Never Was A Gamer

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A late-blooming gamer plays everyone else's formative games for the very first time.

  1. 24.02.2022

    Return to Mass Effect | Episode 53

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we're looking back at some of Michelle's formative games for once - the Mass Effect series, Bioware's space marine RPG trilogy. This is a long, rambly episode that is a bit of a change from our usual format, but we'll be back in 2 weeks with our last (more traditional) game episode, featuring the Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Oh, it's a legend alright! Enjoy and we'll talk soon.

  2. 20.01.2022

    Wrapping Up 2021 (and Final Fantasy Tactics) | Episode 52

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we're saying our last goodbyes to 2021 and the games we played.... including the last chapter of Final Fantasy Tactics! We briefly talk through the ending and what Tactics amounts to after 100 hours of playtime, then dig into some of the trends that shaped our 2021 in games, and finally conclude with some thoughts on the future of the show.  Timecodes: 0.00 Intro 1.38  Wrapping up Final Fantasy Tactics 19.00  "Games in Michelle's Wheelhouse" didn't really work 21.15  BREAK 22.00  Wrapping up our 2021 1.07.00  BREAK 1.07.30  The future of the show

  3. 06.01.2022

    Final Fantasy Tactics: Diorama fighter | Episode 51

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we're diving into Final Fantasy Tactics - or at least the first 3/4 of it!  Come on, Michelle's playtime is like 90 hours. Maybe we should have looked up the zodiac metrics after all.... Timecodes: 0.00  Intro 3.00  Tactics games 18.50  Final Fantasy Tactics context 46.30  BREAK 47.00  Final Fantasy-ness

  4. 23.12.2021

    Holiday Awards and Gift Exchange 2021 | Episode 50

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we're continuing our now-annual tradition of wrapping up the calendar year with a light episode of awards and a gift exchange. Dimitri and Michelle each gave each other a game that they thought the other would like, and so to break up the awards we're also discussing the sensational first-person photography shooter, "Umurangi Generation," and the high concept open world detective game, "Paradise Killer".  Stay safe and have a very cozy holiday! Timecodes: 0.00 Intro: Cozy December games (Unpacking, etc) 7.45  Awards: Naughtiest Boy 10.50  Bad Dad Award 12.35  Gamers Are Wrong Award 18.10  Katamari Damacy Presents: Second Best Soundtrack 22.00  BREAK 22.45  Gift Exchange: Michelle gets Umurangi Generation 39.20  BREAK 39.50  Hideo Kojima Memorial "Auteurist Trap" Award 43.30  Biggest Boss 46.05  Best Villain 47.30  True Villain 49.40  BREAK 50.10  Gift Exchange:  Dimitri gets Paradise Killer 1.12.00  BREAK 1.12.40  The Black Spot 1.15.45  Best Moment 1.18.30  Tier List: All Season 2 Games

  5. 09.12.2021

    Undertale: Alphys is not my friend | Episode 49

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we continue our year-end arc of games in Michelle's wheelhouse with the weird world of Undertale! There's so much to say about this game - not about Sans though. He's just a guy. We'll be back in 2 weeks with our holiday episode! Timecodes: 0.00  Intro 1.00  Michelle's history with Undertale 10.45  Actual history of Undertale 17.10  Starting over 31.30  BREAK 32.30  The battle system 47.40  The problem of Alphys (Mettaton rules) 59.30  Asgore, endings, and the big picture 1.14.00  Final thoughts

  6. 26.11.2021

    System Shock 2: You win some, you lose some | Episode 48

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we're discussing System Shock 2!... mostly the first 2 hours of it, because for the first time in the history of the show, we both bounced off the game (for very different reasons). We're digging into what we liked (lots!) and why we quit, and trying to think through the broader experience of bouncing off a game that you generally like. Please, come sit in our failures with us. Timecodes: 1.00  Why System Shock 2?    9.45  Immersive sims    13.00  5 times Michelle loved System Shock 2.... 40.00  ... and one time she didn't. 52.00  Dimitri's odyssey and conclusions 1.00.10  BREAK 1.00.40  Bouncing off good games 1.18.50  Final thoughts

  7. 28.10.2021

    Grab Bag: Spooky movie adaptaions - House of the Dead vs Resident Evil | Episode 47

    Today on Never Was A Gamer, we're capping off our licenced games arc with a grab bag episodes where we're discussing spooky movies that are based on spooky games (allegedly)! How does Resident Evil's lonely, tense survival horror aesthetic translate to film? What does 'House of the Dead' branding add to your basic zombie flick? We'll never know because the directors didn't think about any of that! Here's what they did instead.  Timecodes:  1.00  Grab Bag: Spooky movies based on games 2.00  Silent Hill 2 update! 7:30  House of the Dead (2003) 52.00  BREAK 52.40  Resident Evil (2002) 1.22.30  Final thoughts Programming Note: We're taking a short break to give Michelle time to get ahead on some of the pretty big games we'll be discussing in our final arc of the season. There won't be a new episode on November 11, but we'll be back on November 25 with System Shock 2! See you then.

  8. 14.10.2021

    Batman: Arkham Asylum - Indoor Gargoyles Are Good | Episode 46

    Today we're rounding out our licenced games arc with a game that Dimitri provocatively and immediately calls "one of the 5 most influential games of the last 10 or 15 years," Batman: Arkham Asylum. Provocative! Meanwhile, Michelle provocatively defends Poison Ivy. Lotta takes in this one.  Timecodes: 1.45  Our histories with Batman games 9.30  What is Batman: Arkham Asylum? 13.00  This game's innovations 35.00  BREAK 35.30  Villains and story 1.18.30  Final thoughts

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A late-blooming gamer plays everyone else's formative games for the very first time.

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