Empty Nest Full Banter

Jo n Stu
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  • Comedy
  • Updated weekly

Comedy podcast where Jo gets her facts hilariously wrong and Stu roasts her for it. 24 years together, still laughing at each other. New episodes weekly.

Episodes

  1. 30 Jan

    Why You Shouldn’t Give 1-Star for Your Own Bad Luck 🌟🚫

    This week at the kitchen table, Jo and Stu are back doing what they do best: talking absolute nonsense and somehow making it make sense. We kick things off by tackling the eternal misery that is January (apparently it’s the 45th… still), complete with Gerald making a return to represent the trudge. There’s also a serious(ish) discussion about glasses, maturity, and whether wearing specs is the only thing keeping things vaguely responsible. Then things spiral—as they do—into another round of reviewing reviews. From baffling condom reviews that raise more questions than answers, to a bedside table apparently made with paper drawers (paper drawers?!), Jo brings her “creative facts” and Stu tries, valiantly, to ground us in reality. Elsewhere, we debate what people even call a sat nav these days, get distracted by TV chat, and generally prove once again that leaving us unsupervised at the kitchen table is never a good idea. If you enjoy husband and wife banter, British podcasts, empty nest life, relatable couples chat, and conversations that go wildly off track but somehow still make sense, you’re in the right place. 🎙️ New episodes every Friday 👍 Like, subscribe, and drop a comment — especially if you’ve ever left (or read) a completely ridiculous 1* review 🪑 Pull up a chair and join us at the kitchen table TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Coming up 00:42 Intro 01:19 Unfair and Hysterical 1* Reviews 11:42 Jo's in trouble for abusing cables 13:19 We have our first troll 13:48 Sebastian update 14:11 Jo disagrees with the Satnav 17:53 Bed problems 19:46 Traitors review 23:25 What we thought of Hijack (spoiler we loved it!) 25:27 We watch some very funny video clips 📺 Subscribe for new episodes! 📲 Follow us on socials Instagram instagram.com/emptynestfullbanter Facebook facebook.com/emptynestfullbanter #EmptyNestFullBanter #EmptyNest #Podcast #comedypodcast #BritishHumur #OneStarReviews

  2. 23 Jan

    Sugar Rehab, Sharp Knives, and the ”Pillock” Pivot

    Welcome back to the kitchen table! This week, Jo and Stu are navigating the highs and lows of the empty nest—mostly involving high sugar intakes and low-hanging cheese plants. In this episode: Plant ER: Meet Sebastian, our magnificent 6-foot cheese plant who has sadly caught "the thrips" (or "thrips," depending on who you ask). We’re doing some serious "thrip rubbing" to save him, but if you have any tips to keep Sebastian from going limp and yellow, please drop them in the comments!. The Sweary Soften: Jo has officially announced she’s retiring her favourite insult for something more "gentle" she used in her youth. Out with the old, in with "Pillock"— though the transition hasn't been entirely F-bomb free. Sugar Rehab: Jo comes clean about her rampant sugar addiction. From "therapy chocolate" during trips to Manchester to the "edgy" reality of a chocolate detox while wielding a kitchen knife, things are getting a bit sharp in the kitchen. Yoga Tears: Why does a session of "downward dogging" with Yoga with Kassandra leave Jo in floods of tears? Birthday Banter: It’s Stu’s birthday this Sunday! While the nest won't be empty for long as the kids return for a family dinner, the real mystery is the "inappropriate" gift list Stu suggested. Empty Nest. Full Banter. Zero Filter. New episodes every Friday! Pull up a chair, hit subscribe, and join the chaos. 🪑✨ Are you over 50 and find yourself making "the noise" every time you bend down to pick something up? Let us know your theories on why it’s essential for gripping things!. 📺 Subscribe for new episodes! 📲 Follow us on socials Instagram instagram.com/emptynestfullbanter Facebook facebook.com/emptynestfullbanter #EmptyNestFullBanter #EmptyNest #Podcast #yogaforlife #RelatableParenting

  3. 16 Jan

    Is Mr. Tickle a Criminal? 👮‍♂️🚫

    Listen, we’ve all had a rough January, but Stu and Jo are currently navigating a post-Christmas hangover that involves burnt house plants, "moist" traitors, and a deep-dive into the criminal record of the Mr. Men. Jo’s still trying to figure out if a "meme" is a virus or an idea, while Stu is busy dodging nasal drips during "number ones". It’s 17 minutes of two people who have been married for 24 years finally realising they might be the "wrong uns." Empty Nest. Full Banter. Zero Filter. Hit subscribe now to join the chaos. TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Intro 01:42 The "Double Busy" Incident: Stu’s nasal drip meets gravity. 02:37 Bedding Inferno: Why they’ve been sleeping in separate rooms and burning the evidence. 04:16 January Vibes: A horticultural tragedy involving a metaphorical flamethrower. 05:38 NHS Reality Check: Mum Expected a brass band 06:59 The "Moist" Traitor: Why Steven’s sweatiness is a total giveaway. 07:34 Mr. Tickle’s Cancellation: Rebranding a "wrong un" for 2026. 08:50 Mr. Bump’s Scam: Investigating the impossible accidents of a fictional circle. 09:28 Mr. Daydream & Revisited: What about the school fines. 11:20 Unhinged 1 star review 11:47 Translation Fails 14:45 The AI Dog Dance: Jo's delighted by dancing dogs. 📺 Subscribe for new episodes! 📲 Follow us on socials Instagram instagram.com/emptynestfullbanter Facebook facebook.com/emptynestfullbanter #emptynestfullbanter #podcastshow #comedy

  4. 26/12/2025

    🎄 1-STAR REVIEWS: The Buckingham Palace Toilet Crisis & Rod Stewart’s Hair Rage! | Christmas Comedy

    Jo challenges Anthony Joshua to a £210 MILLION boxing match (with a ring "a couple of miles wide"), we discover the most OUTRAGEOUS 1-star reviews on the internet, and debate whether AI will force plumbers to become mobile waxers named Dave! 🥊 🎯 IN THIS EPISODE: 🥊 Jo vs. Anthony Joshua: The Fight of the Century £210 million boxing match challenge (officially undefeated record!) Training footage that will terrify... absolutely no one Ring specifications: "a couple of miles wide" Eddie Hearn, your phone should be ringing! ⭐ RIDICULOUS 1-STAR REVIEWS: 🚽 Buckingham Palace Toilet Scandal "Only go with a strong bladder" - the royal bathroom crisis Orange juice + cups of tea = disaster waiting to happen Should they rip out the throne room for urinals? The rose bush conspiracy theory revealed 🎸 Rod Stewart's "Cheesy Bull*cks" Christmas Album Husband's jealous rant about Rod's hair (he's in his 80s!) "She thinks he's the bees knees - about time he had a decent haircut" Couples therapy urgently needed The bullock/bollocks spelling debate 😎 Sunglasses Review Mystery "There was a big time on my face" - WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?! Could be 5-stars in other circumstances... Translation failures that create pure comedy gold 🃏 The Left-Handed Playing Cards Miracle "Finally cards for left handers!" (Wait, what?) How is this even possible? We need left-handers to explain this in the comments! 🕯️ The Candle review "Love this candle - didn't arrive" ⭐ Other reviews: "I have to repaint my walls!" Should've been 5-stars for NOT arriving 🏛️ THE BUDE TUNNEL: Britain's 8th Wonder of the World 1,582 reviews! 4.7 stars! No. 4 attraction in Bude! "A glorious curved corridor of wonders" "Don't be fooled - it's a PORTAL, a cultural experience!" "Forget the Eiffel Tower or Grand Canyon" - THIS is the real deal It's literally a plastic-covered walkway to Sainsbury's The haters: "15 seconds of walking time" (THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND MAJESTY) Britain's answer to the Sydney Opera House Bucket list pilgrimage destination 🤖 When AI Takes Our Jobs Dave the plumber becomes Dave the mobile waxer "What seems to be the trouble with your pipes, madam?" Industrial duct tape and big pliers for beauty treatments The jobs AI definitely CAN'T take 📅 Naming the Days Between Christmas & New Year Twixmas? Noel-tide Eve? Xmas Fest? Stu's revolutionary proposal: Twixmas Eve, Twixmas day, Boxing Twix The days that don't have names FINALLY get justice 🎬 Christmas Content Special Jo's bold red Christmas lip ("very kissable") The mistletoe camera incident Why we're all social media stars now Management team requirements (Off Menu podcast, watch out!) ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Christmas Intro & Twixmas Debate 2:41 - Boxing Day: Jo vs Anthony Joshua Challenge 5:03 - The Management Team Situation 6:01 - AI Takes Our Jobs: Dave the Waxer 7:32 - REVIEWS BEGIN: Buckingham Palace Toilet Crisis 9:01 - Rod Stewart's Hair Controversy 11:28 - "Big Time On My Face" Mystery 12:08 - Left-Handed Cards Phenomenon 13:21 - The Candle That Didn't Arrive 14:01 - THE BUDE TUNNEL LEGEND BEGINS 19:38 - Shuffling Papers Like the News 💬 BEST QUOTES: "There was a big time on my face" "Cheesy bollocks!" "A Monument to human ingenuity and perspex" "The 8th wonder of the world" "Some people got no class - they'd show them the Mona Lisa and say 'it's just a bad painting of a grumpy woman!'" 👫 ABOUT US: We're Stu & Jo - married 24 years and still finding reasons to laugh at the internet's most ridiculous reviews! Join us for weekly comedy, chaos, and questionable Christmas content. 📱 CONNECT: 💬 Left-handers: PLEASE explain those playing cards! 🥊 Anthony Joshua: Check your DMs 🏛️ Have you visited the Bude Tunnel? Share your life-changing experience! ⭐ Send us your favorite terrible reviews! #Podcast #BudeTunnel #Christmas #FunnyReviews #1StarReviews #BritishComedy #Twixmas #AnthonyJoshua #MarriedLife #CouplePodcast #ChristmasSpecial ⚠️ WARNING: Contains discussions of royal toilets, follicular jealousy, mysterious face-times, and plastic tunnel worship. May cause uncontrollable laughter and urgent desire to visit Sainsbury's Bude. 👍 LIKE if you've ever left a confusing review 💬 COMMENT your worst 1-star review experience 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for more review madness Thanks for watching! Now go visit the Bude Tunnel - it's only 15 seconds of your life! 🛒

    🎄 1-STAR REVIEWS: The Buckingham Palace Toilet Crisis & Rod Stewart’s Hair Rage! | Christmas Comedy

  5. 19/12/2025

    1-Star Review Madness + Nightmare on Elm Street vs Miracle on 34th Street Mix-Up! 🎄😱

    Jo confuses NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET with a wholesome Christmas film (perfect for babysitting, right?), and we dive into the most RIDICULOUS 1-star reviews on the internet. Plus: the dumbest inventions ever made, including a solar-powered bikini and ice cream that rotates itself! 🎯 IN THIS EPISODE: 🎬 Christmas Film DISASTERS Jo suggests "Nightmare on Elm Street" for festive family viewing "There's a lovely little girl in it... probably not for long" The Miracle on 34th Street vs. Freddy Krueger confusion Never let Jo choose the Christmas movies ⭐ HILARIOUS 1-Star Reviews: When Stupidity Meets Amazon 👁️ Eye drops review: "The instructions are only for RIGHT-HANDED people!" 🏋️ Dumbbells: "No instructions included" (2 people found this helpful!) 🧻 Toilet roll for Australian guests (they need QUALITY) 📝 Pritt Stick: "I'm left-handed and turned it the wrong way" 🪒 The "balding brush" keeper (in case they buy it again!) 💯 "1-star: Good quality, excellent product" - HUH?! 🎖️ Military Precision vs. Surgical Strikes Jo's Facts: "Surgical strikes only happen in operating theatres!" The most ridiculous debate we've ever had Welcome to "Jo's Facts" - where knowledge goes to die 🤦 The WORST Inventions Ever Made ☀️ Solar-Powered Bikini (charge your phone while tanning!) 👟 Metal Detecting Sandals (looks like house arrest) 🔫 Gun-Shaped Camera (with realistic gunshot sounds!) 🍦 Ice Cream Cone Rotator (because hands are SO last century) 🎅 Christmas Updates: 🥧 Mince Pie Counter: 12 → 6 (where did they go, Jo?) 🌊 Wreath vs. Storm Bram: THE REMATCH 🎄 Jo gets attacked by a neighbor's wreath (caught on Ring doorbell!) 🎁 Christmas card distribution goes hilariously wrong ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Nightmare on Elm Street Christmas Special 0:50 - Ridiculous Product Reviews Begin 4:03 - Surgical Strike Debate (Jo's Facts) 6:50 - The Dumbbells With No Instructions 8:48 - More Christmas Film Confusion 10:03 - WORST Inventions: Solar Bikini Edition 13:54 - Ice Cream Rotator & Science Gone Mad 15:00 - Mince Pie Investigation 16:00 - Wreath Attacks Jo (CCTV footage exists!) 17:00 - Like, Subscribe, Comment! 💬 BEST QUOTES: "There's a lovely little girl... probably not for long!" "Surgical strikes only happen in operating theatres" "I wasted a load one day before realizing the top was still on" "It went straight on my face like your phone does in the night!" 👫 ABOUT US: We're Stu & Jo - married 24 years and still trying to get through Christmas without incident. He's sensible. She confuses horror films with festive classics. We read stupid product reviews, and somehow Jo gets attacked by a Christmas wreath. Join us for weekly chaos! 📱 CONNECT WITH US: Ever left a ridiculous 1-star review? Witnessed a wreath attack? Confused by the difference between Nightmare on Elm Street and Miracle on 34th Street? COMMENT BELOW! Have you eaten all the mince pies? Us too. 🥧 #Podcast #Christmas #FunnyReviews #ProductReviews #Amazon #ChristmasMovies #NightmareOnElmStreet #BritishComedy #MarriedLife #CouplePodcast #ChristmasFails #1StarReviews #DumbInventions #ProductFails #HolidayChaos #FestiveFails #ChristmasHumor #AmazonReviews #WeirdProducts #PodcastComedy #UKPodcast #FunnyPodcast #ChristmasContent ⚠️ WARNING: Contains: Freddy Krueger babysitting scenarios, people who can't operate Pritt Sticks, Australian toilet paper standards, and a wreath with murderous intent. 👍 LIKE if you've ever left a ridiculous review 💬 COMMENT your worst product fail 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly pre-Christmas meltdowns Thanks for watching! Now go read some 1-star reviews for entertainment! ⭐ P.S. Our wreath is still alive (barely). The mince pies are not. 🎄🥧

    1-Star Review Madness + Nightmare on Elm Street vs Miracle on 34th Street Mix-Up! 🎄😱

  6. 12/12/2025

    Mince Pies in the House: Can Jo Resist? (Plus: Wrong Car Chaos)

    👫 Stu & Jo | Married 24 years, empty nesters | Jo gets things confidently wrong, Stu lovingly corrects her Jo's mince pie addiction reaches CRITICAL levels (12 pies under one roof!), and we accidentally become your new educators - learning about panettone, leavened bread, and medieval insults. Plus: Why did Stu get into someone else's car? 🚗 🎯 IN THIS EPISODE: 📚 The Discovery Channel of Podcasts (not really)   Learn about panettone (it's LEAVENED, people!) Etymology deep dive: Why is Tom the fool? The origin of "lovelorn" revealed Crampons vs Clamp-ons: Jo's mountain climbing confusion You can call yourself a DOCTOR after watching 3 episodes! 🎓   🎄 Christmas Chaos Begins   Storm Bram vs the front door wreath Chief Elf hands over the tinsel reins (empty nest alert!) Jo's mince pie obsession reaches defcon 1 Current supply: 12 mince pies (place your bets for next episode) The great panettone investigation   🚨 DANGER OF LIFE WARNING   Not a danger TO life... a danger OF life Why September & October are popular birthday months Storm Bram's unintended consequences Stu comes home "sodden" (word of the episode!)   🌱 Jo's Gardening Update   Planting bulbs in a storm (smart gardening!) How many of our audience are gardeners? (Hordes, obviously) Storm Bram does the watering for free   🚗 THE WRONG CAR INCIDENT   Stu's car is suspiciously clean 🤔 Classic tomfoolery at the supermarket Video reaction: Man's dad gets in wrong car Link: https://www.instagram.com/reels/DRkP_92Ea2Q/ The rolling Audi mystery: Did our car move itself?!   🎭 Life Together: Perky vs Peaky   Jo's energy levels: From flat to BUZZING The "thinking has a satellite delay" phenomenon Stu's loving observations about Jo's... unique brain Why Jo seems like a fool (but isn't... completely!)   🍕 Forgotten Pizza & Abandoned Children   That time Stu forgot to pick up the child from school Why being early is NOT our thing The red coat ninja entrance at comedy shows   ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Intro & PhD Level Education 2:00 - Storm Bram & Wreath Drama 3:00 - Christmas Tree Chief Elf Crisis 5:45 - MINCE PIE ADDICTION ALERT 8:00 - The Panettone Investigation 10:00 - Clamp-ons, Tomfoolery & Lovelorn 14:00 - The Pizza & Forgotten Child Story 15:58 - Wrong Car Video Reaction 17:00 - Stu's Wrong Car Confession 18:15 - The Rolling Audi Mystery 💬 BEST QUOTES: "Once you've watched three of our episodes, you can call yourself a doctor!" "This car is terribly clean..." "I instantly knew which child I'd abandoned" "Like an addict with some supply in the building" "Maybe this is where all the Christmas babies come from"   👫 ABOUT US: We're Stu & Jo - married 24 years (somehow!). He's logical. She speaks at 100mph while her brain catches up later. We're very different people making it work, one sodden episode at a time!   📱 CONNECT WITH US: Got mince pie addiction support? Car park confusion stories? Leave a comment! Gardening demographic: Make yourselves known! 🌱   #EmptyNestFullBanter #BritishComedy #UKPodcast #MarriedLife #EmptyNesters #ChristmasPodcast #MincePies #Panettone #StormBram #Etymology #WordOrigins #ComedyPodcast #WrongCar #MarriageHumor   ⚠️ WARNING: Contains dangerous levels of mince pie obsession, educational content about leavened bread, and evidence that both hosts probably shouldn't be allowed near car parks. 👍 LIKE if you've ever gotten into the wrong car 💬 COMMENT your best car park disaster story 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly tomfoolery Thanks for watching! Stay perky, not peaky! 🎄✨

    Mince Pies in the House: Can Jo Resist? (Plus: Wrong Car Chaos)

  7. 05/12/2025

    Jo's Ballet Delusions + Japan's Human Washing Machine (She Expected Rotation in Both)

    Jo's on the NAUGHTY STEP this week! Mystery men's pants appear in Stu's drawer (awkward...), Jo gets caught speeding, AND we discover Japan has invented a HUMAN WASHING MACHINE. What could possibly go wrong? 🎯 IN THIS EPISODE: 🩲 PANTGATE: The Mystery Deepens Unknown gentleman's pants discovered in Stu's drawer "Where are these man's pants come from?!" Post-truth era defense strategies deployed Does Stu now have a FREE PASS? 👀 🚗 Jo's Speed Awareness Course Caught doing 68 in a 60 (it was a fair cop!) Jo thought she might START THE COURSE FOR EVERYONE Imagined the instructor in his pyjamas panicking 🎄 December Panic Mode ACTIVATED The poinsettia is doing "a lot of heavy lifting" Christmas tree purchased: "I've only got a little one but I'm getting it up at the weekend" Are Stu & Jo's decorations up? Absolutely not. 👯‍♀️ BONUS: Jo's Ballet Disaster (Redux) Why Jo thought she was NAILING ballet class The mirror incident that changed everything Turns out: she was watching the instructor, not herself Same thing happened at Zumba... and possibly more recently "That old lady in the mirror... oh no, that's ME" 💬 Apology Tour: Sandra Edition Catherine's angry voice note: "Where the f**k was I?!" "Sandra, who the f**k is Sandra?!" If Jo still follows you on social media, you're safe Love letter to all former colleagues (yes, ALL of you) 🧼 THE HUMAN WASHING MACHINE Japan invents $385,000 washing machine... FOR HUMANS "Cleans the soul" - that's a DEEP cleanse Jo imagined ROTATION (obviously) Test pilot waves goodbye to his family before entering Would YOU get in? Comment below! 🐕 REJECTED: Competitive Dog Grooming Career "17 poodles in 30 minutes" - is that even possible? Jo doesn't know the difference between dog grooming and sheep shearing ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Intro & Mirror Confusion (Again) 0:47 - Poinsettia Festive Fail 2:07 - December Panic & Decorations 2:58 - PANTGATE: Mystery Underwear Discovered 4:08 - Free Pass Negotiations 5:03 - Jo's Speed Awareness Course 6:21 - Jo Thinks She Starts Courses For Everyone 6:25 - Apology to Former Colleagues (Except Sandra) 7:19 - Katherine's SAVAGE Voice Note 8:10 - Bonus Content: Ballet & Dog Grooming Chaos 11:32 - Ballet Story: The Mirror Incident Returns 13:11 - The HUMAN WASHING MACHINE Revealed 16:00 - Jo Imagines Rotation (Obviously) 💬 BEST QUOTES: "I'm gonna say another stupid thing now... but I imagine rotation" "Sandra, who the f**k is Sandra?!" "That old lady in the mirror... oh no, that's me" "Someone started the course! I haven't got my slides ready!" "It wasn't me" - Jo's post-truth defense strategy "I nailed it on my first go" (she was watching the instructor) 👫 ABOUT US: We're Stu & Jo - married 24 years and somehow still talking to each other. Stu's a computer programmer with spatial reasoning. Jo has excellent spatial awareness (the poinsettia incident says otherwise). We're bringing you chaos, confusion, and conversations about washing machines you didn't know you needed. 📱 CONNECT WITH US: Got mystery pants? Been on a speed awareness course? Think rotation is involved in human washing machines? COMMENT BELOW! Special shout outs: Catherine (sorry!), and all of Jo's former colleagues who are still on social media 💙 #Podcast #Comedy #MarriedLife #RelationshipHumor #Couples #BritishComedy #SpeedAwareness #Japan #WeirdInventions #ChristmasDecorations #MysteryPants #BalletFails #MirrorConfusion #HumanWashingMachine #CouplePodcast #PodcastEpisode #ADHD #MotorwaySafety #DomesticChaos #PostTruth #SandraDrama #CompetitiveDogGrooming #ZumbaFails #SpatialAwareness ⚠️ WARNING: Contains discussions of mystery underwear, imaginary rotation, multiple mirror-related incidents, and questionable spatial awareness. Jo may or may not understand how mirrors work. 👍 LIKE if you've ever thought you were nailing something but were actually watching someone else do it 💬 COMMENT your weirdest "naughty step" moment 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly domestic disasters Thanks for watching! Now go check your pant drawer! 🩳 🎥 Links mentioned in this episode: Human Washing Machine Video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AfNrAIITDi0 https://interestingengineering.com/innovation/human-washing-machine-goes-on-sale P.S. If you lost a pair of men's pants, please get in touch. We have questions.

    Jo's Ballet Delusions + Japan's Human Washing Machine (She Expected Rotation in Both)

  8. 03/12/2025

    20 Birds Challenge: Jo Nearly Names a Scarecrow (Stu Can't Cope)

    Can you name 20 birds without Googling? Jo thinks she can... but wait until you hear "scarecrow" make an appearance! Plus, we fall down the Love Actually rabbit hole after watching the Waitrose Christmas advert. Spoiler: Emma Thompson is EVERYONE'S sister?! 🐦 IN THIS EPISODE: 🦜 THE GREAT BIRD NAMING CHALLENGE Jo attempts to name 20 birds off the top of her head "I nearly said scarecrow!" - The moment that broke us Blue tit, green tit... "you can have two tits!" Miliband or Mallard confusion: Is it a duck? Standard Goose? The struggle is REAL Final score: Did she hit 20? (You'll be surprised!) 🎄 LOVE ACTUALLY: 22 YEARS LATER Inspired by Joe Wilkinson & Keira Knightley's Waitrose ad Why this 2003 classic still hits Stu's rating: "3 cries and 1 sob" The Colin Firth Portuguese romance moment 💔 That video scene with Keira Knightley that DESTROYED us Emma Thompson revelation: Wait, she's WHOSE sister?! Hugh Grant dancing down the stairs (still iconic) 🐦 ROBIN DRAMA: Christmas RUINED? Are robins actually MEAN birds? Jo's wild theory: Do they steal eggs like cuckoos? The great robin vs. cuckoo debate Can we still enjoy Christmas cards after this? Territorial robin facts that shocked us both 🎬 ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: Where Would We Be? Stu's dream: Independent film director (Hollywood would crush his creativity) Jo's confession: West End star... but NO SINGING "Some sort of mute musical" - The career that never was Would we have worked together? (Spoiler: Rom-coms only!) 😤 MARRIAGE SURVIVAL TIPS How does Stu handle anger? "I tell her!" 😂 The Great Potato Gratin Freezer Incident Pet peeves explained (Jo thought it was about ACTUAL PETS) Secret to happy marriage: "Tell him he's an idiot" ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Intro & Questionable Foreplay 1:24 - Welcome to the Show! 1:48 - THE BIRD NAMING CHALLENGE BEGINS 6:36 - Robin Behaviour Investigation 9:10 - Love Actually Deep Dive 13:05 - Dream Careers: Hollywood vs West End 15:11 - Joy, Pet Peeves & Handling Anger 17:05 - The Potato Gratin Disaster 💬 BEST QUOTES: "I nearly said scarecrow!" "You can have two tits (birds!)" "Three cries and one sob!" "I thought pet peeve was about PETS!" "I tell her... to wind her neck in!" 🎯 WHY WATCH THIS: ✅ Bird naming fails that'll make you cry-laugh ✅ Love Actually nostalgia ✅ Marriage tips (sort of) ✅ British comedy chaos ✅ Empty nest banter at its finest ✅ Random bird facts you never asked for 👫 ABOUT EMPTY NEST FULL BANTER: We're Jo & Stu - married 24+ years, empty nesters, and complete opposites who somehow make it work. She thinks scarecrows are birds. He can actually name birds correctly. Together, we bring you weekly doses of relationship chaos, questionable knowledge, and genuine laughs. 📱 JOIN THE CONVERSATION: 💭 Can YOU name 20 birds? Comment your list! 🎬 What's your favourite Love Actually moment? 🐦 Are robins actually mean? Settle this debate! ❓ Questions for future episodes? Drop them below! #EmptyNestFullBanter #Podcast #BirdQuiz #LoveActually #ChristmasMovies #KeiraKnightley #MarriedLife #BritishComedy #CouplePodcast #FunnyPodcast #ChristmasContent #MovieReview #RomCom #RelationshipGoals #Marriage #EmptyNesters #ComedyPodcast #UKPodcast #ChristmasAd #Waitrose #EmmaThompson #ColinFirth #HughGrant #RomanticComedy #Robins #ChristmasBirds #QuizShow #CoupleGoals #PodcastCommunity ⚠️ WARNING: Contains excessive laughter, bird confusion, emotional damage from Love Actually, and frozen potato gratins. 👍 LIKE if you've ever confused a scarecrow for a bird 💬 COMMENT your Love Actually cry count 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly empty nest chaos 📤 SHARE with anyone who needs a laugh today! New episodes every week! Thanks for being part of our Empty Nest Full Banter family! 💕

    20 Birds Challenge: Jo Nearly Names a Scarecrow (Stu Can't Cope)

  9. 30/11/2025

    Jo’s Bird Wrangling Disaster Interview + Waitrose Christmas Ad

    Jo reveals her latest career ambition: BIRD WRANGLING. Yes, you read that right. Despite being terrified of chickens and having a traumatic pigeon incident in Birmingham, she's ready to wrestle eagles... or is she?   🎯 IN THIS EPISODE:   🐔 The Bird Wrangling Interview - Jo applies for the world's strangest job - Can she name more than 12 birds? (Spoiler: We're not convinced) - The infamous tit-wrangling reference disaster - Why ostriches and fancy hats don't mix   💼 Jo's Job History: A Masterclass in Quitting - Applied, accepted, and quit a job in 3 DAYS (possibly a world record?) - Tales from the revolving door of employment - Sometimes the job hates YOU back - Shout out to Sandra (the only good thing about work)   💕 Relationship Chaos: ADHD vs. The Donkey Brain - Living with someone who discusses 3 topics in ONE sentence - Stu's brain: a peaceful donkey cart 🫏 - Jo's brain: a motorway at rush hour 🏎️ - The whale/salmon conversation phenomenon explained   🎄 BONUS: Waitrose Christmas Advert Review - Why we're obsessed with the new Keira Knightley ad - Stu gets a "free pass" (and so does Jo!) - Mark Bonner: The unexpected crush revelation - TikTok algorithm exposes Jo's... interesting viewing habits 👀   ⏱️ TIMESTAMPS: 0:00 - Intro & Mannequin Talk 2:32 - What Are We Talking About Today? 4:12 - Waitrose Advert & Keira Knightley 7:19 - Free Pass Confusion 9:47 - Bird Wrangling Origins 12:27 - The Bird Wrangling Interview Begins 15:18 - Life Together: ADHD Meets Donkey Brain 17:23 - Final Thoughts & Subscribe!   ## 💬 BEST QUOTES: "Sometimes the job hates me!" "I nearly drowned, call the emergency services" "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" "Ask me where I'll be in 2 months!" "You lost control of the tits on several occasions"   ---   👫 ABOUT US: We're Stu & Jo - a married couple who've been together 24 years (somehow). He's a computer programmer who can help with your AI fears. She's... well, she's looking for her next career, possibly in avian wrestling. We're very different people who somehow make it work, and we're bringing you our chaotic conversations weekly!   ---   📱 CONNECT WITH US: Questions? Relationship advice? Bird wrangling tips? Send us a message on Instagram Instagram @emptynestfullbanter   Special shout out to Sandra - you're a legend! 💙   ---   #Podcast #Comedy #BirdWrangling #Relationships #ADHD #MarriedLife #CareerChange #JobHunting #CouplePodcast #BritishComedy #WeirdJobs #KeiraKnightley #ChristmasAdverts #TikTokAlgorithm #PodcastEpisode #RelationshipHumor #JobInterview #AnimalJobs #QuirkyCouples   ---   ⚠️ WARNING: Contains discussions of bird poo, questionable career choices, and an unhealthy obsession with a supermarket Christmas advert.   👍 LIKE if you've ever quit a job before starting it 💬 COMMENT your weirdest job experience 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chaos   Thanks for watching! Now go wrestle a pigeon! 🐦💪

    Jo’s Bird Wrangling Disaster Interview + Waitrose Christmas Ad

  10. 27/11/2025

    Quadruple Earmuffs for 4-Eared People + Can You Drive With Headphones On?

    Married 18 years, together 24, and finally recording the ridiculous conversations we've been having all along. Welcome to our first episode! In This Episode: How we met online 24 years ago (back when the internet was innocent) Are headphones legal while driving? We investigate Why do men have beards and women don't? Colder chins? Our AI expert weighs in Jo's struggles wearing headphones and hats (yes, really) The invention of quadruple earmuffs for the underserved four-eared community Why Stu currently has a goatee (spoiler: shaving accident) Timestamps: 0:00 - Intro & Who We Are 6:09 - Where We Live (We're Quite Lost) 7:01 - Stu's 3-Degree Morning Walk in Just a T-Shirt 10:58 - The Quadra Ear Muff Innovation 11:22 - Driving with Headphones: Legal or Not? 16:28 - Why Men Have Beards (Peacocking Theory) 21:35 - Stu's Goatee Origin Story This is what happens when an empty nest couple decides to share their kitchen table banter with the world. No script. No filter. Just 24 years of practice. 🔔 Subscribe for more unfiltered chaos 👍 Like if this made you laugh (or confused you in an entertaining way) 💬 Comment - Should Stu grow a Salvador Dalí moustache? New here? Start with this episode to meet us, then join the chaos weekly! #EmptyNestFullBanter #PodcastFirstEpisode #BritishHumor #MarriedLife #podcast #emptynest

    Quadruple Earmuffs for 4-Eared People + Can You Drive With Headphones On?
  • 10 Episodes

About

Comedy podcast where Jo gets her facts hilariously wrong and Stu roasts her for it. 24 years together, still laughing at each other. New episodes weekly.

Information

  • Creator
    Jo n Stu
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    10
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 All Rights Reserved
  • Show Website
    Empty Nest Full Banter