Immersion

Pamela Carey
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A search for how to live a meaningful life in the modern world. Exploring psychology, philosophy, and the world around us. Let’s dive 30 minutes beneath the surface each Sunday together. | Hosted by Pamela Carey Leave a voice message for the show here: https://www.speakpipe.com/pamelacarey Write in here: https://www.pamcarey.com/contact This podcast is a production of Bounding Husky LLC doing business as Pamela Carey Enterprises Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional or licensed psychologist

  1. 15 MAR

    Relationship Science 101: Why "Minding" is the Secret to Lasting Relationships

    How do we build relationships that actually flourish? In Part 8 of our Positive Psychology series, we’re looking at the science of staying connected through Minding and Active Construction. Whether it’s with friends, family, or partners, we’re moving beyond the honeymoon phase and looking at the intentional work of relating to one another. A large part of this episode is dedicated to the concept of Minding—the ongoing process of knowing and being known by others. We explore how being intentional and curious about the people in our lives can transform the way we relate to one another. Also in this episode: Capitalization in Real Life: I’m joined by a close friend who is naturally incredible at "Active Constructive Responding." We talk about what it actually looks like to show up for someone when things are going right.The Gottman Basics: We touch on "Bids for Affection" and the Magic Ratio—simple but powerful tools for understanding the emotional bank account in any relationship.Self-Expansion & Novelty: A brief look at why doing new things together helps us grow individually and as a pair.The 3 Ingredients for Friendship: What actually makes a friendship stick? I'm sharing some simple takeaways from a positive psychology class that changed how I look at my own social circle.A Systems Perspective: We listen to a voicemail that helps us visualize how our relationships aren't just one-on-one, but part of a larger ecosystem.This series is all about finding practical ways to apply the science of well-being to our daily lives. I’m glad you’re here for the home stretch! References & Further Reading - The Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology (2nd Ed.): Edited by Dr. Shane J. Lopez and Dr. C. R. Snyder. - The "Minding" Model: Based on research by Dr. John H. Harvey and Dr. Julia Omarzu. - Bids for Affection & Magic Ratios: Developed by Dr. John Gottman (and the clinical work of Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman) - Gender Differences in Self-Disclosure: Based on the classic meta-analysis by Dr. Kathryn Dindia and Dr. Mike Allen (1992). While earlier research suggested women disclose more in general, newer studies (like Carbone & Loewenstein, 2023) suggest that while men and women share positive news at similar rates, women may be more likely to share negative news or vulnerabilities. - Active Constructive Responding (Capitalization): Research by Dr. Shelly Gable and colleagues. - Self-Expansion Theory: Dr. Arthur Aron and Dr. Elaine Aron. - The 3 Ingredients for Friendship: Insights from a course taught by Dr. Ryan Duffy at the University of Florida. - Systems Theory Segment: Special thanks to Lea for the voicemail! You can find more of her work at https://accountabilitycoachinglondon.co.uk/. - Guest Interview: A huge thank you to Madeline for joining me to talk about being an active constructive responder! Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    40 min

  2. 8 MAR

    Does Success Lead to Happiness – OR Does Happiness Lead to Success? (Part 7 in Positive Psychology Deep Dive)

    We are 7 episodes into this series and I have a confession: I expected to feel "happier" by now, but the reality of positive psychology is a lot more nuanced. While I’ve definitely picked up some great habits around Grit and finding Flow in my work, I was surprised to find that the best parts of my day weren't the big achievements—they were the simple things, like a cup of tea and a good book before bed. In this episode, we’re finally tackling the "P" in PERMA+ (Positive Feeling States). In this conversation, we’re breaking down: Flourishing vs. Happy: Why positive psychology is actually about well-being as a whole, rather than just chasing a mood.The "Magic Pill": What actually gets us closest to a sustainable sense of happiness?The Success Paradox: We always hear that success leads to happiness, but does it actually work the other way around?The 10 Positive Emotions: A look at the ten most cited emotions in the field Achievement vs. Feeling: How things like Mastery and Grit connect back to our day-to-day emotional states.We also dive into Dr. Barbara Fredrickson’s "Broaden and Build" theory. It’s a foundational concept that explains how these small, positive moments actually help us build the resources we need to handle the hard stuff.  We’ll also continue our ongoing debate: Hedonic happiness (pleasure) vs. Eudaemonic happiness (meaning).  If you’ve ever felt like you’re "doing the work" but still just want to enjoy the small stuff, this episode is for you. Resources and researchers mentioned in this episode  Cited throughout this series - Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology 2nd Edition - by  C. R. Snyder  Shane J. Lopez  (Editor)Dr. Iris Mauss -  on seeking happiness leading to less happiness Dr. Ryan Duffy - Positive psychology professor at UF - referenced in the part on gratitude (What I said after that is my own thoughts though and I cannot speak for his views on that) Dr. Barbara Fredrickson for Broaden and Build theory - https://royalsocietypublishing.org/rstb/article-abstract/359/1449/1367/20449/The-broaden-and-build-theory-of-positive-emotions?redirectedFrom=fulltext Ask Polly - on savoring paradox Character strengths mentioned in the episode: https://www.viacharacter.orgLeave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    30 min

  3. 15 FEB

    How to Master Any Skill Faster (It’s Not 10,000 Hours)

    Is the 10,000-hour rule a myth? We’ve all heard that it takes 10,000 hours to master a craft, but the truth is that not all hours are created equal. In this episode, we dive into the science of peak performance and the current "Gold Standard" of learning: Deliberate Practice. Based on the research of Dr. K. Anders Ericsson, we break down why simply "putting in more time" isn't enough and how you can greatly enhance your learning curve to improve in your field. In this episode, we discuss: ▶️ Purposeful vs. Deliberate Practice: Why your current routine might be plateauing and how to fix it. ▶️ The PERMA+ Model: How mastery and achievement fuel long-term happiness and positive psychology. ▶️ Case Studies in Excellence: From the undercover bravery of journalist Nellie Bly to the joy Indiana found in playing the Sugar Plum Fairy in the Nutcracker ▶️ Actionable Steps: How to apply the principles of deliberate practice to your daily life immediately. Timestamps:  00:00 Deliberate Practice: The Basics 02:50 The 10,000-Hour Rule: Separating Fact from Myth 06:30 Why is Deliberate Practice So Difficult? 09:19 Tips to Apply Deliberate Practice in Daily Life 18:45 Mastery, Positive Psychology, and the PERMA+ Model 29:42 Podcast Updates  Up next:  - Our series on positive psychology: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLPJBR0a3Yz6u9jXWk1uknsVSq-XVGMMXI - Mastery prior episode on breaking through sticking points: https://youtu.be/sXwhvqoeWxk - On perfectionism: YouTube version: https://youtu.be/vNB2x1ULLec or the podcast version here https://www.buzzsprout.com/2318937/episodes/16439411 - On grit and optimism: https://youtu.be/puZoiXL_NIQ or podcast version here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2318937/episodes/18565769 Resources mentioned 📖  - Deliberate practice: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18778378/ - Case study with the dancer Indiana: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fa-I7iUErK0 - Article on Perma and savoring achievements: https://www.thepositivepsychologypeople.com/perma-a-is-for-accomplishmentachievement/  - The good life podcast interview with K. Anders Ericsson, PhD - https://www.goodlifeproject.com/podcast/anders-ericsson/ Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    31 min

  4. 8 FEB

    Flow State: Why Getting "In the Zone" is a Secret to Happiness & High Performance

    What if you could disappear into your tasks and emerge happier, more productive, and less stressed? That "magical" feeling - one you have likely experienced from time to time - is called Flow. And it’s more than just a catchy term thrown around these days; it’s a scientifically backed state of peak performance. In this video, we dive into the groundbreaking research of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and Jeanne Nakamura to uncover why "losing yourself" in a task is one of the 9 key tools for creating a meaningful life.  (This is part 5 of our series on positive psychology which goes into all 9 of these tools - and you can find more about these tools in the episodes directly before and after this one!)  In this video, you’ll learn: The 3 criteria and 6 characteristics that define a true Flow State.Why engagement increases life satisfactionPractical strategies to trigger immersion in your daily routine. Timestamp Chapters: 00:00 Intro & Example of Flow 04:20 The 3 Criteria & 6 Characteristics of Flow 10:56 The Historical Lens 13:27 What qualifies as Flow? (Common Questions)  16:52 The Happiness Connection: Why Flow feels so good  24:09 Actionable Steps: How to create more Flow today Resources mentioned: 📖  - Textbook: https://academic.oup.com/edited-volume/28153 - Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    35 min

  5. 1 FEB

    How Habits for Health and Vitality Impact Happiness (Positive Psychology Series Part 4)

    How do exercise, sleep, and nutrition actually impact our mood and mental health? You have likely felt the difference between weeks when you are caring for your body versus weeks when those habits fall away. Sometimes, we need to consciously recognize how much better we feel - physically and emotionally - before those healthy habits finally stick. In Part 4 of our Positive Psychology series, we are covering the "Plus" in the PERMA+ model. We’re diving into the science of what happens inside the body and how physical health acts as a pillar for mental well-being. In this episode, we cover: Can there be such a thing as "constructive" stress?Why does gut health matter so much for mood?Practical tips for managing your circadian rhythm. 🔗 Resources Mentioned: • Caffeine video: https://youtu.be/3FKknOHI_-Q • Arthur C. Brooks doing happiness FAQ on WIRED https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTmixSgeOI0 • Nutritional Psychiatry: https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/nutritional-psychiatry-your-brain-on-food-201511168626 • Research article on mood and sleep: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4318605/ • Hydration research: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3984246/ • https://lonestarneurology.net/others/how-sugar-spikes-and-crashes-influence-brain-chemistry/ • https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/in-depth/depression-and-exercise/art-20046495 My book Fit Intuition: https://www.amazon.com/Fit-Intuition-Listen-Never-Again/dp/1735920509#averageCustomerReviewsAnchor Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    35 min

  6. 25 JAN

    Grit, Resilience, and Optimism: How to not quit when things get hard

    Ever feel like you have the talent, but you just can't seem to finish what you start? In this episode, we’re looking at why we "hit the wall" and quit when things get difficult. It’s a dive into the science of Grit, Resilience, and Hope - tools that many believe we are born with, but research proves we can actually build. Using the foundational work of Martin Seligman, Carol Dweck, and Angela Duckworth, we explore the shift from "Learned Helplessness" to "Learned Optimism." This is Part 3 of our series on Happiness and Positive Psychology, focusing on the psychological mechanics of achieving your goals and staying the course. What we cover in this deep dive: How to identify your "Explanatory Style" (The story you tell yourself about failure).The difference between a Growth Mindset and a Fixed Mindset.Why "Hope" isn't just a feeling, but a cognitive skill you can trainSome takeaways from the book Grit Resources: 📖  Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance: https://angeladuckworth.com/grit-book/Growth mindset article: https://stanfordmag.org/contents/why-mindset-mattersRainbows in the mind (Hope theory) https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2003-01827-001Good to Great article excerpt: https://www.jimcollins.com/concepts/Stockdale-Concept.html and Optimism and long term outcomes for POW after returning home: https://psycnet.apa.org/buy/2014-37465-001Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    38 min

  7. 18 JAN

    Your Brain Has an Immune System for Sadness: & How to strengthen it

    Why do we recover from heartbreaks, job losses, and injuries faster than we could ever imagine? For example, if you were fired today or left at the altar, how long would you be miserable? You probably guess "months or years." But the science suggests this is not necessarily the case.  We often underestimate our ability to heal because we don't realize we have a Psychological Immune System. Just like your body fights infection with a physical immune system, your brain has a built-in mechanism to metabolize grief, reject despair, and return you to baseline happiness much faster than you predict. But unlike your physical immune system, you have to know how to trigger it for it to work most effectively. In this episode, we are looking under the hood of the Psychological Immune System. We explore not just what it is, but how to actively strengthen it so you can fear failure and setbacks less. We also cover:  The Components: The mix of conscious actions (soothing) and unconscious edits (memory) that heal us.The "Rose-Tinted" Effect: How our memory edits the past to protect our future.Irreversibility: Why burning your boats might actually make you happier than keeping your options open. Synthetic Happiness vs. Natural Happiness: Is one really better than the other?  Cognitive reframes: including CBT and The Work of Byron Katie And the many psychological factors as play such as locus of control and impact bias  Prior episodes mentioned:  On Reversible and Irreversible Decisions and Commitment: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2318937/episodes/18391487 Part 1 in Happiness Series: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2318937/episodes/18486848 Resources 📖  -        Stumbling on Happiness by Dan Gilbert (the book referenced) and here is his TED talk https://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_the_surprising_science_of_happiness -The Work by Byron Katie https://thework.com/2017/10/four-liberating-questions/ -Article mentioned: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dating-and-mating/202004/don-t-underestimate-your-psychological-immune-system -https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2005-09663-004 -https://thebtrc.com/understanding-the-psychological-immune-system-and-its-role-in-trauma-recovery/ -On moving from negative to neutral and how we can implement the immune system to take more risks: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2023/aug/14/the-psychological-immune-system-four-ways-to-bolster-yours-and-have-a-happier-calmer-life - On Defense Mechanisms: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/defense-mechanisms Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    32 min

  8. 11 JAN

    The Happiness Equation: Genetics vs. What You Control (Part 1 in Positive Psychology Deep Dive)

    We spend our whole lives chasing happiness, but we rarely stop to ask: Are we chasing the right things? Or more importantly - do we even have control over how happy we are? Research suggests that while a portion of our happiness is genetic, a significant amount is firmly within our control - if we know which levers to pull.  In this episode, we dive into the science of building a happier life. We look at why our brains are notoriously bad at predicting the future (affective forecasting) and how to stop stumbling into happiness and start designing it. In this episode, we cover: The 50% Rule: Is happiness genetic, or is it a choice?The Prediction Trap: Why we are bad at guessing what will make us happy (Affective Forecasting).Hedonic vs. Eudaimonic: The difference between "feeling good" and "deeper meaning"The PERMA+ Model: The scientific "ingredients" list for a good life.Surrogation: A strategy for making better major life decisions.The Toolkit: How to use Positive Psychology to move the needle on your satisfaction (as the first part of an upcoming series) Reference: The "Happiness Pie Chart" discussed in this episode is based on the work of Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ken Sheldon, and David Schkade Other resources mentioned: 📕  Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert Character strengths: https://www.viacharacter.org/Affective forecasting by Timothy Wilson and Daniel GilbertDoes more money make us happier? NOTE upon looking at this closer, I saw they went into some additional nuances not covered in the video - worth a read if you are curious https://penntoday.upenn.edu/news/does-more-money-correlate-greater-happiness-Penn-Princeton-researchOn the long-running happiness study: https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/Some more on Perma: https://ppc.sas.upenn.edu/learn-more/perma-theory-well-being-and-perma-workshopsSome more basics on positive psychology: as referenced from Peterson 2008 https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-good-life/200805/what-is-positive-psychology-and-what-is-it-not and  https://positivepsychology.com/what-is-positive-psychology-definition/My positive psychology professor from university: https://www.drryanduffy.com/ Timestamps:  00:00 Intro: Stumbling on happiness  02:28 How is happiness actually defined?  04:17 How controllable is happiness?  07:24 Affective Forecasting: Your mind lies to you  09:16 PERMA+: The ingredients of the good life  15:35 "Surrogation": A tool for better decision making  18:21 The field of Positive Psychology & Footnotes Leave a voice message here Newsletter sign up YouTube - channel

    23 min
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A search for how to live a meaningful life in the modern world. Exploring psychology, philosophy, and the world around us. Let’s dive 30 minutes beneath the surface each Sunday together. | Hosted by Pamela Carey Leave a voice message for the show here: https://www.speakpipe.com/pamelacarey Write in here: https://www.pamcarey.com/contact This podcast is a production of Bounding Husky LLC doing business as Pamela Carey Enterprises Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional or licensed psychologist

Information

  • Creator
    Pamela Carey
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    38
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Bounding Husky LLC doing business as Pamela Carey Enterprises
  • Show Website
    Immersion