You Can Be Both

Lauren Lanzaretta
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You Can Be Both is hosted by singer/songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, who shares honest conversations about being both gay and Christian—two identities often seen as incompatible. The podcast creates space for LGBTQ+ people of faith to find healing, community, and a deeper connection with Christ while fully embracing who they are. As a first step to your healing journey, I recommend the “LGBTQ+ Healing & Resource Guide” - go to www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth Send testimony/questions to https://bit.ly/49G1tpz

  1. 3 DAYS AGO

    You Can Be Trans AND Christian — Here's Why

    Can you be transgender AND Christian? I'm answering this question directly — and what I learned completely changed my heart. In this episode, I talk about Neeza Powers, a trans Christian woman who faced thousands of hateful comments for being her authentic self. I break down what the Bible actually says about gender, explore Deuteronomy 22:5 in context, and explain why Jesus' ministry was focused on outcasts — not the religiously "perfect." WHAT WE TALK ABOUT: ✅ Neeza Powers' story — Trans Christian attacked online for being her authentic self ✅ Deuteronomy 22:5 debunked — What this verse ACTUALLY meant in historical context ✅ Why Christians cherry-pick Bible verses about gender but ignore others ✅ Intersex people & brain science — Gender isn't as binary as we think ✅ Jesus' ministry focused on outcasts — Not the religiously "perfect" ✅ How my heart changed after talking to trans Christians ✅ A call to love, not judge If you've ever wondered whether being trans conflicts with faith, or if you're a Christian trying to understand the LGBTQ+ community better, this is for you. 📖 FREE LGBTQ+ Healing & Resource Guide: laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth Includes my full testimony + every book, podcast, and resource that helped me reconcile my faith and identity. 🎵 My Music: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" on Spotify, Apple Music, YouTube 📱 Follow me:@lanzaretta @youcanbebothpodcast #TransChristian #LGBTQFaith #ChristianLove #YouCanBeBoth #TransRights #ProgressiveChristianity #QueerTheology #FaithAndIdentity

    36 min

  2. 26 APR

    It's IMPOSSIBLE to Be 'Ex-Gay' — Here's Why

    Here's why "ex-gay" stories are misleading — and why you don't need to change. I'm breaking down why it's impossible to be ex-gay and why these stories you see online are often rooted in trauma, bad behavior, or bisexuality/pansexuality— not actual sexual orientation change. What we're covering: Why trauma gets mistaken for sexual orientationHow people confuse bad behavior with being gayThe truth about bisexuality/pansexuality and "ex-gay" testimoniesWhy the algorithm is feeding you these stories The bottom line: You don't need to change. God loves you exactly as you are. Conversion therapy doesn't work, never has, and never will. Organizations like Exodus International have already admitted this and apologized for the harm they caused. If you're struggling with your identity, feeling pressured to change, or wondering why God hasn't "fixed" you — this episode is for you. 📩 NEED SUPPORT?Download my FREE LGBTQ+ Healing & Resource Guide — it includes my full testimony, books, podcasts, and resources that helped me become confident in who I am and rooted in my relationship with God:https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🎵 MY MUSIC:I process my story through songwriting. Listen on Spotify, Apple Music, or YouTube:Search: Lauren Lanzaretta 📱 CONNECT WITH ME:Instagram: @LanzarettaTikTok: @LanzarettaEmail: youcanbebothpodcast@gmail.com MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:🎬 Pray Away (Netflix documentary about Exodus International) You are loved. You are seen. You are worthy. And you can be both gay and Christian. #GayChristian #ExGay #LGBTQChurch #ConversionTherapy #YouCanBeBoth #GayAndChristian #ChristianLGBTQ #PrayAwayTheGay #LGBTQFaith #QueerChristian #AffirmingTheology #ExodusInternational #LGBTQHealing

    30 min

  3. 19 APR

    Former Anti-Gay Pastor: 'I Was Wrong About LGBTQ+ People'

    "For years, I stood in the pulpit and preached that homosexuality was a sin. I believed the Bible was clear. I thought I was right. I was wrong."In this powerful episode of You Can Be Both, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Pastor Joe Smith, a straight, cisgender pastor who spent years preaching traditional, non-affirming theology—until his understanding completely transformed.This isn't a story about a pastor who came out. It's about a pastor who changed his mind.Joe shares his journey from confidently condemning LGBTQ+ people from the pulpit to becoming an advocate and ally. He talks about what scriptures he got wrong, what made him reconsider his theology, and why he now believes you absolutely CAN be gay and Christian.This conversation is for:✅ Pastors and church leaders wrestling with LGBTQ+ theology✅ LGBTQ+ people hurt by the church✅ Parents trying to reconcile their faith and their LGBTQ+ child✅ Anyone who's been told they have to choose between faith and identityJoe shares:✅ Why he used to preach against homosexuality✅ The moment he started questioning his theology✅ How he studied scripture with fresh eyes✅ What the "clobber passages" actually mean in context✅ The harm he caused and his journey toward repair✅ Why he now proudly affirms LGBTQ+ people✅ His message to pastors still preaching condemnation✅ His message to LGBTQ+ people hurt by the churchIN THIS EPISODE:[00:00] Introduction[02:30] Joe's background: Growing up in conservative Christianity[08:15] Why he preached against homosexuality[14:40] The moment doubt crept in[22:10] Re-studying the "clobber passages"[30:45] What the Bible actually says (and doesn't say)[38:20] The harm of non-affirming theology[45:00] His apology to the LGBTQ+ community[52:15] What he wants other pastors to know[58:30] What he wants LGBTQ+ people to know[01:04:00] How churches can become truly affirmingRESOURCES:📖 Download the FREE LGBTQ+ Healing and Resource Guide:👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth🏳️‍🌈 Crisis Support:The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 (24/7 crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth)GLAAD: Resources for LGBTQ+ ChristiansQ Christian Fellowship: Community for LGBTQ+ Christians💜 Support the Mission:If this podcast has helped you, please consider donating to help us expand our reach and support more LGBTQ+ individuals and allies navigating faith and identity.👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbebothFOLLOW YOU CAN BE BOTH:📸 Instagram: [@youcanbeboth]🎵 TikTok: [@youcanbeboth]🎙️ Podcast: Search "You Can Be Both" wherever you listenFOLLOW LAUREN LANZARETTA:📸 Instagram: [@laurenlanzaretta]🎵 TikTok: [@laurenlanzaretta]🌐 Website: laurenlanzaretta.comSHARE THIS MESSAGE:💬 Know a pastor questioning their theology? Share this episode.💬 Know an LGBTQ+ person hurt by the church? Send them this story of change.💬 Know parents struggling to reconcile faith and their child's identity? This is for them. 🔔 Subscribe so you never miss stories of transformation and hope.👍 Leave a comment—your story matters. The church CAN change. Theology CAN evolve. Love CAN win. You can be both.A NOTE FROM LAUREN:If you're a pastor or church leader reading this, please know: It's okay to change your mind. Admitting you were wrong takes more courage than doubling down on harmful theology. The LGBTQ+ community needs more leaders like Joe—people willing to do the hard work of rethinking what they were taught.If you're LGBTQ+ and you've been hurt by churches like the one Joe used to lead, please know: Not all pastors stay stuck. Some are willing to learn, grow, and change. And those who hurt you were wrong—not you.#AffirmingPastor #GayChristian #PastorChanges #AffirmingTheology #ReligiousTrauma #ChurchHurt #ProgressiveChristianity #LGBTQAffirming #YouCanBeBoth #ChristianAlly

    1hr 23min

  4. 12 APR

    Jaden Ivey Pride Night Controversy Explained | Gay Christian Responds

    NBA player Jaden Ivey was recently suspended for making homophobic comments about Pride Night, calling it "unrighteous" and against his Christian beliefs. But when did being Christian become about being the moral police instead of loving people? In this episode, I break down why Jaden Ivey's comments are the opposite of what Jesus taught, why Pride Night matters for LGBTQ+ people who have been marginalized and discriminated against for decades, and why Christians need to stop using their beliefs to justify hate. Here's the truth: LGBTQ+ people are human beings. We wake up, go to work, have families, and try to survive just like everyone else. We've been kicked out of churches, rejected by our families, physically assaulted, and even murdered simply for being who we are. And now, when the NBA says, "Hey, we're going to have ONE NIGHT where LGBTQ+ people can feel welcomed and safe," some Christians have a problem with it?That's not Christianity. That's bigotry. IN THIS EPISODE: ✅ Why Jaden Ivey's "beliefs" are actually harmful ✅ The difference between beliefs and bigotry ✅ How the Bible was used to justify slavery and segregation ✅ What Jesus actually said about loving marginalized people ✅ Why Christians who obsess over LGBTQ+ people might be struggling themselves ✅ A challenge to Christians: Go to Pride Night and meet real people ✅ Why "loving the sinner, hating the sin" is still hate QUOTES FROM THIS EPISODE: "When your beliefs start to take away the human rights of other people, they are no longer beliefs. You are just a homophobic and hateful bigot." "You are not earning any brownie points with God for hating on people." "Stop being narcissistic and thinking that you have all the answers. You are a sinner yourself, and God had mercy on you—so have mercy on others." RESOURCES: 📖 Download the FREE LGBTQ+ Healing and Resource Guide: 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🏳️‍🌈 Crisis Support: The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 (24/7 crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth)PFLAG: Support for parents, families, friends, and allies of LGBTQ+ peopleQ Christian Fellowship: Community for LGBTQ+ Christians 💜 Support the Mission: If this podcast has helped you, please consider donating to help us expand our reach and support more LGBTQ+ individuals navigating faith and identity. 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth FOLLOW YOU CAN BE BOTH: 📸 Instagram: [@youcanbeboth] 🎵 TikTok: [@youcanbeboth] 🎙️ Podcast: Search "You Can Be Both" wherever you listen FOLLOW LAUREN LANZARETTA: 📸 Instagram: [@laurenlanzaretta] 🎵 TikTok: [@laurenlanzaretta] 🌐 Website: laurenlanzaretta.com SHARE THIS MESSAGE: 💬 Know a Christian who needs to hear this? Share this video. 💬 Know an LGBTQ+ person hurt by comments like Jaden's? Send them this. 🔔 Subscribe so you never miss an episode. 👍 Leave a comment—I read every single one. You don't have to choose between your faith and loving LGBTQ+ people. You can be both. UPCOMING: 🎥 Testimony Tuesdays — Live testimonies every Tuesday on YouTube 📱 Community App — The largest community of LGBTQ+ people of faith in the world (coming soon!) 📞 One-on-One Calls — Personal support for your faith journey (launching soon!) A NOTE TO VIEWERS: If you're a Christian struggling with LGBTQ+ acceptance, I get it. I used to be homophobic too when I was in the closet. But I challenge you: stop othering people. Look at LGBTQ+ individuals as human beings loved by God who deserve respect and dignity. If you're LGBTQ+ and you've been hurt by Christians like Jaden Ivey, please know: You are not unrighteous. You are not an enemy of God. You are loved, valued, and worthy exactly as you are. #JadenIvey #PrideNight #NBA #ChicagoBulls #GayChristian #LGBTQChurch #ChristianLGBTQ #Homophobia #ChristianAthlete #PrideControversy #LGBTQRights #ChristianResponse #YouCanBeBoth #LaurenLanzaretta #QueerFaith #ReligiousTrauma #ChurchHurt #LGBTQTestimony #ChristianAlly #ProgressiveChristianity #AffirmingChristianity

    14 min

  5. 5 APR

    America's Got Talent Contestant Comes Out As Gay After Leading Worship in Megachurches for Years

    "I was a worship leader who sang about God's love every Sunday—while hiding who I really was. "In this powerful episode of You Can Be Both, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Israel Isaac, a longtime megachurch worship leader who came out as gay four years ago and recently auditioned for America's Got Talent and appears on Bravo's Vanderpump Rules. For years, Israel led thousands of people in worship—pouring his heart into every song, every service, every moment on stage. But he was living a double life. He was gay, and he knew if anyone found out, everything would change. When Israel came out just four years ago, it cost him everything he knew—his church, his community, his sense of belonging. But it also gave him something he'd never had before: freedom. In this honest and vulnerable conversation, Israel shares his journey of growing up gay in the church, the pain of hiding, the courage it took to come out, and what happened when he finally stepped into his truth. From leading worship in front of 10,000 people to standing on the America's Got Talent stage and now appearing on Vanderpump Rules, Israel's story is proof that you don't have to choose between your faith and your identity. If you've ever felt like you had to hide who you are to be loved, this episode is for you. IN THIS EPISODE: ✅ Growing up gay in a religious community ✅ What it's like to lead worship while closeted ✅ Coming out four years ago and how it changed everything ✅ How the church responded ✅ Israel's journey to America's Got Talent ✅ Being on Bravo's Vanderpump Rules ✅ Finding self-acceptance and freedom ✅ Why you don't have to choose between faith and identity RESOURCES: 📖 Download the FREE LGBTQ+ Healing and Resource Guide: 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🏳️‍🌈 Crisis Support: The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 (24/7 crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth) GLAAD: Resources for LGBTQ+ Christians 💜 Support the Mission: If this podcast has helped you, please consider donating to help us expand our reach and support more LGBTQ+ individuals navigating faith and identity. 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth FOLLOW YOU CAN BE BOTH: 📸 Instagram: [@youcanbeboth] 🎵 TikTok: [@youcanbeboth] 🎙️ Podcast: Search "You Can Be Both" wherever you listen FOLLOW LAUREN LANZARETTA: 📸 Instagram: [@laurenlanzaretta] 🎵 TikTok: [@laurenlanzaretta] 🌐 Website: laurenlanzaretta.com SHARE THIS MESSAGE: 💬 Know someone who needs to hear Israel's story? Share this episode with them. 🔔 Subscribe so you never miss a story of hope and healing. 👍 Leave a comment—your story matters. You don't have to choose between your truth and your faith. You can be both. #ComingOut #LGBTQChurch #WorshipLeader #ChristianLGBTQ #QueerFaith #AmericasGotTalent #AGT #VanderpumpRules #ComingOutStory #GayAndChristian #ChurchHurt #ReligiousTrauma #LGBTQYouth #QueerStories #FaithJourney #LGBTQTestimony #YouCanBeBoth #ChristianCommunity #QueerWorship #LGBTQAcceptance #LaurenLanzaretta #ProgressiveChristianity #AffirmingChurch #IsraelIsaac #BravoTV #comingoutstory

    59 min

  6. 29 MAR

    This Lesbian Harvard Grad Exposes the Problem With Modern Christianity

    What happens when a Harvard Divinity School graduate, public theologian and gardening philosopher sits down with an LGBTQ Christian podcast host for over an hour of raw, unfiltered conversation about faith, sexuality, race, the church and what it means to truly know God? This. This episode happens. Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Ciarra Jones — known as the Gardening Theologian — for one of the most thought-provoking, theologically rich and deeply personal conversations the You Can Be Both podcast has ever had. Ciarra is a writer, speaker and public theologian who helps people untangle inherited beliefs and cultivate a faith that is rooted, liberated and alive. In this episode, Lauren and Ciarra explore: 🌱 Growing up Black in all-white California towns — and what that teaches you about systems of power 📖 How Ciarra's parents' divorce led her into fundamentalist Christianity — and what it took to find her way out 🏳️‍🌈 What the church gets wrong about LGBTQ identity — and what a more expansive faith looks like ✝️ The difference between a punishing God and a gentle God — and who benefits from each 🌿 How gardening became a spiritual practice and a theological framework 💬 Ex-gay theology, deconstruction, inherited belief systems and what it means to truly be free Ciarra's closing message will stay with you: What does a gentle God look like — and what does that God offer us? This episode is for anyone who has ever felt like their faith and their identity couldn't coexist. You can be both. 🌱 FOLLOW CIARRA JONES: Instagram & TikTok: @TheGardeningTheologianPodcast: The Community Garden Podcast/Substack: The Gardening Theologian 📥 FREE LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide — Lauren's full testimony plus every book, podcast and voice that helped her move from shame to freedom: 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: 🍎 Apple Music: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 🎧 Spotify: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" ▶️ YouTube: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 📲 FOLLOW LAUREN: Instagram: @LaurenLanzarettaTikTok: @LaurenLanzaretta YouTube: Lauren Lanzaretta 💛 LOVE THIS PODCAST? HERE'S HOW YOU CAN HELP: This podcast exists to remind every LGBTQ person of faith that they are not alone — and it reaches people because of YOU. ✅ Like this video — it tells the algorithm this conversation matters ✅ Leave a comment — share what resonated, ask a question, say hi ✅ Share this episode with one person who needs to hear it — a friend, a family member, someone still struggling in silence ✅ Subscribe so you never miss a Sunday episode 💛 Consider donating to help us expand this mission and reach more people who feel alone — every contribution helps us keep going and grow: https://account.venmo.com/u/youcanbeboth You are not confused. You are not broken. You are not too much. You can be both. #YouCanBeBoth #LGBTQChristian #GardeningTheologian #CiarraJones #LaurenLanzaretta #FaithAndSexuality #QueerChristian #Deconstruction #ChristianPodcast #LGBTQFaith #HarvardDivinity #BlackChristian #GentleGod #FaithAndPride #LGBTQHealing

    1hr 19min

  7. 22 MAR

    Christian Parents: How to Love Your LGBTQ Child Without Losing Your Faith

    What happens when a deeply Christian mom learns her daughter is gay — while sitting in a rainy parking lot before school? In this powerful episode of the You Can Be Both Podcast, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Staci Frenes — singer, songwriter, author and Christian mom — who shares the raw, emotional moment her daughter Abby came out to her at 16, and the years-long journey that followed as she learned to hold onto both her faith and her child. Staci's latest book, Love Makes Room, is a memoir about how she expanded her faith to fully embrace her daughter's LGBTQ+ identity — without letting go of God. This conversation is for every LGBTQ person who has feared coming out to their parents, and every parent who is trying to find their way.In this episode: 🏳️‍🌈 The moment Staci's daughter came out — and how she responded 🙏 How a conservative Christian mom reconciled her faith with her child's identity 💔 The two years of pain before Abby could say the words out loud ❤️ What Staci wants every LGBTQ person — and every parent — to hear 📖 How her book Love Makes Room is giving families a third way forward 📥 FREE LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide — includes Lauren's full testimony and every book, podcast and voice that helped her move from shame to freedom: 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 📖 Get Staci's book Love Makes Room — available on Amazon and everywhere books are sold: https://amzn.to/4t1zk2Q 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: 🍎 Apple Music: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 🎧 Spotify: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" ▶️ YouTube: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 📲 FOLLOW LAUREN: Instagram: @Lanzaretta TikTok: @Lanzaretta YouTube: Lauren Lanzaretta 💬 If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear that they are not confused, not broken, not too much — and that they can be both. #YouCanBeBoth #LGBTQChristian #ChristianMom #LGBTQFaith #ComingOut #LoveMakesRoom #LaurenLanzaretta #ChristianPodcast #LGBTQHealing #FaithAndPride #ComingOutStory #ChristianParents #LGBTQParents #Affirming

    1hr 8min

  8. 15 MAR

    Separating God's Love From the Hate You Were Taught in Church

    Have you ever wondered if God actually loves you — or if the hate you've heard from others is the truth? In this solo episode of You Can Be Both, host Lauren Lanzaretta takes a break from guests to speak directly to her community about one of the most important questions LGBTQ people of faith wrestle with: does God love me, exactly as I am?Lauren reads a powerful listener testimony from a woman who grew up Amish, survived years of sexual abuse, came out as a lesbian, and found her way back to God — and uses it to explore how we separate a loving God from the painful messages we've received from religion and family. This episode is for anyone who has been told they're going to hell, who has walked away from their faith because of shame, or who is quietly wondering if there's still a place for them at God's table. There is.Lauren also shares exciting updates on what's coming for the You Can Be Both community — including a private community app, one-on-one mentoring calls, live retreats, and monthly group Zoom calls.In this episode:-A moving listener testimony about surviving abuse, coming out, and returning to faith-How to separate God's love from hateful religious messaging-Why your relationship with God as an LGBTQ person is powerful — not disqualified-A prayer over every person listening this week-Exciting community updates including a private app, mentoring calls, and live eventsFree LGBTQ Healing and Resource Guide — including Lauren's full testimony and every book, podcast, and voice that helped her move from shame to freedom — https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth📧 Sign up for community updates and be the first to know when the app launches: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeJWqrj3WinN-Li_TqY3RtMc8L3WTUw9jCikDQ6NPtyjOlAJg/viewform💛 If this podcast has helped you, consider sharing it with someone who needs it — or donating to help this message reach people still struggling in silence.Find Lauren's music on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Music — search Lauren Lanzaretta📲 Follow You Can Be Both:Instagram | TikTok | YouTubeNew episodes every Sunday at 11 a.m.

    34 min
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About

You Can Be Both is hosted by singer/songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, who shares honest conversations about being both gay and Christian—two identities often seen as incompatible. The podcast creates space for LGBTQ+ people of faith to find healing, community, and a deeper connection with Christ while fully embracing who they are. As a first step to your healing journey, I recommend the “LGBTQ+ Healing & Resource Guide” - go to www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth Send testimony/questions to https://bit.ly/49G1tpz

Information

  • Creator
    Lauren Lanzaretta
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    27
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Lauren Lanzaretta
  • Show Website
    You Can Be Both

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