Life Uncut Brittany Hockley and Laura Byrne

Hey Lifers!

Welcome back to Ask Uncut where we debate your deepest and darkest dilemmas.First up, we are taking a hot little 2 week break from the podcast! Laura promises to not get any new tattoos...

We're all excited to get some zzzzs.Vibes for the week:

Britt - Fanta & Red Wine Sangria

Laura - The Daily Aus The rise in young women getting labia plasty

Keeshia - Search Engine Why'd I Take Speed For Twenty Years

MY EX HUSBAND IS SEEING MY NEW PARTNER’S EX WIFE

I was married to my ex husband for 8 years, we had two kids together (twins that are 5). The marriage included physical and psychological abuse. After our divorce I met another man, we have currently been together for a year. He is one of a kind, extremely emotionally attentive. A few months after our relationship was public my ex husband matched with his ex wife, and they are now dating. It is a real life wife swap! They also share two children (6 and 3) together so we share four children between the two couples. I can’t help but think my ex husband entered this relationship out of spite and his history of DV is impacting my ability to feel safe in my current relationship as he is that much closer to me. Do I walk away from an amazing relationship in order to distance myself from my ex husband? Or do I remain in the relationship and sit with some of this discomfort?

IS IT RUDE TO LEAVE WEDDING BEFORE BRIDE AND GROOM?

Is it rude to leave a wedding before the bride and groom? I have always thought you shouldn’t leave before the couple. But, recently at a wedding heaps of people were leaving early and now I am wondering if I was wrong or if people have just given up on this notion.

HE DOUBLED DOWN ON WHY HE GHOSTED ME

A guy I was dating for a month ghosted me 2 months ago and I didn’t bother following up because we both kind of knew we didn't like each other enough. (He was really hot though so I wouldn't have minded something casual). Fast forward 2 months to now, he decided to call me randomly out of the blue and when I asked his reason for calling, he said he had been reflecting and felt bad that he ghosted and wanted to formally tell me that he didn't think we were compatible. He then went into the reasons why we wouldn't work out. I don't know what's worse: being ghosted or having a ghost pop back up to tell you why he ghosted?? I had a little hope that he wanted to try dating again but he literally just doubled down on why he thought we wouldn't work out. Any thoughts on what's worse?

HOW TO WIPE YOUR BUM

My friend and I are having a SERIOUS debate… about how to wipe your bum. We’ve settled that we’re both TP folders and not scrunchers, but we wipe our poops SO differently. Please help, do you:


Sit on the toilet, reach underneath between your legs and wipe that way?
Sit on the toilet, reach around the back and wipe from that angle? OR,
Stand up and wipe??

I’m option B, she’s option A and she thinks I’m absolutely crazy for doing so…. Am I? I also occasionally go for option C so I think I’m just fucked up but would love to hear yours and the lifers thoughts. We also settled on wiping from both back to front, or front to back, it just depends on the situation down there…. Is that normal too? Thank you 🤣💩

We mentioned the episodes we previously recorded with Ellie from comfortable in my skin and Jess Hill

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We've had conversations about men's violence against women and domestic violence on this podcast for 5 years, but to say that it's still a huge problem in Australia would be an understatement. Many people feel as though we've been speaking about this for decades. It's time that men were a part of the conversation and the solution. This episode with Tarang should help you have those conversations with the men in your life. 

Tarang Chawla is a keynote speaker, writer, broadcaster, advocate and academic at Monash University. He is also the co-founder of ‘Not One More Niki', an organisation working to end men’s violence against women.Tarang’s younger sister Niki (Nikita) was murdered by her former partner in 2015. She was 23 years old. Tarang has worked tirelessly to educate people about the cultural, political and individual factors that can contribute to men’s violence with the goal of reducing men’s violence.

In our conversation we spoke about:


The patterns of behaviour that lead to violence
Creating a solution focussed conversation with people who say ‘not all men’.
What has changed in the past decade surrounding domestic violence awareness in the public and in government
How men can be the solution
Tarang’s personal opinions on ‘justice’ for murderers
Why media and institutions shape the narrative of who the perpetrators of violence
How we teach boys and girls about their place in the world

You can find more from Tarang's Instagram

You can contribute to Not One More Niki

 

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Hey Lifers,

It's been a HUGE week!Laura got nits, producer Keeshia won a media week award and as you all likely know, BRITT GOT ENGAGED!It's been 5 years of us having the privilege of doing this podcast, sharing all of the best life moments and deeply cooked dating lives, whilst praying to all of the Gods that Britt found her penguin! On today's episode, we take a little trip down memory lane of Britt and Ben's love story and then they answer all of your questions about their engagement and future plans!They speak about:-Whether Britt knew it was happening-How the day panned out-All of the ring details and Ben & Laura's secret messages-What's going to happen once they're married with where they live-Any plans for the wedding

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It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP.

Every week we are joined by our radio co-host Mitch Churi at 3pm on the KIIS Network. You can listen live on iHeart radio, or catch up here each week!For more follow @THEPICKUP on socials.

ON THE SHOW




Mich pisses off a tradie
Talk to your Dad's about their prostates 
Offended at the beautician 
Britt surprises Mitch with her big news
We talk to Ben about the ring
Laura has the stongest feet known to man


See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

OUR BRITTY IS ENGAGED!!!!! 

Today's recording included a HUGE surprise for Laura and Keeshia and we're all crying so you're welcome to too.First up, Laura wants to help her friend know how to avoid catching the feels for her 'friends with benefits' pal.

Vibes for the week:

Britt - Netflix "Geek Girl"Keeshia - Unsubscribing from The Kardashians. Vibing The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck podcast The Harsh Truth About Self Discipline ft Rich RollLaura - Tony's Chocolonely Caramel Sea Salt Milk Chocolate Block

Then we get into your questions and one little surprise:

I WANT TO KEEP THEIR DOG

My friends have a 2.5yr old toddler and a newborn. To help them out, I agreed to look after their puppy for 18 months as they raise their kids as the puppy can be a bit much. I’m currently two months in and realising I did not think this through. The thought of giving him back in a year is really upsetting. The timing of me taking on their dog has come after A) the death of our family dog, and B) I am healing from a toxic relationship so I really needed a little buddy to latch onto and that has been my friend's dog. I also feel like I’m a better home for him as he has my full attention and has made so many friends at my local beach/dog park. The husband is keen on me having him, but the wife is on a very different page and wants the dog back in a year. I genuinely will be heartbroken if I have to give this dog back. How should I approach this with them to convince them that I should keep their dog?

PORN SHOWER

My husband was in the shower and I needed a lil wee so I went in to do that. As I was on the loo I was perving on him in the shower… he looked good, a potential semi, so I decided to strip off and jump in. We had sex in the shower. When we finished I turned to get out and something dropped on the floor. It was his phone. It had been propped up in the shower. So essentially when I had come in to use the bathroom he was watching porn on his phone in the shower and about to have a wank. He was interrupted. I felt weird, like a bit used, as in he was semi hard from watching someone else and then I finished the job. Should I feel weird about this?

And then Britt's own question!

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In the past few weeks, the Netflix show ‘Baby Reindeer’ has been the number 1 TV show in the world. The bio of the show reads “When a struggling comedian shows an act of kindness to a vulnerable woman, it sparks a suffocating obsession which threatens to wreck both their lives.”

This show provided quite a nuanced look at the insidious nature of stalking and a lot of the complex emotions that the victims can experience.

Joining the podcast today is Nicole Madigan. Nicole is a journalist and the author of “Obsession”. Nicole was stalked for over three years. It wreaked havoc on her life and trapped her in a constant state of fear. 

In this chat we speak about:


Nicole’s story and how a stalker infiltrated her life
The emotions experienced by victims of stalking 
Whether Baby Reindeer on Netflix was an accurate representation of what stalking is like
How stalking and harassment isn’t taken seriously in our worlds or by law enforcement
How difficult it is to prove that someone is stalking you and where authorities come into it
The 5 different stalking types
What percentage of perpetrators are men/women and the gender break down of victims
Misconceptions of stalking

You can find more from Nicole hereWe mentioned a previous episode that we recorded with Dr Angela Jay hereYou can watch us on Youtube

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Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xx
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