mindblown psychology

Lee Hopkins

This is an audio edition of a written piece from me, Lee Hopkins. Each episode is a standalone reflection, adapted for listening rather than reading. There's no required order, and no expectation that you listen to anything else before or after this. Settle in, and take what's useful.

  1. 31.12.2025

    Why regulation matters more than resilience

    Why regulation matters more than resilience.   Resilience is one of the most overused words in modern psychology.   It's usually framed as the ability to push through. To adapt. To keep going.   And for a while, that works.   But resilience without regulation quietly drains people.   It asks the nervous system to tolerate more and more without ever resetting.   Regulation is different.   Regulation is not about toughness. It's about recovery.   It's the system's ability to move out of activation and return to baseline.   Without regulation, resilience becomes endurance.   And endurance has a cost.   Many people, especially neurodivergent people, have been praised for resilience their entire lives.   They learned to mask early. They learned to perform competence. They learned to override discomfort.   That skill kept them functional.   But it often came at the expense of regulation.   The body stayed alert. The system stayed braced. Downtime never fully restored.   Over time, resilience becomes indistinguishable from survival mode.   This is why some people "cope" for decades and then collapse suddenly.   Not because they lacked strength.   But because strength was never paired with recovery.   If you're neurodivergent, regulation often needs to be deliberate.   Not dramatic. Just intentional.   That might mean allowing sensory decompression without guilt. Reducing context switching. Letting routines stabilise you rather than bore you.   Regulation isn't self-care theatre.   It's what allows resilience to stop being expensive.   You don't need to become less resilient.   You need more opportunities for your system to stand down.

    3 Min.

Info

This is an audio edition of a written piece from me, Lee Hopkins. Each episode is a standalone reflection, adapted for listening rather than reading. There's no required order, and no expectation that you listen to anything else before or after this. Settle in, and take what's useful.