Securely Attached

Dr. Sarah Bren

Securely Attached is your go-to parenting podcast, supporting moms and dads from pregnancy all the way through their child's adolescence and every stage in between. Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship. And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We're answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the "rules." From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parent—this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust. About Sarah Bren, PhD Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.

  1. 9 HR AGO

    Q&A: How can I teach my sensitive child to cope with teasing?

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...   - Why some children are more sensitive to teasing, how temperament plays a role, and why those kids are often more likely to be targeted by peers. - How all three hosts, as therapists and parents of sensitive boys, handle teasing and social stress with their own children, including what has helped and what we had to learn the hard way. - What kids mean when they talk about "rage baiting," how this behavior shows up in friendships, and why it is especially dysregulating for sensitive children. - Whether a "toughen up" approach ever helps sensitive kids, and what Dr. Sarah learned when her husband's advice to their son worked better than her own. - How children can learn coping skills for teasing, including when to walk away, when it might be okay to engage, and how to tell the difference.   If your child takes teasing to heart and you worry about how to help without minimizing their feelings, this episode will help you support your sensitive child with more confidence, clarity, and connection.     REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:   👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.     CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping "Big Reactors" learn to regulate and manage their intense emotions with Claire Lerner   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about raising sensitive, "spicy," or highly emotional children   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating peer rejection in early adolescence     WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:   Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

    29 min
  2. 2 DAYS AGO

    Reclaiming your focus: Distraction, screen time, and becoming more present with Nir Eyal

    Author of Indistractable, Nir Eyal, is here to reshape the way we think about attention, willpower, and the forces that pull our minds in a thousand different directions.   Together we explore:   - The surprising science showing that internal triggers (not technology) drive most of our daily distractions. - How stress, boredom, overwhelm, and discomfort quietly shape our habits (and our kids'). - Nir's simple 4-step framework for becoming "indistractable." - What parents can do to model healthy tech habits without constant nagging, power struggles, or guilt. - How to help kids build executive functioning skills like focus, follow-through, and frustration tolerance. - A scheduling hack families can use to reduce battles and increase connection. - The small mindset shifts that turn everyday moments of distraction into opportunities for growth.   If you've ever found yourself checking your phone without thinking, losing time to endless tasks, struggling to stay present with your child, or worrying about how screens are affecting your family, this episode offers clarity, practical tools, and a completely new way to approach focus and intentionality — for both you and your kids.     LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Nir Eyal  📚 Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life 📚 Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products   FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱X: @nireyal & LinkedIn: Nir Eyal  📱IG: @drsarahbren    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 👉🏻 Are you interested in exploring executive functioning supports? At Upshur Bren Psychology Group we offer a wide range of options, including in-person services for kids who live locally and virtual coaching support for those nationally. SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs.     CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about teaching kids healthy tech habits free of guilt or power struggles with Ash Brandin   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best response to kids who constantly say, "I'm bored"?

    59 min
  3. 1 JAN

    Q&A: Is it normal for my toddler to want to wear the same outfit every day?

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...   - Why toddlers often get intensely attached to a single outfit and why this kind of rigidity is usually a totally normal part of development. - How to understand the difference between a sensory preference, a sensory processing challenge, and everyday toddler stubbornness. - What "system load" is and why kids become more rigid when they are navigating stress, transitions, or big developmental leaps. - How to reduce morning battles by planning ahead, building flexibility skills, and getting curious about what is really driving your child's resistance. - What to do on the days when nothing works, including how to ride out meltdowns with less guilt and more grounded presence.   If you are struggling with daily clothing standoffs or wondering whether your child's rigidity means something is wrong, this episode will help you make sense of what is developmentally typical, when to consider sensory support, and how to navigate tough moments with more confidence and clarity.     REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:   💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.   CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about understanding your toddler with Devon Kuntzman 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on how to mindfully parent a threenager 🎧 Listen to my podcast on understanding your child's sensory processing experiences with The OT Butterfly Laura Petix 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on strengthening your child's distress tolerance     WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:   Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

    26 min
  4. 30/12/2025

    Mom guilt, good guilt, and letting go: How to tell when guilt is helping you (and when it's holding you back) with Dr. Saumya Dave

    Dr. Saumya Dave, psychiatrist, mental health advocate, and author of the new novel The Guilt Pill, joins me this week for a conversation about the emotional load so many mothers carry that can shape our choices, our identity, and even how we see ourselves as parents.   Together we explore:   - The surprising truth that guilt isn't always bad and how to recognize when it's actually trying to tell you something important. - How cultural expectations and "good girl" conditioning quietly shape the way mothers judge themselves, often without realizing it. - What happens when we try to shut off difficult emotions, and why numbing guilt can create more challenges than it solves. - Why Dr. Saumya chose fiction to explore the emotional undercurrents of motherhood and how storytelling reveals truths we rarely say out loud. - What kids learn from the way we relate to guilt and how parents can model a healthier, more grounded approach. - Small shifts that can loosen guilt's grip and help you reconnect with the messy, joyful moments right in front of you.   If you've ever felt weighed down by the pressure to be a "perfect" parent, struggled with the inner critic that tells you you're not doing enough, or simply want a deeper understanding of where mom guilt comes from and how to soften its impact, this episode will give you clarity, validation, and tools to support your emotional wellbeing.     LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗 Saumya Dave  📚 The Guilt Pill: A Psychological Thriller of Motherhood and Ambition     FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@saumyajdave  📱@drsarahbren   ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:   🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs.   📚 To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma     CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode fighting against the pressure to be perfect with Gayane Aramyan   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether one mom's guilt over being a working mom is hurting her parenting   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how mentally strong people handle life's up's and downs with Amy Morin

    38 min
  5. 25/12/2025

    Q&A: I'm worried no one will come to my child's birthday party. What do I do?

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...   - Why the fear that no one will come to your child's birthday party feels so intense for parents and why that reaction is rooted in real neuroscience. - Ways to ground yourself so you can support your child with clarity instead of panic. - Strategies for planning a birthday celebration that feels safe, joyful, and truly right for your child, whether that means a small gathering, a special outing, or something completely different. - How to partner with teachers, other parents, and your community to help your child form more meaningful connections. - What to do if disappointment still happens and how to validate your child's feelings without getting stuck in them.   If you are worried about your child feeling left out, this episode will help you navigate those moments with more confidence so you can show up with grounded support and help your child feel understood and connected.     REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES: 🎧 Why birthdays are so hard for your kid and what parents can do about it 🎧 Listen to my podcast interview with Dr. Yael Schonbrun  👉🏻Why the brain registers the pain of social rejection the same way as physical pain      CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle peer rejection in toddlerhood 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about peer rejection in early adolescence  🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering secure attachment in peer relationships with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore     WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:   Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

    18 min
  6. 23/12/2025

    Is America's achievement culture fueling a mental health crisis in our kids? With Dr. Doug Bolton

    Clinical psychologist, educational leader, and author of Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation, Dr. Doug Bolton, joins me this week to unpack the rising levels of anxiety, burnout, and overwhelm we're seeing in kids today.   Together we explore:   - How changes in education starting in the 90s have intensified academic pressure for kids of all ages. - Why school avoidance, perfectionism, and burnout are rising, even among high-achieving students. - The neuroscience behind why rigor, overscheduling, and constant output make it harder for kids to access curiosity, regulation, and real learning. - How expectations have shifted, and why many kids simply aren't developmentally ready for what schools now demand. - Realistic, achievable ways to build rest, connection, and resilience into daily family life. - Small shifts parents can make at home to buffer their child's stress, protect their mental health, and restore balance.   If your child is melting down after school, anxious about grades, overwhelmed by homework, or feeling weighed down by pressure to perform, this episode will help you understand what's really going on beneath the surface and give you practical tools to support their wellbeing.     LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Dr. Doug Bolton  📚Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools, and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation    FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: 📱@douglasabolton  📱@drsarahbren   ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 If your child is feeling overwhelmed by school demands, struggling with executive functioning, or showing signs of anxiety or burnout, you don't have to navigate this alone. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about our therapy and coaching services designed to help kids and families move through these challenges with clarity and support.   CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the dangers of an achievement centric approach with Jennifer Breheny Wallace   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child feel less academic pressure   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle school refusal    🎧 Listen to podcast episode about the myths of learning styles with Dr. Dan Willingham   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the neuroscience of why boys and girls need different things with Michael Gurian

    59 min
  7. 18/12/2025

    Q&A: How do I get my 3-year-old to stop crying over everything?

    Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...   - What is actually happening when your toddler cries over every little thing, from dropped toys to leaving the playground. - Why saying "don't cry" often backfires, and what actually helps shorten the crying instead. - The simple validation strategy that calms big feelings faster, even when every part of you wants the tears to stop. - How to model emotional regulation by moving forward without ignoring your child or shutting their feelings down. - When to offer empathy, when to add a little distraction (and why the order you do this really matters!) for helping toddlers build resilience.   If your child seems to dissolve into tears at the smallest frustration, this episode will help you understand the developmental reasons behind all that emotion and give you practical, real-world tools for supporting their feelings while still keeping your day moving.     REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:   👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages!     CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:   🎧Listen to my podcast episode about helping parents decipher whether you have a child who is anxious or just sensitive 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about understanding toddlerhood with Devon Kuntzman 🎧Listen to my podcast episode about supporting your toddler's sleep with Eileen Henry     WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:   Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

    16 min
  8. 16/12/2025

    Settling your unsettled baby: How to read your child's cues, build routines, and trust your instincts with pediatrician Dr. Golly

    Pediatrician and bestselling author Dr. Golly (aka Dr. Daniel Golshevsky) joins me this week to help new parents make sense of the early weeks with a newborn and feel more grounded, confident, and connected along the way.   Together we explore:   - How to understand newborn behavior and cues so you can respond with more confidence. - What really matters in the first four weeks — and what you can let go of. - Why some babies struggle to settle, and how to support their developing nervous system. - How to create flexible, supportive routines without slipping into rigidity or pressure. - The powerful role of partners and non-breastfeeding caregivers in bonding and soothing. - How parents can tune out the noise, trust their instincts, and feel less overwhelmed by conflicting advice.   Whether you're navigating confusing cues, unpredictable sleep, feeding challenges, colic, or the general overwhelm of early parenthood, this episode offers clarity and reassurance during one of the most intense transitions of your life.     LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST: 🔗Learn more about Dr. Golly and use code securelyattachedVIP15 for 15% off all Dr Golly courses at www.drgolly.com 🔗Get Dr. Golly's free Sleeping Tips checklists 📚Your Baby Doesn't Come with a Book: Dr Golly's Guide to the First Four Weeks of Parenthood  📚Dr Golly's Guide to Family Illness: Sneezes, Wheezes and Common Diseases   📚Our Baby, Our Baby, What Do You Need?: A Dr Golly Lift-the-Flap book  📚Our Baby, Our Baby, What Did You Say?: A Dr Golly Lift-the-Flap book      FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: 📱@drgolly  📱@drsarahbren   ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES: 🔗 Go to drsarahbren.com/secure to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.   WANT TO TAKE YOUR LEARNING EVEN FURTHER? Join me in The Authentic Parent, my comprehensive self-paced course that takes my workshop to the next level and teaches you everything you need to know (that no one tells you ahead of time) for how to confidently move through your first year of parenthood.     CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE: 🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about lightening the load in pregnancy and parenthood with Dr. Sterling   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with a realistic look at postpartum and early parenthood with Dr. Jessica Vernon   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about movement in pregnancy and postpartum with Dr. Megan Roche   🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how "mom-brain" can be our greatest strength with Dr. Nicole Pensak

    53 min

About

Securely Attached is your go-to parenting podcast, supporting moms and dads from pregnancy all the way through their child's adolescence and every stage in between. Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship. And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We're answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the "rules." From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parent—this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust. About Sarah Bren, PhD Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.

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