with compassion, not contempt. Healing is not a finish line we cross before we become ready for love, but an ongoing formation of how we relate to our heart, our body, our wounds, and our desire. The real question becomes whether we and the people we date are willing to keep looking, keep repairing, and keep moving toward wholeness together. What to pay attention to is not whether someone has a perfect story, but whether they can engage their story honestly. Can they stay present with emotion? Can they receive a small vulnerability with care? Can they notice a pattern without turning away or becoming cruel? These are the places where dating becomes discernment, where clarity deepens, and where self-trust has room to grow. Watch this episode on YouTube About Adam Young Adam Young is a therapist who focuses on trauma and abuse, the host of The Place We Find Ourselves podcast, and the author of Make Sense of Your Story: Why Engaging Your Past With Kindness Changes Everything. Adam is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) with a Master degree in Social Work (Virginia Commonwealth University) and Divinity (Emory University). He currently serves as a Fellow and Instructor at The Allender Center and lives in Fort Collins, CO, where he enjoys skiing, soccer, and mountain biking. Connect with Adam Website Instagram Adam's Book, Make Sense of Your StoryWant help applying this to your dating life? If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need: 🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → ⁠⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step. 📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠

    44 min
  5. May 26

    EP.18 The Night God Met Me in My Addiction with Jonathan Hernandez

    Jonathan Hernandez, certified Connections Codes Coach, specializing in porn recovery and men's emotional wellness, joins Bridgett and Lauren for an honest conversation about sexuality, shame, curiosity, and wholeness. Through his story with pornography, trauma, faith, and dating, he names what it looks like to pursue healing with integrity instead of fear. The tension is real: many of us learned to hide or manage sexual struggle instead of bringing it into connection. Jonathan offers a more embodied path, where our reactions, attractions, and shame can become places of honesty, not isolation. His invitation is not behavior control, but formation. Sexual wholeness begins when we get curious about what desire is connected to, where we disconnect, and how God meets us with kindness as we grow in clarity, trust, and integrity. What to pay attention to is when attraction shifts into urgency, fantasy, control, or the need to be chosen. In dating and relationships, those moments can become invitations to slow down, tell the truth, and move forward with discernment, clarity, and self-trust. Watch this episode on YouTube Connect with Jonathan WebsiteInstagramConnection Codes Coaches Want help applying this to your dating life? If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need: 🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → ⁠⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step. 📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠⁠Website⁠⁠

    1h 6m
  6. May 19

    EP.17 From Formulas to Formation: Abstinence, Sexual Fragility and Maturity with Dr. Jenna Mountain

    Bridgett and Lauren sit down with Dr. Jenna Mountain, a sex therapist and educator who works at the intersection of faith and sexuality, for a conversation that gently rewires how many of us were taught to think about abstinence. Jenna brings both clinical experience and a deep love for the church, and she does not shy away from the places it has gotten things wrong. Together, they explore what it means to make sexual choices from a place of conviction rather than control, and what healthy formation actually looks like. At the center of the conversation is a quiet but important distinction. A choice rooted in your own values feels different in your body than a rule handed to you by someone else. Jenna names the way purity culture often produced sexually fragile adults, people who learned to avoid their own desire rather than engage it with maturity. That fragility shows up later in dating, in marriage, in the way people relate to beauty, attraction, and their own embodied lives. The work, she says, is becoming someone who can stay connected to your body, your faith, and your discernment all at once. Her framework moves us from formulas to formation. Formulas tell you exactly what to do and promise a guaranteed outcome. Formation invites you into the slower, more honest work of knowing your convictions, understanding your own development, and choosing in alignment with what you actually believe. In this view, abstinence can absolutely be a healthy choice, but only when it is fully yours. The goal is integrity, wholeness, and the kind of sexual maturity that is not waiting on a wedding day to arrive. For anyone dating, this conversation reframes what real readiness looks like. What to pay attention to is whether your sexual choices are forming you into a fuller, more grounded person or quietly keeping you small. The invitation is to engage rather than avoid, to ask better questions of yourself and the people you date, and to build the kind of self-trust that holds steady whether you are single for another year or another decade. Move with clarity, trust your discernment, and let your convictions feel like your own. Watch this episode on YouTube Connect with Jenna Work with Jenna in either counseling or coachingJoin her email listInstagramTikTokFacebookWant help applying this to your dating life? If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need: 🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Website⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → ⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step. 📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Website⁠ christian dating podcast, faith and sexuality, purity culture, abstinence conversation, christian relationships, christian singles, dating advice, relationship formation, sexual ethics, body connection, desire and faith, self trust in dating, emotionally healthy dating, christian dating advice, intimacy conversations, self awareness in relationships, christian young adults, dating mindset, healing from purity culture, authentic faith, relationship growth, christian podcast

    1h 3m
  7. May 12

    EP.16 Good Friends and Full Honesty will Level Up Your Dating Life with Jamie Haigh & Blake Roberts (Three Percent Co)

    Bridgett and Lauren sit down with Jamie and Blake of the Three Percent Podcast, two therapists, friends, and husbands whose work centers on what it means to be a safe, embodied man. The conversation moves through male friendship, attachment, the difference between knowing your story and doing the work, and the quiet ways loneliness shapes how a person dates. It is a grounded, honest look at what healthy formation actually takes. **WARNING: THIS EPISODE CONTAINS A STORY ABOUT SEXUAL ABUSE* Bridgett opens with a phrase that becomes the through line of the conversation: eroticized loneliness. The ache of being unseen does not disappear when it goes unnamed. It travels into the body and shows up in dating, in sex, in the way a person reaches for a partner to carry what only community can hold. Jamie and Blake speak to this with the kind of clarity that comes from having lived it, naming the difference between social proximity and the experience of being known. Their framework rests on what they call the 3%, the small part of ourselves we keep hidden that quietly drives the rest. Real formation, they explain, is not finishing the work alone and then arriving polished into a relationship. It is the slower practice of integrity in connection, learning to bring your honest self forward, letting the people closest to you point you back to your person, and setting boundaries that draw someone in rather than push them out. Healing, they remind us, happens in relationship, not in preparation for it. For anyone dating, this conversation reorients what it means to be ready. Readiness is not the absence of wounds. It is the willingness to be honest about them and to keep choosing connection anyway. What to pay attention to is whether the people in your life are forming you toward wholeness or around it, and whether you are bringing your heart into your relationships or only your strategy. Trust what you are noticing. Move with clarity. Let yourself be known. Watch This Episode on YouTube Connect with the Three Percent Podcast Website: https://threepercentco.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/threepercent.co/ Join The Basement: https://threepercent.substack.com/ Connect with Blake: Website: blakerobertscounseling.com Substack Newsletter: https://blakeroberts.substack.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therapy.with.blake/ Connect with Jamie Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jamie.w.haigh/ Want help applying this to your dating life? If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need:  🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠⁠ 📓 ⁠⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Website⁠⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → ⁠⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step.  📔 Get the free guide ⁠⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ → ⁠⁠Website⁠ how loneliness affects dating, what is eroticized loneliness, how to be ready for a relationship, why men struggle with intimacy, healing in relationships not before them, the part of yourself you hide in dating, what healthy masculinity looks like in dating, Christian men and friendship, Three Percent Podcast, Jamie and Blake, male loneliness and dating, healthy masculinity Christian, men and emotional intimacy, integrity in connection, healing happens in relationship, Christian dating readiness, dating with integrity, Christian men and friendship, Dating and Desire podcast, Bridgett Blood, Lauren Mathues

    1h 3m
  8. May 5

    EP.15 Why "Don't Waste My Time" Is Hurting Your Dating Life

    Bridgett and Lauren sit down for an honest conversation about one of dating's most loaded phrases: "don't waste my time." They unpack where that posture comes from, why it often reveals more about our own fear than about a potential partner, and what it really looks like to date from a place of groundedness rather than self-protection. Underneath the urgency to know everything on date two is usually something tender. Maybe a fear of getting hurt, a belief that you only have so much of yourself to give, or a lingering message from purity culture that connection itself is a kind of loss. When we hand someone else the job of protecting our time, we quietly give away the discernment that was ours to carry all along. The invitation here is to take that responsibility back. Bridgett and Lauren talk about what it means to say yes to one hour, one coffee, one honest conversation without needing to know the ending. That kind of openness asks for real integrity and formation, a willingness to stay connected to yourself, trust your internal resource, and recognize when staying would require you to get small. Growth looks less like certainty and more like the steady work of choosing yourself and the other person well. For anyone dating, this is a reframe worth sitting with. What to pay attention to is the fear that tells you to pre-decide, the urge to rescue or shrink, and the moments your body is asking you to slow down. You are allowed to have needs. You are allowed to change your mind. And the more you practice showing up honestly, the more your own discernment, clarity, and self-trust become the compass you can actually follow.Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/Y_bj7WSe2Do Want help applying this to your dating life? If something in this episode resonated with you, here are two ways to go deeper depending on what you need:  🩷 Work with Bridgett You don’t need more rules. You need a deeper understanding of your sexual desire.If you still feel confused about how to navigate dating without shutting down or crossing your boundaries, Bridgett helps you build sexual self-trust and honor your values → ⁠ RECLAIM Cohort⁠ 📓 ⁠Free Guides and Ecourse⁠ → ⁠Instagram⁠ → ⁠Website⁠   💙 Work with Lauren If you’re feeling unsure what to do next— whether that’s meeting people, choosing who to pursue, or trusting your judgment in dating, Lauren helps you move forward with clarity and confidence. → ⁠Book a Dating Clarity Call⁠ We’ll look at your specific situation and map out your next step.  📔 Get the free guide ⁠Dating Apps Don’t Have to Be Confusing⁠ → ⁠Instagram⁠ → ⁠Website⁠

    54 min

About

The Dating & Desire Podcast is a Christian dating and sexuality podcast for singles and dating adults who want more than rules or fear-based answers. Hosted by relationship coaches Bridgett Blood and Lauren Mathues, the show explores Christian dating, sexual desire, emotional safety, boundaries, and integrity. Through honest conversations with pastors, therapists, and relationship experts, we help you navigate physical boundaries and sexual formation with faith and self-trust. Because your desire is holy, your body is good, and your story matters.

You Might Also Like