Couples Healing From Pornography Addiction

Sam Tielemans, LMFT

Break free from pornography and rebuild the trust in your relationship. Hosted by licensed marriage therapist Sam Tielemans, Couples Healing From Pornography Addiction is your go-to podcast for overcoming porn addiction, restoring emotional and sexual intimacy, and healing after betrayal trauma in your marriage. Each episode offers practical tools, relationship advice, and real stories of men and couples navigating the path of porn recovery and restoring your marriage. Whether you’re just starting your healing journey or want to go deeper in quitting pornography and rebuilding your relationship, this podcast gives you the clarity, hope, and next steps you need. Topics include: How to overcome porn urges and triggers without relying on willpower Rebuilding trust after betrayal in your marriage Restoring emotional connection and sexual closeness Understanding the root causes of porn use Navigating communication breakdowns, shame, fear, and disconnection New episodes every week. Subscribe now and start your healing journey toward lasting freedom and relationship renewal.

  1. -13 H

    216: When Sexual Energy Builds: How to Avoid the Relapse Spiral Without Suppression or Shame

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome your pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Episode show notes: Today we dive deep into the real reason men relapse when sexual energy builds — and it’s not just about willpower. If you've been battling porn addiction, you’ve likely tried to resist, suppress, and distract yourself every time an urge to watch porn surfaces. But what if that strategy is actually setting you up to fail? This episode uncovers why the common “dam approach” — where you try to hold back your sexual urges through deprivation — often leads to more pressure, anxiety, and eventual porn relapses. Instead, we explore two proven frameworks that help men break free from the binge/guilt/shame cycle and experience long-term porn addiction recovery. We tell the story of two men: One who used pornography to escape emotional pain like shame, rejection, and loneliness... And one who faced habitual urges and sexual energy late at night, even after he had removed his triggers... Both learned how to stop using porn as a coping mechanism and finally felt in control again. In this episode, you'll learn:    Why deprivation often causes anxiety and increases the risk of porn relapses    How to understand what’s really driving your urge to watch porn — emotional pain vs. physical arousal     How to use mindfulness and redirection to handle urges without suppression or shame     A question that instantly grounds you when you're triggered: “What else in my environment is interesting right now?”    How to finally stop the cycle of white-knuckling, slipping, and starting over again This episode is for you if you want to: Quit porn for good Overcome habitual porn use Break free from compulsive sexual behaviors Stop relapse before it happens Build emotional and mental tools to master their porn recovery journey If you're ready to stop fighting against your urges and finally start understanding and resolving them at the root, this episode will give you the clarity and tools you’ve been missing.

    21 min
  2. 18 SEPT.

    214: How to Stop Urges Before They Hijack Your Brain

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Episode show notes: Struggling with porn urges that seem to come out of nowhere? This episode breaks down the real reason why willpower isn’t working — and why understanding the root cause of your porn addiction is the only way to create real, lasting change. You’ll learn how to identify what’s actually driving the urge — whether it’s stress, loneliness, boredom, emotional pain, or habit. Because not every urge is the same. And if you're trying to fix all of them with the same tool, you're probably staying stuck. We’ll walk through the 3 types of porn triggers — emotional, habitual, and physical — and how to tell the difference. Most importantly, you'll learn how to apply the right tool for the right trigger so you can finally stop feeling powerless.   This Episode Covers: The truth about what’s underneath most porn urges Why “just stop” never works for long The difference between an emotional trigger and a habit loop How to know when it’s real sexual desire vs. escape Why understanding the root cause is the fastest path to freedom How to map out your personal porn addiction pattern Tools to interrupt the urge and get back in control Why some guys stay stuck in relapse cycles (and how to break out)

    21 min
  3. 4 SEPT.

    212: She’s Flooded. He's Trying. Nothing Is Working. Here’s What to Do Next.

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Episode show notes: This episode is about what happens when a husband has stopped using porn, is trying to do better, but his wife still doesn’t trust him. He says the right things. He tries to be supportive. But she’s triggered, shut down, or angry — and nothing he says seems to help. This is a common part of porn addiction recovery in marriage. Even when the behavior stops, the pain doesn’t go away right away. Wives often carry deep fears after porn use, and their nervous systems stay on high alert. In this episode, listeners will learn why that happens and what to do about it. What This Episode Covers: Why healing from porn addiction takes more than just quitting What happens when a wife feels emotionally unsafe, even if things are improving How betrayal trauma affects her body and reactions What to do (and not do) when she gets triggered Why trust won’t rebuild through words alone — but through consistent action How men can build real emotional safety in the relationship How women can begin to soften once they feel true change over time Real stories of couples rebuilding after porn addiction hurt their marriage

    23 min
  4. 28 AOÛT

    211: The Carrot or the Stick - How to Bring Her Wall Down Without Pressure

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Episode show notes: If you’ve stopped watching pornography but your wife still struggles to trust you, you’re not alone — and you’re not broken. One of the hardest parts of porn addiction recovery isn’t just quitting porn… it’s rebuilding safety, connection, and intimacy in your marriage after betrayal. In this episode, we dive deep into why your wife’s walls may still be up even after you’ve started healing from pornography addiction — and why that’s normal. We’ll explore what’s happening underneath her hesitation, what she needs to feel safe again, and how you can rebuild trust without pressuring her or “proving” yourself constantly. You’ll learn: Why wives often stay guarded even after their husband stops watching porn How porn betrayal impacts safety, intimacy, and connection in marriage Why stopping porn isn’t enough to rebuild trust — and what actually creates healing Practical ways to rebuild closeness without shame, pressure, or defensiveness How consistent actions, not promises, restore trust during porn addiction recovery This episode is for you if you’ve ever thought: “I’ve quit porn, why doesn’t she believe me yet?” “I’m working so hard, but she still feels distant.” “How do we heal our marriage after porn addiction and betrayal?” Whether you’re early in your journey of overcoming porn addiction or you’ve been rebuilding for months, this episode will help you: Understand what’s really happening when her walls stay up Learn how to create genuine emotional safety Rebuild connection in your marriage without shortcuts or pressure Heal together as you recover from pornography Porn addiction recovery isn’t just about removing pornography — it’s about restoring trust, intimacy, and safety. If you’ve been working on change but still feel disconnected, this conversation will help you see what’s missing and what to focus on next.

    22 min
  5. 21 AOÛT

    210: A Simple Tool Anyone Can Use to Reduce Urges: Interview with Jeremy Lipkowitz

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Episode notes: If you’ve tried to quit porn but keep slipping back, you know how exhausting the cycle feels—hiding your habits, fighting urges, and carrying the weight of shame. Porn addiction doesn’t just affect you; it impacts your marriage, self-worth, focus, and peace of mind. In this episode, you’ll discover practical tools to overcome pornography and rebuild your life: Why porn urges feel so overpowering—and how to face them without giving in The hidden cycle of porn, shame, and emotional avoidance that keeps men stuck How to build self-control, focus, and freedom with simple mindfulness practices The difference between real recovery vs. just abstinence (and why most men miss this) How to stop using porn to escape stress, boredom, and loneliness Ways to rebuild trust in your relationship through honesty, presence, and integrity Jeremy Lipkowitz—an executive coach, meditation teacher, and former Buddhist monk—knows this struggle firsthand. After years of battling pornography himself, he discovered how mindfulness and meditation can rewire the brain, end the constant cravings, and lead to lasting transformation. Now he coaches high-achieving men around the world to quit porn and live with clarity, freedom, and purpose.   You’ll walk away from this conversation with tools that help you: ✔ Overcome porn addiction urges in real time ✔ Heal the shame that keeps you feeling stuck ✔ Reconnect with your partner and rebuild broken trust ✔ Create a life that makes porn irrelevant   🔗 Resources & Links Mentioned in This Episode: Jeremy's 14 day meditation course (free): https://www.jeremylipkowitz.com/offers/KwDc9gbJ/checkout

    58 min
  6. 14 AOÛT

    209: You Feel Pressure to "Do Better" But You Don't Have a Plan – Steal Mine

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Episode show notes: If you’ve been stuck in the cycle of porn addiction—telling yourself “this is the last time” only to fall back into old habits—you are not alone. In this episode, we break down one of the most common reasons men stay trapped in pornography: the constant internal pressure to “just be better.” This episode exposes what I call the Pressure Trap—a mindset that fuels shame, increases the risk of porn relapse, and keeps you stuck in silence. You’ll learn how to shift out of performance mode and into what actually works—what I call The Clarity Path. Inside this episode, I’ll walk you through: ✅ Why trying to quit porn with more pressure actually leads to more porn use ✅ How internal shame keeps men stuck in the pornography addiction cycle ✅ Why you don’t have a willpower problem—you have a clarity problem ✅ The 5 essential skills for porn addiction recovery that most men never learn ✅ How to rebuild emotional safety and trust in your marriage after porn ✅ How to break the porn habit loop by meeting the real emotional need ✅ How to stop relying on filters and finally heal from the root cause of porn addiction ✅ The difference between “staying clean” and actually being free from porn This is not another episode about filters or surface-level tips. It’s about understanding the deeper emotional patterns behind your porn urges and building the skills that lead to lasting freedom from pornography.

    21 min
  7. 7 AOÛT

    208: "If He Relapses Again, I'm Done." (How to Protect Your Marriage the Right Way)

    Want help uncovering the real reasons behind your urges and building a plan to overcome pornography use? Click here to book a free call with Sam to get help to overcome pornography – https://stopporn.info/    Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes? Email me here:  sam@healingcouples.org   Podcast Description: Is your relationship on the brink because of your husband's porn use? If you've said, “If he watches porn again, I’m done” — or you’re a husband who’s trying hard to stop watching porn but keep relapsing — this episode is for you. So many couples are stuck in the cycle of porn addiction, where trust is shattered and safety feels impossible. The husband feels shame and pressure to never mess up again. The wife feels exhausted and betrayed. And despite trying everything — accountability partners, internet filters, even cold showers — the porn habits keep coming back. In this episode, I reveal why most porn recovery methods fail — and why porn relapses aren’t just random slip-ups. They're the last domino in a chain of emotional stress, disconnection, and unresolved shame. You’ll learn: Why your husband’s porn relapse isn’t the root problem — and what is How to stop relying on willpower and start healing from the root cause of porn use What it actually means to “do the real work” to stop watching pornography for good How couples can rebuild trust after porn betrayal — without compromising safety or standards What wives can look for to know if he’s genuinely changing, not just staying “clean” How to set boundaries around the work being done — not just whether he’s “acting out” Whether you’re a man trying to overcome porn addiction or a wife who feels like she can’t stay if he watches porn again, this episode will give you the clarity, tools, and hope to move forward the right way.

    17 min

À propos

Break free from pornography and rebuild the trust in your relationship. Hosted by licensed marriage therapist Sam Tielemans, Couples Healing From Pornography Addiction is your go-to podcast for overcoming porn addiction, restoring emotional and sexual intimacy, and healing after betrayal trauma in your marriage. Each episode offers practical tools, relationship advice, and real stories of men and couples navigating the path of porn recovery and restoring your marriage. Whether you’re just starting your healing journey or want to go deeper in quitting pornography and rebuilding your relationship, this podcast gives you the clarity, hope, and next steps you need. Topics include: How to overcome porn urges and triggers without relying on willpower Rebuilding trust after betrayal in your marriage Restoring emotional connection and sexual closeness Understanding the root causes of porn use Navigating communication breakdowns, shame, fear, and disconnection New episodes every week. Subscribe now and start your healing journey toward lasting freedom and relationship renewal.

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