Raising Men

Shaun Dawson
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Raising Men is a podcast about parenting, masculinity, and the lifelong journey of raising sons—and ourselves—to be men of courage, character, and purpose. Hosted by Shaun Dawson, each episode features real conversations with parents, leaders, and thinkers redefining what it means to raising men in today’s world.

  1. 13 HR AGO

    Q&A for Parents Raising Boys: Sensitivity, Defiance, and the Father Figure Gap

    In this solo Q&A episode, Shaun Dawson answers some of the most common and emotionally charged parenting questions from the Raising Men community. Drawing on insights from past guests including child development experts, military leaders, and veteran fathers, Shaun unpacks how to raise boys with both strength and emotional health. This episode covers how to respond to a sensitive son, how to handle defiance without crushing a child’s spirit, and whether a surrogate male mentor can help fill the gap when a father is absent.  Key Takeaways  Toughness is not built through emotional coldness but through secure attachment, challenge, and recovery.  A sensitive boy is not weak — he may simply need guidance learning how to regulate and direct strong emotions.  Defiance in young boys is often a test of agency, and leadership works better than coercion.  Parents should aim to build a disciplined will in their sons rather than break their spirit.  When a biological father is absent, intentional male mentors can still play a powerful role in shaping a boy’s path to manhood.“Strength is built through recovery, not through struggle.”  “You do not want a son with a broken will. You want a son with a disciplined will.”  “You’re not just raising a kid. You are forging a man.”00:00 Welcome to Raising Men 00:35 Question 1 — Should I toughen up my sensitive son? 01:05 Stoicism vs emotional shutdown 02:00 Why boys may be more emotionally fragile early on 03:00 Masculinity, purpose, and emotional strength 04:10 Why numbing emotions creates passive men 04:50 Intentional discomfort vs emotional abandonment 05:35 Question 2 — My 4-year-old is defiant. What do I do? 06:05 Why defiance is often a test of agency 06:45 Play, connection, and boundaries 07:15 Respect, leadership, and family drills 08:20 Don’t break his will — discipline it 09:05 Question 3 — Can a mentor replace a father? 09:40 Why male role models matter 10:20 The “general manager” role in parenting 11:10 What to look for in a surrogate father figure 12:15 Why boys need mentors before adolescence 13:00 Final encouragement for parents 14:00 Closing thoughts and call to action People / Guests Mentioned Steve Biddulph Referenced for his work on boys’ emotional development and the mentor phase in adolescence. Eric Davis Referenced for ideas around modern masculinity, intentional discomfort, earned respect, and dad-shaped leadership gaps. Ryan Walton Referenced for emotional avoidance, discipline, and framing struggle as a gift. Devin Kuntzman Referenced for the idea that play and connection outperform coercion in parenting. Lt. Gen. Mark Hertling Referenced for the “general manager” model of fatherhood and leadership from a distance. Emily Houston Referenced for the importance of finding male mentors who navigate the modern world with integrity. Book Mentioned Raising Men by Eric Davis Mentioned as a book written to address the “dad-shaped hole” many boys experience growing up.

    14 min
  2. Navigating the Masculinity Crisis with Deland McCullough

    3 DAYS AGO

    Navigating the Masculinity Crisis with Deland McCullough

    In this episode of Raising Men, Shaun sits down with former NFL player and current Las Vegas Raiders running backs coach Deland McCullough. Deland shares a powerful journey that began with adoption, fatherlessness, and adversity in Youngstown, Ohio. Through football, mentorship, relentless work ethic, and a deep commitment to helping young men reach their potential, Deland built a remarkable career as a player, educator, and coach. His story explores masculinity, emotional development, mentorship, and the generational impact men can have when they choose to lead with purpose.  Key Takeaways Masculinity is not about suppressing emotion but about learning how to express feelings in healthy ways.The environment you grow up in may shape you, but it does not have to determine your destiny.Hard work often unlocks talent that people don’t initially see in themselves.Mentors and role models can completely change the trajectory of a young man’s life.The most meaningful success comes from helping others realize their potential.3. Top Quotes from Deland  “Football wasn’t just a sport for me. It was a structure. It was an outlet.”  “You may not be looking for a father, but I’m going to treat you like you’re my son.”  “Hard work unlocked the talent.”Chapter Markers 00:00 — The Poster on the Wall That Set the Vision 01:05 — Believing Bigger Before It Was Possible 02:12 — Early Coaching Dreams at Miami 03:18 — Letting Life Unfold Without a Master Plan 04:25 — Parallel Paths Without Knowing It 05:38 — Both Starting in High School Coaching 06:45 — First College Job at the Same Program 07:58 — Moving Through the Big Ten Separately 09:10 — Reaching the NFL on Different Roads 10:28 — Both Making It to the Super Bowl 11:35 — Losing to Tom Brady 12:30 — When Your Nemesis Becomes Your Boss 13:32 — Realizing the Pattern Was Too Similar 14:45 — Deciding to Search for His Biological Family 16:02 — Adoption Records Finally Opening 17:25 — Discovering His Mother’s Identity 18:40 — Learning His Father Was Right There All Along 20:05 — The Weight of Telling the Truth 21:24 — Calling the Man He’d Known as Coach 22:48 — “Your Biological Father Is You” 24:12 — Processing the Shock on Both Sides 25:58 — Agreeing to a DNA Test 27:05 — Waiting for Confirmation 28:22 — The Test Comes Back 99.9% 29:30 — Talking Every Day After the Results 30:52 — Seeing Himself in Old Photos 32:10 — Meeting His Biological Mother 34:05 — Recognizing Yourself in the Mirror 36:00 — Ten Minutes Was All It Took 37:48 — Driving to Meet His Father as a Son 39:10 — “My Son” at the Door 40:42 — A Moment That Changed Everything 42:05 — The Pain His Father Had to Carry 43:50 — Turning Pain Into Purpose 45:24 — Becoming the Father He Never Had 47:10 — Four Sons as the Ultimate Blessing 49:02 — Refusing to Repeat the Past 50:40 — Fatherhood as the Crown Jewel 52:31 — Raising Grounded Men With Privilege 54:18 — Intention Over Perfection 56:02 — Building a Mental Library of Counterexamples 58:10 — Teaching Boys Through Presence 01:00:21 — One Principle for Raising Excellent Men 01:02:32 — Detailed, Dependable, Disciplined 01:05:10 — Discipline Matters Most Under Pressure 01:07:30 — Excellence Is Failing Less Over Time 01:10:05 — Knowing the Standard Before You Measure 01:12:18 — Being a Blessing or a Lesson 01:14:38 — Treating Players Like Sons 01:17:05 — Extending Fatherhood Beyond Family 01:19:30 — Final Reflections on Raising Men 01:39:03 — Closing Credits Books, Links, and References Mentioned Runs in the Family:  Co-authored by Deland McCullough and Sarah Spainhttps://www.harpercollins.com/products/runs-in-the-family-deland-mccullough-sarah-spain Why Gender Matters by Leonard Sax https://www.leonardsax.com/why-gender-matters/ Framework Mentioned Deland describes the idea of emotional DNA as the patterns we inherit from how we were raised. These patterns influence how men handle emotions, masculinity, relationships, and fatherhood. Recognizing these inherited behaviors allows men to break negative cycles and intentionally raise the next generation differently.

    1hr 39min
  3. Beyond the Battlefield: A Navy SEAL’s Guide to Raising Good Men with Eric Davis

    1 APR

    Beyond the Battlefield: A Navy SEAL’s Guide to Raising Good Men with Eric Davis

    In this episode of the Raising Men podcast, Shaun sits down with former Navy SEAL, master sniper instructor, and author Eric Davis, whose book Raising Men helped inspire the very foundation of this show. Eric shares the deeply personal story that drove him to explore masculinity, fatherhood, and the role men play in shaping the next generation. The conversation explores the modern masculinity crisis, why traditional models of manhood are failing many young men, and how fathers can intentionally raise resilient, purpose-driven sons. Drawing on his experiences in SEAL training, entrepreneurship, and parenting, Eric introduces his framework for modern masculinity and explains how fathers can lead their families with clarity, purpose, and example. Key Takeaways Traditional masculinity is failing not because it was wrong but because the modern world has changed and requires new strengths.A man’s role is to use his passions to harmoniously fulfill and care for his personal, financial, and professional purposes.Resilience is not a personality trait but a skill that can be trained by maintaining and restoring the ability to act.Fathers must lead from the front by living the life they hope their children will one day emulate.Intentional parenting requires clarity of language, purpose, and example rather than vague ideas about what manhood should be.Quotes from Eric Davis “Traditional masculinity didn’t fail because it was broken — it failed because the environment changed.” “The role of a father is to use his passions to harmoniously fulfill and care for his personal, financial, and professional purposes.”  “If you’re living a good intentional life, your children will eventually follow it.”  Chapter Markers 00:00 — Why Strong Families Make a Strong Country 00:46 — Introducing Eric Davis and the Philosophy of Raising Men 01:37 — The Masculinity Crisis and Why This Podcast Exists 02:09 — Losing His Father at 16 and Searching for Male Guidance 04:06 — Is There Really a Masculinity Crisis? 05:00 — The Problem With “Traditional” Masculinity Online 07:49 — Defining Modern Masculinity 08:33 — Using Passion to Fulfil Life’s Purposes 11:01 — Why Purpose Helps Young Men Avoid Distraction 12:00 — Lessons From SEAL Training for Raising Sons 13:03 — Discipline, Consequences, and Teaching Responsibility 14:00 — Adventure and Outdoor Challenges as Parenting Tools 15:00 — Why Resilience Is Central to SEAL Training 15:33 — The Difference Between Perseverance and Resilience 16:16 — How SEAL Training Builds Resilience 18:00 — Why Some Candidates Secretly Quit 19:03 — The Mental Game of Enduring Hardship 21:27 — Don’t Borrow Suffering From the Future 22:05 — Turning Outdoor Experiences Into Life Lessons 23:05 — Parenting With Intention and Clear Outcomes 24:10 — Teaching Kids Identity Through Shared Experiences 26:41 — Why Boys Need Modern Rites of Passage 28:13 — The Importance of Serious Responsibility in Manhood 29:12 — Why Clear Language and Definitions Matter 30:00 — How Families Create a Strong Nation 31:10 — Why Old Work Models Are Failing Modern Fathers 32:00 — Defining Purpose in Life 34:16 — Why Personal Life Often Gets Sacrificed for Work 35:00 — Aligning Your Life Around Your True Purposes 36:13 — Purpose Already Exists—You Just Need Awareness 37:16 — Designing Life Around What Actually Matters 39:05 — The One Principle Every Parent Should Follow 40:03 — Lead From the Front as a Father 41:06 — Final Thoughts on Raising Sons 41:55 — Podcast Outro Books, Links, and References Raising Men: Lessons Navy SEALs Learned From Their Training and Taught to Their Sons – Eric Davis Eric Davis Official Website https://ericdavis215.com https://instagram.com/eric_davis215 Eric Davis’s Modern Masculinity Framework A father’s role is to: Use his passions to harmoniously fulfill and care for his personal, financial, and professional purposes. Key Components Passion Living authentically and using personal strengths and interests.Purpose Understanding and caring for the key domains of life.Harmony Balancing life domains so no major area breaks down.Leadership by Example Fathers must model the life they want their children to build.Resilience Development Building the capacity to maintain and restore the ability to act under stress.

    42 min
  4. Feminism, Men, and the Future of Raising Strong Boys with Emily Huston

    25 MAR

    Feminism, Men, and the Future of Raising Strong Boys with Emily Huston

    In this deep dive, Shaun sits down with lifelong friend and former professional athlete Emily Huston to discuss the silent crisis of identity and mental health facing boys and men today. From the high-pressure world of elite sports to the "cliff effect" of retirement, Emily shares her journey through depression and professional burnout to build Home Team—a marketplace and community designed to bridge the systemic gaps in athlete care. Key Topics Covered The Masculinity Crisis & The Zero-Sum Game: Why empowering women and girls doesn’t have to come at the expense of boys and men, and how "us vs. them" mentalities prevent true progress.The "Cliff Effect" in Sports: How the sudden loss of structure, community, and purpose at retirement leads to a profound identity crisis for athletes as young as 22.The Impact of NIL and Social Media: The modern pressures on young athletes to be "influencers," which forces them to be "always on" and fuels toxic comparisons and performance anxiety.Training vs. Exercising: The psychological hurdle athletes face when transitioning from a militaristic "no pain, no gain" environment to learning how to move their bodies for health and joy.Preventable Tragedies: A discussion on the rising suicide rates among NCAA athletes and the critical need for better information transfer between institutions (e.g., the case of Marshawn Neeland).Retirement for an athlete isn't stepping down—it often feels like falling off a cliff. Just because you’re struggling does not mean that you’re weak... but when you’re performing, you can't be weak. It’s difficult to unmask. I have been a fierce advocate for women and girls... but if we women aren’t helping [men], it just continues to get worse. We truly need each other.Resources & Links Mentioned Home Team: Emily’s platform centralizing athlete-centered care, community, and vetted mental health providers. https://hometeamgo.com/Always an Athlete by Hilary Knight (or similar teammate): The book that illustrated the "mountain" of an athletic career and the "cliff" of retirement.NIL (Name, Image, and Likeness): The NCAA policy change allowing college athletes to earn compensation, discussed here regarding its impact on mental health.Connect with Emily Huston Website: https://hometeamgo.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emilymhuston/

    1hr 4min
  5. Raising Brave Boys in a Fearful World with Ryan Walton

    18 MAR

    Raising Brave Boys in a Fearful World with Ryan Walton

    In this honest and wide-ranging conversation, Ryan Walton of Daring to Dad joins Shaun to unpack why so many men find themselves coasting through life — and what it really takes to show up with courage, presence, and emotional integrity for our children. Drawing from fatherhood, personal failures, and deep inner work, Ryan challenges modern dads to confront the parts of themselves they often avoid, cultivate resilience in their sons, and reclaim joy as a masculine virtue. This episode invites every father to stop drifting and start daring — in small daily decisions and in the deepest parts of their lives. Key Takeaways / Topics Covered 1. Why Men Coast — And How to Recognize It Avoidance, addiction, distraction, and numbness as modern forms of “coasting.”How culture profits from keeping men disconnected and passive2. The Power of Awareness & Intentionality How “the deep knowing” inside you reveals when you’re living beneath your potential.The Conan-the-Barbarian brain vs. the Sherlock Holmes brain3. What It Really Means to DARE as a Father Facing yourself instead of fixing your kids.Stepping into presence, responsibility, and honest self-examination.The cultural shift: modern fatherhood expectations vs. past generations. raising-men-podcast-recording-w…4. Joy, Vulnerability, and Masculine Emotion Why joy feels “uncool” to grown men — and why reclaiming it matters.How our kids coach us emotionally, often in the moments we least expect.Allowing boys to feel their full spectrum of emotion5. Practical Tools for Cultivating Courage & Action Community over isolation: why men need other men.Daily reflection questions that build resilience.The power of accountability, feedback, and honest self-inventory.“Face the parts of yourself you’d rather avoid. What we hide in the basement finds its way out — and the bravest work a man can do is confront his own shadow. Isolation is the man-killer. Being with other men who want your success — that’s where real change happens. The struggle is a gift. Don’t steal it from your kids. Let them wrestle, fail, and rise.Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — Why Emotional Control Is a Masculine Strength 00:32 — Meet Ryan Walton 01:56 — Why Men Coast 03:43 — The Difference Between Rest and Avoidance 05:44 — How Numbing Becomes the Default 07:26 — Technology Profits From Men Being Numb 09:03 — Isolation as the Silent Killer 11:04 — Systems Matter, Responsibility Still Counts 12:25 — What Daring Looks Like in Fatherhood 13:12 — Becoming the Man Your Kids Need 15:17 — Training a Bias Toward Action 16:45 — Anxiety Shrinks With Action 18:48 — Why Breaking Things Down Works 20:16 — A Driving Range Lesson in Joy 21:58 — The Vulnerability of Joy 23:50 — Reclaiming Childlike Wonder 25:48 — Why Men Hide Their Excitement 28:02 — When We Steal Joy From Ourselves 29:02 — Daring Means Feeling Everything 31:16 — Accountability Changes Everything 32:42 — Three Questions to Break Coasting 33:47 — Where Are You Not Telling the Truth 34:59 — The Power of Receiving Feedback 37:35 — A Moment That Changed Everything 39:49 — Why Repair Matters More Than Perfection 42:36 — Asking Kids for Feedback 44:55 — Teaching Resilience Without Stealing the Struggle 47:36 — Modeling Recovery After Failure 48:41 — Letting Kids Feel Their Feelings 50:45 — Why Men Learned to Shut Emotions Down 52:19 — Emotional Flexibility as Strength 53:32 — One Principle: Face What You’re Avoiding 55:12 — Closing Reflections Supporting Content Ryan Walton — Daring to Dad https://www.daringtodad.com/ Carl Jung’s Shadow & Inner Work Discussed as a foundational idea behind confronting the parts of oneself we avoid.Overview of Jung’s Shadow concept: https://www.simplypsychology.org/carl-jung.htmlMental Health as Mental FlexibilityRyan reframed “mental health” as mental stamina, resilience, and flexibility — a framing more intuitive for many men.  Daily Self-Reflection Questions (from Ryan) What am I avoiding?What am I pretending isn’t heavy, but really is?What one thing can I do today to move the needle?Where am I not telling the truth — to others or myself?Concepts Discussed Accountability groups / Men’s circlesDoomscrolling & the “numbing economy”The Conan-the-Barbarian brain vs. Sherlock Holmes brain (an analogy Shaun shared)

    56 min
  6. Letters From War: What One Father Wanted His Sons to Know About Courage with Lt. Gen. Mark Hertling

    11 MAR

    Letters From War: What One Father Wanted His Sons to Know About Courage with Lt. Gen. Mark Hertling

    In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun sits down with retired U.S. Army Lieutenant General Mark Hertling, a leader who spent nearly four decades commanding soldiers in some of the most challenging environments imaginable. But beyond the battlefield, Mark is also a father who once wrote a series of journal entries to his young sons while preparing for war during the first Gulf War—letters he hoped would guide them if he didn’t make it home. Years later, those handwritten reflections became the foundation for his book If I Don’t Return: A Father’s Wartime Journal. In this conversation, Mark shares the story behind the journal, the lessons he hoped to pass on to his sons, and what military leadership can teach fathers about character, courage, humility, and raising boys to become thoughtful, resilient men.  Key Takeaways True masculinity begins with character, self-awareness, and respect for others rather than biology or bravado. Leadership and parenting both require helping others discover and polish the “diamond” within themselves. Words and intentions mean little without consistent action and discipline behind them. Facing fear honestly and accepting both victory and defeat with humility builds lasting character. Fathers shape their children most powerfully through the example they live rather than the advice they give. Quotes from Mark Hertling “Masculinity is based on your character and how you influence others—not on biology.”  “Within each one of us is a diamond that has to be polished.”  “You don’t have to be loud to be a great leader.” Chapter Markers 00:00:00 The journal of a young father heading to war00:03:03 Character as the foundation of leadership00:06:06 Quiet leadership vs bravado00:09:09 Why General Hertling decided to write the book00:12:10 Lessons from the Iraqi Army and early military experiences00:15:13 Rediscovering the wartime journal years later00:18:13 Teaching resilience and responsibility to children00:21:14 Historical lessons from World War I and II00:24:15 Learning to admit mistakes as a leader00:27:17 Striving for excellence and elite standards00:30:18 Leadership lessons from elite athletes00:33:19 Developing young leaders in the military00:36:20 The importance of physical fitness in leadership00:39:22 Building discipline and standards in teams00:42:24 What fathers can learn from military leadership00:45:26 The role of adversity in shaping men00:48:27 Mentorship and modeling character00:51:29 Leadership under pressure and uncertainty00:54:30 Teaching courage and accountability00:57:32 Preparing the next generation of leaders01:00:34 Advice to fathers raising boys today01:03:36 Final reflections on service, leadership, and family Books, Links, and References Mentioned If I Don’t Return: A Father’s Wartime Journal – Mark Hertling https://www.amazon.com/If-Dont-Return-Fathers-Wartime/dp/B0Mark Hertling's Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mark-hertling-dba-57987066/Marcus Aurelius – Stoic Philosophy Reference https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marcus_AureliusDouglas MacArthur Prayer for a Son https://www.usna.edu/Commandant/_files/documents/MacArthur_Prayer.pdfMichael Jordan Quote on Practice  Referenced during discussion about discipline and mastery.Frameworks Mentioned The “Polish the Diamond” Leadership Concept Mark uses the metaphor of a diamond to describe personal and leadership development: Every person contains a “diamond” of potential.Growth requires intentional effort and discipline.Leaders and parents help others refine their strengths.Self-reflection and feedback are the tools used to polish that diamond.This framework ties together Mark’s approach to both leadership and fatherhood.

    1hr 9min
  7. From Chaos to Calm: Devon Kuntzman on Thriving Through Toddlerhood

    4 MAR

    From Chaos to Calm: Devon Kuntzman on Thriving Through Toddlerhood

    If you’ve ever had a toddler throw themselves on the floor because you cut their toast the wrong way, you know how intense those early years can be. But what if toddlerhood isn’t something to survive? What if it’s one of the richest seasons for growth—both for our kids and for us? Today on Raising Men, Shaun sits down with Devon Kuntzman, parenting coach, author of Transforming Toddlerhood, and the leading voice helping parents move from chaos to connection. Devon brings practical tools, mindset reframes, and compassionate strategies that help parents decode behavior, regulate themselves, and raise confident, emotionally healthy kids. Key Takeaways 1. Reframing the “Terrible Twos”: Why culture primes us to expect chaos, and how fear shapes our experience of toddlerhood.  2. Behavior as Communication:  Toddlers aren’t being “bad”—they’re expressing needs, emotions, and limitations in brain development.  3. Emotional Regulation for Parents:  How to avoid jumping on your child’s “emotional roller coaster.”  4. Healthy, Developmentally Smart Discipline:  Limits + connection + teaching skills = effective discipline.  5. Collaboration, Not Control:  Using collaborative problem-solving with older toddlers (3–4+) to create buy-in and reduce conflict.  All behavior is communication. Toddlers aren’t being bad—they’re having a hard time. Control is an illusion. Parenting through fear creates compliance, not skills. Practice makes progress. Every moment is another chance to try again.Timestamps / Chapter Markers 00:00 — Observe and Describe, Not Catastrophise 00:30 — Welcome & Meet Devin Kuntzman 01:05 — Rethinking the “Terrible Twos” 02:04 — When We Look for Problems, We Find Them 03:10 — Problems as Opportunities for Growth 03:38 — Toddlerhood as a Critical Developmental Window 04:35 — Younger vs. Older Toddlers 05:31 — Behaviour Is Communication 06:20 — Lower Brain vs. Upper Brain 07:04 — Why Toddlers Aren’t Manipulating You 08:10 — Staying Out of the Emotional Roller Coaster 08:56 — Establish Safety First 09:40 — The Fear Loop Parents Fall Into 10:40 — Ego, Judgment, and Parenting Stress 11:25 — Observe and Describe in Action 12:47 — Teaching Skills Instead of Punishing Behaviour 13:35 — Responding Differently Based on Intensity 14:22 — Emotional Skills Are Still Skills 15:20 — Tantrums and Loss of Control 16:34 — Less Is More During Meltdowns 17:40 — Moving Forward After Setting a Limit 18:31 — Logical vs. Arbitrary Consequences 20:31 — Waiting Until the Brain Comes Back Online 22:30 — Fear-Based Compliance vs. Skill Building 24:02 — Regulating Yourself First 25:10 — Practical Grounding Techniques for Parents 26:15 — Repairing After You Lose It 28:02 — The Four-Step Repair Process 30:13 — “Wind the Clock” 31:32 — Disrupting the Stress Cycle 32:40 — Giving Yourself Grace as a Parent 33:51 — Windshield vs. Rearview Mirror Parenting 35:00 — Control vs. Connection 35:43 — When Control Becomes an Illusion 37:58 — Compliance, Fear, and Hiding Behaviour 39:20 — What Positive Discipline Really Means 39:54 — Meeting Needs Within Limits 41:36 — Collaborative Problem Solving 43:40 — Coaching Instead of Refereeing 45:45 — Why Feeling Seen Changes Everything 46:45 — One Operating Principle: Everyone Is Doing Their Best 47:29 — Closing Reflections Supporting Content Transforming Toddlerhood (Book) — https://transformingtoddlerhood.com/book/(Referenced throughout the episode as Devon discusses its chapters, frameworks, and principles.) raising-men-recording-with-devo…Transforming Toddlerhood (Website) — https://www.transformingtoddlerhood.com/Instagram: @transformingtoddlerhood — https://www.instagram.com/transformingtoddlerhood/Frameworks Mentioned Observe & Describe — Nonjudgmental narration to interrupt assumptions. Recipe for Healthy, Effective Discipline:ConnectionLimitFollow-throughTeaching skills Four-Step Repair Process (from Devon’s book, pg. ~49): Take ownershipCheck in on impactApologizeRedo (state what you’ll do next time) Concepts Referenced Younger vs. Older Toddlers (ages 1–2 vs. 3–4, differences in language + brain maturity)Collaborative Problem Solving — Inviting toddlers to generate solutions. Emotional Contagion — Why parent regulation is the first step in child regulation. Logical vs. Arbitrary Consequences — And why toddlers don’t connect punishment with behavior. Grounding Strategies for Parents — Breathing, sensory check-ins, movement or stillness based on temperament.

    48 min
  8. What Trauma-Informed Parenting Looks Like at Home with Ryan North

    25 FEB

    What Trauma-Informed Parenting Looks Like at Home with Ryan North

    Ryan North, co-founder of One Big Happy Home, shares his journey raising six children—four of whom were adopted from the child welfare system—and how those experiences shaped his trauma-informed approach to parenting. This episode explores the "connection-first" methodology, the essential balance between nurture and structure, and the vital distinction between raising "nice" boys and "good" men. 1. Why Trauma-Informed Parenting Matters for Every Dad Ryan explains why trauma-informed principles apply far beyond adoption and foster care — because every child faces adversity, stress, and emotional wounds in today’s world.  2. Connection vs. Control Ryan breaks down why traditional discipline focuses on control, but healing and strong fatherhood come from prioritizing connection — without sliding into permissiveness.  3. The Power of “Yes When We Can, No When We Must” He shares the philosophy that shaped his home: saying yes when it builds relationship, and saying no only when it’s truly in the child’s long-term best interest.  4. Raising Boys in a Digital, Post-Pandemic, AI-Distracted World From screen addiction to AI “companions,” Ryan reveals why today is the hardest era in 100+ years to be a child — and how dads can anchor their sons in stability, presence, and emotional safety. r 5. What It Means to Raise Good Men (Not Just “Nice” Ones) Ryan draws a powerful distinction between “nice” men and “good” men — and how fathers can raise sons who protect, provide, and lead with courage and compassion. Quotes by Ryan North “Authority isn’t about control — it’s about trust.” “The point of parenting is not to make my life easy — the point of parenting is to develop another person.” “We’re not trying to raise nice men. We’re trying to raise good men — the kind who run into the burning building, not film it for likes.” Timestamps  00:00 — Holding Kids to Adult Standards 00:30 — Welcome & Meet Ryan North 01:10 — What Drew Ryan Into Trauma-Informed Care 02:10 — Parenting Adopted and Biological Children the Same Way 03:20 — Connection vs. Compliance 04:17 — Why This Isn’t Permissive Parenting 05:10 — Parenting Isn’t Meant to Be Convenient 06:06 — Saying Yes When You Can, No When You Must 07:24 — The Swaddling Metaphor 08:20 — Secure Attachment Creates Confident Exploration 10:04 — Proof of Concept: Parenting Over Time 12:19 — Challenging Limiting Labels 12:46 — Small Traumas Still Matter 13:30 — Harmful Parenting Beliefs We Inherit 14:42 — Children Are Fragile and Capable of Resilience 15:55 — Parenting in a Digital, AI-Driven World 17:51 — Trauma vs. Adversity 18:45 — You’re the Parent, Not Their Friend 19:09 — Authority Without Fear or Control 20:15 — Screen Boundaries Explained, Not Enforced 21:30 — Calm Presence in Conflict 23:13 — Saying Yes to Needs, Not Wants 25:15 — Withholding Connection Is Not Discipline 27:12 — Defiance vs. Addiction 29:09 — Behaviour Is Communication 30:41 — Why “Crying It Out” Causes Harm 32:40 — How Behaviour Becomes a Strategy 35:29 — Teaching Independence Through Dependence 37:15 — The Danger of Raising “Nice” Men 39:01 — Raising Men Who Protect and Lead 41:02 — Protection, Provision, and Presence 42:53 — Male Mental Health and Suicide 44:45 — Choosing the Right Partner Matters 47:09 — Parenting as a Partnership 48:35 — The “Pineapple” Exit Strategy 50:00 — Planning Outside the Moment 53:12 — Kids Learn What We Model 55:10 — Teaching the Art of Repair 57:33 — Repairing Relationships After Rupture 01:01:48 — What a “Happy Home” Really Means 01:02:48 — Operating Principle: Curiosity Over Judgment 01:03:17 — Final Reflections 01:05:07 — Closing Credits Supporting Content Secure Base / Attachment Research – foundational attachment science discussed when exploring dependence → independence.Nurture + Structure = Felt Safety – illustrated through the “baby swaddle” metaphor.“Yes When We Can, No When We Must” Parenting Framework — Ryan’s family rule.“Pineapple Strategy” – A pre-agreed cue between Ryan and his wife to step out of heated moments with dignity.Apology Framework (Own it → Say sorry → Ask forgiveness → Commit to do better) — modeled to his children and now mirrored back by them.The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/730610/the-anxious-generation-by-jonathan-haidt/One Big Happy Home Website https://www.onebighappyhome.com/One Big Happy Home Podcast https://www.onebighappyhome.com/podcast/

    1hr 5min
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About

Raising Men is a podcast about parenting, masculinity, and the lifelong journey of raising sons—and ourselves—to be men of courage, character, and purpose. Hosted by Shaun Dawson, each episode features real conversations with parents, leaders, and thinkers redefining what it means to raising men in today’s world.

Information

  • Creator
    Shaun Dawson
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    28
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Shaun Dawson
  • Show Website
    Raising Men

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