The Modern Leadership Coaching Podcast

Marc & Teresa Hildebrand
  • 4.8 (100)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Weekly

Modern Leadership Coaching is where Marc and Teresa Hildebrand, a 20-year LAPD Sergeant and a former UCLA Health executive, help driven people get out of their own way and reach their next level. Real conversations about what actually holds people back, how to get your own thinking working for you instead of against you, and how to show up as who you know you can be in your business, your family, and your life. Want to go deeper? Start our free series on leading yourself through anything at https://www.modernleadership.us/lead New episodes weekly.

  1. 4d ago

    What If Your Real Problem Is Not Your Tactics, But Your Thinking?

    Send us Fan Mail You’ve probably felt it before: you did the course, earned the certification, sat through the workshop, took the notes and then the first real moment arrived and you still felt unprepared. That disconnect is not a character flaw, and it’s not proof you’re “bad at leadership.” It’s usually a training problem: you were taught tactics and steps, but not how to think when the situation is unclear, emotional, and moving fast. Marc shares a blunt lesson from his LAPD days. After nearly 1,000 hours in the police academy, he walked into the streets feeling clueless, not because the training was bad, but because it focused on what to do without building the skill underneath it: real-time judgment. We talk about why field training officers function like coaches, how they shape decision-making, and why “common sense” disappears when you’re in uncommon scenarios. Then we bridge it to business coaching, entrepreneurship, fitness, and personal growth, where the internet can hand you infinite tactics but almost no one teaches you how high performers think. We also dig into “thinking on purpose.” Instead of running old stories from your past on autopilot, we break down how to spot them, reframe them, and practice new perspectives until they become your default. Teresa shares how this showed up in hospital sustainability leadership, where influence and buy-in matter as much as practical skills, especially when you face pushback from busy teams. If you’re ready to stop tactic-hopping and start building true self-leadership, listen now. Then subscribe, share this with a friend who’s leveling up, and leave a review with the biggest thinking shift you’re taking from the conversation. If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  2. Oct 19

    Four Levels Of Self-Coaching: The Self-Leadership Ladder

    Send us Fan Mail Looking to lead yourself effectively?  Sign up for our free Monday October 19th workshop, "It's Not a Discipline Problem: modernleadership.us/workshop You can be rock solid in one area of life and totally derailed in another, and it has nothing to do with “willpower.” Marc and Teresa map out a clear self-coaching framework that explains why: the four levels of self-coaching, which we also call the four levels of self-leadership. Once you can name the level you’re operating from, you can stop guessing and start changing your patterns on purpose. We walk through each level in plain language. Level one is blame aimed outward, where you feel stuck because the solution is always someone else changing. Level two is the brutal one: you know what you should have done, but only after the moment has passed, so you default to guilt, self-criticism, and “why am I like this?” Level three is the turning point where you catch yourself mid-reaction, interrupt the pattern, reframe, and choose your A game. Level four is the goal: self-leadership becomes identity, your habits feel automatic, and you get your brain space back. We also get practical about how people actually move up levels: building awareness of your internal dialogue, taking real ownership, getting an outside spotter, using a repeatable coaching framework, and getting feedback and reps until it sticks. You’ll hear Teresa’s personal health journey, plus why your environment can either accelerate growth or quietly pull you backward. Ready to apply it fast? Rate yourself 1 to 4 in health, relationships, career, and parenting, then bring the one that matters most to you to the workshop! Subscribe, share this with a high performer you care about, and leave a review so more people can learn to lead themselves when life gets hard. If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  3. Oct 12

    When to Lead and When to Listen

    Send us Fan Mail Someone brings you a problem and your brain lights up with the perfect answer. That moment feels like leadership, but it is often the fastest way to lose trust, miss the real issue, and train people to stop coming to you at all. Marc and Teresa unpack how strong leaders choose between leading and listening, and why the secret is not a better script for guiding others but better self-leadership in the heat of a conversation.  We walk through the three “hats” most of us wear without noticing: the cheerleader, the fixer-mentor, and the coach. You will hear why cheerleading can create dependence, why mentoring too early turns people into carbon copies, and why coaching questions work only when they are intentional and grounded. We also dig into psychological safety, workplace communication, and the hidden layers beneath common complaints like “I need more clients” or “I do not have time.” Often the real constraint is 10 steps earlier than the story someone leads with.  You will leave with a practical framework: start with curiosity, ask more questions than you think you need, then earn the right to mentor by asking permission, and finally bring encouragement that reflects what you actually observed. We also share a weekly stretch you can try immediately: ask one more question before you answer and notice the urge to jump in and fix. If this helps, subscribe, share it with a leader who gives advice too fast, and leave us a review with the question you are going to ask first. Learn more about the Self-Leadership Lab here: modernleadership.us/lab If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  4. Oct 5

    The Thing You Keep Talking Yourself Out Of

    Send us Fan Mail Your brain is amazing at one thing that can quietly wreck your progress: it can take the exact action that would help you and file it under “danger,” “too much,” or “not worth it.” We dig into that mislabeling pattern and why it shows up as perfectly reasonable logic like I don’t have time, I’m too tired, or I can’t risk it right now, even when the truth is that the choice you’re avoiding is the breakthrough. Marc shares a simple fitness example that most of us have lived: skipping exercise to “save energy,” then realizing movement is what creates energy, focus, and better days. From there we zoom out to business growth, leadership development, and personal development, especially the shift from a trade-time-for-money mindset to an entrepreneur mindset built on skills, capacity, and long-term compounding. If you keep waiting for the perfect moment or guaranteed payoff, your brain stays “safe” while your life stays the same. We also get practical with tools you can use immediately. We talk about asking better questions to challenge self-sabotage, defining return on investment as something you own, and learning to extract universal principles from any room whether it fits your background or not. We even reframe the “is this selfish?” hesitation by asking a bigger question: what does this give to your kids, your partner, your team, or the people who count on you? If you want to build self-leadership skills with real structure, we’re running a free workshop for the Self-Leadership Lab so you can see what it’s like. Grab a spot at modernleadership.us/workshop, then subscribe, share this with someone who’s carrying a lot, and leave a review so more leaders can find the show. If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  5. Sep 28

    The Things You Can't See

    Send us Fan Mail The most dangerous obstacles in leadership aren’t the ones you can name, they’re the ones you keep calling “just the way I am”. Marc and Teresa open up a different kind of conversation: a live “spotter” style walkthrough where we practice noticing the hidden beliefs and subconscious filters that quietly shape how we lead, communicate, and make decisions. We start with why blind spots are so hard to see from the inside. Your brain is built to protect you, so it turns old assumptions into “facts” and then drives your behavior on autopilot. That shows up everywhere, from work to marriage to parenting, especially when stress is high. Self-leadership means learning to notice that invisible story and choosing a better one, but it also means admitting you may need outside perspective to see what you’re missing. Then we run three real-world scenarios. A supervisor repeats the same feedback and assumes the employee doesn’t care, when the real issue might be clarity, confidence, perfectionism, missing access, or a communication gap. A high performer says yes, regrets it, and can’t explain why, revealing scarcity, fear of missing out, and people pleasing patterns. And the “smooth meeting” leader who avoids the elephant in the room goes home frustrated, teaching others what’s acceptable while losing energy and trust. If you want to lead yourself well and become the kind of person who can navigate any challenge, not just the one in front of you, this conversation gives you a practical lens to start. Subscribe, share this with a leader who needs it, and leave a review with the blind spot you’re working on right now. For more information about the Self-Leadership Lab, visit: modernleadership.us/lab  If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  6. Sep 21

    When You're the One Everybody Comes To

    Send us Fan Mail Everyone keeps bringing you the same problems and part of you is proud, and part of you is tired. We dig into why that happens and why it often has less to do with other people “dumping” on you and more to do with a leadership superpower you’ve been underestimating. We start with a deceptively small mindset shift that changes everything: the questions you ask in your own head. “Why do I have to be the one?” creates resentment on demand. “Why am I the right person for this?” creates clarity, ownership, and even gratitude. From there, we explore why people come to you based on what they see you do consistently, how you show up under pressure, how you communicate, and how you initiate action when others stall. We also separate the adaptive challenge from the technical challenge. The adaptive work is recognising your strength and choosing to lean into it with intention. The technical work is building an environment where you can reach up and reach out, not only reach down. If you are always supporting others but never getting support yourself, burnout is predictable. We connect that to coaching, modern leadership, and the idea of being proof of your product by applying your skills at work, at home, and in your own inner dialogue. Finally, we talk about the difference between leadership and dependency. Being the go to person is not the end goal. The real win is using your superpower to teach others to step up, build their own skills, and carry the load with you. If you’ve been feeling stretched, this will help you lead with more impact and less resentment. Subscribe, share this with the go to person in your life, and leave a review with the biggest insight you’re taking into your week. If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  7. Sep 14

    When Your Plan Stops Working

    Send us Fan Mail Your plan didn’t fail because you lacked grit. Sometimes the plan is simply finished, and the real work is admitting it before you waste another year trying to “push through” a plateau that won’t budge. We dig into what to do when you’ve been executing, learning, and showing up like a high performer, yet the results stall. We break down a core self leadership principle we teach our clients: you can’t control outcomes, but you can control inputs, including how you show up, the actions you take, and the energy you bring to the work. From there, we explore the uncomfortable line between making smart adjustments and recognizing the plan is actually over. Marc shares the long arc from early success in MLM to years of plateau, the emotional storm of feeling like he was letting people down, and the pivot into coaching that changed everything. We also talk about the trap of “spinning” fueled by forced positivity, why tying goals to one specific path can blind you to better opportunities, and how to process a potential pivot without making a fear-based, heat-of-the-moment decision. If you feel the inkling that something needs to change, let this be the nudge to get honest, stay attached to the goal, and loosen your grip on the plan. Subscribe for more leadership coaching conversations, share this with a friend who’s stuck in a plateau, and leave a review with the biggest plan you’re ready to rethink. If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

  8. Sep 7

    When Life Gets Hard

    Send us Fan Mail Life can hit hard without warning, but the part that drains us most is often what happens next in our own head. We talk about those moments when life is lifing and the challenge is real, yet the suffering multiplies because we start asking terrible questions, slipping into victim mode, and letting one problem spill into every corner of our day. If you have ever thought “this always happens” and felt your patience shrink at home and at work, you will recognise the pattern immediately.  We break down the idea that life is 50-50, and why our real job as leaders is to stop making the hard parts harder. We share the signs we watch for when our energy is tanking, how rumination quietly becomes the amplifier, and why going into isolation is the opposite of what actually helps. You will hear the practical reframe we use to move from “what is broken” to “how can I be effective right now,” plus why having a coach matters when your brain is convinced it is protecting you.  We also make a clear distinction between pain and suffering. Pain is the normal emotional hit that comes from a hard event and the thoughts it triggers. Suffering is the replay loop, the story you keep telling, and the feeling that you have no control. The takeaway is simple and powerful: you have choice in what you focus on, and that choice changes your energy, your creativity, and your leadership. If you want extra support, we mention our workshop at modernleadership.us/forward slash workshop. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find the show. And you're invited to watch our recent workshop, How to Find the Real Problem (In Yourself and the People You Lead): https://modernleadership.us/workshop If you’ve been listening to us talk about self-leadership and you’re ready to take the next step, enrollment is now open for the Self-Leadership Lab! We begin November 2, and we’re limiting this group to just 15 participants. You can learn more about the program and secure your spot at modernleadership.us/lab. And if you’re newer to the podcast, or you’re curious about the Lab but aren’t quite sure whether it’s right for you, we also have a replay of our free self-leadership workshop available. It’s an opportunity to experience how we teach and work through real-life challenges before making a decision. Just reach out to us and ask for the workshop replay. We’ll be happy to share it! Either way, we’d love to help you take that next step toward becoming a more effective leader.

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4.8
out of 5
100 Ratings

About

Modern Leadership Coaching is where Marc and Teresa Hildebrand, a 20-year LAPD Sergeant and a former UCLA Health executive, help driven people get out of their own way and reach their next level. Real conversations about what actually holds people back, how to get your own thinking working for you instead of against you, and how to show up as who you know you can be in your business, your family, and your life. Want to go deeper? Start our free series on leading yourself through anything at https://www.modernleadership.us/lead New episodes weekly.

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