Beer Me That Movie

Dumbumental Podcasts

Some beers deserve a toast. Others deserve a full-blown feature film. Welcome to Beer Me That Movie, the podcast where hosts Jon and Harrison crack open wild beer names and brew them into even wilder movie pitches. Every week, we take a beer (or five), let our imaginations run drunk, and craft the most absurd, over-the-top, and occasionally Oscar-worthy cinematic concepts you’ve ever heard. From action-packed blockbusters to horror-fueled fever dreams and rom-coms with more foam than substance—nothing is off-limits.

  1. vor 1 Tag

    The Final Fast Five: Thanks for all the votes!

    This is the last Fast Five ever... but Beer Me That Movie isn’t over. After 48 Fast Fives, hundreds of beers, and thousands of votes, Jon and Harrison are turning five real craft-beer names into ridiculous movie pitches one final time. They’re drinking Sierra Nevada Torpedo Extra IPA, revisiting The Mystery, and giving you one last chance to choose the next feature film. This Week’s Final Fast Five Movie Pitches: Beer #1: Juice Box — A boxer is accused of killing his opponent with performance-enhancing drugs. Was he juicing—or was he set up? A perspective-shifting courtroom whodunit where even the juice box may get a say. Beer #2: Auto Tune — A pitch-perfect madman creates technology that steals singers’ voices, drags Milli Vanilli into an international conspiracy, and forces the Sexy Nun to intervene. Eliminated and sent to The Vault. Beer #3: Massive Treat — Every kid dreams of finding the house with the king-size candy bars. But one house offers something even bigger—and no child who has claimed it has ever returned. Beer #4: Five Out of Five Stars — A picturesque small-town inn has maintained a perfect rating for years. When one difficult guest leaves a half-star review, the townspeople hunt him down to protect their reputation at any cost. Beer #5: Frequent Flyer — A lonely hospital regular arrives with a mysterious growth that won’t stop getting bigger. Is it a parasite, an alien—or the beginning of something much worse? VOTE FOR THE WINNER on our Instagram! Vote in the Vault for our 50th Feature Film: https://beermethatmovie.com/ Leave us a message and make your vote count twice: https://www.speakpipe.com/beermethatmovie Share this episode with a friend and help us choose the next Beer Me That Movie feature film. CHAPTERS 00:00 – Cold Open 00:56 – The Final Fast Five Begins 03:24 – Recap: The Mystery 12:11 – Beer of the Week: Sierra Nevada Torpedo Extra IPA 15:17 – One Last Voting Pitch 17:51 – Beer #1: Juice Box 23:49 – Beer #2: Auto Tune 30:02 – Beer #3: Massive Treat 35:15 – Beer #4: Five Out of Five Stars 40:52 – Beer #5: Frequent Flyer 48:49 – The Final Elimination 50:46 – Your Final Fast Five Ballot

    The Final Fast Five: Thanks for all the votes!
  2. 29. Juli

    Feature #48 | The Mystery: The Cornfield Conspiracy

    "If the USDA arrives before you call them—hide the fish-man."What happens when a failed salesman named Mike H accidentally cracks open a pre-Egyptian alien vault beneath rural Iowa? He discovers the Anunnaki’s discarded rough drafts of humanity: fish-men, dog-headed weirdos, alligator-jawed bruisers—and one enormous opportunity.Inspired by Mike H’s check-in of Tree House Brewing’s “The Mystery,” we’re building a cosmic-conspiracy comedy packed with roadside attractions, crop circles, government cover-ups, and an extraterrestrial middle manager desperate to hide his mistakes from Corporate.INSIDE THE EPISODE-The Beer Hook: How Tree House Brewing’s “The Mystery” and Mike H inspired Feature #48.-Something Beneath Iowa: One illegal M80 cracks open a vault older than the pyramids.-The Approved Batch: Gill, Snout, Sheila, and the forgotten prototypes that came before humanity.-The Greatest Show Off Earth: Mike turns an ancient genetic disaster into the Midwest’s hottest roadside circus.-The Cornfield Conspiracy: Tammy Twilight connects the USDA, crop circles, and a suspicious threat to “Lake Iowa.”-Alien Middle Management: Fred arrives wearing his Apollo-era human disguise and carrying a whistle that controls the creatures.-The Crop-Circle Roundup: Mike must rescue his new friends—and sell Fred on committing intergalactic corporate fraud.💬 WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!Which rejected Anunnaki prototype would you want as your roadside-circus roommate: Gill, Snout, or Sheila?And remember: if the USDA showed up before you called them, what would you hide first?👥 CONNECT WITH USWebsite: beermethatmovie.comInstagram: @beermethatmovie00:00:00 - Intro00:03:39 - A Short Message From BMTM00:05:12 - Act 1: SOMETHING UNDER IOWA00:37:54 - Act 2: THE GREATEST SHOW OFF EARTH01:06:28 - Act 3: THE CROP-CIRCLE ROUNDUP01:20:00 - Epilogue: Acceptable Chaos

    Feature #48 | The Mystery: The Cornfield Conspiracy
  3. 22. Juli

    Fast Five 46: Mind Plant, Death On Two Legs, & I'm The Highway

    This Week's Fast Five Movie Pitches: Beer #1: Mind Plant – When common houseplants suddenly gain sentience, one man sees their terrifying evolution as a divine miracle straight from the heavens—while the rest of the world watches the vines reclaim the concrete and sees a clear sign of the end times. They are aware... and they are angry. Beer #2: The Mystery – A group of rural kids exploring a hidden quarry lake stumble upon an impossible discovery: ancient, prehistoric creatures created long before humanity. Turns out mermaids are incredibly real, alligator people exist, and these teenagers are left with a lot of awkward questions about interspecies romance. Beer #3: Death On Two Legs – A stylized, high-contrast neo-noir thriller where a glamorous, fast-talking woman in a sharp suit steps into the dark alleyways of the city to help a overworked, stressed-out Grim Reaper manage his daily schedule. He works. She helps. Beer #4: I’m The Highway – A gritty, rain-slicked road movie tracking a rugged long-haul trucker who finds himself acting as a sudden guardian angel when he saves a runaway teenage girl who is in way, way over her head. Beer #5: Eager To Share – A heartwarming, whimsical tale of a kid who spends his entire childhood blowing through his father's vast savings on wild, imaginative adventures to uncover a great hidden treasure—only to dig up the backyard and realize the real wealth was right in front of him all along. VOTE FOR THE WINNER:Head over to our Instagram stories right now to cast your official vote! Are we tracking sentient foliage next week, or are we deep in the swamp solving ancient secrets?

  4. 15. Juli

    Feature #47 | On a Whim: The Space Loop Thriller

    "Find the rat. Stop the explosion. Don’t get thrown in the space psych ward." What happens when your shift as an overworked, blue-collar asteroid miner gets interrupted by your massive corporate mothership instantly vaporizing into dust? If you're Constant—the most unflappable scout pilot in the outer solar system—you get thrown backward in time and forced to hunt down a ship saboteur before the timeline catches up. Inspired by Original Pattern Brewing's "On a Whim" beer, we are world-building a hilarious, claustrophobic, and deeply chaotic sci-fi thriller. From zero-G space pests to the horrific realities of "Tube Soup boarding," this episode goes completely off the rails. Grab a cold beer, prepare Uranus, and let's find out if survival can be done... ON A WHIM. The Beer Hook: How Original Pattern Brewing's "On a Whim" inspired this entire project. Welcome to the Whim: Breaking down the tiny, claustrophobic ships and the corporate marketing lies behind them. The Anomaly: A green portal, a mysterious 3-fingered alien, and a giant explosion in the Kuiper Belt. The "We Aren't Crazy" Pact: Constant and Hap panic to create a cover story inside the pod. The Hunt for Rat October: Navigating a ship full of disgruntled space slaves and actual, wire-chewing space rats. Interrogating the Miners: Constant searches for clues using a brutal round of "Tube Soup boarding." The Loop Closes: The mind-bending paradox of three Constants, a clever trap for the aliens, and a final, sinister revelation. If you were trapped in a 99-year corporate space-mining contract, what would you do to get out? Did humanity accidentally mine Pluto out of existence? Give us your best conspiracy theories in the comments! Website: beermethatmovie.com Instagram: @beermethatmovie #SciFiPodcast #WorldBuilding #ImprovComedy #SpaceHorror #TimeLoop #RetroFuturism

  5. 8. Juli

    Fast Five 45: On A Whim, Grass Attack, & Slow Melt

    Ladies, gentlemen, rogue ice runners, and victims of the front lawn—welcome to Fast Five #45! We are back to turning your Thursday night Untappd check-ins into Hollywood cinematic gold, all while attempting to jumpstart a 20-foot Hyundai long boat and coasting uphill into another chaotic week. Before we open up the feed, we zoom out to look at last week's deeply philosophical, rural monster-thriller feature film, Copy That. We recap Bob's tragic study in modern social media loneliness, the tactical use of black light dye, and how a shape-shifting alien entity managed to infiltrate Congress. Plus, the glorious return of everyone's favorite clog-wearing, evil-hunting legend—Big Nose—in an epilogue that saves the world from a Manchurian population crisis. Tonight’s liquid inspiration is Eastern Gold from The Drowned Lands Brewery, a surprisingly complex 4.7% blonde ale hitting us with notes of graham crackers and sweet honey grapefruit on the nose (which Jon snorted straight into his brain canal, obviously). Slow Melt: A 2126 post-apocalyptic frozen tundra adventure following Ken and a crew of swashbuckling ice pirates harvesting fresh-water glaciers while dodging giant mutated polar bears.On A Whim: A high-stakes Hunt for Red October space-mining mystery featuring green time-travel portals, asteroid whimers, and a desperate race to stop a massive flagship explosion.Sleep State: A terrifying Severance-style corporate nightmare where an Elon Tusk tech monopoly hijacks your REM cycle to force you into unpaid dream labor upvoting pictures of ham bones.Grass Attack: The ultimate eco-horror thriller that will do to your front yard what Jaws did to the ocean. When the lawn wants revenge, the Miracle-Gro hits back.Bits and Bobs: Ai sex robots are real! What does this mean for humanity and what will it do to wifi costs? 👇 Help us keep the lights on in the shed! Leave us a voice message: speakpipe.com/beermethatmovieVote in The Vault: beermethatmovie.comFollow us on Instagram: @beermethatmovieFind us on Untappd: Beer Me That Movie Until next week... Peace, Punch, and don't snort your IPAs unless you're ready to fight the Pope!

    Fast Five 45: On A Whim, Grass Attack, & Slow Melt
  6. 24. Juni

    FAST FIVE #44 (The Apocalypse Recruitment Special)

    THE BALLOT BOX IS OPEN, THE PIT IS HUNGRY, AND THE ALGORITHM DEMANDS A CHOICE. Before we unleash five pristine, highly explosive narrative frameworks upon your ears—and before you judge the fact that Jon is currently eating cold, leftover cocktail shrimp out of a Tupperware container—we have a vital public service announcement: We have no corporate overlords. We are fueled strictly by your uncoerced generosity, the lingering scent of damp cardboard, and external validation. Head over to beermethatmovie.com to lock in your votes and help us prove to our families that this isn't just an elaborate, multi-year cry for help! But first, we toast last week’s recursive masterpiece, Double Jacked, with the Beer of the Week: New Belgium's limited-time re-release of their classic Fat Tire recipe. Four of these beautiful brews will make the cut for the next round, but only ONE will be strapped to the rocket ship of destiny to become our monumentally chaotic 46th Feature Film! THE FAST FIVE LINEUP Beer #1: Road to Nowhere – A rolling stone man crosses paths with a woman who owns a deeply haunted orphanage. Beer #2: Four More Fools – The leader of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse is hunting for fresh talent, and Jon is interviewing for the gig. Beer #3: Copy That – Bob the Sheriff tries to maintain law and order in a town plagued by a highly nefarious, shape-shifting mimic. Beer #4: Blacksmiths of Olympus – The ancient blacksmiths of Olympus have pivoted to the tech sector. Now, they have to scout a modern human capable of ascending to godhood to save the planet. Beer #5: Track 10 – A vinyl enthusiast uncovers a hidden track on an old record that spins him right into an obsessive, world-altering quest. Drop the remote, stop arguing with strangers on the internet, and pay attention. Production fires up at dawn tomorrow—go vote! Peace, punch, and... 00:00 - Intro 02:40 - Recap: Double Jack 10:34 - BOTW: Fat Tire 16:32 - Beer #1: Road to Nowhere 27:30 - Beer #2: Four More Fools 33:02 - Beer #3: Copy That 40:53 - Beer #4: Blacksmiths of Olympus 49:07 - Beer #5: Track 10 54:29 - Decision Time

    FAST FIVE #44 (The Apocalypse Recruitment Special)

Info

Some beers deserve a toast. Others deserve a full-blown feature film. Welcome to Beer Me That Movie, the podcast where hosts Jon and Harrison crack open wild beer names and brew them into even wilder movie pitches. Every week, we take a beer (or five), let our imaginations run drunk, and craft the most absurd, over-the-top, and occasionally Oscar-worthy cinematic concepts you’ve ever heard. From action-packed blockbusters to horror-fueled fever dreams and rom-coms with more foam than substance—nothing is off-limits.