3 HR AGO

TAM+ EP 109 Unlocking Your Inner Optimist: How Your Attention Shapes Your Reality

Ever wonder why two people can experience the exact same event but walk away with completely different emotions? In this fascinating episode of The Addicted Mind Podcast Plus, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind dive into the science of optimism and reveal how our attention shapes our reality. They explain that optimism isn't about ignoring negative experiences or forcing positivity – it's about training our brain to process both positive and negative information in a balanced way. Through practical examples and evidence-based strategies, they show listeners how to break free from negative thought spirals and develop genuine optimistic thinking. Whether you're dealing with anxiety, depression, or just want to build more resilience, this episode offers simple yet powerful tools to help you unlock your inner optimist and transform how you experience life's challenges. Download: Unlocking Your Inner Optimist Worksheet Key Topics The difference between toxic positivity and genuine optimismHow attention bias affects our experience of eventsThe science behind optimistic versus pessimistic thinkingThree evidence-based strategies for developing optimismThe role of physical movement in changing perspectiveHow optimism builds resilience and creativityPractical daily exercises for training your brain Timestamps [00:01:27] The power of perspective: Same event, different experiences [00:03:42] The science behind attention and optimism [00:05:19] Why this isn't toxic positivity [00:09:30] Introduction to practical strategies [00:09:54] The two-chair technique explained [00:11:28] The daily spotlight exercise [00:13:02] The reframe challenge technique See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

16 min

3 DAYS AGO

Episode 383: War Flower: Sobriety, Self-Compassion, and Off-Grid Healing with Robert Stark

In this episode of The Addicted Mind, host Duane Osterlind sits down with author, veteran, and off-grid farmer Robert "Bob" Stark. Bob shares his powerful journey of overcoming an 18-year battle with substance abuse, transitioning back to civilian life after parachuting into Iraq during the initial invasion, and deconstructing the rigid constraints of hyper-masculinity. Bob opens up about how he used writing to process unaddressed childhood and combat traumas, moving from anger and blame to deep internal healing. Today, Bob celebrates 11 years of clean and sober living on a 40-acre off-grid farm in the Kenai Peninsula of Alaska, where he is learning to balance strength with the gentleness his family deserves. Tune in to hear an inspiring conversation about resilience, the power of putting pen to paper, and the continuous journey of transformation. Key Takeaways & Highlights The Reality of Post-Combat Transition: Bob shares the stark contrast of sleeping with a rifle by his side in Iraq to sleeping in his car just two weeks later, highlighting the hyper-vigilance and isolation many veterans face.Breaking Out of the "Man Box": A deep dive into the societal expectations of male stoicism. Bob discusses the challenge of moving away from the "power through it alone" mentality to embrace emotional vulnerability and gentleness as a father.Writing as a Catalyst for Healing: Bob reveals why he is his most honest self when putting pen to paper. He shares how writing his two books allowed him to reframe his life experiences and process deep traumas without finger-pointing or resentment.Manifesting Dreams Off-Grid: From living with candles, oil lanterns, and no refrigeration to building a thriving 40-acre solar-powered farm with his family, Bob talks about the power of vision boards and relentless action.Action Beats Stagnation: Why thriving in recovery requires a willingness to keep trying new therapies, habits, and paths until something finally sticks.Bob’s One Piece of Advice: If you are feeling lost or stuck, start with the smallest foundational pieces: look at your lifestyle, your routine, your diet, and your sleep habits. Robert Stark (Bob) is an Army veteran who served four and a half years in the military, including a deployment as a paratrooper during the invasion of Iraq. He is the author of two deeply personal books, War Flower and Just Like a Soldier, which chronicle his experiences with trauma, military life, and long-term recovery. Bob has been clean and sober for 11 years and lives off-grid in Alaska with his wife, Savannah, and their four children, where they run their family farm, Secret Garden Alaska. Resources & Links Mentioned Robert's Website & Farm: Secret Garden Alaska (Find his books, blog, and products here)Books by Robert Stark: * War FlowerJust Like a SoldierYouTube Channel: Secret Garden Alaska Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast. Supporting Resources: If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center NovusMindfulLife.com We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind Disclaimer See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

33 min

11 MAY

Episode 382: Revolutionizing Recovery: Using Data to Speed Up Healing With Nawal Roy

In this episode, Duane Osterlind talks with Nawal Roy, the visionary behind Holmusk, the world’s largest clinical data platform for mental health. After a successful career in finance, Nawal pivoted to healthcare, driven by the realization that mental health is one of the most complex, yet least quantified, areas of medicine. They dive deep into how Holmusk has spent 11 years building a "scientific-grade" database of over 42 million patients, shifting mental health care away from "hunches and poetry" toward precision and evidence-based science. Key Discussion Points The Data Gap in Mental Health: Historically, mental health treatment has relied on clinician intuition rather than hard data. Nawal explains how Holmusk "normalizes" messy, unstructured electronic health records to create a searchable, scientific database.The 10-Year Wait: Data reveals a heartbreaking reality: the average journey from the onset of symptoms to receiving meaningful care is 8 to 10 years.Ending the Trial-and-Error Cycle: A typical acute patient might cycle through 10 to 12 different medications over 18 months before finding what works. Nawal discusses how large-scale data can help clinicians find the right treatment faster.The Power of Comorbidity: Mental health doesn't exist in a vacuum. Treating depression can significantly improve outcomes for physical conditions like diabetes, yet these are often treated as separate issues.Measurement-Based Care: Nawal argues that "engagement is not outcome." He highlights the desperate need to move toward a system that measures functional improvement (like GAF or CGI scores) rather than just "showing up for therapy."AI and the Future of Psychiatry: How Holmusk is using Natural Language Processing (NLP) to "read" thousands of unstructured doctor's notes and train AI models to provide clinically accurate—not just "nice sounding"—guidance. "Mental health is currently closer to poetry than science... we need to bring the level of rigor found in pediatric oncology to the mental health community." — Nawal Roy "You can't improve what you don't measure. If we have data, we can actually make real, significant change to people's lives." — Duane Osterlind Big Takeaways Demand Data: Patients and stakeholders should demand that mental health be treated with the same clinical rigor as physical health.Outcome over Engagement: Simply attending sessions isn't enough; we must measure whether the patient is actually getting better.The Role of AI: AI has the potential to democratize access to care, but it must be trained on massive, clinically valid datasets to avoid "hallucinations" and provide safe, effective support.Resources Mentioned Holmusk: holmusk.comNeuroBlue: Holmusk’s flagship data analytics platform.ACE Study: Referenced by Duane regarding Adverse Childhood Experiences and their long-term health impacts. LinkedIn: Nawal Roy Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast. Supporting Resources: If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center NovusMindfulLife.com We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind Disclaimer See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

35 min

7 MAY

TAM+ EP 108 Breaking Free: Why Shame (Not Guilt) Is Sabotaging Your Recovery

Download: Shame Sabotaging Your Recovery Worksheet Have you ever noticed that after a slip in recovery, your thoughts immediately jump to "I'm worthless" or "I'm never going to get better"? These aren't just random negative thoughts – they're part of a powerful emotion that might be secretly sabotaging your recovery journey. In this eye-opening episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind dive deep into the crucial difference between guilt and shame in addiction recovery. Through evidence-based research and practical experience, they reveal why many people mistakenly identify their shame as guilt, and how this misunderstanding can keep them trapped in the addiction cycle. The hosts share three powerful, scientifically-backed tools that listeners can start using immediately to build shame resilience and strengthen their recovery journey. Whether you're in recovery yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode offers essential insights into breaking free from the destructive grip of shame while building a healthier relationship with yourself and others. KEY TOPICS The critical difference between guilt ("I made a mistake") and shame ("I am a mistake")How toxic shame fuels the addiction cycleResearch findings on shame's direct link to substance use problemsThe importance of shame resilience in recoveryThree easy tools for breaking the shame spiralThe role of connection and community in overcoming shamePractical language shifts for transforming shame into growthTIMESTAMPS [00:01:20] Introduction to shame's impact on recovery [00:02:31] Research findings on shame vs. guilt in addiction [00:04:00] How toxic shame creates a negative cycle [00:08:14] First tool: The Language Shift technique [00:09:40] Second tool: The Shame Interrupt method [00:11:00] Third tool: The Connection Practice [00:13:40] Community resources and next steps See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

15 min

27 APR

Episode 381: The Neurobiology of Betrayal: Why Trust Shatters and How to Rebuild with Dr. Stan Tatkin

This episode features a deep dive into the complex neurobiology of betrayal with Dr. Stan Tatkin, the developer of PACT (A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy). Hosted by Duane Osterlind, the conversation explores why betrayal feels like an existential threat, the role of shame in stalling recovery, and the "hard pills" that must be swallowed for true relationship restoration. The Anatomy of Betrayal Betrayal is often misunderstood as simply a sexual or financial act. Dr. Tatkin defines it more deeply as the violation of the free flow of vital information. Identity Shattering: When vital information is withheld, the discovery partner's entire history, identity, and sense of reality are retroactively altered.The "Secret Basement": Engaging in deceptive behaviors creates a psychological "basement" that triggers a "sleeping with the enemy" dynamic once revealed.The Neurobiology of Discovery The brain of a betrayed partner enters a state of Post-Traumatic Stress (PTSD). Automatic Re-sorting: For approximately one year after discovery, the brain will automatically resort every past memory to fit the new data—this happens without the person’s permission.Hypervigilance: Because the "safe" environment (the partner) has become a "threat" environment, the survival system remains stuck in the "on" position.The "Distancing" Betrayer Dr. Tatkin notes that a large majority of "secret keepers" fall into the avoidant/distancing attachment group. Adaptation over Choice: Avoidant behaviors often stem from early childhood neglect where the infant learned to "auto-regulate" through fantasy and compartmentalization rather than seeking comfort from others.Self-Objectification: These individuals may treat partners as "self-objects"—extensions of themselves—rather than separate people with their own rights and feelings.The Role of Shame vs. Guilt Shame is often the greatest hurdle to healing. Parasympathetic Collapse: Shame feels like a physical "bleeding out" or exposure of one's guts.The Trap of Self-Flagellation: When a betrayer indulges in their own shame, they effectively "role-reverse," forcing the betrayed partner to care for them.Justice and Fairness: For a relationship to heal, the betrayer must move from shame (which is about self) to contrition and guilt (which is about the harm caused to the other).Key Takeaways for Healing Boundaries Save Relationships: Dr. Tatkin argues that the betrayed partner must "throw down" and be willing to leave. For the betrayer to change, they must lose the relationship they thought they had. Without consequences, there is no motivation for character change.The Burden is on the Secret Keeper: To repair the bond, the betrayer must be willing to be the "hero, the healer, and the villain" simultaneously, falling on their sword repeatedly without complaining about the length of the process.Co-Regulation is Essential: We heal through the eyes of others. While the betrayer cannot look to the betrayed partner for comfort initially, they must find groups, therapists, or "unafraid others" to help regulate their shame.Tools for Self-Regulation:Journaling: Distancing yourself from the "movie" in your head by putting it on paper.Talking Aloud: Naming emotions (e.g., "Right now I feel humiliated") to engage the prefrontal cortex and interrupt the "silent running" of toxic self-talk.Resources Mentioned The PACT Institute: thepactinstitute.comBooks by Stan Tatkin: Wired for Love, We Do, and In Each Other's Care.Duane Osterlind: Novus Counseling"Attachment biology tells us on an existential level: I can't quit you, it feels like death. But I can't live with you either. This is the 'dark side' of attachment that keeps us in relationships even when we shouldn't be—unless we stand on principle." > — Dr. Stan Tatkin Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast. Supporting Resources: If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center NovusMindfulLife.com We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind Disclaimer See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

56 min

23 APR

TAM+ EP 107 From Self-Blame to Self-Compassion: Breaking the Addiction Shame Cycle

Download: From Self-Blame to Self-Compassion Recovery Worksheet. Are you your own worst enemy in recovery? This episode tackles the hidden barrier that keeps many people stuck in addiction - a harsh inner critic. Hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind explore how self-blame can sabotage recovery efforts and share research-backed strategies for developing self-compassion. Drawing from Dr. Kristen Neff's groundbreaking research, they explain why being kind to yourself isn't just "feel-good talk" but a powerful tool for lasting change. The hosts break down practical steps to transform your inner dialogue and explain why self-compassion actually leads to better accountability than harsh self-criticism. Whether you're in recovery or supporting someone who is, this episode offers actionable tools to break free from shame and build lasting resilience. Key Topics The difference between self-compassion and self-excuseResearch evidence supporting self-compassion in recoveryHow shame fuels addiction cyclesPractical steps to develop self-compassionThe role of community support in building self-compassionConnection between self-compassion and accountabilityTools for identifying and transforming your inner critic Key Timestamps [00:01:23] Why we're kinder to others than ourselves [00:03:35] Understanding the trap of self-blame [00:05:02] Introduction to Dr. Kristen Neff's research [00:07:34] Self-compassion vs. making excuses [00:08:23] Practical steps for developing self-compassion [00:11:36] The importance of common humanity [00:14:31] Different timelines for change See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

16 min

20 APR

Episode 380: You’re Not Broken: Moving Beyond “Treatment Resistance” with Noel Rihm and Bill Brady

In this episode of The Addicted Mind, Duane Osterlind talks with Noel Rihm and Bill Brady, founders of Kaleidoscope. Both Noel and Bill spent decades as high-functioning professionals—Noel in healthcare leadership and Bill as a high-powered Wall Street lawyer—while battling severe, life-threatening alcoholism. After years of being labeled "treatment resistant" by traditional rehabs, they discovered that the problem wasn't their lack of willpower; it was that the root cause—unprocessed trauma—had never been addressed. They discuss how EMDR, psychedelic-assisted therapy, and a "bespoke" approach to healing allowed them to move from "white-knuckling" sobriety to living as "unburdened souls." Guests: Noel Rihm A veteran of the healthcare industry for over 25 years, Noel struggled with alcoholism for three decades. Despite cumulative years in residential treatment and AA, she found true liberation through EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), which resolved the trauma symptoms that had driven her addiction for 30 years in just six sessions. Bill Brady Bill spent 25 years in Wall Street finance and private equity. To the outside world, he was "killing it," but internally, he was consuming up to two liters of vodka a day. After traditional treatments failed and hope was gone, Bill found a "miracle" through psychedelic therapy, which allowed him to forgive himself and reconnect with his life. Key Discussion Points 1. The Myth of the "Treatment Resistant" Addict The Problem: Traditional rehab often treats the habit without addressing the pain driving it.The Reality: If treatment isn't working, it is often a failure of the protocol, not the patient. 2. Redefining Trauma The Definition: Trauma is not what happened to you; it is how your nervous system responds to what happened.The "Paper Cut" Effect: Small, recurring "little T" traumas—like a dismissive remark in childhood—can create a false narrative of unworthiness that persists for decades. 3. The Kaleidoscope Model: The Arc of Healing Stabilization: Getting the body and mind regulated.Preparation: Gentle, trauma-informed work to prepare the soul for a shift.The Shift: Utilizing tools like EMDR, psychedelic therapy, or somatic processing to "unhook" from the trauma.Integration: The most critical phase—having a "Sherpa" (permanent coach) to help apply insights to daily life. 4. The "Sherpa" and Family Healing The Sherpa Model: Unlike traditional rehab where the relationship ends at discharge, Kaleidoscope provides a permanent guide to help navigate the "scavenger hunt" of resources in the local community.Healing the System: In the final week of treatment, spouses and significant others are invited to undergo their own healing, ensuring the addict doesn't return to a toxic or unhealed home environment.Memorable Quotes "From the outside, it looked like I was killing it. From the inside, it looked like I was killing myself." — Bill Brady "Unprocessed trauma is like a keg of dynamite waiting to go off. I knew how to address my trauma: Two liters of vodka reliably would get me into a blackout." — Noel Rihm "It’s not about not drinking. It’s about not wanting to." — Bill Brady Resources Mentioned Kaleidoscope:Innovation Lab: Kaleidoscope’s research-driven facility in Cabo, focused on clinical rigor and tracking healing outcomes.Key Therapies: EMDR, Psychedelic-Assisted Therapy, and Somatic Processing. Links to Guests Below: LinkedIn/Noel Rihm LinkedIn/Bill Brady Kaleidoscope Ventures Smashed: Sober (with a Twist) Contact The Addicted Mind: Website: theaddictedmind.com Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast. Supporting Resources: If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center NovusMindfulLife.com We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind Disclaimer See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

38 min

13 APR

Episode 379: Explore the Amazing Work of Virginia Satir with Teresa Mclellan

Welcome back to The Addicted Mind Podcast. This week, we are diving deep into the transformative work of therapy pioneer Virginia Satir. Joining us is Teresa McClellan, a seasoned expert with 18 years of experience across the therapeutic spectrum—working with couples, families, and groups of all kinds. Teresa is currently doing groundbreaking work by applying Satir’s methods within a men’s prison, witnessing firsthand how these "growth-oriented" practices can revolutionize addiction recovery. A Visionary Ahead of Her Time Virginia Satir’s approach was revolutionary, prioritizing human connection long before modern neuroscience caught up to prove why it works. While traditional models often focus on the "pathology" of a person (what’s wrong with them), Satir’s model focuses on growth and the untapped potential within every individual. In this episode, we explore how Satir’s emphasis on the "experiential"—feeling emotions within the body and using imagery—creates a bridge for those in recovery to finally reconnect with their true selves. Episode Highlights The Growth Model vs. Pathology: Why shifting the focus from "the problem" to "the person" changes the recovery trajectory.The Experiential Shift: How the Satir Method moves therapy from a mental exercise to a felt, physical experience.Somatic Recovery: Understanding how emotions are stored in the body and how to fill those "gaps" in the healing process.Satir in the Modern Age: How her decades-old practices align perfectly with our current understanding of brain science and psychology.Recovery Behind Bars: Teresa shares the amazing results of using imagery and experience to help incarcerated men rediscover their humanity. Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast. Supporting Resources: If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery Center NovusMindfulLife.com We want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmind Disclaimer See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

24 min

The Addicted Mind Podcast

TAM+ EP 109 Unlocking Your Inner Optimist: How Your Attention Shapes Your Reality

Episode 383: War Flower: Sobriety, Self-Compassion, and Off-Grid Healing with Robert Stark

Episode 382: Revolutionizing Recovery: Using Data to Speed Up Healing With Nawal Roy

TAM+ EP 108 Breaking Free: Why Shame (Not Guilt) Is Sabotaging Your Recovery

Episode 381: The Neurobiology of Betrayal: Why Trust Shatters and How to Rebuild with Dr. Stan Tatkin

TAM+ EP 107 From Self-Blame to Self-Compassion: Breaking the Addiction Shame Cycle

Episode 380: You’re Not Broken: Moving Beyond “Treatment Resistance” with Noel Rihm and Bill Brady

Episode 379: Explore the Amazing Work of Virginia Satir with Teresa Mclellan

Hosts & Guests

Duane Osterlind

About

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The Addicted Mind Podcast

Episodes

TAM+ EP 109 Unlocking Your Inner Optimist: How Your Attention Shapes Your Reality

Episode 383: War Flower: Sobriety, Self-Compassion, and Off-Grid Healing with Robert Stark

Episode 382: Revolutionizing Recovery: Using Data to Speed Up Healing With Nawal Roy

TAM+ EP 108 Breaking Free: Why Shame (Not Guilt) Is Sabotaging Your Recovery

Episode 381: The Neurobiology of Betrayal: Why Trust Shatters and How to Rebuild with Dr. Stan Tatkin

TAM+ EP 107 From Self-Blame to Self-Compassion: Breaking the Addiction Shame Cycle

Episode 380: You’re Not Broken: Moving Beyond “Treatment Resistance” with Noel Rihm and Bill Brady

Episode 379: Explore the Amazing Work of Virginia Satir with Teresa Mclellan

Hosts & Guests

About

Information

You Might Also Like