14 episodes

A monthly podcast from Piano Teeth. The voice inside your head. Expect absurd, hilarious and twisted adventures all from the comfort of your own mind. By all means, follow me @the_piano_teeth. And make sure you check me out at www.pianoteeth.co.uk for some extra fun. Go to https://ko-fi.com/pianoteeth to contribute to the bleach fund.

Piano Teeth Piano Teeth

    • Fiction
    • 5.0 • 15 Ratings

A monthly podcast from Piano Teeth. The voice inside your head. Expect absurd, hilarious and twisted adventures all from the comfort of your own mind. By all means, follow me @the_piano_teeth. And make sure you check me out at www.pianoteeth.co.uk for some extra fun. Go to https://ko-fi.com/pianoteeth to contribute to the bleach fund.

    13. BILLIE PIPER DIMENSION STEPPER - PART 3

    13. BILLIE PIPER DIMENSION STEPPER - PART 3

    Hello gorgeous creeps. Here is the final part of the Billie Piper trilogy. In this episode, Billie & Keeley make their way to Stonehenge, where they meet Uther Pendragon and the Druid army. After sacrificing Noel Fielding and activating the stones they then face the celebrity horde for a final showdown that will decide the fate of Earth. Enjoy scum.


     


    Featuring Billie Piper, Druids, Stonehenge, Noel Fielding, Alistair Campbell, Tokyo, Pop-songs, excessive violence, Sean Bean, Idris Elba, David Beckham, Alan Carr, Sandi Toksvig, Danish folksongs, portals and so much more.


     


    Website: https://www.pianoteeth.co.uk/


    Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/Manage/Index


    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_piano_teeth/


    ---


    Original artwork by Chris R. Wright: @brawlingwithmybiro


    Sound design by Matteo Mussetti: @4get2eat


    Jasper did nothing. As per.

    • 57 min
    12. BILLIE PIPER DIMENSION STEPPER - PART 2

    12. BILLIE PIPER DIMENSION STEPPER - PART 2

    Hello there gorgeous creep1


    Here we are, once again, with a brand new audio delight. Ready to fling merrily down your ears and run riot round your mind. Aren't you lucky!


    In this episode, we hear the second part of the previous episode (duh). So if you haven't listened to Part 1 yet...then obviously do that. Billie Piper and Keeley begin making their way to Stonehenge and some very serious truths are revealed. A horde of celebs are laying in wait for them. And they get some help from a couple of Druids.


    Featuring Druids, Stonehenge, Doctor Who, Yerma, Stephen Fry, Alan Carr, Jeremy Clarkson, Idris Elba, Sandi Toksvig, David Baddiel, Frank Skinner and so much more.


    Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/PianoTeeth


    Website: https://www.pianoteeth.co.uk/


    Insta: @the_piano_teeth


    Please note, nothing that happens should be taken seriously. Including the very poor impersonations of the celebrities involved. This whole thing is the incoherent rambling of a mad man with a bleach problem. As a result, it shouldn't be listened to by anyone. Including yourself.


    Enjoy sexy scumbag and be well.


     


     


     

    • 44 min
    11. BILLIE PIPER DIMENSION STEPPER - PART 1

    11. BILLIE PIPER DIMENSION STEPPER - PART 1

    Hello gorgeous creeps.


     


    Did you miss me? I have returned to your heads with a marvellous audio delight, featuring none other than former popstar, turned actor, BILLIE PIPER.


     


    In this episode Jasper is getting ready for his annual Bunga-Bunga party and we hear an overly emotional advert for a car. Then we're sucked down the plughole and meet a taxi driver called Keeley, who meets her idol Billie Piper, holding a gun and stood by a burning car with dead celebrities at her feet. This begins a balls to the w adventure through the streets of London and beyond. Involving many famous faces and a conspiracy that will change the world forever. Please note this is only PART 1, you'll have to wait for the rest you naughty minx.


     


    Featuring Billie Piper, Noel Edmonds, London Taxi's, Bunga-Bunga parties, Cars, Masculinity, Russell Brand, Eddie Redmayne, Motorbikes, Conspiracy theories, Silvio Berlusconi, Dame Judi Dench, Tokyo, Doctor Who.


     


    Follow me on the socials: @the_piano_teeth


    And please donate https://ko-fi.com/pianoteeth


    Website: www.pianoteeth.co.uk


    Sound Designer: Matteo Musetti (@4get2eat)


    Original artwork: Chris R. Wright (@chrisrwright)

    • 28 min
    10. TREEVENGE

    10. TREEVENGE

    Hello my sexy scumbags!


     


    Here's another, brand spanking new audio delight for you to trickle into your ears and allow to run riot round your mind. And what a riot it is!


     


    This episode sees a gang of littering youths being chased through the woods by a vengeful forest Goddess. On top of that, Jasper tries to go on strike and I reveal my new crypto-currency. BleachCoin!


    Follow me on the socials @the_piano_teeth.


    Send something into the Scribble Gallery : https://www.pianoteeth.co.uk/


    Contribute to the bleach fund: https://ko-fi.com/pianoteeth


    The sound was lovingly designed by Matteo Mussetti (@4get2eat)


    And the original artwork was by Chris R. Wright (@chrisrwright)


    PLEASE NOTE: Due to the excessively violent and absurd nature of this podcast. It should not be listened to, by anyone.

    • 1 hr 5 min
    9. KILL YOUR LANDLORD

    9. KILL YOUR LANDLORD

    When Ayishat & Jolyon get a letter from their landlord, they take matters into their own hands.

    • 31 min
    8. SIR DAVID ATTENBOROUGH'S MAGIC CANS

    8. SIR DAVID ATTENBOROUGH'S MAGIC CANS

    Hello Gorgeous Creeps!


    It is I, Piano Teeth. The voice inside your head. Back once again with a barnstorming audio-delight that will completely and utterly blow your socks off.


    Unfortunately, I'm going to have to take a short break after this one. You'll hear why but I need to lay low for a little while. But don't worry, I have grown fond of trickling into your ears and I know how much I mean to you. I will be back my sexy scumbags. I will be back.


    In this episode, I discuss therapy with Jasper the Toad then try and tell the story of Sir David Attenborough's Magic Cans. However, my frequency is hacked by 1 Radio DJ, Dave Chris, who begins trying to take over your brain. I have no choice but to embark on an incredibly dangerous journey, through the radio waves, encountering other Radio DJ's along the way. But Dave Chris has pop sensation Larry Piles in the studio and he's growing stronger and stronger. Will I be able to save your mind in time? Listen and find out.


    Featuring Sir David Attenborough, Crypto-zoology, Gorilla-Hawks, Gerard Depardieu, The Shipping Forecast, Therapy, Theseus, Breakfast Bing Bong, Mental Health, Celebrities, Graham Norton and so much more.


    Don't forget to leave a review. And give me a follow @the_piano_teeth


    If you like what you hear then why not contribute to the bleach fund https://ko-fi.com/pianoteeth


    And please check out the website https://www.pianoteeth.co.uk/ you'll find all sorts there. Including a gallery of scribblings created by the listeners and inspired by my dulcet tones. Why not send me one yourself?


    A tidal wave of thanks must be sent to Matteo Mussetti (@4get2eat) for his loving sound design and making all this possible. And to Chris R. Wright (@chrisrwright) for doing mine and Jasper's portrait. Even if it was through blackmail. And I suppose thanks must be sent your way, for putting me in your ears and letting me meander around your mind. Until next time. Be Well!


    This audio delight is bought to you by Dickie's Meat Drop. Where your meat matters.

    • 40 min

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5
15 Ratings

15 Ratings

twinksb ,

So good it hurts!!

Totally and utterly absurd storytelling told by a surreal Skelton. Laugh out loud, while giving you the jitters! LOVE THIS PODCAST! More please piano Teeth!!!

OldTimer... ,

Ghoulishly Fascinating

Exactly the sort of mind-bending surrealism one needs, especially on those dreary Wednesdays.

Gumtree232 ,

Wonderfully horrible and horribly wonderful

It was gross loved it

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