Demystifying Mental Toughness

David Charlton
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Demystifying Mental Toughness is for people who want to reach their goals faster and are curious what high performing athletes and professionals do to fulfil their potential. David Charlton shares insights, strategies and stories from leading athletes, coaches, psychologists and specialists to help you perform to your optimum level on a more consistent basis. If you're a motivated athlete, coach, sport psychologist, mental game coach or executive listen in for proven and practical advice in this podcast.

  1. 308 Confidence In Ability: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    7 HR AGO

    308 Confidence In Ability: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    Today, David Charlton explores a powerful but often misunderstood dynamic in sport: the highly confident coach working with an athlete who lacks confidence in their ability. At first glance, this combination might appear positive. A confident leader should inspire belief and clarity. However, when the balance isn't right, the relationship can unintentionally increase anxiety, self‑doubt and disengagement for the athlete. Drawing on Albert Bandura's concept of self‑efficacy and Sophia Jowett's 3+1 Cs coach–athlete relationship model (closeness, commitment, complementarity and co‑orientation), David explains why perception inside the relationship is crucial. Low‑confidence athletes often interpret blunt feedback or high standards as confirmation that they are not good enough. Without awareness, confident coaching can therefore widen the psychological gap rather than close it. David shares practical ways coaches can adapt their approach to create psychologically safe environments where confidence can grow. From shifting towards process goals and asking better questions, to recognising quiet athletes and building ownership, this episode offers practical strategies for coaches who want to support athletes more effectively. Ultimately, great coaching combines high standards with empathy, awareness and strong relationships so athletes feel safe to try, safe to fail and supported to learn. >> Key Takeaways ·         Confidence from a coach doesn't automatically create confidence in an athlete, without awareness it can increase anxiety. ·         Low self‑efficacy athletes often interpret criticism as proof they don't belong, which can lead to avoidance and disengagement. ·         Strong coach–athlete relationships built on trust, communication and psychological safety help confidence grow. If you enjoyed this episode, check out the other parts of this mini-series on the coach-athlete relationship and it's connection with Mental Toughness: Ep307 - Achievement Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep306 - Goal Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep305 – Emotional Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep304 – David Charlton - Life Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    11 min
  2. 307 Achievement Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    27 FEB

    307 Achievement Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    In part 4 of this mini-series, David Charlton explores a challenging but common sport dynamic: the high achievement-oriented athlete working with a low achievement-oriented coach. The athlete is organised, early, diligent, and constantly looking for ways to improvetechnical work, gym work, extras, metrics, and a "leave no stone unturned" mindset.  But the coach may appear distracted, rushed, inconsistent, late, or disorganised and may find structured goal-setting and CPD stressful. When those worlds don't align, athletes can feel unsupported, unwanted, and even inadequate, despite doing "everything right". They may also become vulnerable to overworking, anxiety, and neglecting recovery especially if they're known as the "postman" who always delivers! Drawing on Sophia Jowett's coach–athlete relationship framework (closeness, commitment, complementarity and co-orientation), David explains how misalignment often comes down to unclear expectations and poor communication not a lack of care. The episode finishes by linking the dynamic to Peter Clough's 4Cs: confidence, control, challenge and commitment and offers practical ways both coach and athlete can meet halfway through recognition, structure, boundaries, and honest conversations. >> Key Takeaways ·         Misalignment is the issue: clarity and communication are more effective than blame ·         High-achieving athletes need boundaries recovery and priorities protect long-term performance ·         Small structure matters: simple session aims, feedback and recognition build confidence If you enjoyed this episode, check out the other parts of this mini-series and our previous podcasts on the coach–athlete relationship: Ep306 - Goal Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep305 – Emotional Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep304 – David Charlton - Life Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep303: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You Think the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep293: Stuart Barnes - High Challenge, High Support: Mental Toughness in Cricket Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    11 min
  3. 306 Goal Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    20 FEB

    306 Goal Orientation: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    In this episode (part 3) of Demystifying Mental Toughness, David Charlton continues his solo series exploring the 4Cs of Mental Toughness through the coach–athlete relationship lens. The focus this week is Commitment, specifically Goal Orientation, and a common challenge in sport: the mismatch between a highly goal-oriented coach and an athlete who feels overwhelmed, anxious or uncomfortable when targets are discussed. While goal-driven coaches bring structure, clarity and high standards, some athletes experience goals as pressure rather than motivation. Fear of judgement, developing brains, and low confidence can lead to avoidance, distraction or even self-sabotage. Drawing on research from Professor Sophia Jowett and the 4Cs model of Mental Toughness, this episode explores how coaches can create shared ownership of goals, strengthen the relationship, and build confidence through simple, process-focused targets. Listeners will learn practical ways to support athletes by improving self-awareness, simplifying goal setting, and creating a learning environment that prioritises progress over pressure. When goals are built together rather than imposed, athletes feel more confident, more in control, and more committed to their development. >> Key Takeaways ·         Process goals increase confidence by focusing attention on controllable behaviours ·         Shared ownership of goals strengthens trust, motivation and commitment ·         Intrinsic motivation supports long-term development, enjoyment and wellbeing If you enjoyed this episode, check out the other parts of this mini-series and our previous podcasts on the coach–athlete relationship: Ep305 – Emotional Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently Ep304 – David Charlton - Life Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently  Ep303: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You Think the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep302: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You React the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep293: Stuart Barnes - High Challenge, High Support: Mental Toughness in Cricket Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    13 min
  4. 305 Emotional Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    13 FEB

    305 Emotional Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    In this episode of Demystifying Mental Toughness, David Charlton continues in part two of his solo series exploring the 4Cs of Mental Toughness through the coach–athlete relationship lens. The focus this week is Emotional Control and a common but misunderstood dynamic in sport: the emotionally reactive coach and the calm, composed athlete. While passion and intensity are often seen as leadership qualities, strong emotional reactions, sarcasm or outcome-focused language can unintentionally create a fear-based environment.  When athletes feel judged or humiliated, the brain's threat system activates, reducing attention, decision-making and learning. At the same time, athletes who regulate their emotions well are often misunderstood.  Calm behaviour can be interpreted as a lack of care or motivation, leading to unnecessary conflict. Drawing on research around the coach–athlete relationship and youth brain development, this episode explains how emotional climate shapes confidence, creativity and long-term engagement in sport. Listeners will also learn a simple framework for understanding emotional intensity and regulation, along with practical strategies for improving communication and psychological safety. >> Key Takeaways Fear and public criticism trigger threat responses that reduce learning and decision-making Calm athletes often care deeply, emotional control is a coping style, not disengagement Performance improves when coaches combine passion with emotional regulation and relational awareness If you enjoyed this episode, check out part one of my mini-series and our previous podcasts on all things mental toughness: Ep304 – David Charlton - Life Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently     Ep303: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You Think the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep302: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You React the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep293: Stuart Barnes - High Challenge, High Support: Mental Toughness in Cricket Ep249: Edward Hall - Workplace Collaboration in Team Sports Coaching Environments Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    19 min
  5. 304 Life Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    6 FEB

    304 Life Control: When Coaches and Athletes Think Differently

    In this episode of Demystifying Mental Toughness, David begins a new eight-part solo series exploring how mental toughness shapes the coach–athlete relationship in sport. Today's focus is Life Control — a part of mental toughness that influences whether people feel able to shape what happens to them, or whether life simply "happens" to them. David explores one of the most common and frustrating mismatches in sport: the high life-control coach and the low life-control athlete.  High-life control coaches are driven, organised and solution-focused. They believe effort changes outcomes. Low life -control athletes, often younger or more emotionally sensitive, experience sport as something that happens to them. Their confidence fluctuates, motivation comes and goes, and excuses become a way of protecting self-esteem. What looks like laziness or lack of commitment from the outside is often helplessness on the inside.  This episode shows how this clash creates tension and how, when handled well, it can become one of the most powerful developmental partnerships in sport. David also draws on research from Sophia Jowett on the coach–athlete relationship, highlighting how closeness, commitment, complementarity and shared understanding allow athletes to grow in confidence and responsibility. >> Key Takeaways High and low life control are not "good" or "bad" they are different ways of responding to pressure Low life-control athletes are often emotionally sensitive, creative and adaptable. Coaches who provide structure, chunking and emotional safety help these athletes thrive. If you enjoyed this episode, check out our previous podcasts on all things mental toughness: Ep302: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You React the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep293: Stuart Barnes - High Challenge, High Support: Mental Toughness in Cricket Ep249: Edward Hall - Workplace Collaboration in Team Sports Coaching Environments Ep201: Dr John Perry and Doug Strycharczyk – Even The Mentally Tough Can Find Things A Struggle Without Self Awareness Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    14 min
  6. 303 Why You Think the Way You Do Under Pressure

    30 JAN

    303 Why You Think the Way You Do Under Pressure

    In part 2, David Charlton is again joined by Doug Strycharczyk from AQR International to explore how mental toughness shapes the way we make decisions especially when information is incomplete and pressure is high. Doug explains that confidence is not just about believing in your skills, but also about having the interpersonal confidence to work with others, challenge ideas, and avoid the trap of groupthink. In teams and organisations, those with higher interpersonal confidence are more likely to think divergently, question assumptions, and protect ethical decision-making rather than simply follow the crowd. The conversation then moves into "challenge" and its two key components: risk orientation and learning orientation. Some people are naturally willing to step into uncertainty, but what really separates high performers is whether they learn from what happens next. Doug also introduces the idea of mental toughness as an enabler not an outcome.  It helps explain why we behave the way we do, so that we can optimise rather than try to change who we are. For athletes, coaches, and leaders, this episode reinforces why self-awareness, reflection, and purposeful practice sit at the heart of long-term performance. >> Key Takeaways ·         Confidence is both personal and interpersonal it affects how well we think and how well we collaborate. ·         Risk-taking without learning leads nowhere growth comes from reflecting on what didn't work. ·         Mental toughness isn't about being "better" it's about understanding yourself well enough to optimise performance. DISCLAIMER: David committed a schoolboy error!  Sincere apologies for the poor sound quality in parts! If you enjoyed this episode, check out our previous podcasts on all things mental toughness: Ep302: Doug Strycharczyk - Why You React the Way You Do Under Pressure Ep242: Doug Strycharczyk - What Is The Difference Between Mental Toughness And Resilience Ep201: Dr John Perry and Doug Strycharczyk – Even The Mentally Tough Can Find Things A Struggle Without Self Awareness Ep050: Doug Strycharczyk, Peter Clough MBE & Dr John Perry – Mental Strength Does Not Guarantee Success Ep001: Doug Strycharczyk – The Importance of Mental Toughness Connect with Doug Strycharczyk: ·         LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dougstrycharczyk/ ·         Email: headoffice@aqr.co.uk Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    28 min
  7. 302 Why You React the Way You Do Under Pressure

    23 JAN

    302 Why You React the Way You Do Under Pressure

    In Episode 302 (Part 1) David Charlton is joined once again by Doug Strycharczyk, CEO of AQR International, to explore how mental toughness shapes our decision-making under pressure. Drawing on over 30 years of research and applied practice, Doug breaks down the 4C's model of mental toughness and focuses specifically on Control and Commitment, two components that heavily influence how athletes, students, and performers respond when it really matters. A central theme of this conversation is that mental toughness is not judgemental. High or low scores on any dimension are not "good" or "bad"; instead, they represent different default responses. For example, high life control often shows up as a strong can-do attitude, while lower life control can reflect a more cautious, reflective approach, both of which can be highly effective depending on the situation. Doug also unpacks emotional control, explaining why routines (think Jonny Wilkinson or Cristiano Ronaldo have used) help performers stay focused under pressure. The discussion then moves into commitment, exploring the difference between goal orientation (sense of purpose) and achievement orientation (emotional drive to achieve), and why curiosity can actually be a hidden strength for those lower in achievement orientation. Throughout the episode, listeners are encouraged to develop self-awareness, manage their mental and emotional reserves, and recognise their own default responses, whether in sport, the workplace or in everyday life. This episode sets the foundation for a deeper understanding of performance psychology and why one size never fits all. >> Key Takeaways ·         Mental toughness is neutral, not judgemental.  Different responses to pressure can all be effective success depends on matching your response to the situation, not forcing a single "ideal" mindset. ·         Self-awareness creates better decisions under pressure.  Understanding your default response (freeze, rush, over-analyse) gives you the option to pause, reset, and choose a more helpful behaviour. ·         Manage your mental and emotional reserves.  Lower energy makes even simple tasks feel overwhelming. Breaking tasks down, resting, and refuelling are performance strategies, not weaknesses. DISCLAIMER: David committed a schoolboy error!  Sincere apologies for the poor sound quality in parts! If you enjoyed this episode, check out our previous podcasts on all things mental toughness: Ep242: Doug Strycharczyk - What Is The Difference Between Mental Toughness And Resilience Ep201: Dr John Perry and Doug Strycharczyk – Even The Mentally Tough Can Find Things A Struggle Without Self Awareness Ep050: Doug Strycharczyk, Peter Clough MBE & Dr John Perry – Mental Strength Does Not Guarantee Success Ep001: Doug Strycharczyk – The Importance of Mental Toughness Connect with Doug Strycharczyk: ·         LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dougstrycharczyk/ ·         Email: headoffice@aqr.co.uk Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         Join David @ The Sports Psychology Hub ·         LinkedIn

    23 min
  8. 301 Words of Wisdom – Collective Insights on Mental Toughness

    2 JAN

    301 Words of Wisdom – Collective Insights on Mental Toughness

    Happy New Year! This special compilation episode of Demystifying Mental Toughness brings together powerful reflections from multiple experts across sport, performance, and personal development. Rather than offering quick fixes, this episode invites listeners to slow down, reflect, and reconnect with what truly underpins sustainable performance: self-awareness, authenticity, focus, and self-trust. A recurring theme throughout the episode is the importance of the internal narrative. The conversations we have with ourselves shape confidence, behaviour, and decision-making under pressure. Listeners are encouraged to question unhelpful self-talk, recognise vulnerability as a strength, and understand that mental toughness is not about being "bulletproof", but about knowing yourself and responding wisely. The episode also explores the value of building a support network a "board of directors" made up of real or imagined mentors who guide thinking, perspective, and behaviour. Alongside this, the myth of multitasking is challenged, reinforcing the power of focus, presence, and committing fully to the one thing that matters most. Fear, mistakes, motivation, and setbacks are reframed not as barriers, but as essential ingredients for growth. Listeners are reminded that action often comes before motivation, progress is rarely linear, and joy and creativity are vital for long-term engagement in sport and life. This episode is a timely reminder that mental toughness is human, flexible, and deeply personal and that rediscovering enjoyment, trust, and purpose is just as important as striving for results. Key Takeaways You are the thinker, not the thought, self-talk can be shaped and trained Mental toughness exists on a spectrum; sensitivity is not weakness Authenticity matters more than approval or fitting in Build a "board of directors" to guide perspective and decision-making Multitasking is a myth, focus deeply on one thing at a time Fear can be used as fuel when recognised and harnessed Motivation is cyclical; action often comes before motivation Vulnerability and self-compassion support long-term performance Mistakes and setbacks are essential for learning and growth Joy, creativity, and presence reconnect performers with why they started Connect with David Charlton ·         Sign Up To The Mental Edge ·         LinkedIn   Relevant Podcast Episodes To Improve Your Mental Toughness as Relayed in Episode 301 Ep001: Doug Strycharczyk – The Importance of Mental Toughness Ep028: Peter Clough MBE – Why is Mental Toughness Important? Ep035: Dr John Perry – Thrive, Don't Just Survive 2021 Ep037: Penny Mallory – World Class Thinking, World Class Behaviour Ep041: Paul McGee – How to Develop Interpersonal Confidence Ep065: Dr Amy Izycky – Encouraging Mentally Healthy Cultures in Sport Ep066: Marilyn Okoro – Mental Health and Resilience: Lessons from an Olympic Medalist Ep068: Andrew Nicholson – How Hard Is It To Become A Tour Professional Golfer?  Ep075: Grant Phyphers – How to Rebuild Your Identity Ep098: Jon Bartlett – Do You Know Your Why?

    28 min
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About

Demystifying Mental Toughness is for people who want to reach their goals faster and are curious what high performing athletes and professionals do to fulfil their potential. David Charlton shares insights, strategies and stories from leading athletes, coaches, psychologists and specialists to help you perform to your optimum level on a more consistent basis. If you're a motivated athlete, coach, sport psychologist, mental game coach or executive listen in for proven and practical advice in this podcast.

Information

  • Creator
    David Charlton
  • Years Active
    2020 - 2026
  • Episodes
    309
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Inspiring Sporting Excellence Ltd 2022
  • Show Website
    Demystifying Mental Toughness

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