The Shift Show

ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling
  • 4.9 (48)
  • Self-Improvement

We’re on a mission to make the world of psychology approachable, easy to understand, and (*gasp*) enjoyable. Join us every month as we use psychological insight to unravel the craziness of life, from porn addiction to toxic parenting, and everything in between. And don’t worry, we’ll leave out the psychobabble.

  1. Jun 9

    040: Decision Paralysis & Fear of Choosing Wrong

    Decision paralysis isn't really about the decision. It's about the identity-level beliefs running underneath. In this episode of The Shift Show, ShiftGrit founder and registered psychologist Andrea McTague is joined by Kai Ongaro, a fourth-year psychology student at the University of Alberta and a member of the ShiftGrit client experience team, to unpack why choosing can feel so high-stakes, especially for younger generations navigating school, careers, and relationships. When the threat brain treats every choice as permanent, the mind starts hunting for total certainty. You research endlessly, weigh option against option, and quietly opt out of deciding at all. From the outside it can look like carelessness. It's usually the opposite: hyper-caring about a future that has to be perfect. Underneath decision paralysis sit a few familiar limiting beliefs: "I'm a failure," so I need to be successful. "I'm incapable," so I need to be capable. "I'm less than," so I need to be more. Add a social feed that only ever shows the finished product, and the bar quietly becomes "start perfectly, or don't start at all." In this episode: How analysis paralysis disguises itself as "being careful" while keeping you stuckThe limiting beliefs underneath the fear of choosing wrongWhy the social media highlight reel fuels perfectionism and avoidanceThe sunk cost fallacy and the never-ending second-guessing loopHow a safe space to fail builds the self-efficacy that paralysis erodesWhy removing the belief beats piling on more strategiesIdentity-Level Therapy for Decision Paralysis At ShiftGrit, we don't treat "indecisiveness." We work with the identity-level patterns driving the fear of choosing wrong. When the threat system is regulated and limiting beliefs are addressed, people often find that decisions stop feeling like a referendum on their worth, and start feeling like steps they can take, learn from, and adjust. Identity-Level Therapy helps with decision paralysis by: • regulating the nervous system • easing the demand for total certainty • making sense of avoidance and over-research • reconditioning beliefs like "I'm a failure" and "I'm incapable" • restoring the capacity to choose and move forward It's not about forcing a decision. It's about removing what's silently working against you. Go deeper: Watch, listen, and read the full breakdown on the episode pageDecision Paralysis & Fear of Choosing Wrong: the clinical breakdownHow limiting beliefs drive patterns like this onePerformance Psychology at ShiftGrit: clinical overviewReferenced in the episode: Jonathan Haidt, The Coddling of the American MindThe Shift Show is produced by ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling.

    21 min

  2. Jun 9

    039: How to Tell If Therapy Is Actually Working: 4 Signs of an Effective Therapist

    Most people can't tell whether their therapy is working until they've spent months and a lot of money finding out. In this episode of The Shift Show, ShiftGrit founder and registered psychologist Andrea McTague sits down with Brendon Braithwaite, who came up through ShiftGrit's internship program and is now a staff mental health therapist. They get candid about what actually separates effective therapy from spinning your wheels, and the concrete signs you can look for, starting before you even commit. The conversation moves past the usual "is my therapist a good personal fit?" toward four markers that tell you far more: 1. A clear game plan. Can your therapist explain what therapy with them will actually look like, the intake, the early sessions, the framework underneath it? "We'll just get to know you and talk about your problems" is a red flag. 2. A moving needle. The thing you came in to work on should change, and not over a five-year horizon. Watch for the good-to-bad ratio in your life starting to flip. 3. Directiveness. Is your therapist bringing structure, explanations, and a way of seeing the pattern, or are you mostly venting? Venting on its own tends to reinforce rumination. 4. Real answers. Can they tell you why your pattern is there, how it got there, and what they plan to do about it? Andrea and Brendon also dig into "truth over comfort," one of ShiftGrit's core values, the idea of "educated love," and why effective therapy works at the level of limiting beliefs and the root of a pattern rather than band-aiding the symptom. Identity-Level Therapy at ShiftGrit At ShiftGrit, we don't just manage symptoms. We work with the identity-level patterns, the limiting beliefs, driving emotional and behavioural responses. When the threat system is regulated and those beliefs are reconditioned, change tends to show up in everyday life rather than staying an insight in the room. Identity-Level Therapy is built to: • get to the root of a pattern, not just the symptom • regulate the nervous system • recondition the beliefs underneath the behaviour • aim for change you can notice in real life • work with structure and a clear plan It's not about talking in circles. It's about removing what's silently working against you. Go deeper: Watch, listen, and read the full breakdown on the episode pageMeet Brendon Braithwaite (Edmonton and virtual)How limiting beliefs shape the patterns therapy addressesExplore the ShiftGrit Pattern LibraryBook a consult or find a therapist: ShiftGrit Psychology & CounsellingThe Shift Show is produced by ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling.

    43 min

  3. Feb 10

    038: Breaking the Founder Ceiling: Limiting Beliefs That Block Entrepreneurs From Success

    Entrepreneurial struggle isn’t really about strategy. It’s about the identity-level beliefs running underneath. In this episode of The Shift Show, Andrea McTague is joined by Claire Goddard, Registered Provisional Psychologist at ShiftGrit, to explore why so many capable, intelligent founders hit an invisible ceiling — even when their business is objectively succeeding. Entrepreneurs often assume burnout, anxiety, or stagnation means they need a better plan, more discipline, or sharper execution. But as this conversation unpacks, those struggles are frequently driven by threat-based identity patterns that initially fuel success — and later make it unsustainable. Andrea and Claire break down how limiting beliefs such as I Am Incapable, I Am Powerless, I Am a Failure, I Am At Risk, and I Do Not Deserve get activated in entrepreneurship. When these beliefs drive behaviour, founders may overwork, avoid decisions, micromanage, shut down, or stay stuck in sprint–crash cycles that erode health, relationships, and long-term business outcomes. You’ll hear examples from the therapy room — founders who can’t slow down without panic, leaders who feel unsafe delegating, entrepreneurs who lose their sense of identity after an exit, and high performers whose nervous systems never fully leave survival mode. In This Episode: • Why entrepreneurship activates identity-level beliefs • How threat-based drive creates early success — and long-term burnout • The difference between cognitive motivation and threat motivation • Why logic, insight, and strategy don’t stick when the nervous system is activated • The “sprint–crash” cycle many founders get trapped in • What it actually means to move drive out of the threat brain Key Quotes “Entrepreneurship driven by threat is incredibly costly in the long run.” — Andrea  “Founders often confuse survival drive with motivation.” — Claire  “You don’t lose your ambition when a belief is removed — you gain capacity.” — Andrea Identity-Level Therapy for Entrepreneurs At ShiftGrit, we don’t treat “business problems.” We work with the identity-level patterns driving emotional and behavioural responses in entrepreneurship. When the threat system is regulated and limiting beliefs are addressed, founders often report feeling more grounded, strategic, and sustainable — without losing their ambition or edge. Identity-Level Therapy helps entrepreneurs: • regulate the nervous system • reduce burnout and reactivity • understand avoidance and over-control • recondition limiting beliefs • lead and build from a more stable foundation It’s not about pushing harder. It’s about removing what’s silently working against you. 🔗 Explore the Episode + Watch the Video Watch the video and play the full episode here:  👉 https://shiftgrit.com/shift-show/breaking-the-founder-ceiling-limiting-beliefs-entrepreneurs/ 🔹 If You’re in Alberta Learn more about structured, transparent therapy that works at the identity level:  👉 ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling Claire Goddard, R. Provisional Psychologist – ShiftGrit Specializing in entrepreneurship, identity-level beliefs, and performance patterns 👉 https://shiftgrit.com/therapists/claire-goddard/

    1h 15m

  4. Feb 9

    037: Relationship Dynamics: Creating Secure, Connected Partnerships by Breaking Unhealthy Patterns

    Relationship struggles aren’t really about communication. They’re about the patterns running underneath. In this episode of The Shift Show, Andrea McTague is joined by Geneviève Malena, Registered Social Worker at ShiftGrit, to explore relationship dynamics — the emotional and nervous-system patterns that shape how partners connect, argue, withdraw, pursue, and repair. Many couples believe they’re fighting about chores, parenting, intimacy, time, or effort. But as this conversation unpacks, those moments are usually just triggers, not causes. What’s actually driving conflict are deeper beliefs about safety, worth, power, and belonging that get activated in close relationships. You can’t communication-skill your way out of a threat response.  Insight matters, but it doesn’t hold when the nervous system is dysregulated. Andrea and Geneviève break down why the same fights repeat, why romantic partnerships activate us more than any other relationship, and how attachment histories and past experiences quietly shape present-day dynamics. You’ll hear real-world examples from therapy — couples stuck in pursue-withdraw cycles, partners caught in blame and defensiveness, patterns of over-accommodating and resentment, and relationships where disconnection grows even when both people care deeply. In This Episode: • Why the fight is never about the fight How surface-level arguments act as triggers for deeper emotional patterns. • Relationship dynamics explained What a “dynamic” actually is and why it’s so sticky. • Why partners trigger us more than anyone else How attachment, nervous-system responses, and early experiences collide in intimacy. • Blame, shame, and defensiveness in relationships Why trying to fix your partner keeps patterns locked in place. • Secure vs. unsafe partnership dynamics What creates emotional safety — and what quietly erodes it over time. • Why repeating cycles don’t mean the relationship is broken Patterns persist until they’re understood, not because people aren’t trying. Key Quotes: “The fight is never about what the fight is about.” — Andrea“We bring our unfinished business into our relationships.” — Geneviève“Blame protects the ego, but it gives away control.” — Andrea Identity-Level Therapy for Relationship Patterns At ShiftGrit, we don’t treat “communication problems.” We work with the identity-level patterns that drive emotional reactions within relationships. When the belief-and-nervous-system layer is addressed, clients often report feeling calmer, clearer, and less reactive — even before behavioural strategies are applied. Identity-Level Therapy helps clients: • understand repeating relationship patterns • regulate emotional reactivity • reduce blame and defensiveness • clarify needs and boundaries • create conditions for safer connection It’s not about trying harder. It’s about removing the patterns running the relationship. 🔗 Explore the Episode + Watch the Video  👉 https://shiftgrit.com/shift-show/relationship-dynamics-secure-connected-partnerships/ If You’re in Alberta Learn more about structured, transparent therapy that focuses on patterns beneath symptoms:  👉 ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling Geneviève Malena, RSW – ShiftGrit Specializing in relationship dynamics, attachment, and emotional patterns in partnership 👉 https://shiftgrit.com/therapists/genevieve-malena/

    1h 10m

  5. 2025-11-27

    036: Mind Over Money: Overcoming the Limiting Beliefs Driving Financial Anxiety

    Money stress isn’t really about money. It’s about the identity-level beliefs running underneath. In this episode of The Shift Show, Andrea sits down with Jenae White, Registered Provisional Psychologist at ShiftGrit’s Calgary studio, and Crystal Taylor, Financial Planner and Wealth Management Consultant. Together, they explore why smart, capable people still feel overwhelmed by money—overspending, shutting down, avoiding statements, over-saving, or never feeling “ahead.” You can’t discipline or budget your way out of a threat response. Financial knowledge matters, but it doesn’t stick when the nervous system is activated by beliefs like: “I am falling behind.” “I am not in control.” “I am at risk.” “I do not deserve.” When these beliefs trigger, the threat system hijacks decision-making. That’s why your logical mind knows the plan, but your behaviour doesn’t follow it. The team explains how early experiences shape these patterns and why money becomes a lightning rod for stress, shame, and avoidance. You’ll hear examples from therapy and financial planning—Calgarians feeling pressure to “keep up,” families stuck in financial enmeshment, individuals dealing with guilt or underspending, and couples in avoidance cycles. In This Episode: • The psychology of financial overwhelm How freeze, fawn, and over-functioning create repeating patterns. • Why Calgarians feel “behind.” How comparison and pressure fuel anxiety. • Beliefs that drive money behaviours Why beliefs influence choices more than budgeting. • Why avoidance gives relief but long-term stress The brain prioritizes short-term safety. • How therapy and planning work together Regulation creates capacity; strategy creates direction. • Why patterns aren’t about intelligence or willpower Knowledge isn’t enough when the threat system is active. Key Quotes “People think they have money problems. They actually have threat-system problems.” — Andrea  “The belief ‘I’m falling behind’ is the engine of so many decisions.” — Jenae  “You can’t budget your way out of a belief.” — Crystal Identity-Level Therapy for Money Stress At ShiftGrit, we don’t treat “money issues.” We work with the identity patterns driving emotional reactions to money. Once the belief layer is regulated, clients often report feeling calmer and more grounded. Identity-Level Therapy helps clients:  • regulate the nervous system  • reduce shame and avoidance  • understand overwhelm  • recondition beliefs  • align actions with long-term goals It’s not about willpower. It’s about removing the patterns fighting against it. 🔗 Explore the Episode + Watch the Video Watch the video and play the full episode here:  👉 https://shiftgrit.com/shift-show/mind-over-money-limiting-beliefs-financial-anxiety/ If You’re in Calgary Explore how structured, transparent therapy works at the identity level:  👉 Calgary Therapy: What Most People Don’t Know When Choosing a Psychologist Jenae White, R. Provisional Psychologist – ShiftGrit Calgary Profile: https://shiftgrit.com/therapists/jenae-white/ Crystal Taylor – Licensed Financial Advisor and She-EO of Holden + Taylor Advisory Group Website: https://holdentaylorfinancial.ca/about/ Instagram: @taylord_advisor

    1h 18m

  6. 2025-04-14

    035: Scroll, Click, Repeat: Escaping the Internet Addiction Trap

    Endless scrolling, compulsive clicking, and dopamine-driven distraction—sound familiar? In this episode, Andrea McTague and Alberto Medeiros unpack the reality of internet addiction and how modern tech subtly hijacks our minds. They explore how screen time disrupts sleep, relationships, emotional health, and productivity—often without us realizing it. Drawing from neuroscience and real-life therapy insights, they examine the psychological mechanics behind our digital habits and offer actionable strategies to break free. Whether you're seeking focus and connection, or just want to understand your phone cravings, this is your wake-up call. 📥 Download our free Digital Detox Guide: The-Ultimate-Digital-Reset-Guide-ShiftGrit.pdf 📺 Watch the full video version & read the extended summary: shiftgrit.com/shift-show 🌐 Learn more about ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling: shiftgrit.com 📘 Explore local Calgary counselling resources: calgarypsychology.info

    1h 27m

  7. 2025-03-25

    034: Rewiring Trauma: How to Break Free from Limiting Beliefs

    Summary In this episode, Andrea McTague and Mateo Sestito explore the complexities of trauma, its impact on the brain, and how early experiences shape our responses to life. They discuss the difference between disturbances and trauma, the role of limiting beliefs, and the importance of social connections in coping with trauma. The conversation emphasizes the potential for trauma to be transformed into strength and resilience through understanding and therapy. Listeners are encouraged to embrace change and recognize that trauma does not have to define their lives. Takeaways Trauma can shape our identity but does not have to define us. Understanding the brain's response to trauma is crucial for healing. Disturbances can be just as impactful as major traumas. Early experiences play a significant role in shaping our beliefs. Coping mechanisms can be identified and transformed. Social connections can buffer the effects of trauma. Incremental exposure can help desensitize traumatic responses. Therapy can facilitate the removal of limiting beliefs. Empowerment comes from understanding the roots of our behaviours. Trauma can lead to resilience and strength when processed effectively. Titles Navigating the Complexities of Trauma Transforming Trauma into Strength Sound Bites "Can trauma be beneficial?" "Understanding the why calms us down." "Trauma is not a life sentence." Chapters 00:00 Understanding Trauma and Its Storage in the Brain 17:52 Identifying and Coping with Limiting Beliefs 22:38 Factors Influencing Coping Mechanisms 32:36 Unexpected Outcomes of Removing Limiting Beliefs 38:25 Incremental Exposure and Desensitization 43:24 Understanding Avoidance and Its Impact 48:42 The Dual Nature of Trauma 53:49 Perfectionism and Its Consequences 58:59 Empowerment Through Understanding

    1h 6m

  8. 2025-01-29

    033: Parenting with Purpose: The Struggles, The Strategies & The Science

    Summary In this episode, Andrea McTague and Sharilyn Theriault explore the complexities of parenting, emphasizing the importance of parental well-being, emotional resilience, and intentionality in parenting practices. They discuss common challenges such as tantrums, the significance of co-regulation, and effective strategies for bedtime routines. The conversation also highlights the importance of scaffolding children's learning and the three C's of parenting: Calm, Connection, and Correction. The episode concludes with insights on the long-term impact of parenting styles on children's development and relationships. Takeaways Parenting is often an unrecognized but crucial job. Taking care of your mental health positively impacts your children. A little challenge can help build resilience in children. It's important to be informed but not too hard on yourself as a parent. Co-regulation is essential for managing children's emotions. Effective bedtime routines can significantly improve family dynamics. Scaffolding helps children learn independence and self-efficacy. The three C's of parenting are Calm, Connection, and Correction. Modelling behaviour is key to teaching children. Intentionality in parenting leads to better outcomes for children. Titles Navigating the Challenges of Parenting The Importance of Parental Well-being Sound Bites "Parenting is an important job." "You're learning as you go." "Don't be too hard on yourself." Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Parenting Insights 05:55 Understanding Parenting Challenges 13:09 Types of Tantrums: Instinctual vs. Premeditated 19:03 Understanding Child Behavior and Attention Seeking 23:40 The Importance of Sleep in Parenting 32:14 Techniques for Parenting and Scaffolding Learning 37:00 Motivation and Behavioral Outcomes in Children 42:11 The Importance of Autonomy and Self-Efficacy 48:35 Navigating Parental Anxiety and Child Development ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling Address: 815 17 Ave SW #210, Calgary, AB T2T 0A1 Phone: (587) 352-6463 https://maps.app.goo.gl/MFSWhTvJfohKS8TK6 https://www.google.com/maps/d/viewer?mid=1W9cOBTF1N_tKGcu2prvH_Fi3jmVSJ5k&usp=sharing  Read a review: https://g.co/kgs/fHm8RgB  See the Google Post: https://posts.gle/1SjSe5 Calgary Location: https://www.google.com/search?kgmid=/g/11c0w8k19c Edmonton Location: https://www.google.com/search?kgmid=/g/1q5bm33nh https://shiftgrit.com Get started 👉 https://shiftgrit.com/shift-show/parenting-strategies-for-toddlers/

    1h 2m
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About

We’re on a mission to make the world of psychology approachable, easy to understand, and (*gasp*) enjoyable. Join us every month as we use psychological insight to unravel the craziness of life, from porn addiction to toxic parenting, and everything in between. And don’t worry, we’ll leave out the psychobabble.

Information

  • Creator
    ShiftGrit Psychology & Counselling
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    41
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Shift Show
  • Show Website
    The Shift Show

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