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Karlee Coffey and Chelsea Disanto
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If it makes people uncomfortable, we’re probably talking about it. Tackling the topics that start fights at dinner tables and get deleted in comment sections. Nothing is off limits — but everything is examined. Smart, unfiltered, and willing to challenge ideas in real time. Want to share your most pivotal moment in life good or bad? Have a story you want us to share and talk about? Have ideas or topics you want discussed? Email me at karlee.coffey@gmail.com

Episodes

  1. Season Finale! Kids Say The Darndest Things!

    3 DAYS AGO

    Season Finale! Kids Say The Darndest Things!

    This episode is filled with precious conversations with my son over the years. We dive into important topics from porn all the way to hard conversations regarding the relationships Nathan and I had throughout his life. These are vulnerable moments and used with consent. Let's normalize seeing our kids where they are and meeting them there to grow and learn. I hope this makes someone smile and also reflect that parenting is hard and we all do it differently! Again, please subscribe to our podcast on whatever platform you use and rate it too! This helps us grow and share important topics that help people feel less alone!

    32 min
  2. How Many Times I Had to Become Someone New

    26 APR

    How Many Times I Had to Become Someone New

    There are lives that look linear from the outside—one version of a woman, one story, one identity. And then there are lives like mine: built from ashes, rupture, reinvention. This episode is about every version of me that had to die so I could keep going—the girl raised inside fear and control, the survivor, the athlete, the mother, the woman who kept rebuilding after trauma, loss, abuse, heartbreak, betrayal, addiction, grief, and the kind of pain that doesn’t just break you… it demands evolution. “How Many Times I Had to Become Someone New” is about identity shaped through survival—about shedding skin so many times you stop asking, “Why me?” and start asking, “Who am I now?” This is for anyone who has ever had to mourn who they were while fighting to become who they needed to be. Not a story of breaking. A story of becoming.

    59 min
  3. What Does Addiction Look Like?

    20 APR

    What Does Addiction Look Like?

    Addiction is so much more complicated than people want to admit. It is not always the stereotype people picture—it can look like success, chaos, control, isolation, humor, functioning, denial, or survival. This week we talk about the emotional reality underneath it all: trauma, shame, secrecy, loneliness, relapse, coping, and the ways people try to numb what feels impossible to carry. We also get honest about recovery—how messy it can be, what actually motivates change, and why people deserve compassion instead of judgment. This one is raw, heavy, and important. https://smartrecovery.org/meeting https://www.aa.org

    48 min
  4. Beyond the Myths of Sex Work

    10 APR

    Beyond the Myths of Sex Work

    This week we’re diving into the world of sex work and stripping—unpacking the stigma, stereotypes, and endless misconceptions that surround an industry everyone seems to have opinions about but few truly understand. Through three interviews with guests from different perspectives, we explore the realities behind the myths, the sense of community that exists within the industry, and the ways society often dehumanizes what it refuses to fully understand. Morgan Hay: morganhay@morganhay.com Vicki Shadowline on Instagram vickyshadowline@gmail.com Ross Dexter on Instagram @rossisrollin DV8 on Instagram @dv8_club Elle Stanger on Instagram @stripperwriter Etiquette Tips: https://www.salient.org.nz/post/strip-club-etiquette

    1hr 40min

  5. 4 APR

    Red Flags We Romanticized

    Romanticizing red flags is basically our brain’s way of turning warning signs into personality traits we think we can “handle.” In this episode, we unpack the behaviors we once excused—emotional unavailability, inconsistency, intensity that felt like passion—and why they can feel so intoxicating in the moment. With humor and a little honesty, we explore the difference between chemistry and chaos, and what it actually takes to stop confusing the two. Attached Audio Book Below https://www.audible.com/pd/Attached-Audiobook/0593171667?ipRedirectOverride=true&overrideBaseCountry=true&bp_o=true&language=en_US&source_code=GPAPP30DTRIAL5480813240005&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=23058120608&gclid=Cj0KCQjw7cLOBhDmARIsAGsuA0npw0iQX38G5s_eR4ApanuBnN2YLiWEGtOCo_eOvDYU0HKxG9Ma8y0aAjn7EALw_wcB Music credits to Alright Alright based in Denver, CO.

    1hr 18min
  6. Contradiction in Desire

    30 MAR

    Contradiction in Desire

    Desire is full of contradictions—we crave closeness but fear losing ourselves, want passion but also stability, chase novelty while longing for safety. The very things that attract us can eventually unsettle us: independence can feel like distance, and reliability can feel like boredom. In relationships, this creates a quiet tension where we’re constantly balancing opposing needs, often without realizing it. Learning to hold both sides—to want connection and autonomy, excitement and security—is where deeper, more conscious love begins. Link for the Documentary about Portland, OR strip club culture. https://www.primevideo.com/detail/Cheers-Portland-the-Strip-Club-Capital-of-America/0P2DVUFUCWRKAODS4T3XZWBLCJ Perel, E. (2006). Mating in captivity: Unlocking erotic intelligence. HarperCollins. Music by Alright Alright

    53 min
  7. Unending topic of trauma

    22 MAR

    Unending topic of trauma

    Trigger Warning: Emotional, Physical, and Sexual Trauma This week’s episode isn’t exactly “light and breezy,” but we do manage to sprinkle in just enough humor to make the heavy stuff a little more bearable. We’re talking emotional, physical, and sexual trauma—how it shows up, how it sticks around, and how our brains do some truly creative things to try to protect us. It’s honest, a little raw, and somehow still feels like sitting with someone who gets it (and maybe even cracks a well-timed, slightly inappropriate joke). If this brings anything up for you, you’re not alone—and support is available: • National Sexual Assault Hotline (RAINN): 1-800-656-HOPE or rainn.org (chat available) • National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 or thehotline.org • If you’re in immediate danger, call 911 Take what you need, skip what you don’t, and be gentle with yourself. 💛

    40 min
  8. You don’t have trauma??

    16 MAR

    You don’t have trauma??

    Early and invisible trauma wounds from our family of origin shape so much of how we move through the world—how we love, how we protect ourselves, how we communicate, and what feels safe or unsafe in relationship. These wounds are often quiet, buried beneath survival patterns we don’t even realize we carry, yet they can show up in our friendships, romantic relationships, parenting, and sense of self. In this episode, I’m exploring how those early experiences live on in the body and nervous system, and how healing begins with bringing compassion and awareness to the parts of us that learned to survive first. Details of article: Şar, V. (2025, October). From attachment to trauma to traumatic attachment: Invisible injuries of early childhood and subtle relational codes of self-regulation. Clinical Neuropsychiatry: Journal of Treatment Evaluation, 22(5), 417–422.

    40 min
  9. Update and bridge to next episodes.

    12 MAR

    Update and bridge to next episodes.

    Relationships don’t happen in a vacuum—they’re shaped by the systems we grow up in. The patriarchy quietly scripts a lot of our expectations: who leads, who sacrifices, who holds the emotional labor, and whose needs get prioritized. Those patterns show up whether we’re talking about monogamy, polyamory, or friendship dynamics. And layered on top of that is trauma—old wounds that live in our nervous systems and influence how safe we feel with other people. Trauma can make us hyper-independent, overly accommodating, or constantly scanning for signs we’ll be hurt again. It changes how we trust, how we set boundaries, and how we show up in love and friendship alike. In this conversation, Karlee shares her own experience with relationship trauma and how it shaped the way she understands connection, safety, and healing today.

    40 min
  10. Relationship ish.

    9 MAR

    Relationship ish.

    In this episode, we dive headfirst into the messy, complicated and sometimes uncomfortable world of love, sex, and relationship styles—from traditional monogamy to polyamory to ethical non-monogamy and everything in between. Nothing is off limits. We question the rules we were all handed about dating, marriage, jealousy, commitment, and whether humans were ever meant to follow just one script.

    39 min
  11. Men.

    28 FEB

    Men.

    In this episode, we take on one of the most charged conversations of our time: men and the patriarchy. What does patriarchy actually mean beyond the buzzword? How does it shape men’s identities, relationships, emotional lives, and sense of worth? And who does it ultimately serve — and harm?

    40 min
  • 11 Episodes

About

If it makes people uncomfortable, we’re probably talking about it. Tackling the topics that start fights at dinner tables and get deleted in comment sections. Nothing is off limits — but everything is examined. Smart, unfiltered, and willing to challenge ideas in real time. Want to share your most pivotal moment in life good or bad? Have a story you want us to share and talk about? Have ideas or topics you want discussed? Email me at karlee.coffey@gmail.com

Information

  • Creator
    Karlee Coffey and Chelsea Disanto
  • Years Active
    2k
  • Episodes
    11
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Karlee Coffey 2026
  • Show Website
    Pause. A Podcast.

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