3am Thoughts

Annique Tate
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From Toilet Panic to 3AM Peace: One Woman's Journey Through IBD, Fertility, and Finding Hope in the Dark Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down... but it's not the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. It's the raw, unfiltered truth about trying to become a mother at 40+ while battling IBD, premature ovarian failure, and a medical system that wasn't designed for women like me. This is where I share what really happens when your bowels, your fertility, and your dreams collide. From panic attacks in public toilets to navigating donor eggs, from being dismissed as "too old" to holding my miracle baby at 3am - this is my story, filter-free. What you'll hear: Honest conversations about IBD and fertility (including the farting - because fart loud, fart proud!)What fertility clinics don't tell you about reproductive healthThe emotional reality of premature ovarian failure and donor eggsMedical advocacy and learning to trust yourself over "experts"Hope, tears, and finding peace when everything feels hopelessGuest stories from others on similar journeys This podcast is for: Women struggling with fertility who feel alone despite being surrounded by support. Anyone navigating chronic illness while trying to conceive. People facing age-related prejudice in their fertility journey. Anyone who needs permission to be messy, angry, hopeful, and real about becoming a parent. What makes this different: No filters. No polish. No Instagram-perfect motherhood. Just real stories from the messy middle, the parts nobody talks about but everyone experiences. This isn't medical advice. I'm not a doctor. I'm just someone who's been through it and wants you to know you're not alone in the dark. New episodes: Weekly Your voice deserves to be heard. Always.

  1. 8 HR AGO

    Chapter Eleven - Donor Eggs

    The Questions, The Mistake, and Finding Our Match August 2021. POF diagnosis. Time to move forward with donor eggs. But first, I had to face the questions that haunt every woman making this decision. Then I discovered the mistake. Mount Etna erupting COVID drama at the airport. The donor offer In this episode: ❓ The endless questions about donor eggs and bonding 💔 "What if I don't bond with the baby and Marco leaves me?" 🇬🇧 UK vs abroad: giving the child the right to know their donor 💰 Paying for initial appointments before getting real answers 📊 Asking for blood results and discovering the truth 😱 My estrogen flatlined after progesterone tablets 🩺 "They are experts in getting you pregnant" – not fixing underlying issues ❌ The consultant who shot me down about estrogen therapy 💉 Getting the COVID vaccine – protecting myself to protect the baby 🎯 "The end of fertility treatment was like a release" 📝 The counselling session about talking to your child early 🥚 COVID-depleted egg banks – we wanted fresh eggs anyway 🔬 The last push: laser therapy, Radiant Wonder, visualisation 🌋 Mount Etna erupting while we were in the air to Sicily 🎄 Italian family Christmas – "I wasn't pregnant. But I already knew it. I'd let go." 😰 The first donor offering that wasn't quite right ✈️ Turned away at the airport – Fit2Fly certificate in Italian! 🎉 Finding our donor on our anniversary The brutal truth? The questions are endless. The worry about bonding is real. Discovering your fertility clinic made a mistake that flatlined your estrogen. Turning down a donor and praying another comes. Finally being ready to let go. 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2026/02/12/chapter-eleven-donor-eggs/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: Mushrooms, Mindset and POF https://youtu.be/UeINYZjpq_U ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: My IVF Journey & Catalogue of Errors coming soon 🏠 START FROM THE BEGINNING: Introduction https://youtu.be/ZhZ4TDsj9Lk 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from toilet panic to 3AM peace. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you faced the donor egg bonding questions? Did you choose the UK or abroad for donor conception? Why? Have you discovered a medical mistake that affected your fertility? Has a clinic shot you down when you asked about alternatives? Did you experience the "release" of shifting from your own eggs to donor eggs? Have you turned down a donor? What was that like? How did COVID affect your fertility journey? What does "being ready to let go" look like for you? This is a safe space. Share your story. The questions about donor eggs are valid and real. ⚠️ CONTENT NOTE: This episode discusses donor egg decision-making, fears about bonding with donor-conceived children, discovering medical mistakes that ended own-egg possibilities, the anxiety of turning down donors, COVID travel complications during fertility treatment, and the complex emotions of acceptance and moving forward. Please take care while watching. WHAT'S COMING IN CHAPTER 12: We've found our donor – preparing for the cycle Having fun before IVF begins Trying to adjust medication for my IBD The argument with the nurse about one-size-fits-all protocols "They only adapt if it doesn't work the first time" Realising they don't monitor levels, just dose you high "It doesn't do any harm" (spoiler: not true) Perfect womb lining, IBD still calm The catalogue of clinic errors begins Sent to the wrong place for scans Prescriptions not sent to the dispenser Price increases we weren't told about Charged for things not disclosed as extra costs Allergic reaction email ignored The pregnancy test: positive or negative? My persistence paid off ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the honest truth about the questions that haunt you, the mistakes that change everything, and finding your match on the anniversary that started it all. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts COMMUNITY GUIDELINES: This is a space for support, shared experiences, and honest conversation about donor egg decisions. Be kind. Be respectful. Share your truth. No judgment about choosing donors, where you go for treatment, or the questions that keep you up at night. Just understanding and support. DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health, fertility, and donor egg journey and is not medical advice. Decisions about donor conception, clinic choice, and fertility treatment are deeply personal. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals about your own fertility journey. I have deep respect for medical professionals - this is about sharing my lived experience, including medical mistakes that affected outcomes and the complex emotions of choosing donor eggs.

    16 min

  2. 30 JAN

    Chapter Ten: Mushrooms, Mindset and POF

    The Final Push Before the Diagnosis I'd finally found a doctor who looked at me as a whole and listened. My oestrogen was too high for me to be in menopause, he told me, and I was buzzing. Then came earthing sheets, immunology tests, more food restrictions, gratitude journals, affirmations, and doubled supplements. The relentless optimism and continually picking myself up. In this episode: 🍄 Houri's recommendation: medicinal mushrooms and Dr. Trevor Wing ✨ "Your estrogen would be on the floor if you were in menopause" 🩺 Immunology blood tests and the NHS runaround 🥛 "You're allergic to dairy" - eating gets harder again 😭 Happy to be weepy at Christmas commercials (the medication was working!) 📝 Gratitude journals, affirmations, yoga - the full mindset work 📚 Reading Fearlessly Fertile and going all in ❓ Dr. Wing's gentle question: "Do you want to start thinking about egg donation?" 💪 "I wanted one more try with my bowels in good shape" 🌍 Earthing sheets and the long list of optimisation 🍽️ Food stress hitting its peak - obsessed with everything I ate 💉 To vaccinate or not to vaccinate during fertility treatment 🎫 Turning down VIP Royal Blood tickets to avoid COVID risk 🏥 May, June, July - ovaries still quiet, still quiet, still quiet 📋 August diagnosis: Premature Ovarian Failure (POF) 🤔 "Most doctors wouldn't class it as POF... because I was in my 40s" 💔 The mistake I realised just after my 43rd birthday The brutal truth? Relentless positivity is exhausting. Doing everything "right" while your body refuses to cooperate. The lack of control. The food obsession. Still not being done even when you get the diagnosis. 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2026/01/28/chapter-ten-mushrooms-mindset-and-pof/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: The Straw That Broke the Camel's Back [Link] ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: Donor Eggs coming soon 🏠 START FROM THE BEGINNING: Introduction https://youtu.be/ZhZ4TDsj9Lk 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from toilet panic to 3AM peace. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you experienced relentless positivity becoming exhausting? Have you done "everything right" while your body refused to cooperate? Has food stress or optimisation become obsessive on your journey? Did you face the COVID vaccine decision during fertility treatment? Have you been told you're "too old" for a diagnosis that doesn't have an age limit? How do you cope with a lack of control in fertility treatment? Have you worked on your mindset while your ovaries stayed quiet? What does "doing everything in your power" look like for you? This is a safe space. Share your story. The exhaustion of relentless positivity is real. ⚠️ CONTENT NOTE: This episode discusses POF diagnosis, age prejudice in medical diagnosis, the exhaustion of relentless positivity, food anxiety becoming obsessive, lack of control during COVID restrictions, vaccine hesitancy during fertility treatment, repeated disappointment when ovaries stay quiet, and discovering a mistake that affected IVF outcomes. Please take care while watching. WHAT'S COMING IN CHAPTER 11: The vaccination decision I finally made Searching for an IVF clinic and the pay-to-play system Realising what killed my cycle (but it's not over) Research into forcing cycles vs. waiting Grafting onto ovaries - a new frontier My trial with laser and electro-acupuncture Home estrogen tests and the decision to stop Christmas in Sicily and COVID drama Etna decides to interfere with travel plans Getting denied boarding Finding our donor ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the exhausting, obsessive, hopeful truth about relentless positivity when your ovaries stay stubbornly quiet and you're not ready to give up. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts COMMUNITY GUIDELINES: This is a space for support, shared experiences, and honest conversation about the exhaustion of doing everything "right" on a fertility journey. Be kind. Be respectful. Share your truth. No judgment about how far you go, how much you optimise, or when you decide enough is enough. Just understanding and support. DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health, fertility, and emotional journey and is not medical advice. Decisions about vaccination, supplements, fertility treatments, and optimisation strategies are deeply personal. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals about your own fertility treatment, mental health, and medical decisions. I have deep respect for medical professionals - this is about sharing my lived experience, including the moments when age prejudice affected diagnosis criteria and when relentless positivity became exhausting.

    16 min

  3. 16 JAN

    Chapter Nine - The Straw That Broke the Camel's Back

    When Hope Becomes Exhausting July 2020. We booked a UK fertility clinic. I had my first scan. The doctor told me I had a "beautifully healthy reproductive system." I nearly skipped out of the clinic. The never-ending cycle of hope and disappointment - rinse and repeat. October 1st: Sitting alone in a waiting room, in tears, while Marco waited outside in the car. Not allowed in. In this episode: 🇮🇹 Last adventures in tourist-free Italy before heading back 🏥 July 13th scan: "You have a beautifully healthy reproductive system" 🎉 The vindication moment - I nearly skipped out of the clinic 💊 Progesterone tablets to kick-start my cycle 😊 Walking on Devil's Dyke bubbling with positivity - "This is it!" 🩸 My first period in over a year - never thought I'd be so happy 📉 IVF cycle scan: quiet ovaries, low estrogen, high LH 😤 My birthday beach rant and Marco saying "everything will be fine" 💔 When your rock doesn't know what to say (even when you told them what to say) 🤷 The fertility doctor's shrug that said everything 🏜️ "My ovaries were a ghost town" 😢 Sitting alone in the waiting room because of COVID restrictions 💸 The clinic holding back £500 for a "cancelled cycle" I had to fight for 🍄 Houri's recommendation: medicinal mushrooms and Dr. Trevor Wing The brutal reality? Tenacity pouring out of your eyeballs. Hope and crushing disappointment on repeat. Having to pick yourself up again and again until there's nothing left. 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2026/01/15/chapter-nine-the-straw-that-broke-the-camels-back/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: The Question That Breaks You https://youtu.be/RBRLlPZgsH0 ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: Mushrooms, Mindset and POF coming soon 🏠 START FROM THE BEGINNING: Introduction https://youtu.be/ZhZ4TDsj9Lk 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from toilet panic to 3AM peace. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you experienced the exhausting cycle of hope and crushing disappointment? Have you been told you have a "healthy" reproductive system when things clearly aren't working? Has your partner said something well-meaning that made you angrier? Have you realized your fertility doctor doesn't know how to help with underlying issues? Have you received devastating news alone due to COVID restrictions? How many times have you had to pick yourself up off the floor? Do you have tenacity pouring out of your eyeballs even when you're exhausted? This is a safe space. Share your story in the comments. The exhaustion is real. You're not alone. ⚠️ CONTENT NOTE: This episode discusses repeated IVF failure, the emotional exhaustion of constant hope and disappointment, premature ovarian failure (POF), relationship strain when well-meaning comfort doesn't help, being alone during devastating medical news due to COVID restrictions, and the moment when your body gives up even though you're not ready to. Please take care while watching. WHAT'S COMING IN CHAPTER 10: Medicinal mushrooms and a new approach Dr. Trevor Wing at the Women's Natural Health Clinic "Your estrogen is too high to be in menopause" Finally, someone not fixated on FSH Six months of super clean living Another diet amendment and mindset work The vaccine question during fertility treatment BOOK RECOMMENDATION (Not sponsored): Period Repair Manual: Natural Treatments for Better Hormones and Better Periods by Lara Briden ND ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, exhausting, heartbreaking, hopeful truth about what it means to have tenacity pouring out of your eyeballs when your body won't cooperate. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts COMMUNITY GUIDELINES: This is a space for support, shared experiences, and honest conversation about the exhausting reality of fertility journeys. Be kind. Be respectful. Share your truth. Every woman's journey is different, and the exhaustion is real. No judgment about how many times you try, when you stop, or what decisions you make. Just understanding and support. DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health, fertility, and emotional journey and is not medical advice. The decisions I faced are deeply personal, and everyone's path is different. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals and mental health providers about your own fertility journey. I have deep respect for medical professionals - this is about sharing my lived experience and the questions many women face but rarely discuss openly

    15 min

  4. 19/12/2025

    Chapter Eight - The Question that Breaks You

    March 2020. The fertility consultant said "menopause" and refused treatment. COVID locked us down in Italy. I was dismissed everywhere I turned because I was over 40. And then I had to face the question that shatters every woman on this fertility journey: What am I willing to do to have a child? Donor eggs? Would I bond with them? Would they love me? Adoption? Should Marco find someone easier? How far do I push before I accept defeat? This is about the questions we ask ourselves alone, usually crying, that nobody prepares you for. In this episode: 😢 The paralysis after being told "no further treatment" 💪 What boundless hope, relentless tenacity, and rock-hard resilience really mean 📧 My desperate emails to Jessica: "I'm grasping at straws" 🔒 COVID lockdown taking away my coping mechanism (running) 🩺 Understanding that fertility clinic doctors aren't fertility specialists 👵 Facing age-related prejudice from medical professionals at 40+ 💔 The question that reduced me to pieces: What am I willing to do? 🤱 The donor egg torment: Would I love them? Would they love me? 👶 The adoption question: Should Marco find someone easier? 😭 Breaking down on a bench, unable to pretend to be normal 💍 Offering Marco a way out (and why my friend told me off) ❤️ Marco's answer that changed everything The brutal truth? This journey requires you to ask yourself impossible questions with no right answers, while everyone tells you you're too old to keep trying. 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2025/12/12/chapter-seven-the-long-road-down/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: The Long Road Down https://youtu.be/RBRLlPZgsH0 ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: Follicles, Ovulation and the Straw 🏠 START FROM THE BEGINNING: Introduction https://youtu.be/ZhZ4TDsj9Lk 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from toilet panic to 3AM peace. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you faced the "What am I willing to do?" question on your fertility journey? Have you considered donor eggs or adoption? What emotions came up? Have you been dismissed by doctors because of your age? Have you offered your partner a way out because you felt like a burden? How do you pick yourself up when hope dissolves? What does "advanced maternal age" mean to you? This is a safe space. Share your story in the comments. You're not alone in these questions. ⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: This episode discusses the deep emotional trauma of fertility struggles, age-related medical prejudice, difficult decisions about donor eggs and adoption, relationship strain, offering your partner a way out, mental health impacts of repeated dismissal, and the isolation of facing impossible questions. Please take care while watching. WHAT'S COMING IN CHAPTER 9: A Zoom consultation with the UK fertility clinic The journey back to the UK during a pandemic A scan that shows something unexpected "Your beautifully healthy reproductive system" Follicles, perfect timing, and my anger when it still doesn't work Another scan with different results Progesterone tablets The straw that broke the camel's back KEY MOMENTS FROM THIS CHAPTER: 😭 The first time I was truly paralyzed and silenced 📧 "I'm grasping at straws... Sorry to bother you" 🔒 COVID lockdown: "There were a lot of people walking stuffed dogs" 😤 "Everywhere I turned, I was dismissed because I was over 40" 💡 "Fertility clinic doctors aren't fertility specialists – they're specialists in getting you pregnant" 💔 "What am I willing and happy to do to have a child?" 🤱 "Would I bond with them? Would they love me the same?" 👶 "Marco could find someone else. Why go through all this?" 😢 "I was falling apart, battling a question I didn't want to face" 🚪 "I offered Marco a way out" ❤️ "Just as long as it's with you" ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, real, heartbreaking, hopeful truth about the questions we all face but rarely talk about. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts COMMUNITY GUIDELINES: This is a space for support, shared experiences, and honest conversation about the hardest questions in fertility journeys. Be kind. Be respectful. Share your truth. Every woman's journey and decisions are valid. No judgment. No unsolicited advice. Just understanding and support. DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health, fertility, and emotional journey and is not medical advice. The decisions I faced are deeply personal, and everyone's path is different. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals and mental health providers about your own fertility journey. I have deep respect for medical professionals - this is about sharing my lived experience and the questions many women face but rarely discuss openly.

    16 min

  5. 12/12/2025

    Chapter Seven - The Long Road Down

    When Vindication Met Devastation December 2019. I'm planning our move to Sicily with military precision, Trello boards, spreadsheets, endless coordination. My hair's growing back, my business is thriving, and we're finally ready to seriously try for a baby. Then came the 30-hour drive with our cat, a sonogram that proved I'd been right all along, and a fertility consultant who refused to listen. Blood tests on Friday. Devastating results on Saturday. COVID lockdown on Sunday. We were trapped in Italy with nowhere to turn, and my fertility window was apparently closing for good. In this episode: 🚗 The epic 2,500km drive to Sicily (with Dory the cat and Dance Monkey on repeat) ✈️ Berlin birthday trip and growing symptoms 🏥 The family GP who actually listened and did a sonogram 🎉 VINDICATION: "You're still ovulating, just not menstruating" 😤 The fertility consultant who sounded exactly like UK GPs: "Menopause" 📊 Blood tests on a Friday that shattered everything 🦠 COVID lockdown trapping us in Italy the next day 😢 When hope dissolves in 48 hours This chapter covers: Planning a major international move while managing IBD and fertility The reality of a 30-hour drive through Europe Finding a doctor who actually listens (for 60 euros!) The moment of vindication: proving you're still ovulating Medical dismissiveness even with evidence How COVID timing destroyed our fertility plans Being trapped with nowhere to turn 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2025/12/12/chapter-seven-the-long-road-down/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: Summer in Sicily https://youtu.be/vWJJXx7zT44 ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: My Fertility Fight coming next week 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from toilet panic to 3AM peace. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you ever had vindication followed immediately by devastation? Has a doctor dismissed evidence that contradicted their assumptions? Did COVID lockdown interrupt your fertility journey or medical treatment? Have you experienced the fixation on one single hormone despite other evidence? What does "advanced maternal age" mean to you? Share your stories in the comments - this is a judgment-free, supportive space. ⚠️ CONTENT NOTE: This episode discusses medical dismissiveness, age-related prejudice in fertility treatment, loss of a grandparent, COVID lockdown impact on fertility journeys, and the emotional whiplash from hope to despair. WHAT'S COMING IN CHAPTER 8: Reaching out to my homeopath when I had nowhere else to turn Understanding the prejudice women face with "advanced maternal age" Why doctors fixate on one hormone instead of the whole picture The revelation: IVF doctors aren't fertility specialists, they're pregnancy specialists Marco being my unwavering rock through the tears A UK clinic webinar during lockdown The scan showing my "beautifully healthy reproductive system" Progesterone tablets: the straw that broke the camel's back KEY MOMENTS FROM THIS CHAPTER: 💪 Finally proving I was still ovulating 😤 "Menopause" - the word that kept coming back 🚫 "No further treatment" via WhatsApp 🦠 COVID walls going up across Italy 💔 Hope dissolving in 48 hours 🔒 Trapped with my fertility window "closing" ✊ Deciding I wasn't done fighting QUOTABLE MOMENTS: 💬 "You're still ovulating. You've released an egg. You're just not menstruating." 💬 "I knew it. Houri knew it. Jessica knew it." 💬 "No further treatment." 💬 "The next day, COVID hit hard. The walls went up. We were trapped." 💬 "My fertility window was apparently closing for good." #TheLongRoadDown #FertilityJourney #COVIDLockdown #MedicalDismissiveness #AdvancedMaternalAge #StillOvulating #MenopauseAssumption #FertilityStruggles #IBDJourney #Vindication #ChronicIllness #RealTalk #FilterFree #WomensHealth #FertilityOver40 #PandemicImpact ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, real, hopeful truth. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts COMMUNITY GUIDELINES: This is a space for support, shared experiences, and honest conversation. Be kind. Be respectful. Share your truth. Everyone's journey is valid. DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health and fertility journey and is not medical advice. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals about your own health and fertility concerns. I have deep respect for medical professionals - this is about sharing my lived experience and advocating for better patient care.

    12 min

  6. 09/12/2025

    Acupuncture for Fertility in Your 40s: Real Talk with Houri Alavi

    Can acupuncture really support fertility after 40? I sat down with Houvi Alavi, my acupuncturist, to get honest answers about how this ancient therapy actually works for modern fertility challenges. In this conversation, we dive into: ✨ The science behind acupuncture and fertility ✨ What acupuncture can specifically address for women over 40 ✨ How it regulates hormones and manages stress during the fertility journey ✨ The reality of egg quality vs. quantity ✨ How acupuncture works alongside IVF treatment ✨ What to look for when choosing a fertility acupuncturist ✨ Real expectations and the "magic 3 months" concept This isn't about miracle cures or false hope; it's about understanding all your options and making informed choices for your unique journey. Whether you're just starting your fertility journey, supporting IVF, or exploring complementary therapies, this conversation offers practical insights and real wisdom. Find Houri Alavi: (www.hourialavi.com) DISCLAIMER: The information in this video is based on personal experience and professional insights, but it's not medical advice. Always consult with your qualified healthcare provider before starting any new treatment. Your journey is unique to you. 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2025/12/04/finding-the-right-needle-my-journey-with-fertility-acupuncture/ 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters chronicling my journey through IBD, fertility struggles, and ultimately, hope. 💭 Join the Conversation: Have you tried acupuncture for fertility or other health issues? What was your experience? If you're over 40 and on a fertility journey, what's been your biggest challenge so far? What complementary or alternative therapies have helped you during your fertility journey? Did anything Houri said surprise you about how acupuncture works? How do you manage stress during the fertility process? What actually works for you? Have you found healthcare providers who truly listen and support your journey? Share their approach! What questions do you wish someone had asked Houri? Drop them below! For those who've combined acupuncture with IVF - what was your experience? What's one thing you wish you'd known earlier in your fertility journey? How do you navigate the advice overload when everyone has an opinion on what you "should" try? Remember: This is a judgment-free space. Share your story, ask questions, support others. We're all in this together. Next week: Chapter 7 - The Long Road Down (A road trip to Sicily with life-changing news and a devastating diagnosis) ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, real, hopeful truth. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts

    29 min

  7. 28/11/2025

    Chapter Six - Summer in Sicily

    Vindication, Eggs, and What My Missing Period Really MeantAfter three months of religiously following the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, the moment finally arrived. My consultant ran the tests. Inflammation: completely gone. Iron levels: back to normal. And she actually said the words: "You don't have Crohn's." I was right all along. But she immediately diagnosed me with Ulcerative Colitis instead. I still didn't agree. And my period? Still missing. Still dismissed as menopause by UK doctors. What I didn't know was that none of it was what it seemed. In this episode: 🇮🇹 SCD diet in Sicily (spoiler: SO many eggs) 🏃‍♀️ Running with one disgusting public toilet 🏖️ Beautiful beaches I couldn't enjoy (toilet anxiety) 🥚 The egg-based existence 🪟 Our flat gets burgled while we sleep 📠 Italian bureaucracy: fax machines in 2019 👮 Police who take statements and do nothing 💇‍♀️ Hair falling out by the handful 🩺 The "chocolate teapot" doctor 💆‍♀️ Hair loss treatment: lavender oil and tedious routines ✅ The vindication ❓ New diagnosis (I still disagreed) 📅 My period: still MIA, still not menopause The truth I didn't know yet: My missing period wasn't what UK doctors claimed. And I was about to find out why. 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2025/11/28/chapter-six-summer-in-sicily/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: What Do You Want Us to Do Miss Tate? ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: Road Trip to Catania coming soon 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters following my journey from medical gaslighting to finally getting real answers. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you ever been proven right after doctors dismissed you for months?Has anyone given you conflicting diagnoses that didn't make sense?What's your experience with the SCD or similar elimination diets?Have you experienced hair loss after trauma or medical crisis?Has anyone dealt with missing periods being dismissed as "just menopause"? This is a space for real experiences - share your stories. ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, real, hopeful truth. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts ⚠️ CONTENT NOTE: This episode discusses SCD diet challenges, home burglary, Italian medical bureaucracy, hair loss after trauma, medical vindication, and the mystery of a missing menstrual cycle. Recovery chapter with building intrigue. DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health journey and is not medical advice. The SCD diet worked for me, but it may not be suitable for everyone. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals about your own health concerns. I have deep respect for the NHS and medical professionals while sharing my personal experiences with the system.

    12 min

  8. 21/11/2025

    Chapter Five - What Do You Want Us to Do, Miss Tate?

    Chapter 5: When I Was Right All Along Sunday, 16 June, 2019. I'm in A&E. My iron is 81. My inflammation is 97. My body is eating itself. The doctor asks, "What do you want us to do, Miss Tate?" All I can say is: "I just want someone to make me better." This is the chapter where I get admitted to hospital. Where they tell me I have characteristics of Crohn's. Where I react to yet more medications. And where I finally take control and save myself. In this episode: 🏥 A&E to admission: finding a bed at midnight 💉 IV steroids and another sigmoidoscopy 🩺 "You have characteristics of Crohn's" ❌ The consultant who won't hear "allergic reaction" 🤷‍♀️ "How do you go from mild to Crohn's in one month?" 🚫 No dietitian referrals "because NHS doesn't do that anymore" 🍽️ Hospital food when you have severe restrictions (spoiler: just salad) 💊 Prednisolone: my face and legs swell up massively 👵 "I looked like my Great Nan" 📞 "Persevere for 10 more days" - I couldn't 🥗 Discovering the Specific Carbohydrate Diet (SCD) 💪 Within days: running again, symptoms disappearing 🎯 The vindication ✅ I was right all along 📖 READ THE FULL CHAPTER: https://3amthoughts.me/2025/11/19/chapter-5-what-do-you-want-us-to-do-miss-tate/ 🎙️ LISTEN ON PODCAST: https://bit.ly/3amThoughtspodcast ⏮️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER: USA, Menopause and Fight or Flight https://youtu.be/eFvCLtYvbR8 ⏭️ NEXT CHAPTER: Summer in Sicily coming soon 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly chapters chronicling my journey through IBD, fertility struggles, and ultimately, hope. 💬 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Have you ever been right about your diagnosis when doctors wouldn't listen? Has anyone dismissed your suggestion of allergic reactions to medication? Have you had to research and implement your own treatment when medicine failed? What alternative approaches have worked for you with chronic illness? Share your stories - this is a community of people who get it. ABOUT THIS SERIES: From toilet panic to 3AM peace - this is my unfiltered journey through five years of IBD, fertility struggles, premature ovarian failure, and becoming a mother through donor eggs. No filters. No AI polish. Just the messy, real, hopeful truth. Your voice deserves to be heard. Always. 📧 CONTACT: to3amthoughts@gmail.com 📱 CONNECT: Insta - @my_3_amthoughts DISCLAIMER: This content shares my personal health and fertility journey and is not medical advice. The supplements and protocols mentioned worked for me but may not be suitable for everyone. Always consult qualified healthcare professionals about your own health concerns. #Chapter5 #PatientAdvocacy #MedicalVindication #SpecificCarbohydrateDiet #SCD #IBDRecovery #ChronicIllness #TakingControl #SelfAdvocacy #MedicalGaslighting #IBDJourney #AlternativeHealth #GutHealth #ProvenRight #FilterFree #RealTalk

    14 min
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About

From Toilet Panic to 3AM Peace: One Woman's Journey Through IBD, Fertility, and Finding Hope in the Dark Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down... but it's not the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. It's the raw, unfiltered truth about trying to become a mother at 40+ while battling IBD, premature ovarian failure, and a medical system that wasn't designed for women like me. This is where I share what really happens when your bowels, your fertility, and your dreams collide. From panic attacks in public toilets to navigating donor eggs, from being dismissed as "too old" to holding my miracle baby at 3am - this is my story, filter-free. What you'll hear: Honest conversations about IBD and fertility (including the farting - because fart loud, fart proud!)What fertility clinics don't tell you about reproductive healthThe emotional reality of premature ovarian failure and donor eggsMedical advocacy and learning to trust yourself over "experts"Hope, tears, and finding peace when everything feels hopelessGuest stories from others on similar journeys This podcast is for: Women struggling with fertility who feel alone despite being surrounded by support. Anyone navigating chronic illness while trying to conceive. People facing age-related prejudice in their fertility journey. Anyone who needs permission to be messy, angry, hopeful, and real about becoming a parent. What makes this different: No filters. No polish. No Instagram-perfect motherhood. Just real stories from the messy middle, the parts nobody talks about but everyone experiences. This isn't medical advice. I'm not a doctor. I'm just someone who's been through it and wants you to know you're not alone in the dark. New episodes: Weekly Your voice deserves to be heard. Always.

Information

  • Creator
    Annique Tate
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    13
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    3am Thoughts