The Rewrite

Jamie Vanderknokke

A podcast about ditching the default, rewriting your story, and leading a life that actually feels like yours. Real conversations, mindset shifts, and identity rewrites to help you stop settling and start living on purpose. The pen is in your hand, and the next chapter is up to you. This is The Rewrite.

  1. 6D AGO

    EP 28: You're Not Tired Because You're Lazy - Your Brain Is Leaking Energy

    Most people are exhausted long before they ever do anything. Not because the task is hard, but because their brain has been leaking energy all day without them even realizing it. Small leaks. Constant leaks. Death by a thousand tiny demands. In this solo episode, I'm breaking down the five biggest energy leaks that drain your brain before you've even started your day, and what actually helps (without doing a full life overhaul). Because here's the thing: people think they lack discipline, but really their brain is running on fumes by 10 AM. As a certified neuroscience coach, I see this constantly. Your energy doesn't show up after motivation or habits or consistency - it comes way before all of that. And if your brain is burning 60% of its capacity on invisible stressors, everything feels harder than it needs to be. In this episode, you'll learn: Why your energy (not motivation or habits) is the foundation of everything—and it's not woo-woo, it's your actual cognitive and nervous system energyThe 5 different leaks to pay attentionWhy a simple task can take all day: not because it's hard, but because your brain never stays long enough to reach flow stateWhat actually helps (practical edition)You're not tired because you're weak or lazy. You're probably tired because your brain is working overtime behind the scenes. Once you start plugging those energy leaks, everything gets easier: decision-making, focus, follow-through. Your whole life feels more doable because your brain isn't burning 60% of its capacity on invisible stressors. Support your brain, and your brain will support you back. Ready to plug your energy leaks?If this resonated with you, please rate this episode (it helps way more than you know!) or send it to someone who needs to hear it. Connect with me on Instagram: @vandercreativeco and @itsjamievander

    10 min
  2. MAR 18

    EP 27: From ICU Nurse to Advance Care Planning Advocate with Carly Hickey

    In this conversation with my friend Carly Hickey, a registered nurse with over 10 years of ICU experience and founder of ACE Planning Company, we dive into something most people never think about until it's too late: preparing for aging, serious illness, and the unexpected. Carly helps individuals and families get proactive about advance care planning - making hard conversations feel less overwhelming and a lot more empowering. Carly gets beautifully honest about why she left the bedside after a decade of loving her ICU job, how losing her stepfather suddenly at 61 (seven days after taking him in for a sore neck) changed everything, and why watching families leave the ICU alone after losing a loved one made her realize: there has to be a better way. She shares her journey from nurse to entrepreneur (not a typical path for nurses), the mental health struggles she faced after leaving her identity as an ICU nurse, and how starting a business became her "passion project" while nursing her baby at midnight. In this episode, you'll learn: Why advance care planning falls into "important but not urgent" on the Eisenhower matrix (and why that makes it so easy to ignore)The brutal reality: we have "bringing home baby" classes to prepare for caregiving at the beginning of life, but no preparation for caregiving at the endHow Carly took her stepfather in for a sore neck and he passed away seven days later - completely unexpectedly at 61Why the trauma of sudden loss can be the most psychologically traumatizing (and how preparation can soften that blow)The social and economical constructs that make it rare for nurses to become entrepreneurs (scope of practice, liability, insurance, HIPAA compliance, expensive EMRs)How nurse seniority works: when you leave a hospital, you start at the bottom of the food chain again (which made Carly rethink her career when her husband's job became mobile)The moment she decided to start her business: sitting in bed during the pandemic, seeing targeted ads, and telling her husband "I'm starting a business. I'm doing it."Carly's story is a powerful reminder that time is fleeting and our most important resource. If you've been avoiding conversations about aging parents, advance care planning, or what happens when the unexpected hits - this episode will give you permission (and a roadmap) to start. Connect with Carly: Instagram: @aceplanningco Website: www.aceplanningco.com Take the Advance Care Planning Audit Quiz on her website Free phone calls available - always happy to answer questions Coming soon: Podcast with an ICU physician, nurse, and healthcare ethicist

    36 min
  3. MAR 11

    EP 26: Messy Action Over Perfect Planning (And Why I'm Done Fine-Tuning in Private)

    In this solo episode, I'm getting brutally honest about something that has tripped me up more times than I care to admit: my resistance to taking messy action. I've spent years fine-tuning things in the background - tweaking, editing, reworking, adjusting the font, rewriting the offer, changing the idea, making the plan better, clearer, more strategic. And on the surface? That looks productive. But if I zoom out, a lot of it has been avoidance. This year, one of my main goals is simple: take messy action. Stop polishing things in private and start putting them into motion before they feel perfect. Because if I don't put things out into the world without giving it too much thought, chances are I'm going to fine-tune them long enough to come up with the next amazing idea, and the first idea will go up on the shelf, probably never to see the light of day. In this episode, you'll learn: Why fine-tuning in the background feels productive but is often just avoidance in disguiseThe brutal truth: if you don't put something out into the world, you don't have to risk someone not liking it or see that it's not working - you can live in the blissful idea of potential (and potential feels safe)How perfectionism isn't laziness— - t's protection (your brain would rather stay in "almost ready" than face possible outcomes)Why perfectionism can look like high-achieving, responsible, strategic work when it's really just fear wearing a productivity costumeThe neuroscience of why your brain predicts outcomes based on past experiences: if something didn't go well before, your brain nudges you toward "safer" activities like tweaking, planning, reorganizingWhy those activities feel productive but don't trigger the same level of vulnerability as actually doing the thingHow "engage" is one of the steps in The Rewrite Method for a reason, and why it's not random that it's in thereIf you're someone who has 10 notebooks filled with ideas, half-built programs sitting in Google Docs, a million Instagram drafts, or offers you keep refining but never release - I totally get it. I'm right there with you. But at some point, you have to let the world respond. You have to engage. Not recklessly, not without thought, but imperfectly. Rewriting doesn't happen in theory. It happens in motion. Your brain learns through lived experience. If you want a new result, you have to create new data. And new data only comes from engaging. So this year, I'm choosing to move before I feel fully ready - not recklessly, not chaotically, but intentionally imperfect. If you've been stuck in that "almost ready" phase of your life too, maybe this is your nudge. Engage. Let it be messy. Let it teach you. Let it be an experiment. Let your brain update. Ready to stop fine-tuning and start engaging?If you want support taking messy action and rewiring your patterns, you know where to find me. Connect with me on Instagram: @vandercreativeco and @itsjamievander

    13 min
  4. MAR 4

    EP 25: From $400 Websites to Agency Owner: Andrea Krones on 21 Years of Design, Partnership, and Finding Your Worth

    In this conversation with my friend Andrea Krones, co-founder and creative director at Inkling Design, we dive into what it actually takes to build a design and web agency over 21 years - including all the undercharging, overdelivering, and confidence-building that happened along the way. Andrea supports heart-centered, female-founded businesses with branding, websites, and marketing materials, and her journey from cautious junior graphic designer to confident agency owner is full of pivots, partnerships, and hard-won lessons. Andrea gets refreshingly honest about charging $400 for her first website (spoiler: she made $2/hour), why she never thought she'd be capable of being a business owner, and how bringing on her business partner Kelly in 2017 changed everything. We talk about the difference between having freelancers and having someone equally invested in your business, why she took a nutrition degree before discovering graphic design even existed, and what it's like to navigate hiring a team when some portfolios make "bits of her soul die." In this episode, you'll learn: How Andrea accidentally started her business by telling a friend she could design websites (when she'd never designed one before)Why she charged $400 for her first website and made $2/hour—but got referred like crazy because she was "cheap as well"The brutal truth about undercharging and overdelivering: "It was the best scenario for clients, not the best scenario for me"How she left her full-time job for a part-time one, then had to make a choice when they wanted her full-time: safety or all-in on her businessWhy she was "always very cautious and a perfectionist" and never thought she'd be capable of being a business ownerHer biggest lesson for young designers: "Charge your worth. You don't have to undercharge in order to get clients if you're good."Andrea's story is a masterclass in patience, persistence, and learning to trust yourself slowly over time. If you've ever felt like you weren't capable of being a business owner, or if you've undercharged your way through the early years, this episode will remind you: you're not alone, and you're building something real. Connect with Andrea: Instagram: @inkling.design and @its.andrea.krones LinkedIn: Inkling-Design and Andrea Krones Website: inklingdesign.ca

    38 min
  5. FEB 25

    EP 24: Your Brain Has a Bouncer (And It's Filtering Out Your Success)

    Your brain is getting flooded with millions of bits of information every second. You can't possibly focus on all of it. So your reticular activating system (RAS) steps in and decides what you pay attention to. Think of it like a bouncer at the door of your brain - some things get in, everything else stays outside. But here's the wild part: your RAS decides what gets through based on what you believe, what matters to you, and what you expect to find. In this solo episode, I'm breaking down one of my favorite neuroscience concepts that explains why your life feels the way it does, why you notice certain things and miss others, why you stay stuck in old patterns, and why some goals feel impossible until suddenly they don't. Once you understand how your RAS works, you can't unsee it, and you'll finally understand why you keep repeating the same patterns year after year, even when you genuinely want change. In this episode, you'll learn: What the reticular activating system (RAS) is and how it acts like a bouncer for your brain, filtering millions of bits of information every secondWhy your RAS highlights what you believe, not what's true (if you think everyone is judging you, it shows you the one person who looks at you funny and ignores the 10 people smiling)How your RAS proves your existing stories right - not because it's sabotaging you, but because it thinks it's being helpfulWhy you suddenly notice the car you want to buy everywhere, hear your name in a crowded room, and remember negative feedback more than positive feedbackThe brutal truth: if you say "I want to grow my business" but deep down believe "I'll probably fail," your RAS filters through the belief, not the intentionWhy you notice obstacles more than solutions, risk more than possibilities, and reasons to stay small instead of reasons to go biggerHow your nervous system controls your RAS filter: when you're stressed or overwhelmed, your RAS goes into protective mode and highlights threats, problems, and worst-case scenariosWhy regulation matters so much: a regulated nervous system gives your RAS permission to widen its filter and notice possibilities, options, support, and opportunities that were always there5 practical ways to retrain your RAS: set clear intentions (not vague ones), ask better questions ("What would make this easier?" instead of "Why is this so hard?"), use micro proof (tiny follow-through creates emotional significance), interrupt old stories with neutral reframes, and regulate firstThe powerful weekly practice: "What do I want my brain to notice more of this week?" (not the whole year, just this week)Why this isn't manifestation or toxic positivity - it's literal neuroscienceThis is how your internal reality shifts, which is how your external reality shifts. Not because you thought positive thoughts, but because your filter changed. You're not broken if you keep noticing the negative—your RAS is just doing what it's trained to do. You're not unmotivated if you keep missing opportunities—your brain literally filters them out because it doesn't think they're relevant. And you're not failing if you keep circling back to the same patterns - your brain will always default to whatever story it knows best. The beautiful part? You can retrain it. Not through pressure, not through perfection - just through repetition, intention, and a regulated nervous system. Once your filter changes, the way you experience your life will change with it. Ready to retrain your RAS?If you want support retraining your brain, working with your nervous system, and rewriting the patterns that shape your business and your life, you know where to find me. Connect with me on Instagram: @vandercreativeco and @itsjamievander

    11 min
  6. FEB 18

    EP 23: Why Your Brain Fights Change (Even When You Want It)

    Why do I keep saying I want this, but my actions don't match? Why am I resisting something I know is good for me? Why does change feel so exhausting even when it's something I choose? If you've ever wondered this, you're not alone, and you're definitely not broken. As a certified neuroscience coach, I can tell you this is literally how your brain is built. This frustration shows up in pretty much every coaching conversation I have with my clients, so today we're breaking down why your brain fights change (even the good kind) and how to work with it instead of treating it like the enemy. In this solo episode, I'm diving into the neuroscience behind resistance, self-sabotage, and why you can want something with your whole heart and still feel massive resistance when it comes time to actually do it. Spoiler: your brain's ultimate purpose is to keep you alive - not happy, not fulfilled, not successful. Just alive. And the easiest way it does that? By relying on the familiar. In this episode, you'll learn: Why your brain equates familiar with safe and new with possible threat (even when the new thing is a goal you consciously want)The two parts of your brain constantly fighting each other: your prefrontal cortex wants growth, but your limbic system wants safetyHow your limbic system interprets your goals: "I want to start showing up online" = exposure and judgment = dangerWhy your nervous system determines whether change feels doable or impossible (if you're stressed, even the simplest things feel overwhelming)The truth about resistance: it's not laziness, it's a signal that your system needs grounding before it can take on moreWhy your brain won't let you stack new habits on top of an overloaded system (it won't risk destabilizing you)How old patterns pull you back: your brain loves to predict the future based on past patterns because it's efficient and requires less energyWhy you fall back into habits you don't even like (those pathways are well-practiced, and your brain will always choose the well-worn path unless you slowly carve a new one)5 ways to work with your brain instead of fighting it: make it smaller than you think, pair change with something familiar (habit stacking), regulate before you act, give your brain a safety plan, and celebrate tiny winsThe reframe that changes everything: instead of "Why can't I do this?" try "What part of me doesn't feel safe with this yet?"Your system isn't trying to ruin your life. It's trying to protect you based on outdated information. Once you see it that way, the whole relationship changes. You soften. You move out of shame and into awareness. And from awareness, rewiring becomes a lot easier. If you've been frustrated with yourself because change feels harder than it should, just breathe. You're not behind. You're not dramatic. You're not under-motivated. You're human, and your brain is just doing its job. The resistance you feel isn't a flaw, it's a signal. A signal that your system needs support, not shame. A signal that you're not wrong, you're just rewiring. Once you start working with your brain instead of strong-arming it, everything gets easier. Slow, steady, grounded, and actually sustainable. Ready to rewire your habits and regulate your nervous system?If you want support learning how to work with your brain instead of against it, you know where to find me. Connect with me on Instagram: @vandercreativeco and @itsjamievander

    10 min
  7. FEB 11

    EP 22: From House Fire to Bestselling Author with Carly Ottaway

    In this conversation with my dear friend Carly Ottaway, we dive deep into what it actually takes to write a book, share your story, and step into the identity of "bestselling author" when imposter syndrome is screaming at you. Carly is the author of Coming Home: Your Path to Your Favorite Self and Permission to Do It Your Way, creator of The Mirror Effect, and founder of the award-winning boutique marketing agency Web of Words. But this episode isn't just about the book, it's about the metamorphosis that happened while writing it. For six months, Carly broke out in hives every single night as she prepared to share her story with the world. She resisted the memoir style for years, convinced her story "wasn't big enough." And she was writing without knowing what the end of her story would be - literally journaling through a pandemic, a house fire, rebuilding everything, and raising two young kids while running a thriving business. In this episode, you'll learn: How Carly's book became the catalyst for her to fully step into her favorite self (the book is about becoming your favorite self, and writing it forced her to embody it)Why she broke out in hives for six months while preparing to publish, and how they disappeared the day she had a healing breakthroughThe moment she realized: "If I could write this book when I was going on such limited sleep, I can do anything"How her 7-year-old daughter became her best accountability buddy (and why there was no way she wasn't going to follow through once she told her kids)The struggle of claiming the title "writer" and "author" before the book is published (and why you need to say it out loud anyway)Carly gets beautifully honest about the identity shift that comes with becoming an author, why she needed to write this book to become the author of the next one, and how she's now stepping into a new season where everything feels aligned. She's launching a podcast, doing more speaking, and stepping into opportunities she dreamed about as a kid, all because she finally came home to herself. If you've ever felt like your story isn't "big enough" to share, or if you've been hiding behind the keyboard telling everyone else's story instead of your own, this episode will give you permission to step forward. Your story matters. And sharing it might just be the catalyst for your own metamorphosis. Connect with Carly:Instagram: @carlyottawayWebsite: www.carlyottaway.comGet the book: www.cominghomebook.comAgency: Web of Words

    51 min
  8. FEB 4

    EP 21: Self-Trust Isn't About Motivation - It's About Evidence

    If you've ever felt inconsistent, behind, or like you keep making promises to yourself that you don't keep, this episode is for you. Self-trust isn't glamorous. It's not something people brag about on Instagram. But it's one of the most practical things you can work on if you want anything in your life or business to actually change. And as a certified neuroscience coach, I can tell you: this isn't about being motivated enough or disciplined enough. It's your brain doing exactly what it's designed to do. In this solo episode, I'm breaking down the neuroscience of self-trust - why most people think they're inconsistent when really their brain has just stopped believing the things they say they're going to do. Self-trust is basically the agreement between your words and your behavior. And your brain? It's tracking patterns, not judging you. In this episode, you'll learn: What self-trust actually is: the agreement between your words and your behavior (and how your brain logs every single promise you make)Why your brain learns patterns like "every Monday I say I'm starting fresh, by Wednesday it's gone" - not in a shameful way, just in a data-collection wayThe signs that self-trust is low: second-guessing, avoiding simple tasks, procrastinating even when you want something, feeling overwhelmed by stuff that shouldn't be overwhelmingHow your brain conserves energy when it doesn't believe you'll follow through (and stops activating the systems that help you take action)Why self-trust doesn't break down from big failures - it erodes in small, normal, everyday ways (telling yourself you'll go for a walk and then not going, saying you'll start Monday and moving it to next Monday)The neuroscience of micro-commitments: how tiny, boring follow-through rebuilds self-trust through repetition and dopamineWhy you can't build self-trust from a dysregulated nervous system (your brain starts predicting threat everywhere, even when it's just a simple task)The power of the 10-minute timer trick for tasks you keep avoiding (spoiler: you usually keep going after it goes off because you've built momentum)The one question to ask yourself: "What is one tiny thing I can follow through on that proves to my brain I am reliable?"This isn't about needing a new personality or a perfect morning routine. Your brain just needs proof. Proof that your words and your behavior are lining back up. Once you build that, you get momentum, you get confidence, and you start showing up with steadiness that actually feels like you. If you've been feeling like a failure at life, like you always procrastinate, like you can never stick to anything, you're not failing. You're just human. And your brain is doing exactly what it's built to do. So start small. Pick something doable. Give your brain and your nervous system a reason to believe you again. The version of you who trusts herself? She will appear. She just needs a little bit of evidence. Ready to rebuild your self-trust?If you want support regulating your nervous system and actually implementing the changes you want in your life and business, you know where to find me. Connect with me on Instagram: @vandercreativeco and @itsjamievander

    9 min
5
out of 5
22 Ratings

About

A podcast about ditching the default, rewriting your story, and leading a life that actually feels like yours. Real conversations, mindset shifts, and identity rewrites to help you stop settling and start living on purpose. The pen is in your hand, and the next chapter is up to you. This is The Rewrite.