No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women

Mary Rothwell

No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS. Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more! As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.

  1. From Relationship Ambivalence To Clarity: Ways To Decide Whether To Stay Or Go

    2 DAYS AGO

    From Relationship Ambivalence To Clarity: Ways To Decide Whether To Stay Or Go

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Love should feel honest, not hazy. We sit down with Dr. Merideth Thompson, founder of Partner Lab, to unpack how data-driven insights turn relationship confusion into clarity—whether you’re looking to strengthen a good partnership, repair a drifting one, or leave a harmful dynamic safely. Drawing on research across thousands of couples, Merideth breaks down the surprising heavy-hitters that predict long-term health: perceived partner commitment, perceived partner satisfaction, your own sexual satisfaction, responsiveness to bids for connection, and low controlling conflict—not just “better communication.” Together we explore ambivalence as more than indecision; it’s a signal worth studying. Merideth shares the moment her body knew before her mind did, and how listening to dread, tension, and relief can guide the next right step. We dive into repair done right—being heard before fixing the problem—plus a practical way to reduce the daily micro-ruptures that screens and stress create. You’ll learn why compromise often disappoints both people, and how a simple needs-first approach (think zest vs. juice) can deliver smarter solutions with less resentment. You’ll also get a walk-through of Merideth’s Clarity Matrix, a two-by-two that separates what you can control from what you can’t and maps helpful vs. harmful patterns. We talk scripts for naming needs without blame, how to be “hard on the problem and soft on the person,” and how to use future-self checks to decide if staying aligns with your values. For listeners facing shame around divorce or fear of “failing,” we offer a new frame: a relationship can fail without you being a failure—and modeling healthy love is a profound gift to children. If this episode helped you see your relationship more clearly, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review so more people can find it. Your story might be the spark someone else needs. You can find Merideth at https://www.mypartnerlab.co/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    50 min
  2. From Codependence To Clarity: Creating Healthy Boundaries

    5 MAR

    From Codependence To Clarity: Creating Healthy Boundaries

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! What if the problem isn’t that your boundaries are too soft, but that you were taught they had to be walls? We open this conversation by replacing the brick-and-mortar myth with a living metaphor: doors with windows, sensors, and keypads—flexible limits that protect your peace while keeping connection possible. Together with boundaries coach and recovery podcaster Barb Nangle, we trace the path from codependence and people‑pleasing to clarity and self‑trust. Barb shares the “flashbulb” moments that came through Al‑Anon, CODA, and ACA, the identity shift that followed, and why she sees boundaries as the antidote to codependence. We talk practicals: how to define standards across health, work, and relationships; how to turn values into guardrails; and how to use simple scripts that don’t try to control others but do honor your limits. Expect straight talk on guilt, shame, and the “selfish” label, plus real‑world examples like ending a charged phone call with care or opting out of politics to protect your nervous system. This is also a conversation about physiology and safety. You’ll learn to read early body cues, build internal safety, and move from reactivity to choice. We unpack rumination and catastrophizing, explain why tolerating uncomfortable feelings is a boundary superpower, and show how healthy limits actually deepen intimacy by revealing your true shape. If you’ve ever said yes when you wanted to say no—or swung from no boundaries to fortress mode—this episode offers a middle path: clear, compassionate, and sustainable. If the ideas resonate, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs boundary bravery today, and leave a quick review to help more listeners find these tools. You can find Barb at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    51 min
  3. Racism & Bias: Using Privilege to Amplify Others

    26 FEB

    Racism & Bias: Using Privilege to Amplify Others

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! Mary and Dr. Stacey Pearson-Wharton trace how “being the dot” reveals both hypervisibility and invisibility, why representation changes help-seeking, and how to apologize without defensiveness. We share tools to move from fear to action, build belonging on campus and beyond, and use privilege to amplify others. • reclaiming the violet metaphor and naming white privilege • defining being the dot and its stress impact • microaggressions, implicit bias, and real repair • belonging as design, not accident, in higher ed • representation increasing access to care • speaking up, refusing to shrink, and policy change • ally moves that amplify and protect • guidance for young women of color on mentoring and history • books and local actions that build proximity and courage • offerings from Dr. Stacy for healing and learning Please drop me a text with your thoughts at the link at the top of the show notes You can find Dr. Stacey at https://www.drstaceyinspires.org/ Use code NSV to get 10% of Being the Dot Affirmation Cards Books mentioned in this episode: How to Be an Anti-Racist - Ibram X. Kendi White Fragility - Dr. Robin DiAngelo Black AF History - Michael Harriot My Grandmother's Hands - Resmaa Menakem Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    40 min
  4. From Abuse and Shrinking to Self-Recovery: Unmasking Your True Colors

    19 FEB

    From Abuse and Shrinking to Self-Recovery: Unmasking Your True Colors

    Thoughts or comments? Send us a text! A single sentence can change everything. When Kristen Crabtree heard, “You don’t need her permission to move out,” it shattered years of camouflaging and control, and set her on a path from invisibility to self-recovery. We dive into the quiet mechanics of psychological abuse—rules about when you can speak, isolation that shrinks your world, financial constraints that keep you stuck—and the small, doable actions that start a return to yourself. Kristen, an author and certified divorce coach, brings hard-won insight from her own journey out of a psychologically abusive marriage, including navigating a partner’s undiagnosed NPD traits and the aftermath of trauma therapy. We talk about why self-recovery isn’t self-help: you’re not broken, you’re buried. Using her archaeology-inspired framework, she shows how to excavate the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual “artifacts” that reveal who you are beneath years of adaptive masking. From the “Who am I?” practice to third‑person narration while washing dishes, you’ll get practical tools to quiet monkey mind, build awareness, and make aligned choices. We also explore the chameleon effect—how women learn to blend in for safety—and what it looks like to choose your own colors again, right down to the art on your walls and the clothes on your body. Taste is not trivial; it’s a signal. Kristen’s Tree of Becoming invites growth that’s seasonal and humane: pruning branches that no longer fit, welcoming new buds, and letting identity evolve without apology. If you’ve ever felt trapped between staying and leaving, or unsure where to start, this conversation offers a grounded first step, a language for what you’re feeling, and a reminder that safety built on self-alignment is stronger than safety built on approval. Loved the conversation? Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review telling us the smallest shift you’ll make today. Your story might spark someone else’s turning point. You can find Kristen (and the chameleon) here: https://www.paramourparadox.com/ You can also find her here: https://you2point0.com/ Support the show Sign up for the launch team for my book, Nature Knows, and get free insider news and surprises at https://maryrothwell.net/natureknows Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com. Want to be a guest on No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women? Send Mary Rothwell a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/noshrinkingviolets Follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and check out my website!

    40 min

About

No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS. Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more! As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.