Birth Moms Real Talk D. Yvonne Rivers

Shanae remembers the age of 9 and 1/2 so vividly. This time in her life was very challenging and brought forth many traumas that disrupted her life. This life-changing moment gave way to her ‘gift’ of writing her feelings in a journal. This was her “ coping” method. Shanae faced doubts of her ‘ truth’ by the adults in her circle.
As an expectant mother, she faced challenges and vulnerabilities in her life. She faced the flop - flop of support from family. Many perceptions of adoption were from what she watched on “ TV’. She is focused on healing herself and her son. Shanae’s message to birthmothers is “ You Belong Here”

Cindy shares her experience of being a 15-year-old birth mom living in the Midwest. Cindy had a ‘ different family situation “ as she describes her life. 
Cindy had a sibling with autism which translated into her being a caregiver.
Family legacy was missing from both her mom's and dad's families. Cindy says she grew up on “ an island”.
Her journey took her through many different scenarios with parental support.
Cindy faced her fears of finding her son.

Cathryn grew up in a very strict family. Her religious background shaped her youth. She described herself as a ‘ rule follower”. She felt she was “ in the way” in the home growing up.
Cathryn had unconscious memories about giving birth to her daughter. Cathryn experienced PTSD while in therapy which prompted her to search for her daughter.

Donna grew up in a home of “Fear and Unknowns”. She faced the traumatic experience of molestation. Donna became a birth mother at the age of 13.
Donna’s siblings escaped all the family shame, remorse, and guilt just as she went down various paths seeking healing.
Keeping secrets prompted her family to tell Donna to hide in the basement or attic when visitors are not seen and bring shame to the family. Donna has realized that her life was “NOT NORMAL“ as she was led to believe.
Donna now knows that she is Important and deserves compassion.
“Secrets and Silence Keep You Sick “

Beth’s journey started in a family that brought her many heartaches. She wondered how to deal with the many family losses, emotional grief, and trauma.
Grief and trauma are not a simple process as Beth was told. She faced many challenges and “ She Made it Through “.
Beth shares her view to society’s messaging regarding adoption. 
Adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary situation.
 

Alycea was a teenager at 17 living on her own when she discovered she was pregnant. Though her independence and struggle in everyday life, she realized that she could not care for herself and her child,
Alycea had an older sister to teach her life skills at 17 when most only start at age 21.
She knew the realities of bank accounts, paying bills, working a job and surviving in life.
Alycea has traveled the path as many birth mothers of riding the ‘roller coaster ‘ of emotions in building a relationship with her daughter.