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You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for the Adult Children of Parents with Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders

Torie Wiksell
  • 5.0 (3)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated weekly

Torie Wiksell, is no stranger to talking about toxic parents and dysfunctional family dynamics. As a therapist Torie focuses on supporting the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. She also grew up with a mother who had an unmanaged personality disorder and understands the uniquely complicated aspects of these relationships. Torie brings a refreshingly relatable perspective to navigating a complicated relationship with a parent who has BPD or narcissistic traits while instilling hope that things can get better and ensuring her listeners they are not alone. Follow Torie on TikTok: tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on Instagram: instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist Learn more about navigating complicated parent relationships and find resources that can help at www.confidentboundaries.com Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy, nor is it a substitute for therapy. If you are in a mental health crisis, please contact the Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988. You're Not Crazy is a podcast owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

  1. 3 days ago

    You Can Handle Anything, and That's the Problem: Capacity vs. Capability When You Were Raised by a Toxic Parent

    Too many cycle breakers know that moment when your phone lights up with the latest family emergency and you drop everything to try to calm the storm. When you grow up with a narcissistic parent or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, you learn early on that keeping the peace is what keeps you safe. So, when there's a crisis, of course you spring into action. In this episode we dive into: The difference between what you're capable of and what you actually have the capacity forThe cost of being designated the family fixerThe "I should be able to handle this" story, and how it keeps you stuck in burnout and self-blameOne honest question to ask yourself this week that brings real clarity to how you spend your time, energy, and resourcesReady to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/vault Want the more episodes of You're Not Crazy? Join The Private Feed for access to bonus and ad-free episodes plus the full archive: confidentboundaries.com/private Follow Torie on Instagram: @cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: @cyclebreakertherapist Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck Learn what actually gets in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: confidentboundaries.com/opt-in Support the show A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors! Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline. You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

    12 min
  2. You Can Handle Anything, and That's the Problem: Capacity vs. Capability When You Were Raised by a Toxic Parent

    4 days ago • The Private Feed Only

    You Can Handle Anything, and That's the Problem: Capacity vs. Capability When You Were Raised by a Toxic Parent

    Too many cycle breakers know that moment when your phone lights up with the latest family emergency and you drop everything to try to calm the storm. When you grow up with a narcissistic parent or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, you learn early on that keeping the peace is what keeps you safe. So, when there's a crisis, of course you spring into action. In this episode we dive into: -The difference between what you're capable of and what you actually have the capacity for -The cost of being designated the family fixer -The "I should be able to handle this" story, and how it keeps you stuck in burnout and self-blame -One honest question to ask yourself this week that brings real clarity to how you spend your time, energy, and resources Ready to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/vault Want the more episodes of You're Not Crazy? Join The Private Feed for access to bonus and ad-free episodes plus the full archive: confidentboundaries.com/private Follow Torie on Instagram: @cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: @cyclebreakertherapist Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck Learn what actually gets in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: confidentboundaries.com/opt-in

    12 min

  3. 16 Jun

    How to Survive Father's Day When You Were Raised by a Toxic Parent

    When grow up with a toxic parent, Father's Day isn't an exciting celebration. It's a loaded weekend that sits heavy on your nervous system. And it's why the week leading up to it can leave you feeling completely drained before you even get to the main event. In this episode you'll learn: Why the week before and after Father's Day can feel just as heavy as the day itselfHow to make an intentional choice about your scrolling instead of letting it quietly wreck your weekA self-compassion practice that's as simple as checking in with how you're actually doingA tip for sorting through your real options when there's no perfect choice about calling, visiting, or giftingThe difference between a decision that protects your well-being and one that's only about keeping other people from being upset with youIf you've spent your whole life deciding it's easier to sacrifice yourself than to risk disappointing your family, this episode is for you. Ready to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/vault Follow Torie on Instagram: @cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: @cyclebreakertherapist Get access to bonus content and the entire archive of episodes when you subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed: confidentboundaries.com/private  Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck If your boundaries keep blowing up or leaving you drowning in guilt, it's usually not you. Learn what problems actually get in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: confidentboundaries.com/opt-in Support the show A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors! Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline. You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

    15 min
  4. How to Survive Father's Day When You Were Raised by a Toxic Parent

    15 Jun • The Private Feed Only

    How to Survive Father's Day When You Were Raised by a Toxic Parent

    When grow up with a toxic parent, Father's Day isn't an exciting celebration. It's a loaded weekend that sits heavy on your nervous system. And it's why the week leading up to it can leave you feeling completely drained before you even get to the main event. In this episode you'll learn: -Why the week before and after Father's Day can feel just as heavy as the day itself -How to make an intentional choice about your scrolling instead of letting it quietly wreck your week -A self-compassion practice that's as simple as checking in with how you're actually doing -A tip for sorting through your real options when there's no perfect choice about calling, visiting, or gifting -The difference between a decision that protects your well-being and one that's only about keeping other people from being upset with you If you've spent your whole life deciding it's easier to sacrifice yourself than to risk disappointing your family, this episode is for you. Ready to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/vault Follow Torie on Instagram: @cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: @cyclebreakertherapist Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck If your boundaries keep blowing up or leaving you drowning in guilt, it's usually not you. Learn what problems actually get in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: confidentboundaries.com/opt-in

    15 min
  5. Death by a Thousand Paper Cuts: The Small Stuff That Wasn't Small at All

    13 Jun • The Private Feed Only

    Death by a Thousand Paper Cuts: The Small Stuff That Wasn't Small at All

    When you grow up with a toxic parent who has borderline or narcissistic traits, it's not just the loud moments that do the deepest damage. It's also the thousand smaller cuts, the offhand comments that were minimized or dismissed by others, that slowly chip away at how you see yourself. In this episode of You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed, Torie shares one of those tiny cuts that deeply impacted her own sense of self growing up.

    10 min

  6. 9 Jun

    Stop Explaining Your Boundary to Your Toxic Parent

    When you set a boundary with a narcissistic parent, or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, they tend to push back by acting like they don't get it. They argue, they question whether your boundary is even reasonable, they pull you into a debate about whether you should have it at all.  It's why these conversations so often end with you backing down, second-guessing yourself, and wondering if you were the unreasonable one all along. In this episode you'll learn: Why a parent like this pretends not to understand your boundary, and what they're actually doing when they pull you into the back and forthThe difference between setting a boundary and asking for permission, and why only one of those is your jobThe "side quest" trap, where the whole conversation quietly shifts from your boundary to getting them to approve of itWhat a healthy parent is able to do that yours likely can't, and why that gap isn't something you can close by trying harderHow to get clear on your boundary before you ever bring it to them, so you're not improvising under pressureReady to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. Learn more and get started: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/vault Follow Torie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck If your boundaries keep blowing up or leaving you drowning in guilt, it's usually not you. Learn what problems actually get in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/opt-in Support the show A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors! Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline. You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

    14 min
  7. Stop Explaining Your Boundary to Your Toxic Parent

    8 Jun • The Private Feed Only

    Stop Explaining Your Boundary to Your Toxic Parent

    When you set a boundary with a narcissistic parent, or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, they tend to push back by acting like they don't get it. They argue, they question whether your boundary is even reasonable, they pull you into a debate about whether you should have it at all. It's why these conversations so often end with you backing down, second-guessing yourself, and wondering if you were the unreasonable one all along. In this episode you'll learn: -Why a parent like this pretends not to understand your boundary, and what they're actually doing when they pull you into the back and forth -The difference between setting a boundary and asking for permission, and why only one of those is your job -The "side quest" trap, where the whole conversation quietly shifts from your boundary to getting them to approve of it -What a healthy parent is able to do that yours likely can't, and why that gap isn't something you can close by trying harder -How to get clear on your boundary before you ever bring it to them, so you're not improvising under pressure Ready to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. Learn more and get started: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/vault Get access to bonus content and the entire archive of episodes when you subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private Follow Torie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck If your boundaries keep blowing up or leaving you drowning in guilt, it's usually not you. Learn what problems actually get in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/opt-in

    13 min

  8. 2 Jun

    Setting the Boundary Is Only Part One: What Most Cycle Breakers Miss

    You finally set the boundary and for about five seconds you felt proud of yourself. Then your parent pushed back and wished you could take it all back. When you have a parent with narcissistic or unmanaged borderline personality disorder, boundaries don't land the way you were taught they would.  These types of parents are emotionally dysregulated, rely on you to manage their feelings, and read your boundary as a threat.  It's why so many cycle breakers quietly decide boundaries just don't work for them, when the truth is nobody ever taught them the second half of the process. In this episode you'll learn: What a boundary actually isWhy the same boundary lands fine with an emotionally mature person and is a complete disaster with a parent who has BPD or narcissistic traitsWhy setting the boundary is only half the workThe piece that finally makes your boundaries stickReady to go deeper? The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself.  Learn more and get started at confidentboundaries.com/vault Get access to bonus content and the entire archive of episodes when you subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private Follow Torie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist Support the show A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors! Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline. You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

    14 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
3 Ratings

About

Torie Wiksell, is no stranger to talking about toxic parents and dysfunctional family dynamics. As a therapist Torie focuses on supporting the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. She also grew up with a mother who had an unmanaged personality disorder and understands the uniquely complicated aspects of these relationships. Torie brings a refreshingly relatable perspective to navigating a complicated relationship with a parent who has BPD or narcissistic traits while instilling hope that things can get better and ensuring her listeners they are not alone. Follow Torie on TikTok: tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist Follow Torie on Instagram: instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist Learn more about navigating complicated parent relationships and find resources that can help at www.confidentboundaries.com Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy, nor is it a substitute for therapy. If you are in a mental health crisis, please contact the Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988. You're Not Crazy is a podcast owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

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