EARLY ACCESS

Get ad-free, early access episodes!

US$1.99/month

Gay Men Going Deeper

Gay Men's Brotherhood

Gay Men Going Deeper is a weekly podcast that showcases raw and real conversations about personal development, mental health, and sexuality - from an unapologetically gay perspective. Hosted by Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio, and featuring a wide range of special guests, you can expect to be inspired, entertained, and even a little triggered from time to time. This provocative podcast is for anyone who craves deeper conversations on topics ranging from spirituality to sexuality - and everything in between. Visit us at www.GayMenGoingDeeper.com Support the show: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=LT55M79CMH5FN

  1. 15 JAN • EARLY ACCESS EARLY ACCESS

    How to Build Unshakeable Confidence

    This episode of Gay Men Going Deeper is less of a casual conversation and more of a confidence masterclass. One you’ll likely want to come back to again and again. We break down what real, unshakeable confidence actually is (and what it isn’t). Not the loud, performative kind, but the grounded confidence that comes from self-trust, self-compassion, and emotional regulation. We talk honestly about why confidence can feel harder for gay men, how minority stress and shame shape a harsh inner critic, and how we deal with setbacks. In this episode, we cover: - How confidence is built through action, discomfort, self-compassion - How shame and the inner critic quietly undermine self-trust - Whether “fake it till you make it” actually works… and where it falls apart - Why taking action builds confidence (and how inaction erodes it) - How self-compassion keeps confidence intact when things go wrong - What to do when confidence wobbles after rejection, embarrassment, or insecurity If you’ve ever looked confident on the outside but felt shaky on the inside, this episode will help you understand why, and give you a clear, grounded path forward. Save this one. It’s the kind of episode you’ll get something new from every time you listen.

    54 min

  2. 8 JAN • EARLY ACCESS EARLY ACCESS

    Standards vs. Boundaries in Dating

    In this episode, we’re breaking down one of the biggest dating myths gay men love to repeat: “My standards are too high.” But sometimes the problem isn’t what you want, it’s what you allow. We get into the real difference between standards and boundaries, why attraction wipes our memory clean, and how low boundaries quietly reveal your level of self-worth. If you’ve ever said you want emotional maturity but keep entertaining sexy chaos, this episode is going to sting a little (in a good way). Some of the topics we cover in this episode are: - A clear explanation of standards vs boundaries (with examples) - Why our standards collapse the second a hot man gives you attention - How boundaries are actually a self-worth and self-respect practice - The “crumb diet” too many gay men settle for Join us for this honest, relatable, and painfully accurate episode that might be the reset your dating life has been waiting for.

    28 min

  3. 3 DAYS AGO

    Single and Ready to Mingle

    In this episode, Michael and Matt get personal about what we love about being single, how we knew we were ready to start dating again, and what we want to experience differently this time around. We talk about flirting on apps, dating in 2026, and all the messy, exciting parts of putting yourself back out there when you’re ready to mingle.  Some of the topics we cover in this episode are: • Getting back into the dating world • When your nervous system tries to hijack your dating life • Red flags and green flags • What we’re actually looking for in a man now (and how that has changed)  It’s cheeky, honest, and surprisingly insightful. If you’re single (or single-ish), you’ll feel right at home. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio 360° Self-Review for the New Year Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:05) - Gamin Going Deeper: Being Single & Ready To Mingle(00:01:46) - What Is Single and Ready To Mingle?(00:02:27) - What Do You Love About Being Single?(00:05:02) - Mixed Messages on Dating and Singling(00:06:02) - What's Your Favorite Stage Of A Relationship? The Honeymoon Phase(00:10:22) - Matt on Conflicts In His Relationships(00:12:06) - Single People Talk About The Best Things About Being Single(00:16:13) - What I Need In A Good Relationship(00:17:50) - What's The Non-Negotiable Item In A Relationship?(00:20:43) - Gay Men's Brotherhood(00:21:22) - When Are You Ready to Mingle?(00:24:31) - Gay Men on Matching Apps(00:28:26) - "Does It Mean I Attract a Polyamorous Partner?"(00:31:49) - Are You Dating Gay People?(00:33:28) - Gaiman's Going Deep: Relationships and Dating(00:34:25) - What Would You Like To Experience The This Time Around?(00:39:17) - What You Need To Know About Chasing(00:43:10) - What I Want In A Relationship(00:43:52) - Matt on His Sexual Life(00:46:14) - I Should've Knew That My Best Friend Had Sex With Her(00:49:28) - "That's Off-limits" For Gay People(00:49:47) - Gay Men's Brotherhood: Connection Circle

    51 min

  4. 25/12/2025

    When Attraction Fades

    Why does attraction fade- and what can we do about it?  In this episode, we get real about attraction in long-term relationships. The spark doesn’t always burn forever, and losing sexual interest doesn’t mean the relationship is doomed. We talk about why attraction naturally shifts over time and how couples can ignite intimacy. We explore: Why attraction fades in relationships The 4 types of intimacy (and why they matter) Sexless marriages and normalizing libido changes What erodes desire over time How to bring spark, novelty, and connection back Join us for a real conversation on attraction, intimacy, and what keeps the spark alive over time. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - When Attraction Fades in Gay Relationships(00:04:24) - 4 Types of Intimate Relationship(00:10:11) - How To Keep The Fire In Your Relationships(00:15:06) - What Causes Attraction To Fizzle For You(00:18:01) - How to Keep the Sex Fire Alive in Your Marriage(00:21:21) - 3 Tips For Keeping Intimate Relationships Alive(00:23:47) - Gay Men's Brotherhood: Sparking Your Love Life

    25 min

  5. 18/12/2025

    What’s Really Sexy (and Nobody Talks About It)

    After unpacking our culture’s obsession with “perfect” bodies, this week we’re flipping the script. In this episode, we’re celebrating what’s actually hot: the things that don’t get enough love in the gay world. We’re talking dad bods, wrinkles, kindness, confidence, awkward charm, conversational skills, and all the real stuff that makes someone magnetic.  Some of the things we’re talking about: How social media perpetuates social norms that don’t fit  The traits we find sexy that don’t get enough love  Stories of when we’ve fallen for people outside our type  The roles of dating apps in attraction and rejection How our types have changed (and how they haven’t) This is our love letter to all the guys out there who feel they aren’t sexy because they don’t fit the mold. It’s time to expand our definition of sexy and give some overdue appreciation where it’s due. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deep: What's Really Sexy?(00:01:15) - How To Survive A Culture of Body Perfection(00:03:42) - The Real Sexy, Unmarketed(00:04:42) - Celebrating What's Real(00:05:09) - What Is Something That You Think Is Sexy About Your Guy?(00:06:02) - 5 Things That Make A Guy Sexy(00:08:03) - What's The Sexiest Walk?(00:08:55) - Michael's Signature Walk(00:09:45) - Alexandra On Being Hot For Quirkies(00:12:44) - People Compare Their Feet To Hands(00:14:58) - What's The Non Physical Attraction Of Gay People?(00:18:37) - Dad Bods and Big Nose(00:21:23) - Oh, Lisps and Accents(00:21:58) - Connection Circle(00:22:58) - My Types Are Different(00:27:06) - I Should've Swiped On Grindr Instead Of Dating(00:31:10) - Are You My Type?(00:34:44) - Matt Reno And Chris Hemsworth On Being Unorthodox(00:37:34) - Michael Jackson On His Hotness(00:39:37) - Thank You!!!

    41 min

  6. 11/12/2025

    How to Thrive in the Culture of Body Perfection

    From the gym to social media, gay men are constantly surrounded by images of the “ideal” body. But what does all this perfection chasing actually cost us? In this episode, we explore how body perfection culture impacts gay men on a deeper level: from belonging and self-worth to intimacy and identity. We open up about our own journeys with body image— how we’ve moved from obsession to acceptance, where it still sneaks in today, and what we’ve learned along the way. You’ll hear us unpack: Why body image matters more for gay men How fitness and self-worth often get mixed up The difference between caring for your body and obsessing over it How to stop letting your reflection decide your mood Practical ways to reclaim confidence and self-respect If you’ve ever felt like a “perfect” body will earn you love, attention, or belonging, this one’s for you. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gaiman Going Deep: The Culture of Body Perfection(00:01:52) - How to Love Your Body (Without Perfection)(00:05:50) - Does the Culture of Body Perfection Impact You?(00:09:07) - The Help I Learned To Love My Body(00:13:40) - What Do You Think You Need To Look To Be Attractive?(00:16:08) - November 6: The Culture of Body Perfection(00:16:55) - Letting Go Of Body Perfection(00:22:08) - "Self-worth is not solely based on your body"(00:24:42) - Body Positivity(00:26:33) - What Have We Done To Mitigate Body Perfection Culture?(00:30:41) - What Have I Done To Prevent Body Perfection Pressure?(00:35:43) - Neil Gaiman on The Gay Brotherhood(00:36:53) - The Hard Work of Being Gay(00:37:30) - Gay People Go To the Gym(00:41:27) - Gay culture's need for belonging(00:43:13) - Gay Men's Brotherhood Podcast

    44 min

  7. 04/12/2025

    Radical Honesty: Letting Yourself Be Known

    In this episode, we dive into what radical honesty really means- not the brutally blunt “telling it like it is” version, but the deeper, more vulnerable kind that lets you actually be known. We explore why being honest is both terrifying and liberating, the subtle ways we still avoid it, and how honesty differs from harsh truth-telling. We share our own struggles with showing up honestly in dating, friendships, and community, and why the outcome isn’t always pretty… but is always worth it. If honesty is one of your personal values (or you want it to be)  this episode will give you plenty to reflect on. And if you’re enjoying these more relaxed, conversational episodes, let us know. We’ve been loving creating them. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Game & Going Deeper: The Gaiman Brothers Podcast(00:00:26) - What is Radical HONOR?(00:04:35) - Being Candid With My Partner(00:06:25) - How To Talk About Jealousy In Relationships(00:10:04) - Radical honesty can be a beautiful tool to heal intimacy(00:14:36) - Radical Alignment: The Benefits of Real Love(00:20:06) - Radical Honesty and the Relationship(00:22:38) - What are some other things that you need to practice radical honesty in(00:27:51) - Slices With Matt Maher(00:28:20) - What's Hard for You to Share?

    29 min

  8. 27/11/2025

    Twinks, Jocks, and Bears, Oh My! The Obsession with Gay Labels

    Today we’re diving into one of the most iconic (and hilarious) parts of gay culture: labels. In this episode, we unpack why gay men are so obsessed with categories like “twink,” “daddy,” “masc,” “otter,” “guy next door,” and every micro-label in between… and how these identities shape the way we date, belong, and see ourselves. We explore: Why labels can feel empowering (and sometimes limiting) How they create tribe, shorthand, and community When they become boxes we get stuck in How attraction, identity, and insecurity get wrapped into these roles What happens when you “grow out” of a label or never fit one at all It’s a fun, honest look at the ways we use labels to navigate gay life:  where they help, where they fall short, and why they matter more than most of us want to admit. If you enjoy these more conversational episodes, let us know… we’re trying something new. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deep: A Short Talk(00:01:02) - What Gay Labels Do You Use?(00:05:21) - Gay People Don't Like Labels(00:08:40) - In the Gay Community's Elite Communities(00:11:56) - Gay Men Let Go Of Their Identities(00:17:07) - The Negative Connotations of Labels(00:21:34) - Gay People Play With Their Identities(00:24:54) - Spontaneous Conversation With The Gaiman's Brotherhood

    26 min
See All (276)

About

Gay Men Going Deeper is a weekly podcast that showcases raw and real conversations about personal development, mental health, and sexuality - from an unapologetically gay perspective. Hosted by Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio, and featuring a wide range of special guests, you can expect to be inspired, entertained, and even a little triggered from time to time. This provocative podcast is for anyone who craves deeper conversations on topics ranging from spirituality to sexuality - and everything in between. Visit us at www.GayMenGoingDeeper.com Support the show: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=LT55M79CMH5FN

Information

You Might Also Like