The Angsty Pod

Yoda Olinyk
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  • PERSONAL JOURNALS
  • UPDATED SEMIWEEKLY

For more than 2 decades, I have written in a diary almost every single day. And guess what? I saved them ALL. Each week, I will be reading from these archives and getting to know myself from the lens of my 10, 16, 25, and 36-year-old self. We'll explore big topics such as body image, queerness, divorce, addiction, mental health, and friendship. I'll read cringy poems and attempt to find compassion for the painful tenderness of my younger self. Join the drama of me and my guests as we explore our boy-crazy, closeted, angsty selves... one stupid page at a time.

  1. Episode 30 - Fraser Island Fling (Part 2)

    JAN 26

    Episode 30 - Fraser Island Fling (Part 2)

    It's 2010 and I've been in Australia for about a month and am finally settling into things. I'm still dying of homesickness but am eager to find a job and am already thinking of extending my stay in Oz. My friend Ian tells me I need to relax and come live with him in his van, and I consider it, but ditch him quickly for a local named Alan. Alan and I dive into a very passionate fling. The fling takes us on a disastrous trip to Fraser Island and our ending is as swift as our beginning. I travel up and down the coast from Yamba to Byron Bay to Brisbane and back again. I get food poisoning on an island and worry I might die. My friend and I are fighting constantly and the zoo makes me feel nothing but sadness.  I turn 22 and stay on the job hunt. I get my heart broken, stomped on, and spit out. I decide I want to make some changes.... and decide I'm going to fly West! All that and more in this DOOZY of an episode. 3 For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    1h 7m
  2. Episode 29 - Can Homesickness Kill You? (Part 1)

    JAN 5

    Episode 29 - Can Homesickness Kill You? (Part 1)

    I'm skipping ahead a bit here and taking you to 2009. Brokenhearted from my messy break up with Corey, I let myself fall into the arms of the friend of my best friend's boyfriend. Him and I try desperately (and unsuccessfully!) to fit a whole relationship into a few months because surprise! I'm flying to Australia and no one can stop me. Australia is the furthest I've ever traveled, and I am drowning in homesickness. So much so, I am having visions of the guy I left behind, and am rying myself to sleep while the other backpackers surf paradise around me. I write about 20K words in the first 48 hours and every single one of them spells 'anxious attachment.' One minute, I am fighting with my friend, the next I am making out with a Dutch guy on the beach, the next I am cooking for everyone in the hostel. Total whirlwind. Don't worry! I share how to properly make a Vegemite sandwich, chef-stylez. I also get a foot rub from Jamie Oliver's cousin (lol)! I am pounding 'goon,' which is a wine (if you can call it that!) that costs $11 for 4 liters!!  This episode certainly isn't a party, although there is a fair amount of that. I get caught stealing and hate myself so much that I almost decide to go home. Instead, I wander aimlessly up the East Coast and try to find myself. Join me in Bondi, Sydney, Byron Bay, and Yamba. 3 You might want to take a lorazepam for this one!!! For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    1h 11m

  3. 2025-12-21

    Interview with my Dad 3

    The long-awaited episode is here!! I finally had the chance to sit down and interview my Dad, Ron, for The Angsty Pod!  "Let's call it a journal, not a diary!" lol Dads... ammiright?!?! We sat down in my Dad's living room, mic between us, Dad sipping wine, me sipping Gingerale, and we talked for about four hours. We covered all kinds of topics, including the way his mother smelled, eating escargot, staying open to life's opportunities, writing practice, and much more.  In this episode, it's 1979, and my Dad, age 20, is backpacking through Europe. His mother, my grandmother, has recently died and he is living at home with his father, my Gido. It's the first time he's left the country, been on a plane, or rode in a taxi... and he does it all in the first page of this journal. He ultimately wanted to end up in India, to become a yogi and learn more about meditation, or, in his words, "I wanted to live in a cave and become a guru."  But the story takes a turn when he is "bamboozled" in Rome. He loses most of his money and the scam leaves him completely broken hearted. His shame over the incident, 45+ years later, is still profound.  "It was the most beautiful, incredible journey I've ever had in my life; the most adventurous, and I learned SO much... but there were so many other moments of pain and sadness and loneliness." We end this episode with a conversation about travel, and Dad even agreed to read some poems!  This is one of my favourite episodes, as well as a personal & career highlight for me. I know my Dad will appreciate you for listening, and I do too!! For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    1h 30m
  4. Episode 28 with Sarah Hanson

    2025-12-15

    Episode 28 with Sarah Hanson

    Join me as I chat with my pal and client, Sarah Hanson! Sarah (she/her) is a poet from Minneapolis, Minnesota. She is a truth teller, trauma survivor, and constant reinventor. Sarah's writing practice is "in bloom" and her first poetry collection will be out April 28th! In this episode, we talk about poetry, trusting yourself, and the importance of friendship. We exchange hilarious, heartbreaking stories of our youth, and Sarah generously reads several poems from her junior/senior year of high school, which we have given a 10/10 rating on the ANGST and tenderness scale. "I don't want to throw her away anymore," is now on a post-it on my altar. Thanks for that one, Sarah! To pre-order Sarah's collection, Conjuring the Hurricane, and for more info, head to www.sarahhansonwrites.com For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    1h 25m

  5. 2025-11-11

    Episode 27 - Big Romance?.... Or BIG Dysfunction?!?

    Content Note: This episode mentions self-harm and suicidal ideation. In this week's episode, I am falling in love and terrified of saying it out loud. I'm so terrified, I start inflicting physical and spiritual harm to myself and others. There's some tough stuff in this one but it was kindof cool to read back on how in love I truly was. There are so many elements of this journal that remind me of previous journals - it's a new year and a new guy, but I am still a classic avoidant! There is a certain violence in this episode that surprised me. Not only amoungst my friend group, but also within myself. I turn 18, tell my boyfriend I love him, and start planning for prom & graduation. I apparantly feel like I can really relate to Jewel and The O.C. lolololol This episode is packed with details of an 18-year-old who is trying her absolute best and the boy(s) who loves her. For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    1h 7m

  6. 2025-11-05

    Episode 26 - Handjobs and Hard Conversations

    Part way through this episode, I decide to split this journal into two episodes because just SO much is happening! It's winter 2005 and I am coked out of my mind. I go on a bender in Quebec City and am slowly falling madly in love with my very kind, albeit slightly troubled boyfriend. There's a love triangle. There's a party bus. There's a formal dance.  There's sex and drugs and big time rock and roll... and there the hell are my parents?!?! I also spend some time reminiscing about my friend Mark who died in late 2018. It felt good to talk about his memory, but also leveled me a bit more than I was expecting it to. 3 If you're thinking about someone you've lost, I just want to send you a little extra love. For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    56 min
  7. Episode 25 - The Worst House Party Ever

    2025-10-06

    Episode 25 - The Worst House Party Ever

    CONTENT WARNING: This episode mentions suicide. Please take gentle care when listening. Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support ------ On October 1st, 2005, I got a phone call that would change my life forever. It all started the night my sister and I decided to throw a house party that got way out of control. It ended with my friend in the hospital with a (self-inflicted) gunshot wound to the head.  This was not an easy episode to record or produce, but I'm still here and ready to share pieces of this story with you. Thanks for listening and take good care. For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    47 min
  8. Episode 24 - Tanked in a Lime Green Tube Top

    2025-09-29

    Episode 24 - Tanked in a Lime Green Tube Top

    This episode starts with me getting kicked out of my house and ends with me rolling around in bed with someone from my past. Oh, by the way, I'm 17.  Things at home are the worst they've ever been, but my parents are almost completely absent from this one. I'm left to my own devices and surprise, surprise, chaos ensues. Join me as I reminisce about my first "grown-up" date where we sit on his bed and watch South Park. I'll introduce you to a few new friends and walk you through the bender I went on when my new best friend's parents leave us alone for a week. I also share a traumatic event where a lot of my friends were assaulted in the park and I had to run for my life... so take it easy with this one! This episode is ripe with my own reflections. I feel trapped between two worlds and am distraught and confused after my breakup with Grnt.  It's a heavy one, and it's about to get so much worse. /3 We're in the hard part, folks. Buckle up! --------------------- Up next, I'll be sharing about a big trauma in my life. I wanted to share an interview from a few years back, where I talk more about the incident I'll be diving into next episode, in case you want to prepare yourselves! Here's my conversation with Najwa Zebian: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2cb6MmppWc5GdI0wMhbo0p?si=PogwDKddR_-pmxh8KfNT5w&nd=1&dlsi=8ad2e8248edf4684 For more info on my work as a writing coach or to sign up for workshops, head to www.doulaofwords.com To sign up to be a guest, please email Yoda at yoda@thedoulaofwords.com - we'd love to have you! Find my books here 3 ------------ Kid's Help Phone: You can reach a professional counsellor at Kids Help Phone in English or French 24/7 by calling 1-800-668-6868 9-8-8: Call or text from anywhere in Canada or the U.S., anytime CMHA: Call Reach Out at 1-866-933-2023 to receive mental health and/or addictions support

    58 min
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About

For more than 2 decades, I have written in a diary almost every single day. And guess what? I saved them ALL. Each week, I will be reading from these archives and getting to know myself from the lens of my 10, 16, 25, and 36-year-old self. We'll explore big topics such as body image, queerness, divorce, addiction, mental health, and friendship. I'll read cringy poems and attempt to find compassion for the painful tenderness of my younger self. Join the drama of me and my guests as we explore our boy-crazy, closeted, angsty selves... one stupid page at a time.

Information

  • Creator
    Yoda Olinyk
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    34
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Angsty Pod
  • Show Website
    The Angsty Pod