When the f**k did I become old?

Jo Parker
  • 5.0 (8)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

When the Fuck Did I Become Old? is the no-holds-barred podcast for everyone over 55 who is done being invisible. Co-hosted by Jo Parker and her partner Kev Stockbridge, this is real talk about ageing from 55 onwards. With humour, honesty and a healthy dose of profanity, Jo and Kev tackle everything from hot flushes and shit sleep to grief, reinvention, sex after 55 and dating in later life. Plus menopause, loneliness, retirement, mental health and the art of staying visible when society wants you to disappear. If you’re over 55 and feel like life is shifting fast physically, emotionally, financially and nobody’s talking about it properly, this is your podcast. Each episode blends Jo and Kev’s raw reflections with unfiltered conversations from guests who have lived a little (and learned a lot). Jo and Kev’s mission? To break the silence around ageing, smash the stereotypes and make getting older something we can laugh at, cry through and fully own….together. It’s ageing, without the airbrushing   Season 1 - The Journney Begins... Season 2 - The Search for a Co-Host Season 3 - A new Co-Host; my partner Kev Stockbridge Subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify   Follow us on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whenthefkdidibecomeold/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/WhenthefkdidIbecomeold/ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@whenthefkdid_i_becomeold YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@WhentheFdidIbecomeold Email us whenthefkdidibecomeold@gmail.com  

  1. 2 DAYS AGO

    Who Needs Friends Anyway? Why Midlife Can Feel Lonely & How Reclaiming Friendships Can Change That!

    KEY TAKEAWAYS Quality over quantity. Research suggests 4–5 deep friendships is all you needLoneliness isn't about being alone — it's the gap between the connection you want and what you haveMidlife is the hardest time to make friends, but also when they matter mostIntentionality is everything — good friendships don't happen by accident anymoreDon't interpret silence as rejection — everyone is busy and overwhelmedAudit your circle: use the Friendship MOT to decide where to invest your timeStart now. There's no better moment to reach out

    40 min

  2. 30 APR

    The Generation Gap

    Every generation thinks it had it hardest. Jo and Kev dig into a Sunday Times article taking a multidimensional look at how Boomers, Gen X, Millennials and Gen Z have fared across five key areas: housing, wages, consumer goods, relationships, and retirement. As parents of four Gen Z kids, this one is personal. Spoiler: the Boomers did have it better — but the picture is more nuanced than the kids would have you believe. KEY TAKEAWAYS Housing: By 30, 50% of Boomers owned a home. First-time buyers today pay £73,800 in their first five mortgage years vs £41,500 for Boomers. The price-to-salary ratio has gone from 4.2x in 1975 to 7.6x today. Boomers had high rates but MIRAS tax relief softened the blow. Jo's 1988 Silvertown flat cost £85k — it's now £400k. Wages: Under-20s are up 20% in real terms thanks to minimum wage rises. Ages 20–27 are flat. Above 27, wages are down. 45% of unemployed 24-year-old Gen Z have never held a job, and graduate oversupply is squeezing entry-level roles. Consumer goods: Milk took 8 working minutes to earn in 1975, now 2. LCD TVs dropped from £4,500 to £279. But lifestyle creep absorbs the gains — one daily Starbucks is £225/month, and subscription stacking adds hundreds more. Relationships: UK marriages fell from 400,000 in 1973 to 224,400 in 2023. Average marriage age has risen a full decade in two generations. Birth rates dropped from 2.93 in 1964 to 1.41 in 2024. Silver divorce is also on the rise. Retirement: Boomers with final salary pensions had it best. Gen X were first to face defined contribution schemes — only 54% have adequate savings. Gen Z need £1,600/month to reach a £3m retirement pot. Their lifeline: the biggest intergenerational wealth transfer in history, if it survives inheritance tax changes. Verdict: Boomers won. Gen X feel the pension pinch. Gen Z face delayed milestones but may inherit on an unprecedented scale. The generation game is not over. TIMESTAMPS 00:09 Welcome and intro to the generation debate01:30 Defining the four generations: Boomers, Gen X, Millennials, Gen Z02:28 Housing: mortgage costs compared across generations05:30 MIRAS, stamp duty wars and the race to complete in the 80s07:14 Wages vs house prices: the salary multiple then and now08:00 Jo's real-world test: his first flat in 1988 vs today10:30 Low-skilled workers and homeownership rates by generation11:30 Gen Z, university degrees and the graduate jobs squeeze14:00 Wages by age group: who's up, flat and down in real terms15:30 Consumer goods: the milk test (8 minutes vs 2 minutes)17:10 Tech prices: LCD TVs from £4,500 to £27919:00 Eating out: genuinely cheaper than 35 years ago20:30 Coffee culture and the £225-a-month Starbucks habit22:30 Subscriptions: the hidden drain no generation faced before24:30 Marriage stats: volume halved, age risen a decade in two generations26:00 Falling birth rates and the drift toward a one-child family28:00 Silver divorce, no-fault legislation and changing social norms30:31 Retirement: final salary pensions vs the defined contribution cliff edge32:30 Auto-enrolment from 2012 and the savings gap it exposed33:50 Gen Z's retirement challenge: the £3 million pot35:20 Inheritance as Gen Z's potential lifeline and the IHT threat37:13 Final verdict: who wins the generation game?

    39 min

  3. 23 APR

    Stop Snoring, Start Sleeping: What You Need to Know About Sleep Apnoea and Ageing

    Timed to coincide with National Stop Snoring Week (27 April to 3 May).  Episode DescriptionJo sits down with sleep psychologist Dr Maja Schaedel to unpack everything nobody tells you about snoring, sleep apnoea and ageing. From why women approaching menopause are increasingly at risk, to whether sleeping in separate bedrooms might actually save your relationship, this conversation covers the practical, the awkward and the surprisingly funny.   Key Takeaways•        Snoring disrupts partners more than snorers themselves. Sleeping apart is not the beginning of the end. •        Women approaching menopause are increasingly likely to snore and develop sleep apnoea due to hormonal and physical changes in the throat. •        Sleep apnoea in women often looks different to men. Watch for fatigue, lethargy, dry mouth and broken sleep rather than obvious snoring. •        Alcohol worsens snoring. Move your drinks earlier in the evening so your body has time to process it before bed. •        There are multiple types of snoring. The BSSAA free interactive sleep test can help identify which type you have before you see a GP. •        A CPAP is still the gold standard for sleep apnoea. Less severe cases may be treated with a mandibular advancement device. •        Magnesium might improve sleep by about 15 minutes. CBT for insomnia (CBT-I) is far more evidence-based. Apps like Sleepio and Sleepful are a good starting point. •        Power naps work best at 15 to 20 minutes. Beyond 30 minutes, you risk sleep inertia and feeling worse than before. •        Sleep quality naturally declines after 55 for both men and women. •        Poor sleep costs the average person around £5,000 a year.  Timestamps00:00  Welcome and introducing Dr. Maja Schaedel and the problem of snoring 01:15  Why partners suffer more than snorers 03:07  Why people snore, menopause, hormones and the snoring link 04:06  Sleeping apart: stigma, reality and relationship benefits 07:04  Sleep apnoea symptoms in women versus men 07:50  How insomnia and sleep apnoea feed each other 10:02  National Stop Snoring Week and the BSSAA 11:05  Sleep position, alcohol and easy lifestyle tweaks 12:35  Types of snoring and the BSSAA sleep test 14:56  What to do if you suspect sleep apnoea 16:30  CPAP, mouth guards and treatment options 18:30  Perimenopause, hormones and disrupted sleep 20:58  Why sleep declines after 55 for everyone 22:16  The perfect power nap (and when it backfires) 24:02  The hidden £5,000 a year cost of bad sleep 25:29 Magnesium, melatonin and what the research actually says 26:10  CBT-I, sleep apps and where to get real help   LinksBritish Snoring and Sleep Apnoea Association: britishsnoring.co.uk The Good Sleep Clinic: goodsleep.clinic/ sleepio.com sleepful.me

    32 min

  4. 16 APR

    The Boomerang Years -we right-sized for two and then the kids came back!

    This week, we cover the full ride from single parenting to empty nesting, downsizing, and now... the kids are back. Spoiler: the Aston Martin didn't help. Whether you're in the thick of solo parenting, watching your kids slowly stop needing you or about to open the front door to a 22-year-old with a suitcase, this one will hit home. IN THIS EPISODE •        The brutal pragmatics of setting up as a single parent: schools, commutes, custody logistics and money •        How your identity quietly disappears when you're the primary carer and how long it takes to get it back •        The surprising emotional gut-punch of empty nesting, even when you thought you were prepared •        From two houses to one: the financial and emotional decision to downsize and move in together •        The week we bought a two-seater Aston Martin... and both kids said "Can I come home?" •        Why we wrote actual house rules before the kids arrived and what made the list KEY TAKEAWAYS •        Nearly 58% of 21-24 year olds and 34% of 24-35 year olds currently live at home with parents. The boomerang effect is real and growing •        Every life stage feels permanent until it suddenly isn't •        The shift from parent to host is a genuine identity challenge •        Setting expectations upfront (yes, in writing) can save a lot of friction •        Short-term stays: skip the rent conversation. Longer-term: consider saving contributions as a deposit fund TIMESTAMPS 00:09  Intro & why this episode is happening right now 02:32  Single parenting after divorce; logistics, finances, identity 09:44  Rebuilding yourself outside the parent role 14:21  Empty nesting: when it hits, even when you saw it coming 19:06  Downsizing from two houses to one life 26:53  Life as a couple with zero kids at home 29:12  The boomerang call… and the Aston Martin timing 31:33  The house rules document 36:15  How to handle money when adult kids move back in

    40 min

  5. 9 APR

    Can You Run in Your 60s? Movement, Mindset & Staying Visible as You Age

    Guest: Julia Chi-Taylor, relationship coach, mentor, and international athlete who has been running for over 60 years. Julia works with people on the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual levels and is still competing in her late 60s.   Key Takeaways•        It's never too late to start running. Begin with lots of walking and a little running, take it slowly, and find a guide who understands you emotionally as well as physically. •        The belief that recovery takes longer as you age is just that, a belief. Mindset and narrative around pain can spiral things down as much as the injury itself. •        Blue Zones (Japan, Sardinia, Okinawa, Loma Linda, Ikaria) show us a different model of communities living well into their 100s through movement, plants, purpose and community. •        Running as meditation: the goal is non-attachment to outcome. Aiming for something AND letting go of the result is the ultimate practice. •        Staying visible as you age is a choice. You can disappear into it, or you can keep showing up with energy. •        If you're starting to exercise later in life, the goal isn't pace or distance; it's whether you enjoyed it. That's the measure of success. •        Reactivity is an arrow to past wounding. Real stillness in running and in life means not reacting from old patterns.   Timestamps00:09  Meet Julia: 50 years of coaching, running since age 6 02:34  How to start running later in life 04:59  Miracles in recovery: real stories 07:24  Jo's deadlift injury and healing journey 09:52  Blue Zones, aging myths and the beliefs we're fed 14:36  Being the oldest in the gym (and why it's great) 16:51  Making yourself invisible  and how to stop 19:11  Julia's spiritual path and the running-meditation connection 26:04  How Julia would coach Jo to start running 29:00  The Happiness Curve and the striving trap 33:13  Where to find Julia + Jo might actually take up running!   Find Juliahttps://juliachitaylor.com

    36 min

  6. 2 APR

    Midlife Reinvention: From Boardroom to DJ Booth

    Ever looked around at your life and thought “is this it?” This week, Jo and Kev are joined by Rosie Freshwater: serial entrepreneur, wife, mum and now a DJ playing gigs across the UK. Rosie's story is one of the most honest midlife reinventions you'll hear. Perimenopause and the empty nest landed at the same time, she started disconnecting from everything she'd worked hard to build and found her way back through music, TikTok and a whole lot of not giving a f**k what anyone thinks. From borrowing her brother-in-law's decks to building a TikTok following as Roo's Renaissance, putting on the UK's first 80s modern remix dance event and planning to swap a country house for a one-bed in Hackney, Rosie is proof it's never too late to start over.   Key Takeaways•        Perimenopause and empty nesting can collide and that identity crash is real •        You don't need a course to start something new; YouTube and borrowed kit will do •        Your existing friends might not get it. That's okay. Go find your tribe •        Reinvention puts pressure on relationships, talking (and therapy) can get you through •        The daytime rave scene is growing and it's genuinely multi-generational •        Success looks different in midlife: happiness and freedom over money and status •        Don't wait for permission. Try the thing. Don't give a f**k what anyone thinks     Timestamps01:55 — Introducing Rosie + the midlife pressure points 04:10 — How the DJ journey started 06:10 — From borrowed decks to TikTok and paid gigs 08:03 — The 80s modern remix concept and live event 10:41 — Why creativity beat career: the total escape moment 11:48 — “ Bit old to do that aren’t you?” 12:45 — Finding a new tribe when your old one doesn’t get it 15:23 — Day raving and the multi-generational club scene 16:27 — Partner and kids: how family reacts to your reinvention 19:42 — Downsizing: letting go of your old identity 22:21 — Empty nest: how the boys are handling the move 25:35 — What’s next: Rue’s Renaissance as a brand and community 29:00 — Rosie’s advice if you’re standing on the edge of change     Find RosieTikTok: @roos_renaissance Instagram @rosiefresh Event: 80s Modern Remix Dance Party — 18th April, Bermondsey Social Club, London, 2pm–9pm     Enjoyed This Episode?Are you in the middle of your own reinvention? Drop us a message — nothing's off the table. Subscribe, leave a review, and share with anyone who needs to hear this.

    31 min

  7. 27 MAR

    Fit and Fabulous at 50

    Fit, Fabulous & Flaunting It: Fitness Over 50What does it actually mean to be fit and fabulous in your 50s and beyond? Jo and Kev dig into the science of why fitness matters more than ever at midlife, covering strength, cardio, and flexibility, while getting real about the overwhelming amount of conflicting advice out there. They celebrate some genuinely inspiring role models (and debate whether their abs are achievable), break down why you wake up feeling like a broken robot, and share practical tips for getting your body moving in the morning without a complete overhaul of your life. Key Takeaways•        Strength, cardio, and flexibility all matter, but you don't have to do everything. Pick what works for you. •        Morning stiffness has actual science behind it: tendons and ligaments shorten with age, and your joints produce less synovial fluid. It's not just you being lazy. •        Hydration is more important than most people realise; your muscles and ligaments are 70% water. •        Maintaining weight loss is harder (and less glamorous) than losing it in the first place. •        A simple morning routine; box breathing, knee hugs, hot shower, ankle rotations can genuinely help. Timestamps00:09  Why fitness matters over 50, strength, cardio, flexibility 02:34  The benefits: bone density, muscle mass, mental health, sleep 03:20  Inspiring role models; Mel C, Gwyneth, JLo, Gillian Anderson 09:43  Dylan Jones on male style and fitness over 50 14:33  Alison Cork's 10 tips for maintaining weight loss 21:23  Jo's progress and why it's harder than expected 23:47  Why you wake up stiff: the science explained 25:00  Morning mobility routine to fix it Resources & Links[Add links here] Enjoyed this episode?Subscribe, leave us a review, and tell a friend. We're on all major podcast platforms. Got a topic you want us to cover? Drop us a message ,nothing is off the table.

    29 min

  8. 20 MAR

    It's Not Your Knees…It's Your Head: Conquering Ski Anxiety in Midlife

    Skiing, Anxiety & the Power of Mindset — with Louise Pode, Ski Mindset Coach   Episode DescriptionJo sits down with Louise Pode, a ski mindset coach based in the UK, for a frank and funny conversation about why so many women over 45 quietly stop doing the things they love and what it actually takes to get back out there. Louise shares her own journey from chronically anxious skier with two replaced hips to leading an international coaching practice and explains how psychology plays a far bigger role on the slopes than most people realise. If skiing has ever terrified you, made you feel like the oldest, slowest person on the mountain or left you questioning why you even bothered, this one's for you.   Key Takeaways•        Your 'why' is everything. Before technique or training, Louise asks every client why they want to ski. That emotional anchor is what gets you through fear on the mountain. •        Women over 45 are more likely to step back than step forward and it's not just about menopause. Decades of prioritising others, cultural expectations and internalised self-doubt all play a role. •        Anxiety physically changes how you ski. Rigidity, leaning back, bracing; fear creates the very instability you're trying to avoid. •        Learning to ski as an adult is genuinely hard. Expecting to crack it in a week sets you up to feel like a failure. Feeling comfortable on skis after a few days is already a win. •        Environment matters enormously. Busy Christmas resorts with packed slopes are the worst place to learn or relearn. A quiet Italian resort beats Courchevel every time. •        Men have anxiety too, they're just less likely to ask for help. Louise's one-to-one clients are almost exclusively women, but men do turn up at group masterclasses. •        Overcoming anxiety is liberating beyond the slopes. Being able to look at a scary run and walk away with your head held high…that's the real goal.   Timestamps00:57  Louise's background: physiotherapy, hip replacements and a love-hate relationship with skiing 02:06  The accident that changed everything and the sliding doors moment that followed 04:31  Why women 45+ tend to step back, not forward 06:52  Male-dominated slopes and the intimidation factor 08:57  How anxiety physically distorts your skiing 11:24  What good learning actually looks like and why your instructor matters, it’s less stressful 12:56  The coaching process; finding your 'why' before anything else 15:45  Louise's own moment of panic at the top of Mont Vallon and how she talked herself down 17:43 The hybrid skiing model for families of mixed abilities 20:06  Do men seek coaching? (Spoiler: sort of) 22:53  What Louise offers - five-session programmes, power-hours and a new online course 25:08  Masterclasses at Tamworth and Hemel Hempstead and what a full day looks like 27:28  Jo's experience and the best advice for anyone thinking of going back   Find Louise•        Website: www.louisepode.com •        Instagram: @coachingwithlou •        Masterclasses coming soon in Hemel Hempstead

    31 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

When the Fuck Did I Become Old? is the no-holds-barred podcast for everyone over 55 who is done being invisible. Co-hosted by Jo Parker and her partner Kev Stockbridge, this is real talk about ageing from 55 onwards. With humour, honesty and a healthy dose of profanity, Jo and Kev tackle everything from hot flushes and shit sleep to grief, reinvention, sex after 55 and dating in later life. Plus menopause, loneliness, retirement, mental health and the art of staying visible when society wants you to disappear. If you’re over 55 and feel like life is shifting fast physically, emotionally, financially and nobody’s talking about it properly, this is your podcast. Each episode blends Jo and Kev’s raw reflections with unfiltered conversations from guests who have lived a little (and learned a lot). Jo and Kev’s mission? To break the silence around ageing, smash the stereotypes and make getting older something we can laugh at, cry through and fully own….together. It’s ageing, without the airbrushing   Season 1 - The Journney Begins... Season 2 - The Search for a Co-Host Season 3 - A new Co-Host; my partner Kev Stockbridge Subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify   Follow us on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whenthefkdidibecomeold/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/WhenthefkdidIbecomeold/ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@whenthefkdid_i_becomeold YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@WhentheFdidIbecomeold Email us whenthefkdidibecomeold@gmail.com  

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