Love Talks

Astera Brylka

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Want to learn more about romantic relationships? ......and how to make your present or future relationship or marriage happier and more fulfilling than the last one? In this podcast, we explore topics related to love, romantic relationships, and intimacy that we are all curious about but afraid to ask.

06.03.2021

A Treacherous Enemy Inside Me: My Endometriosis Story

Have you ever heard of endometriosis? Do you know anything about this chronic illness or have you just heard about it for the first time in your life? As March is the Endometriosis Awareness Month, I want to share my endo story with you. While this topic may seem to be far away from the love and relationships scope of this podcast, it really is not. Endometriosis often heavily affects romantic, sex, and family life of those that have been diagnosed, and I do not mean only women but their partners or husbands as well. Every 1 in 10 women of reproductive age in the UK—and these numbers are similar worldwide—is diagnosed with endometriosis. It is usually a long way to get this diagnosis confirmed, as on average it takes between 7 and 9 years. Endometriosis is a chronic condition in which endometrial-like tissue implants itself outside of the uterus, most commonly in diffeent parts of the reproductive system, but not only. Each case of endometriosis is different in terms of the symptoms that are present and their severity. However, the most typical symptoms of this illness include: • Painful and heavy periods; • Chronic pelvic pain, that lasts between periods; • Painful bowel movements, painful urination, and blood in urine; • Deep pain during sex; and • Chronic fatigue. If you want to learn more about endometriosis, and my story of being diagnosed and what this diagnosis changed in my life, this episode is for you!

34 Min.
23.02.2021

Gaslightning: An Alternate Reality in the Making

Gaslightning is one of the most common manipulation techniques that is used mainly by narcissists, though not only, to gain power over and control their partners or spouses, and be in charge of the dynamics of the whole relationship. The term comes from a stage play “Gas light” by Patrick Hamilton and the movie that was subsequently made (in the US, known as "Angel Street"). In the movie, the devious husband manipulates and torments his wife to convince her that she’s going mad. Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse where a person or group, makes another individual question their memories, sanity, and their perception of reality. It does not occur only in romantic relationships or marriages, but can take place in any relationship, including friendships, parent-child relationships, or employer-employee relationships. Have you ever been in a relationship with someone that made you doubt in what you were experiencing on a daily basis? Have you been confused to that extent that at some point you started question yourself and your sanity, and thought that you were losing touch with reality? - If you have ever had that strange feeling that you were or are living in an alternate reality to what you have been registering with your own senses, than it is more than likely that you have experienced gaslightning. Want to know more about gaslightning? Take a seat and and enjoy this episode!

27 Min.
16.02.2021

Intimacy: Tantra & Sex

The interest in tantric sex is now on the rise in the Western World. Originating in the ancient Indian and Chinese practices and philosophy, tantric sex is slow and meditative, with its end goal not being orgasm but the enjoyment coming from the sexual act and the sensations that this sexual journey brings to the body. The movement of the sexual energy that takes place during the act brings healing, transformation, and enlightenment. Tantric sex, however, requires intimacy between the partners. Without intimacy, sex hardly ever goes beyond being a physical, often barely mechanical, act that brings instant gratification. So how to prepare yourself and your partner for the deeper experience of tantric sex? My guest Anne Bland, the founder of SelfishlyHappyWoman.com and international love, relationship, and sex coach, and I will try to answer this and other questions related to tantra and sex in the today's episode.

26 Min.
09.02.2021

Intimacy: How to Communicate in a Relationship?

How you communicate with your partner or spouse is of key importance for the happiness of your relationship or marriage. Superficial communication; blockages in communication; not enough open (or overly open) communication in a relationship are the most common problems that copules struggle with. Such challanging and inadequate communication in a relationship or marriage have further casualties, one of them being intimacy. In this episode of the Love Talks, me and my guest Anne Bland, the founder of SelfishlyHappyWoman.com and international love, relationship, and sex coach, discuss what partners can do to improve their communication and, henceforth, deepen intimacy between them. This is part 1 of my talk with Anne, so stay tuned for another part coming out next week! In part 2 of our conversation, we will talk about intimacy in the context of tantra and sex.

27 Min.
02.02.2021

Intimacy Interrupted

Talking about intimacy with a partner or spouse is not easy for everyone. For some, it may even be a taboo topic. But intimacy, and talking about it with your partner or spouse when needed, is very important for the wellbeing of your relationship and marriage. Intimacy between two people that are married or in a committed relationship takes many forms, with physical and emotional intimacy being those that come to our minds first. What is physical and emotional intimacy then? What happens with a relationship when either one or both are gone? Is sex the same as physical intimacy? If you want to learn more about intimacy, why we struggle to bring this very important topic up in conversations with our partners or spouses, and what the most common reasons for having problems with intimacy in a relationship or marriage are, this episode will address all these questions for you!

25 Min.
26.01.2021

What Ghosts and Narcissists Have in Common?

Ghosting happens when someone that you have dated with or have had a committed relationship with, ends this relationship by cutting off all sort of communication with you, without giving you any explanation or closure. It is like receiving an ultimate silent treatment. While ghosting is usually chosen as the means for ending a rather new relation, it can be used to end even a long-term, committed relationship. These days this is not that unusual anymore and no-one can be really sure that they are save from being ghosted. So, who ghosts others? Some would say that ghosting is done by people that are bad and mean. But this would be a simplification. In fact, ghosting reflects the very core traits of the narcissistic personality disorder that is be characterised by: 👉🏼 A long-term pattern of exaggerated feelings of self-importance; 👉🏼 An excessive need for admiration; and 👉🏼 A lack of empathy for other people. If you recognise any of these in your boyfriend's or girlfriend's behaviour, you can be pretty much sure that you are dealing with the narcissist. And this also means that you have much higher chances to be ghosted by him or her than if you were dating a person who is not a narcissist. If you want to learn more about what ghosting is, why narcissists ghost others so easily, and what ghosting leaves behing, this episode will answer all your questions!

28 Min.
08.12.2020

Romantic Relationships Across Cultures

Marriages and comitted long-term relationships in which each partner comes from a different country and culture are these days not uncommon. With people easily moving around the world (well, at least before the COVID-19 outbreak) for work and study purposes, meeting a love of our life somewhere far away from our home country has become much more likely in the last 10-15 years than ever before. The expansion of the internet and a variety of different communication apps allow us stay in instant touch with our partner on a daily basis, even if we are thousands of miles apart from each other. The COVID-19 pandemic, although restricted our physical movement around the globe, has brought people together in the virtual space. Many of them would have never met otherwise, as they live in different countries or even on different continents, yet some have found their soulmates this way, amidst the outbreak and lockdown. But are the cross-cultural relationships that easy and carefree as they seem to be? How is it to have a partner or spouse whose cultural and often religious background differs from what we are used to and what is familiar (and predictable) to us? In this episode of the Love Talks, Ashish Parekh and I talked about the challanges and benefits of cross-cultural marriages with Melanie Goel from Germany 🇩🇪 , whose husband comes from India 🇮🇳. Melanie shared with us her insights and perspective on how to get well along as a couple regardless of the cultural and religious differences, and what mindset to adopt to make your cross-cultural relationship or marriage happy and fulfilling for both partners. She also offered some great tips on how to deal with some of the challanges that are pretty inevitable when people from different cultures fall in love with each other but which are possible to overcome and make the relationship even stronger in the long run.

38 Min.
01.12.2020

To Divorce or Not To Divorce?

What to do if no amount of work that we have dedicated to fixing our relationship or marriage seems to be enough? How to recognise that we have reached the point of no return and admitting that our relationship or marriage is not going to work no matter what is the most reasonable thing to do at that point? When should we let go and part with our partner or spouse? When enough is really enough? Making a decision about getting a divorce or breaking up a long-term relationship is never easy. In fact, this is the last resort that many of us would think of, even if we strongly feel and are aware that our relationship or marriage has been bringing to us (and our partner) more pain than joy for quite a long time. Giving up on a relationship or marriage is always a difficult decision that changes our lives and leaves a bitter aftertaste. It is always a loss that leaves deep marks on our souls. But, at the same time, a divorce or break up is not the end of the world and many divorced men and women alike still find a new romantic partner that they can have a happy life with. Many would say that for a man, it is much easier to make a decision about getting a divorce than for a women. It is commonly believed that women, especially when there are children involved, are less willing to think about divorcing their husbands or leaving a long-term partners, because of a variety of reasons. But is that really so? Are men really so much more ready to give up on a relationship or marriage easily? In this episode of the Love Talks, Ashish Parekh and I hosted Eric Chasen from the US 🇺🇸 and Sibin Varghese from India 🇮🇳 who shared with us their stories and described the process of getting to the point when they both realised that their marriages had ended and divorce was inevitable. We discussed: 🎯 How we can try to fix our marriage or long-term relationship beforestarting to consider a divorce or break up; 🎯 What are the common signs that a marriage or relationship is irreversibly broken and a divorce or break up is likely the most reasonable step to take; 🎯 How to handle emotionally a divorce and where to look for support; 🎯 What are the practicalities of the divorce process that one should take care of and how to do that; 🎯 How to achieve an agreement on the issues related to the custody of minor children; 🎯 How to co-parent with your ex-spouse or ex-partner for the benefit of your children.

47 Min.

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Love Talks

02.11.2020

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1 Min.

Want to learn more about romantic relationships? ......and how to make your present or future relationship or marriage happier and more fulfilling than the last one? In this podcast, we explore topics related to love, romantic relationships, and intimacy that we are all curious about but afraid to ask.

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Astera Brylka
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2020 - 2021
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