The Choose Yourself Channel

Hakeem Bourne Mcfarlane
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  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT

Hosted by Hakeem Bourne McFarlane, author of Choose Yourself to Be Chosen and founder of the Choose Yourself Community (CYC). Welcome to The Choose Yourself Channel : where personal growth gets real, faith gets practical, and healing comes with humor. This isn't your average self-help talk. It’s the CYC-GYM - where we flex the dorsal cortex, roast our old habits, and build foundations stronger than our excuses through accountability and innercise. We talk discipline, desire, detoxing from dysfunction, and designing a life that actually feels good based on balance ... from cold showers to calling yourself out. One episode might sound like therapy, another like stand-up, and the next like church with better playlists and preachers. Here, we don’t fake peace for followers. We face our triggers, evaluate our environments, and invest in our evolution. Because choosing yourself isn’t just a slogan ... it’s the daily sport of self-respect! 🐬 Expect truth. Expect laughter. Expect to be uncomfortable - in the best way. Join the movement every Tuesday at 10 a.m. with the Choose Yourself Community on zoom to meet other self choosers virtually hosted by Hakeem. This is The Choose Yourself Channel. Raw. Relatable. Real as growth gets.

  1. ☕️ Angel - Create First. Doubt Never.

    6 APR

    ☕️ Angel - Create First. Doubt Never.

    Some people wait for the perfect moment… others start building with whatever they have. In this episode, we sit down with Angel, owner of Benton Brew Coffee House, a creator, entrepreneur, and visionary who turned a 20-year dream into a real space for connection, creativity, and community. This conversation dives into what it actually looks like to choose yourself while still working a 9–5, balancing responsibilities, and investing into your vision daily. From selling magazines as a kid to creating studios, coffee lounges, and creative spaces, Angel shows that success isn’t about one big moment.. it’s about stacking checkpoints, discipline, and belief over time. We talk about the importance of routine, presence, and awareness, from something as simple as drinking water in the morning to being intentional with your time, your energy, and even how you eat because building your dream isn’t just about business… it’s about becoming someone who can sustain it. Takeaways ⬇️ Your dream doesn’t require you to quit everything, it requires you to use what you have wiselyThere isn’t always one “trigger point” ..growth is built through consistent checkpointsPresence is power! Whether in your work, your meals, or your relationshipsYour foundation (routines, discipline, awareness) determines your futureYou don’t need to know how you’ll get there but you must believe where you’re goingAt some point, you have to decide… Are you going to keep consuming life or start creating something from it? Your dream isn’t waiting on time… it’s waiting on you.

    28 min
  2. 🐬 Tree Kadasyso - Straight From The Roots with

    2 APR

    🐬 Tree Kadasyso - Straight From The Roots with

    Some people go through trauma and stay stuck… others go through it and build something from it. In this episode, we sit down with Tree Kadayso - a powerful self-chooser, mother, and leader in the CYC who shares how her story of childhood trauma, abuse, and environmental challenges didn’t define her… it refined her. This conversation goes deep into what it really looks like to face your triggers, change your environment, and build a foundation strong enough to carry not just you but your family forward. From navigating generational patterns to raising kids with awareness, Tree shows that healing isn’t just personal… it’s legacy work. We talk about the moments where it would’ve been easier to fall back into old habits and how choosing yourself daily, through discipline and community, creates a completely different future.. because at the end of the day, your past may shape you but your choices define you. Takeaways ⬇️ Your trauma is real but it doesn’t get to run your life foreverAwareness is the first step but action is what changes everythingYour environment can either trap you or transform youThe foundation you build today impacts your entire family tomorrowChoosing yourself is how you break generational cyclesAt some point, we all have to make a decision… Are we going to keep living from what happened to us or start building from who we’re becoming? Our story isn’t our limitation… it’s our responsibility. “You’re not your past… you’re your patterns ... and your patterns can change with you next choice.” Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Choose Yourself, Heal Your Gut Webinar 🏝️ Costa Rica Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    1hr 11min
  3. 🌲Get over it, Get after it (Tree Kadayso Preview)

    1 APR

    🌲Get over it, Get after it (Tree Kadayso Preview)

    Choosing yourself through trauma, triggers, and transformation Nobody signs up for trauma… not you, not me, not your baby mama. But we all go through something. The real question is what are you doing with it? In this preview, we talk about how pain can either keep you stuck or push you into your next level. From childhood abuse to self-abuse (yeah… hitting snooze, sugar overload, late-night cravings .. we see you), this episode calls out the habits that keep us in the same loop because it’s not just what happened to you… it’s what you keep doing to yourself after. We introduce Tree Kadayso one of the strongest OG self-choosers I've ever encountered, whose story comes from real adversity - abuse, loss, traumatic childhood and a toxic environment where silence was normalized... but instead of staying in victim mode, she embraced the TEFIC process: triggers, environment, foundation, investment, and contribution and turned her pain into purpose! Your past might not be our fault… but our future is 100% your responsibility. So are you still sitting in the same story or are you ready to evolve? Grow With Us ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Zoom (Tuesdays 10 a.m.) ❤️‍🩹 Choose Yourself, Heal Your Gut Webinar 🏝️ Costa Rica Retreat 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel

    12 min
  4. ✍🏾 Joe Cubero - The Dating Playbook

    20 MAR

    ✍🏾 Joe Cubero - The Dating Playbook

    In this episode, we sit down with Joe Cubero (aka The Professional Ex) - author, creator, and relationship strategist who breaks down why so many people stay stuck in the same relationship cycles. This isn’t about blaming your ex… This is about becoming the version of you that stops creating them. We unpack the patterns, the ignored red flags, the lowered standards, and the identity you carry into every relationship whether you realize it or not. You don’t attract what you want. You attract what you tolerate. 🔥 What We Cover ✨ Why most people repeat the same relationship patterns ✨ The difference between choosing someone vs. needing someone ✨ Red flags we see but ignore ✨ How your lifestyle and habits shape your love life ✨ Why healing is required, not optional ✨ Becoming someone who walks away with self-respect Joe Cubero IG Order Joe's Book - The Dating Playbook Joe Cubero shares insights from his book, breaking down: The do’s, don’ts, and deal-breakers in modern datingHow to recognize unhealthy patterns earlyWhat it really means to choose yourself in relationships🌴 Live Event Announcement We’re bringing this conversation to life… 📍 April 25th | Florida Workshop Joe Cubero x Hakeem Bourne McFarlane A live experience focused on: Identity & self-worthRelationship standardsBuilding a foundation that attracts aligned partnershipsThis is more than a workshop… it’s a reset. 🐬 Choose Yourself Takeaway If you keep attracting the same person in different bodies… It’s not coincidence—it’s conditioning. Change your standards. Change your habits. Change your life. 🚀 Tap In 🎟️ Join the “CYC” for calendar details 📖 Grab Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Subscribe to the Choose Yourself Channel

    1hr 1min
  5. Stop Swiping, Start Choosing Yourself (Joe Cubero Preview)

    19 MAR

    Stop Swiping, Start Choosing Yourself (Joe Cubero Preview)

    In this preview, we break down a real problem in modern dating: overconsumption. Too many options, too much scrolling, too much stimulation and not enough self-awareness, discipline, or intention. This preview dives into why Choose Yourself is the foundation of dating because your relationships will always reflect the choices you’re making in your own life. We talk about how this generation has made dating a game of consumption… instead of a process of growth, alignment, and identity. You build it by becoming someone worth connecting with not chasing appearance or temporary satisfaction This sets the tone for the full episode, where we go deeper into dating, identity, and self-mastery with The Professional Ex, Joe Cubero. Tap into the preview… and start choosing yourself first!

    9 min
  6. 🐬 Energy Ashley - From Burnout to Building CYC Kids

    9 MAR

    🐬 Energy Ashley - From Burnout to Building CYC Kids

    When you keep donating your energy to everything else… eventually your body files a complaint. Most people don’t intentionally sacrifice their health .. they slowly donate it like spare change. A little sleep skipped here, a meal rushed there, workouts postponed, stress normalized… until the body finally says enough. In this episode of the Choose Yourself Channel, we sit down with Energy Ashley : educator, coach, parent, and one of the very first members of the Choose Yourself Community. Her journey began with a powerful trigger point: burnout, chronic pain, inflammation, and a moment where she literally found herself crawling across the floor because her body could no longer keep up with the life she was living. Instead of staying stuck in survival mode, she chose to rebuild her life through the Choose Yourself process before even knowing what it was! ... shifting her mindset, repairing her health, building daily foundations, and rediscovering purpose on her own. A true self chooser! Now she’s helping lead the next generation through CYC Kids, a branch of the Choose Yourself Community focused on helping parents, leaders, and young people build stronger foundations early in life. We meet monthly on zoom with other families, parents and leaders. Because when you fix the foundation… the entire house begins to change. Tap into this episode to hear how one decision to choose yourself can ripple into your family, your community, and the next generation. @Energyashley Choose Yourself Community (CYC) Weekly accountability + monthly CYC Kids leadership sessions.

    54 min
  7. 🐬 Why Your Growth Is Stuck Without Community (Energy Ashley Preview)

    8 MAR

    🐬 Why Your Growth Is Stuck Without Community (Energy Ashley Preview)

    In this preview episode, we break down a powerful truth most people overlook: choosing yourself was never meant to be a solo sport. We’ve been conditioned to think independence means isolation, but the reality is that humans are designed for systems, connection, and accountability. Even the body operates this way: your brain has hemispheres, your heart has chambers, and your body runs on interconnected systems. Life works the same way. big (6) This short preview dives into the philosophy behind the Choose Yourself process: recognizing your trigger points, evaluating your environment, building strong foundations, investing in yourself, and ultimately contributing from overflow. We talk about why isolation increases relapse, why community strengthens discipline, and how surrounding yourself with the right people can transform habits, health, and purpose. You’ll also hear how the Choose Yourself Community (CYC) helps people break free from victimhood, addiction, burnout, and old programming while building the systems that support real change. This episode also sets the stage for the next full conversation, where we’ll bring on one of the earliest members of the community to share what it looks like when someone fully commits to the process and turns personal growth into leadership. Tap into the preview, and get ready for the full episode!

    11 min
  8. 🏝️ Waren English - Foundation Over Feelings

    4 FEB

    🏝️ Waren English - Foundation Over Feelings

    In this episode, we sit down with Waren English for a real, unfiltered conversation about health, discipline, and building a foundation when life doesn’t give you ideal conditions. From immigrating from the Caribbean and living with his family in a single bedroom in New York, to navigating injury, career pivots, and uncertainty, Waren shares how action became the bridge between confusion and confidence. Grow with Waren : CLICK HERE We talk about why so many people will clock in early for a boss they barely like, but won’t clock 20 minutes for the body they’re stuck with for life. The conversation moves through obesity, overconsumption, and the modern contradiction of being overfed, overstimulated, and still exhausted. Waren breaks down how fitness became his anchor for energy, focus, and self-trust and why protecting your health is foundational to leadership, purpose, and contribution. The episode also dives deep into Warren’s background in pharmacy and why he ultimately walked away from traditional pharmaceutical pathways. We explore prevention over reaction, food quality over food noise, and how modern systems often treat symptoms while ignoring behavior, sleep, nutrition, and movement. A major portion of the conversation unpacks peptides and GLP-1s what they actually are, how they work in the body, why they’re effective, and why they fail without discipline, nutrition, and training to support them. This isn’t a conversation about shortcuts. It’s about alignment. About treating the body like a performance machine instead of a rental car. About using tools as tools not crutches and about understanding that when your foundation is strong, pressure doesn’t break you, it reveals you. Takeaways from the episode: Confidence doesn’t come from clarity, it comes from actionHealth is a prerequisite for focus, leadership, and longevityOverconsumption isn’t a hunger problem, it’s a regulation problemPeptides and GLP-1s can support change, but habits determine outcomesPrevention, movement, and nutrition outperform willpower every timeAre you building a body that can hold your purpose or one that negotiates under pressure? Grow With the CYC ⬇️ 🐬 CYC Accountability Zoom (weekly) ❤️‍🩹 Choose Yourself, Heal Your Gut Opportunity Zoom 🏝️ CYC Retreat (Annual) 📖 Choose Yourself to Be Chosen 🎙️ Choose Yourself Channel (please leave a review!)

    50 min
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About

Hosted by Hakeem Bourne McFarlane, author of Choose Yourself to Be Chosen and founder of the Choose Yourself Community (CYC). Welcome to The Choose Yourself Channel : where personal growth gets real, faith gets practical, and healing comes with humor. This isn't your average self-help talk. It’s the CYC-GYM - where we flex the dorsal cortex, roast our old habits, and build foundations stronger than our excuses through accountability and innercise. We talk discipline, desire, detoxing from dysfunction, and designing a life that actually feels good based on balance ... from cold showers to calling yourself out. One episode might sound like therapy, another like stand-up, and the next like church with better playlists and preachers. Here, we don’t fake peace for followers. We face our triggers, evaluate our environments, and invest in our evolution. Because choosing yourself isn’t just a slogan ... it’s the daily sport of self-respect! 🐬 Expect truth. Expect laughter. Expect to be uncomfortable - in the best way. Join the movement every Tuesday at 10 a.m. with the Choose Yourself Community on zoom to meet other self choosers virtually hosted by Hakeem. This is The Choose Yourself Channel. Raw. Relatable. Real as growth gets.

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