Raising Men

Shaun Dawson
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Raising Men is a podcast about parenting, masculinity, and the lifelong journey of raising sons—and ourselves—to be men of courage, character, and purpose. Hosted by Shaun Dawson, each episode features real conversations with parents, leaders, and thinkers redefining what it means to raising men in today’s world.

  1. From Chaos to Calm: Devon Kuntzman on Thriving Through Toddlerhood

    5 DAYS AGO

    From Chaos to Calm: Devon Kuntzman on Thriving Through Toddlerhood

    If you’ve ever had a toddler throw themselves on the floor because you cut their toast the wrong way, you know how intense those early years can be. But what if toddlerhood isn’t something to survive? What if it’s one of the richest seasons for growth—both for our kids and for us? Today on Raising Men, Shaun sits down with Devon Kuntzman, parenting coach, author of Transforming Toddlerhood, and the leading voice helping parents move from chaos to connection. Devon brings practical tools, mindset reframes, and compassionate strategies that help parents decode behavior, regulate themselves, and raise confident, emotionally healthy kids. Key Takeaways 1. Reframing the “Terrible Twos”: Why culture primes us to expect chaos, and how fear shapes our experience of toddlerhood.  2. Behavior as Communication:  Toddlers aren’t being “bad”—they’re expressing needs, emotions, and limitations in brain development.  3. Emotional Regulation for Parents:  How to avoid jumping on your child’s “emotional roller coaster.”  4. Healthy, Developmentally Smart Discipline:  Limits + connection + teaching skills = effective discipline.  5. Collaboration, Not Control:  Using collaborative problem-solving with older toddlers (3–4+) to create buy-in and reduce conflict.  All behavior is communication. Toddlers aren’t being bad—they’re having a hard time. Control is an illusion. Parenting through fear creates compliance, not skills. Practice makes progress. Every moment is another chance to try again.Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — Observe and Describe, Not Catastrophise 00:30 — Welcome & Meet Devin Kuntzman 01:05 — Rethinking the “Terrible Twos” 02:04 — When We Look for Problems, We Find Them 03:10 — Problems as Opportunities for Growth 03:38 — Toddlerhood as a Critical Developmental Window 04:35 — Younger vs. Older Toddlers 05:31 — Behaviour Is Communication 06:20 — Lower Brain vs. Upper Brain 07:04 — Why Toddlers Aren’t Manipulating You 08:10 — Staying Out of the Emotional Roller Coaster 08:56 — Establish Safety First 09:40 — The Fear Loop Parents Fall Into 10:40 — Ego, Judgment, and Parenting Stress 11:25 — Observe and Describe in Action 12:47 — Teaching Skills Instead of Punishing Behaviour 13:35 — Responding Differently Based on Intensity 14:22 — Emotional Skills Are Still Skills 15:20 — Tantrums and Loss of Control 16:34 — Less Is More During Meltdowns 17:40 — Moving Forward After Setting a Limit 18:31 — Logical vs. Arbitrary Consequences 20:31 — Waiting Until the Brain Comes Back Online 22:30 — Fear-Based Compliance vs. Skill Building 24:02 — Regulating Yourself First 25:10 — Practical Grounding Techniques for Parents 26:15 — Repairing After You Lose It 28:02 — The Four-Step Repair Process 30:13 — “Wind the Clock” 31:32 — Disrupting the Stress Cycle 32:40 — Giving Yourself Grace as a Parent 33:51 — Windshield vs. Rearview Mirror Parenting 35:00 — Control vs. Connection 35:43 — When Control Becomes an Illusion 37:58 — Compliance, Fear, and Hiding Behaviour 39:20 — What Positive Discipline Really Means 39:54 — Meeting Needs Within Limits 41:36 — Collaborative Problem Solving 43:40 — Coaching Instead of Refereeing 45:45 — Why Feeling Seen Changes Everything 46:45 — One Operating Principle: Everyone Is Doing Their Best 47:29 — Closing Reflections Supporting Content Transforming Toddlerhood (Book) — https://transformingtoddlerhood.com/book/(Referenced throughout the episode as Devon discusses its chapters, frameworks, and principles.) raising-men-recording-with-devo…Transforming Toddlerhood (Website) — https://www.transformingtoddlerhood.com/Instagram: @transformingtoddlerhood — https://www.instagram.com/transformingtoddlerhood/Frameworks Mentioned Observe & Describe — Nonjudgmental narration to interrupt assumptions. Recipe for Healthy, Effective Discipline:ConnectionLimitFollow-throughTeaching skills Four-Step Repair Process (from Devon’s book, pg. ~49): Take ownershipCheck in on impactApologizeRedo (state what you’ll do next time) Concepts Referenced Younger vs. Older Toddlers (ages 1–2 vs. 3–4, differences in language + brain maturity)Collaborative Problem Solving — Inviting toddlers to generate solutions. Emotional Contagion — Why parent regulation is the first step in child regulation. Logical vs. Arbitrary Consequences — And why toddlers don’t connect punishment with behavior. Grounding Strategies for Parents — Breathing, sensory check-ins, movement or stillness based on temperament.

    48 min
  2. What Trauma-Informed Parenting Looks Like at Home with Ryan North

    25 FEB

    What Trauma-Informed Parenting Looks Like at Home with Ryan North

    Ryan North, co-founder of One Big Happy Home, shares his journey raising six children—four of whom were adopted from the child welfare system—and how those experiences shaped his trauma-informed approach to parenting. This episode explores the "connection-first" methodology, the essential balance between nurture and structure, and the vital distinction between raising "nice" boys and "good" men. 1. Why Trauma-Informed Parenting Matters for Every Dad Ryan explains why trauma-informed principles apply far beyond adoption and foster care — because every child faces adversity, stress, and emotional wounds in today’s world.  2. Connection vs. Control Ryan breaks down why traditional discipline focuses on control, but healing and strong fatherhood come from prioritizing connection — without sliding into permissiveness.  3. The Power of “Yes When We Can, No When We Must” He shares the philosophy that shaped his home: saying yes when it builds relationship, and saying no only when it’s truly in the child’s long-term best interest.  4. Raising Boys in a Digital, Post-Pandemic, AI-Distracted World From screen addiction to AI “companions,” Ryan reveals why today is the hardest era in 100+ years to be a child — and how dads can anchor their sons in stability, presence, and emotional safety. r 5. What It Means to Raise Good Men (Not Just “Nice” Ones) Ryan draws a powerful distinction between “nice” men and “good” men — and how fathers can raise sons who protect, provide, and lead with courage and compassion. Quotes by Ryan North “Authority isn’t about control — it’s about trust.” “The point of parenting is not to make my life easy — the point of parenting is to develop another person.” “We’re not trying to raise nice men. We’re trying to raise good men — the kind who run into the burning building, not film it for likes.” Timestamps  00:00 — Holding Kids to Adult Standards 00:30 — Welcome & Meet Ryan North 01:10 — What Drew Ryan Into Trauma-Informed Care 02:10 — Parenting Adopted and Biological Children the Same Way 03:20 — Connection vs. Compliance 04:17 — Why This Isn’t Permissive Parenting 05:10 — Parenting Isn’t Meant to Be Convenient 06:06 — Saying Yes When You Can, No When You Must 07:24 — The Swaddling Metaphor 08:20 — Secure Attachment Creates Confident Exploration 10:04 — Proof of Concept: Parenting Over Time 12:19 — Challenging Limiting Labels 12:46 — Small Traumas Still Matter 13:30 — Harmful Parenting Beliefs We Inherit 14:42 — Children Are Fragile and Capable of Resilience 15:55 — Parenting in a Digital, AI-Driven World 17:51 — Trauma vs. Adversity 18:45 — You’re the Parent, Not Their Friend 19:09 — Authority Without Fear or Control 20:15 — Screen Boundaries Explained, Not Enforced 21:30 — Calm Presence in Conflict 23:13 — Saying Yes to Needs, Not Wants 25:15 — Withholding Connection Is Not Discipline 27:12 — Defiance vs. Addiction 29:09 — Behaviour Is Communication 30:41 — Why “Crying It Out” Causes Harm 32:40 — How Behaviour Becomes a Strategy 35:29 — Teaching Independence Through Dependence 37:15 — The Danger of Raising “Nice” Men 39:01 — Raising Men Who Protect and Lead 41:02 — Protection, Provision, and Presence 42:53 — Male Mental Health and Suicide 44:45 — Choosing the Right Partner Matters 47:09 — Parenting as a Partnership 48:35 — The “Pineapple” Exit Strategy 50:00 — Planning Outside the Moment 53:12 — Kids Learn What We Model 55:10 — Teaching the Art of Repair 57:33 — Repairing Relationships After Rupture 01:01:48 — What a “Happy Home” Really Means 01:02:48 — Operating Principle: Curiosity Over Judgment 01:03:17 — Final Reflections 01:05:07 — Closing Credits Supporting Content Secure Base / Attachment Research – foundational attachment science discussed when exploring dependence → independence.Nurture + Structure = Felt Safety – illustrated through the “baby swaddle” metaphor.“Yes When We Can, No When We Must” Parenting Framework — Ryan’s family rule.“Pineapple Strategy” – A pre-agreed cue between Ryan and his wife to step out of heated moments with dignity.Apology Framework (Own it → Say sorry → Ask forgiveness → Commit to do better) — modeled to his children and now mirrored back by them.The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/730610/the-anxious-generation-by-jonathan-haidt/One Big Happy Home Website https://www.onebighappyhome.com/One Big Happy Home Podcast https://www.onebighappyhome.com/podcast/

    1h 5m
  3. Fathers, Sons, and the Lost Language of Emotion with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst

    18 FEB

    Fathers, Sons, and the Lost Language of Emotion with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst

    In this episode, Shaun sits down with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, a psychologist with decades of experience working with preschool boys often mislabeled as "problematic". They explore the "emotional desert" many boys are forced into by a culture that unintentionally shames their natural sensitivity. Dr. Vanderhorst explains how parents can move beyond surface-level behavior to address the root emotional needs of their sons, ultimately helping them grow into men of both strength and tenderness. Key Takeaways The Myth of the Stoic Infant: Contrary to popular belief, boys are born with a broader range of emotional expression than girls. However, because mothers and nannies often have a narrower emotional range, they may unintentionally discourage a boy's intense reactions, leading the infant to "narrow the room" and limit his own expressions for safety.Comfort vs. Brittleness: Shaming a boy for crying (e.g., telling a three-year-old to "stop being a baby") does not make him strong; it makes him "brittle". Providing comfort and strategies for handling injury or loss builds genuine resilience, allowing him to experience emotion without being overwhelmed by it.The "Conan" Brain vs. The Modern World: Society often trains boys to remain in a "Conan the Barbarian" state—aggressive, brave, and cut off from fear. While this was once adaptive for survival, it is maladaptive in modern life, making intimate emotional relationships nearly impossible for men who can only access irritation or anger.The Masculine Ritual of Safety: Unlike women, who often dive directly into emotional sharing, men typically require a "ritual" of posturing before feeling safe. They often need to establish their status or success in the room before they feel comfortable enough to bring their sorrows or worries into the light.Decoding the "Root Cause": Behavioral outbursts are often signals of underlying needs. For example, a child obsessing over a cell phone or a specific shirt may actually be expressing a powerful need to "belong" or feel included with their peers. Addressing the root cause can "flip the switch" and resolve the behavioral conflict immediately.Pull Quotes "Infants are emotionally brilliant—it's their only survival mechanism. So they read the room perfectly." "The culture that we live in tells us that boys are to narrow their emotional expression... We rob them of that capability, and we do it intentionally." "If you don't do it on purpose [reflection], it'll happen accidentally in ways that are usually bad." Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — Therapy Is More Accessible Than You Think 00:40 — Meet Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst 01:20 — The Emotional Desert Boys Grow Up In 02:02 — Boys Are Born With a Broader Emotional Spectrum 03:15 — How Caregiving Shapes Emotional Expression 04:17 — A Classroom Example: Male vs. Female Emotional Response 05:46 — Emotional Correction Starts in Infancy 07:40 — Playground Parenting Reveals the Pattern 08:18 — Emotional Sensitivity Is a Male Strength 09:25 — When Culture Mislabels Emotion as a Problem 11:05 — The Caveman Model of Masculinity 11:48 — Conan the Barbarian vs. Sherlock Holmes 13:44 — The Cost of Losing Tenderness 14:12 — Anger as a Secondary Emotion 15:36 — Why Anger Doesn’t Solve Modern Problems 16:20 — The Core Emotional Wound in Men 17:01 — Divorce, Prison, and Emotional Silence 18:03 — Why Men Don’t Disclose to Other Men 18:15 — Masculinity, Power, and the Fear of Softness 19:37 — You Don’t Lose Strength—You Add to It 20:45 — Introducing the Book: Read, Reflect, Respond 21:39 — Why Words Aren’t Enough for Healing 22:37 — Scribbling, Drawing, and Emotional Truth 23:14 — “Are You Your Own Con Artist?” 24:33 — When Unprocessed History Hijacks the Present 25:51 — The Danger of Justifying Pain Instead of Healing It 27:23 — Therapy Beyond the Couch 29:06 — Men, Therapy, and Community 29:58 — Posturing Before Vulnerability 31:45 — Rituals of Emotional Safety for Men 32:52 — Emotional Safety vs. Physical Safety 33:34 — First Steps for Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys 35:20 — A Story of Shame at the Playground 36:05 — Why Suppressing Emotion Creates Fragility 36:45 — Suicide and Emotional Suppression 37:57 — Is Emotional Progress Happening? 38:44 — The Hidden Cost of Screens 39:45 — The Uncontrolled Experiment on Children 41:03 — Limits Aren’t Enough—Engagement Matters 42:34 — Creativity as Emotional Nutrition 44:24 — Addressing the Root Need: Belonging 45:07 — Meeting Needs Without Giving the Device 46:00 — A Shirt, a Buffet, and Emotional Insight 47:23 — Belonging as a Core Emotional Theme 48:31 — Helping Kids Reframe Differences as Strengths 49:41 — One Operating Principle: Expand Feeling Vocabulary 50:51 — Emotions as a Learnable Language 51:48 — Building Emotional Rituals at Home 52:50 — Closing Reflections Resources, Links, and Concepts Mentioned Book: Read Reflect Respond: The 3 R's of Growth and Change by Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst https://www.amazon.com/Read-Reflect-Respond-Growth-Change/dp/1633023036Internal Family Systems (IFS) – A therapeutic process for understanding the different "parts" of oneself, now increasingly accessible to the public through online workshops.Social Media & Connections Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst: Follow her weekly blog and access resources through her official website at https://gloriavanderhorst.com

    53 min
  4. Regulate Before You Relate: The Inner Work of Raising Men with Jonny Miller

    11 FEB

    Regulate Before You Relate: The Inner Work of Raising Men with Jonny Miller

    In this episode, Shaun sits down with Jonny Miller, the founder of Nervous System Mastery and host of The Inner Frontier Podcast. As a tech leader and father of two, Shaun explores the messy reality of staying regulated when kids push every "magic button" we have. Jonny reframes the nervous system not as something to be "beaten into submission," but as the primary lens through which we experience our relationships, our creativity, and our capacity to lead our families. Key Takeaways The Nervous System is the "Upstream" Lens: Your nervous system dictates the quality of your attention, relationships, and creativity. Rather than a victim-to-villain dynamic where you must "grind" through stress, mastery is about befriending the system and understanding that your kids' nervous systems are often a direct reflection of your own.Interoception is the Lead Domino: Most men are "numb from the neck down," missing the internal data (heat in the chest, sweating palms) that signals rising anger. By noticing these sensations when they are a "2 or 3 out of 10" rather than an "11 out of 10" rage blackout, you gain the agency to intervene before reacting.Reducing the "Half-Life" of Reactivity: The goal is not to never be triggered, but to reduce how long you stay in a hijacked state. Instead of carrying unprocessed grief or anger for days or weeks, nervous system skills allow you to move back into your "window of tolerance" in minutes.Bottom-Up vs. Top-Down Regulation: While we often try to "think" our way out of stress (top-down), there are four times more neurons going from the body to the brain than vice-versa. Leveraging "bottom-up" tools like breathwork, humming, or cold exposure is a high-leverage way to signal safety to the brain when the mind is racing.Paying Off "Emotional Debt": Repressing emotions to "get the job done" (the Clint Eastwood model) builds a debt that eventually leads to burnout or health crises. Shifting from "grinding" to "courageous curiosity" allows men to metabolize this debt and reclaim a sense of aliveness and joy.Quotes from Jonny Miller "The nervous system is quite literally the lens through which we experience life." "Joy is the matriarch of a family of emotions, and she won't come into a house where her children aren't welcome." "All leadership is ultimately self-leadership." Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — Kids and Emotional Fluidity 00:27 — What Is Nervous System Mastery? 01:53 — Grit, Hustle, and the Problem With Suppression 03:59 — Reducing the Half-Life of Reactivity 05:51 — Leadership Starts With Self-Regulation 07:09 — When Kids Trigger What We Can’t Control 09:09 — Why We Try to Fix Other People’s Emotions 10:57 — Interoception: Awareness of the Inner World 12:48 — Interoception vs. Introspection 13:30 — The Daily “Internal Weather Report” 15:48 — Parenting in the Weeds 17:40 — Curiosity Without Judgment 19:06 — Emotional Fluidity vs. Emotional Manipulation 20:44 — Kids Learn What We Model, Not What We Say 21:30 — Teaching Children to Trust Their Inner Signals 22:48 — Practicing Awareness Throughout the Day 24:45 — NSDR (Non-Sleep Deep Rest) 26:07 — Where to Learn NSDR 28:03 — Top-Down vs. Bottom-Up Regulation 29:36 — Why Body-Based Practices Work Better 30:46 — Outside-In Regulation: Designing Your Environment 32:18 — Co-Regulation: Why Connection Heals 34:16 — Anxiety as Constriction 36:13 — Emotional Debt and Burnout 37:37 — What Changes for High-Achieving Men 39:34 — Deep Somatic Work and Emotional Excavation 41:18 — Making Time Creates More Time 41:33 — One Practice for Immediate Regulation 43:34 — Boundaries, Calendars, and Spaciousness 45:08 — Presence as a Competitive Advantage 47:06 — Distraction, Rage Bait, and Emotional Hooking 49:21 — Interoception as an Antidote to Screens 51:36 — The Opportunity Hidden in Modern Overstimulation 53:13 — One Operating Principle: Embrace Emotional Intensity 54:23 — Regulating Kids by Regulating Ourselves 55:14 — Making Space for Anger 56:33 — Screaming Together: A Story of Co-Regulation 57:25 — Closing Reflections Resources, Tools, & Concepts Mentioned NSDR (Non-Sleep Deep Rest): A guided body scan popularized by Andrew Huberman that provides the recovery equivalent of two hours of sleep in just 30 minutes.State Shifts: An app featuring recordings for nervous system regulation.Physiological Sigh: A breathing protocol used to rapidly down-regulate the system.Orienting Practice: A quick grounding tool: name three things you see, two you hear, and one you feel.Yoga Nidra: A restorative practice for cultivating high-definition internal awareness.People to Follow: Andrew Huberman: For the science of NSDR and the physiological sigh.Ally Boothroyd: Recommended for her Yoga Nidra recordings on YouTube.Joe Hudson: Creator of the "Joy as the Matriarch" metaphor.Where to find Jonny:  Website: https://nsmastery.com/Podcast: The Inner Frontier https://open.spotify.com/show/1lGD5wIfhnE4bepja42C9S

    58 min
  5. Why Boys Are Falling Behind (and What We Can Do About It) with Steve Biddulph

    4 FEB

    Why Boys Are Falling Behind (and What We Can Do About It) with Steve Biddulph

    In this episode, Shaun Dawson sits down with Steve Biddulph, a world-renowned psychologist, educator, and author of the global bestsellers Raising Boys and The New Manhood. With over three decades of experience, Steve explores the "quiet crisis" facing boys today—from school environments that disadvantage their slower biological development to a digital landscape that is rewriting the rules of adolescence. This conversation is a roadmap for parents who want to raise emotionally healthy sons of character, courage, and conviction. Key Takeaways The Biological Development Gap: Testosterone in the womb slows male development; by the time boys reach school age, they are often 6 to 12 months behind girls in speech and fine motor skills.The Case for "Holding Back": Many boys benefit significantly from starting school one year later, allowing them to match the maturity of their female peers and avoid a lifelong trajectory of restlessness and academic discouragement.Mirror Learning & Masculine Virtues: Qualities like patience and kindness are "caught, not taught." Boys need thousands of hours of male company to absorb these complex, nonverbal skills through their nervous systems.Combating Digital Miseducation: Parents must actively counter the harmful "algorithmic" effects of social media and the "miseducation" of pornography by setting firm boundaries—such as no devices in bedrooms and supporting under-16 social media bans.The Father as a Safety Anchor: A father’s most important role is to be a "safety go-to guy". True strength lies in a father’s ability to manage his own strong feelings so his son never feels the need to protect himself from his own father.Quotes  "You give a man the right help, he will turn around." "I made sure he knew what a good man looked like because you can't turn into one if you've never seen one." (Quoting a single mother’s wisdom on role models) "A good kid is a still kid... but his body's screaming." (On the physical difficulty boys face sitting at desks in traditional classrooms) Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — “That Book Saved My Life” 00:34 — The Quiet Crisis Facing Boys 01:12 — Meet Steve Biddulph 01:56 — The Family Therapy Breakthrough 03:59 — Fathers Who Loved but Couldn’t Connect 4:47 — Personal Grief and the Awakening 06:11 — When Men Don’t Know How to Support Each Other 07:28 — Why Boys Start School at a Disadvantage 08:26 — Testosterone Slows Male Development 09:45 — Boys Are Born Vulnerable 10:38 — A One-Year Developmental Gap 11:55 — Language, Fine Motor Skills, and Shame 12:28 — “Just Hold Him Back a Year” 13:33 — Sean’s Story: Skipped Grades and Silent Anxiety 15:30 — The Power of Repeating a Year 16:23 — When Big Bodies Create Unrealistic Expectations 17:44 — How Boys’ Bodies Develop 18:28 — “Move Me” 19:29 — What Boy-Friendly Schools Do Differently 20:58 — Father Absence and Modern Reality 21:26 — Single Mothers Have Always Raised Good Men 23:05 — “He Needs to See What a Good Man Looks Like” 25:09 — Recruiting Male Role Models 27:04 — Men Will Say Yes When Asked 28:10 — What Makes a “Good Man”? 29:18 — Patience Is a Physical Skill 30:50 — Mirror Learning and Role Modelling 31:46 — The Digital Wild West 33:22 — Australia’s Under-16 Social Media Ban 35:06 — Parenting Against the Herd 36:55 — Talking to Kids About Pornography 38:23 — Devices Out of Bedrooms 39:40 — One Operating Principle for Raising Men 40:23 — Hurt Creates Hurt 41:00 — Be Your Child’s Safe Place 41:51 — Final Reflections 42:39 — Closing Credits Resources, Concepts, and Books Mentioned Raising Boys in the 21st Century by Steve Biddulph https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Raising-Boys-in-the-21st-Century/Steve-Biddulph/9780648226734The New Manhood by Steve Biddulph https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-New-Manhood/Steve-Biddulph/9781760851156Iron John: A Book About Men by Robert Bly https://www.amazon.com/Iron-John-Book-About-Men/dp/0306813769Father Hunger / The Father Wound: The deep psychological impact of an absent or emotionally distant fatherMirror Learning: The process by which children absorb behaviors and emotional rhythms by observing role modelsCore Strength vs. Fine Motor Development: The biological difference where boys develop from the "core outwards," meaning finger control for writing often develops last.Heads Up Alliance: https://www.headsup.org.uk/ A movement encouraging school communities to delay giving children smartphones.Connect with Steve Biddulph Website: https://www.stevebiddulph.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/stevebiddulphraisingboysRaising Girls community https://www.facebook.com/stevebiddulphraisinggirlsRaising Boys community https://www.facebook.com/pages/Steve-Biddulphs-Raising-Boys/673349469396922

    43 min
  6. Battles Before the Battlefield: Aaron Blaine on Becoming the Father He Never Had

    28 JAN

    Battles Before the Battlefield: Aaron Blaine on Becoming the Father He Never Had

    Retired Green Beret and Wild Ops Box founder Aaron Blaine joins Raising Men to talk about the battles he faced long before combat — growing up fatherless, angry, and adrift — and how pain, discipline, and purpose forged him into the man and father he is today. In this conversation, Aaron and Shaun unpack lessons from military life, the transition back home, and the inner healing that led to his mission of helping fathers and sons reconnect through Wild Ops Box. From men’s circles and emotional breakthroughs to teaching his kids the power of boundaries, Aaron shows that leadership at home begins with self-awareness and service Key Takeaways Pain can be a catalyst for growth — our response determines whether it breaks us or builds us.Kids mirror our emotions — a calm home starts with calm parents.Boundaries are love — saying no teaches children self-respect and limits.Connection needs structure — rituals, shared experiences, and written family values keep a home aligned.Service above self — true masculinity means protecting, guiding, and serving before leading. Pull Quotes “You get to choose what it does to you. You get to choose how you react — that’s an active choice that can propel you forward.” “We make vows to our wives, but maybe we should make vows to our kids — that’s the most permanent relationship we’ll ever have.” “Discipline without direction is just control — but discipline with purpose changes lives. “Kids don’t care what we say; it’s what they see and feel us do that really matters.”Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — Leading From the Front at Home Why allowing kids to shape the vision of the household builds accountability and leadership. 00:31 — From Fatherless to Green Beret Aaron Blaine’s early life, losing his father, and the path that shaped his resilience. 02:03 — Trauma as a Catalyst for Growth How pain, loss, and chaos became fuel instead of a life sentence. 05:57 — Choosing Growth Over Destruction Why adversity can either break you—or make you great. 07:18 — Legacy Lives Beyond Presence How parents continue shaping us long after they’re gone. 09:16 — Birth, Death, and the Urgency of Time A powerful reflection on life’s brevity and what truly matters. 11:11 — Service Above Self Why volunteering, slowing down, and gratitude change everything. 13:00 — Redefining Wellness: Body, Mind, and Spirit Why true health goes far beyond fitness. 14:22 — What Becoming a Green Beret Teaches About Discipline Autonomy, self-mastery, and learning to embrace discomfort. 18:52 — Anger, Fatherhood, and Emotional Regulation How Aaron learned to manage anger while raising young children. 20:54 — The Men’s Group That Changed Everything Vulnerability, emotional awareness, and breaking lifelong patterns. 23:32 — Kids Mirror Our Energy Why parents must regulate themselves before correcting behavior. 25:12 — Guilt, Overcompensating, and Boundaries Why saying “no” is part of being a good father. 26:52 — Teaching Boundaries Is Teaching Respect How limits help children navigate the real world. 28:44 — Learning to Love the Ketchup Choosing meaning over irritation in everyday parenting moments. 30:39 — Discomfort as a Superpower Why learning to embrace discomfort creates growth and resilience. 33:13 — The Birth of Wild Ops Box How lost institutions inspired a modern solution for fathers and kids. 35:18 — Leaving the Army and Losing Identity The hidden struggle many veterans face after service. 37:43 — Survival Skills as a Path to Connection Why outdoor education builds confidence and family bonds. 40:04 — Betting on Purpose, Not Ego Building something meaningful without burning everything down. 43:32 — A Father’s Proud Moment When Aaron’s son confidently joined an interview—and what it represented. 45:19 — Becoming a Girl Dad How having a daughter softened and strengthened him at the same time. 49:33 — Raising Boys vs. Raising Girls Masculinity, protection, and emotional presence. 52:51 — Vows to Your Children Why fathers should commit publicly to their kids, not just spouses. 55:46 — Wild Ops Box as a Ritual, Not a Product Using skill-building to create meaningful family conversations. 57:42 — Letting Kids Define Family Values Why ownership creates accountability. 58:49 — Connection vs. Independence Helping kids balance closeness with autonomy. 01:01:59 — Modeling Matters More Than Teaching Why kids follow what we do—not what we say. 01:04:33 — A Message to Disconnected Fathers Start with intention, presence, and small daily actions. 01:06:45 — The Critical Window: Ages 7–14 Why these years shape who children become. 01:08:56 — When Kids Handle Conflict Why parents sometimes need to step back. 01:12:30 — Guidance Without Shame How to correct behavior without damaging trust. 01:16:07 — “Eat Last” as a Life Principle Service, discipline, and modeling leadership at home. 01:19:24 — Community, Responsibility, and Legacy Why men must guide not just their families—but their communities. 01:20:05 — Closing Reflections Turning pain into purpose and raising men who lead with strength. Supporting Content Masters of Chaos by Linda Robinson – The book that inspired Aaron to pursue the path of a Green Beret.Wild Ops Box – Aaron’s company helping fathers and sons reconnect through outdoor skills and shared purpose.Black Rifle Coffee Company – Collaborator supporting Aaron’s Wild Ops Box founder story.Befrienders Program – Volunteer organization connecting people to serve the elderly and reduce loneliness.The Joe Rogan Experience Podcast – Where Aaron first heard about men’s groups and emotional awareness work.

    1h 20m
  7. Raising Great Guys in a World That Misunderstands Males with Jennifer L.W. Fink

    21 JAN

    Raising Great Guys in a World That Misunderstands Males with Jennifer L.W. Fink

    In this episode, Shaun sits down with Jennifer L.W. Fink—writer, nurse, mother of four boys, and author of Building Boys. Jennifer brings decades of lived experience and research to help us understand what boys really need: space, presence, and parents who see them as they truly are. Together, they explore why boys are often misunderstood, how parents can respond with calm instead of fear, and what it means to raise great guys in a world full of mixed messages. Topics Covered Developmental differences between boys and girls – Why boys aren’t behind or broken; they simply develop on a different timeline. Why boys are often misunderstood – From poop drawings to impulse-control moments, adults misinterpret normal development as misbehavior. Parenting through fear – How cultural narratives (MeToo era) cause parents to overreact to boy behavior. How to respond with connection – Curiosity over punishment; presence over panic.Healthy masculinity – Risk-taking, independence, protectiveness, physical play.Letting boys lead – Facilitating interests instead of rejecting them (e.g., Minecraft, gaming, tinkering). raising-men-podcast-recording-w…How parents can model calm leadership – High standards + connection = growth.Why boys disconnect – When they are shamed for their instincts, they stop trying. Pull Quotes  “Look at the boy in front of you. Not the boy you fear he might become — the boy who’s here right now.” “Boys aren’t broken. They’re developing on a different timeline, and when we don’t understand that, they start believing they’re the problem.” “When boys feel like who they are is wrong, they check out. When they feel seen, they thrive.” Books, Ideas & Content Mentioned Jennifer’s Website: jenniferlwfink.comStory of his youngest son crawling around the bases https://buildingboys.substack.com/p/building-boys-bulletin-7-3-23A recent post talking about some of the positive impacts of gaming https://buildingboys.substack.com/p/video-games-arent-bad-really Jennifer's article about gaming: https://www.enttoday.org/article/from-video-game-controllers-to-ors-the-surprising-role-of-gaming-in-modern-medical-practices/ON BOYS podcast, w 7 yrs worth of episodes & show notes https://www.on-boys-podcast.com/

    58 min
  8. How Storytelling Helps Us Raise Men with Paul Kix

    14 JAN

    How Storytelling Helps Us Raise Men with Paul Kix

    Paul Kix built a career telling powerful human stories—from ESPN to bestselling books. But becoming a father pushed him to rewrite the narrative of masculinity itself. In this conversation, Paul shares what he’s learned about raising boys to be strong and gentle, confident and vulnerable. We go deep on identity, authenticity, inner courage, and why sometimes the bravest thing a dad can do is admit he doesn’t have all the answers. Key Takeaways / Topics Covered Masculinity must include kindness, empathy, and emotional presence, not just strength.Modeling repair, not perfection — kids learn by watching how we handle mistakes.Vulnerability is true tensile strength — like bridges built to flex without breaking.Therapy, reflection, and emotional self-awareness are part of modern fatherhood.Raising biracial sons means helping them define identity from the inside out, not from labels society imposes.Saying no to broken systems (raffles, rewards, status pressure) teaches kids integrity and independence.Authentic storytelling builds connection — peers relate more to flaws than achievements.Reinvention is possible — pivot your skillset instead of clinging to dying industries.Courage = pushing past fear while staying grounded through reflection and spiritual guidance.Pull Quotes “If all you do is project strength, you become brittle. Vulnerability is what keeps you from breaking.” “We connect more to each other’s flaws than to each other’s victories.” “Remember that the kingdom of God is within you — live out the purpose planted inside.”Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:22 Official Introduction (Introducing Paul Kix, journalist and author)00:54 Storytelling and the Narrative of Fatherhood (Holistic masculinity, kindness, and modeling repair)02:44 Pivoting to Partner: A Wife's Need04:20 From Farmer to Modern Man (Embracing therapy and vulnerability)07:51 The Tensile Strength of Bridges (Flexibility vs. brittle tension)11:21 Performative vs. Quiet Confidence (The ultimate flex: Barry Sanders)14:55 Reinventing Career After Corporate Media (Starting the newsletter/digital course)20:29 Staring Down Fear and Catastrophizing (The path to true self)24:05 The Power of Authenticity and Chronicling Flaws (Finding "the gripe")28:34 Raising Biracial Sons (Identity, the "one-drop rule," and the shift in discourse)35:36 The School Fundraiser Dilemma (Principled stand vs. bullying)38:57 Similar Stand in Little League (Questioning the raffle)44:36 The Decision: Legoland and Life Lessons (Minimizing hardship)46:58 Kids Absorb What You Do (Henson quote)47:51 One Principle for Raising Men (The Kingdom of God is within you)52:43 Closing RemarksSupporting Content You Have to Be Prepared to Die Before You Can Begin to Live https://www.paul-kix.com/booksThe Saboteur https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/533685/the-saboteur-by-paul-kixPaul’s Storytelling Newsletter (highly praised in the episode!) https://paulkix.substack.com/ Storytelling Course: Storytelling You https://www.paul-kix.com/storytelling-you https://www.storytellingyoukickstarter.com/ Other references Brooklyn Bridge tensile strength metaphor (via therapist)Ralph Waldo Emerson on purpose & self-trustLuke 17: “The kingdom of God is within you”

    54 min
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About

Raising Men is a podcast about parenting, masculinity, and the lifelong journey of raising sons—and ourselves—to be men of courage, character, and purpose. Hosted by Shaun Dawson, each episode features real conversations with parents, leaders, and thinkers redefining what it means to raising men in today’s world.

Information

  • Creator
    Shaun Dawson
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    22
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Shaun Dawson