30 episodes

Do you love violently plundering dungeons of their treasure, but tire of all that "surviving" and "actually living to see another day" crap that other games are full of? Do you long for a good old meat grinder like ol' Pappy ran Way Back When(TM)? Do you find more joy in looting the bodies of your fallen companions than actually defeating monsters? Do you have a deep, passionate love for save-or-die traps like Murder Ceilings, Lava Parties, Guillotine Helmets, and Goblin Bombs? Well then my friend, HAMMERCRAWL! is just what you need!

HAMMERCRAWL! is a brutally hilarious dungeon crawl experience. In this Actual Play RPG podcast, your host and Dungeon Master N. Phillip Cole (aka NPC) guides a group of randomly-generated characters to their inevitable demise within a completely procedurally-generated dungeon of horrors and comedy. HAMMERCRAWL! uses a game system inspired by "classic" older games to make an experience both enjoyable by veterans and complete newbies alike. Everything involved is 100% spontaneous, using a collection of random generators to create a completely unique and unexpected dungeon romp. Join us for a pure meat grinder experience just like the days of yore, with stacks of nameless characters to burn through, and a rip roaring good time doing so. Stop by the Rusty Dagger Tavern, quaff your tankards of potent dwarven ale, and then sit around the table with us to Delve into the Depths of Doom-Damned Dungeons of Darkest Darkness.

HAMMERCRAWL! N. Phillip Cole

    • Games
    • 4.3 • 3 Ratings

Do you love violently plundering dungeons of their treasure, but tire of all that "surviving" and "actually living to see another day" crap that other games are full of? Do you long for a good old meat grinder like ol' Pappy ran Way Back When(TM)? Do you find more joy in looting the bodies of your fallen companions than actually defeating monsters? Do you have a deep, passionate love for save-or-die traps like Murder Ceilings, Lava Parties, Guillotine Helmets, and Goblin Bombs? Well then my friend, HAMMERCRAWL! is just what you need!

HAMMERCRAWL! is a brutally hilarious dungeon crawl experience. In this Actual Play RPG podcast, your host and Dungeon Master N. Phillip Cole (aka NPC) guides a group of randomly-generated characters to their inevitable demise within a completely procedurally-generated dungeon of horrors and comedy. HAMMERCRAWL! uses a game system inspired by "classic" older games to make an experience both enjoyable by veterans and complete newbies alike. Everything involved is 100% spontaneous, using a collection of random generators to create a completely unique and unexpected dungeon romp. Join us for a pure meat grinder experience just like the days of yore, with stacks of nameless characters to burn through, and a rip roaring good time doing so. Stop by the Rusty Dagger Tavern, quaff your tankards of potent dwarven ale, and then sit around the table with us to Delve into the Depths of Doom-Damned Dungeons of Darkest Darkness.

    Ep030: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 3: Definitely Cat Magic

    Ep030: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 3: Definitely Cat Magic

    WOO HOO, NATALIE IS BACK! We missed her greatly, and are super extra ULTRA DRAGON PUNCH EDITION* happy to have her join us again for HAMMERCRAWL! This episode is our third recording session of the ongoing new DUNGEON FULL OF MONSTERS! In this installment of the adventures of THE CRIMSON THORNS, we learn that feline mysteries are afoot, indeed. A new party member joins the crew after a brief visit back to town, and the party gets there, aha, fingers in more than one Chaos Pie...


    Oh yeah: do you like mimes? I hope you like mimes. This episode's got mimes, miming mightily.


    * The one with the pre-order bonus of an alternate hide color for Vovine the Bovine, of course.


    Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.


    Links of Note:



    The Dungeon Full of Monsters
    The Garbage Goons
    The Donjon: your one-stop site for all things random
    Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
    The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
    Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
    Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright


    Credits:



    HAMMERSMITH: NPC
    Players: Lady Coquine as "Pepper Graveworm," Scott as "Roland Cockfinger," The Mad Marquis as "Arthictor," Kylee as "Inky Kowalski", Natalie as "Brienne McKnight"
    Group Name: The Crimson Thorns
    Dungeon: Skull Mountain (The Dungeon Full of Monsters)
    Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
    Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
    Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
    Daily Wisdom: Just fill that clam with some chaos kombucha, throw in a severed chaos leg, and hope for the best!


    Episode Length: 02:34:01 (we support Chapter Marks!)


    Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!


    Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/ced2cc2a-fb4f-4582-a6f5-97893c65ddaa


    This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

    • 2 hr 34 min
    Ep029: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 2: Two Mollusks and a Dwarf

    Ep029: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 2: Two Mollusks and a Dwarf

    Our special new extended campaign continues with its second session, here on the HAMMERCRAWL! comedic dungeon crawl podcast! While our process is usually 100% generated on the fly through a mix of improv and quick-draw cards, for this campaign we're using the wonderful DUNGEON FULL OF MONSTERS (by Johnstone Metzger) as the underlying dungeon into which our probably-doomed adventurers are delving. Will Spandrel's will bring order to this chaotic cesspit of evil? Will anyone manage to escape with their limbs intact? Tune in and find out!


    Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.


    Links of Note:



    The Dungeon Full of Monsters
    The Donjon: your one-stop site for all things random
    Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
    The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
    Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
    Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright


    Credits:



    HAMMERSMITH: NPC
    Players: Lady Coquine as "Pepper Graveworm," Scott as "Roland Cockfinger," The Mad Marquis as "Arthictor," Kylee as "Inky Kowalski"
    Group Name: The Crimson Thorns
    Dungeon: Skull Mountain (The Dungeon Full of Monsters)
    Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
    Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
    Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
    Daily Wisdom: When confronted with a pool of shimmering dungeon LSD, you drink that shit.


    Episode Length: 02:37:17 (we support Chapter Marks!)


    Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!


    Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/8301cf76-4182-481f-a9f2-d1a1373f3b98


    This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

    • 2 hr 37 min
    Ep028: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 1: That Garlic-Flesh Smell

    Ep028: Dungeon Full of Monsters Part 1: That Garlic-Flesh Smell

    Welcome to the beginning of a whole new adventure on the HAMMERCRAWL! comedic dungeon crawl podcast! As always, every aspect of our play is randomly generated via a mix of random tables, inspirational cards, and pure unfiltered improvisation. This time, however, we're changing things up a bit by taking a stab at an actual published dungeon: the excellent DUNGEON FULL OF MONSTERS by Johnstone Metzger! This dungeon is a perfect component for HAMMERCRAWL!-style gaming, as the entire structure and flow of it is driven by its own random tables, right down to how the very dungeon rooms are assembled.


    Starting with this episode we're also switching to a full-session release format. This means each episode will encapsulate an entire play session, resulting in longer episodes that listeners can digest at their own leisure. The files are a tad longer, and the releases will be spaced out by a couple of weeks as a result.


    Anyway, we have an excellent cast of players once again, and hope you enjoy listening to our chaotic adventures as much as we enjoyed rolling them!


    Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.


    Links of Note:



    The Dungeon Full of Monsters
    The Donjon: your one-stop site for all things random
    Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
    The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
    Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
    Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright


    Credits:



    HAMMERSMITH: NPC
    Players: Lady Coquine as "Pepper Graveworm," Scott as "Roland Cockfinger," The Mad Marquis as "Arthictor," Kylee as "Inky Kowalski"
    Group Name: The Crimson Thorns
    Dungeon: Skull Mountain (The Dungeon Full of Monsters)
    Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
    Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
    Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
    Daily Wisdom: With a shovel and a dwarf, you pretty much know where you are at any time.


    Episode Length: 02:33:43 (we support Chapter Marks!)


    Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!


    Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/f7ca265e-dcdc-4ae9-88f4-037b1b0dcc01


    This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

    • 2 hr 33 min
    Ep027: Gamestorm 2019 Part 3: Feelings are Healthy

    Ep027: Gamestorm 2019 Part 3: Feelings are Healthy

    The Gamestorm 2019 live event recording now concludes in the third and final part of this saga. This three-parter was recorded at the Gamestorm convention this past March, right here in Portland, Oregon. As with all of our convention and one-shot gaming events, this game was played "hot seat" style, with new players rotating in every time a party member died in the dungeon. It's always a roaring good time, and this event was no exception! So we hope you enjoy yet another delve into the randomly-generated insanity of HAMMERCRAWL!


    Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.


    Links of Note:



    Gamestorm Convention
    Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
    The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
    Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
    Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright


    Credits:



    HAMMERSMITH: NPC
    Players: Sara McNaughton as "Belinda Carbuckle", Aaron Bowman as "Alousicious Wrinklesnort Esq. III", Matt Buckley as "Missy", Rodney as "Bellatronixx the Magna-Focused", Tom as "Odell Lourapple", Paula as "All Might", Brandon as "Honko the Glorious", Dan as "Shanghai Sally", and Tyson as "Helga Cruciform"
    Group Name: The Fangs of Hodeitsir
    Dungeon: The Dungeon of Democratic Necromancy
    Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
    Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
    Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
    Daily Wisdom: When both of the berzerkers in your party get that red-eyed stare, it's time to run far, far away...


    Episode Length: 30:07 (we support Chapter Marks!)


    Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!


    Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/db555cd4-dbe3-4630-b657-a9cd0e40266d


    This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

    • 30 min
    Ep026: Gamestorm 2019 Part 2: The Bone Golem Hates Cats

    Ep026: Gamestorm 2019 Part 2: The Bone Golem Hates Cats

    The Gamestorm 2019 live event recording continues in part two! This three-parter was recorded at the Gamestorm convention this past March, right here in Portland, Oregon. As with all of our convention and one-shot gaming events, this game was played "hot seat" style, with new players rotating in every time a party member died in the dungeon. It's always a roaring good time, and this event was no exception! So we hope you enjoy yet another delve into the randomly-generated insanity of HAMMERCRAWL!


    Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.


    Links of Note:



    Gamestorm Convention
    Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
    The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
    Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
    Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright


    Credits:



    HAMMERSMITH: NPC
    Players: Sara McNaughton as "Belinda Carbuckle", Aaron Bowman as "Alousicious Wrinklesnort Esq. III", Matt Buckley as "Missy", Rodney as "Bellatronixx the Magna-Focused", Tom as "Odell Lourapple", Paula as "All Might", Brandon as "Honko the Glorious", Dan as "Shanghai Sally", and Tyson as "Helga Cruciform"
    Group Name: The Fangs of Hodeitsir
    Dungeon: The Dungeon of Democratic Necromancy
    Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
    Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
    Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
    Daily Wisdom: In a pinch, tying a live cat to your face can make for an excellent poison gas filter.


    Episode Length: 54:31 (we support Chapter Marks!)


    Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!


    Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/aef37181-334f-4849-a45a-513c5c8b1379


    This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

    • 54 min
    Ep025: Gamestorm 2019 Part 1: The Bacon was a Lie

    Ep025: Gamestorm 2019 Part 1: The Bacon was a Lie

    Welcome adventurers to another set of special live recordings! This time around, we're bringing you a three-parter recorded at the Gamestorm convention this past March, right here in Portland, Oregon. As with all of our convention and one-shot gaming events, this game was played "hot seat" style, with new players rotating in every time a party member died in the dungeon. It's always a roaring good time, and this event was no exception! So we hope you enjoy yet another delve into the randomly-generated insanity of HAMMERCRAWL!


    Drop us a line! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram as "Breakfastpuppy" or email NPC directly as NPC at Breakfastpuppies dot com. We have a Discord Channel and a Facebook Page, too! And let us know your thoughts by leaving a review on iTunes! For even more info and options, check out our main website or our new low-bandwidth alternative feed site.


    Links of Note:



    Gamestorm Convention
    Dungeon Cartography Cards from Undercity Games
    The GameMaster's Apprentice Cards by Larcenous Designs
    Monster Mod Cards by Fatbelly Press
    Encounter Building Cards (Traps & Locations) by Eric Bright


    Credits:



    HAMMERSMITH: NPC
    Players: Sara McNaughton as "Belinda Carbuckle", Aaron Bowman as "Alousicious Wrinklesnort Esq. III", Matt Buckley as "Missy", Rodney as "Bellatronixx the Magna-Focused", Tom as "Odell Lourapple", Paula as "All Might", Brandon as "Honko the Glorious", Dan as "Shanghai Sally", and Tyson as "Helga Cruciform"
    Group Name: The Fangs of Hodeitsir
    Dungeon: The Dungeon of Democratic Necromancy
    Theme Song: "Chain Lightning" by Gygax
    Additional Music by: Erang - Featured song A Majestic Shadow
    Game Rules: Available for free on Github!
    Daily Wisdom: One does not simply Mime one's way out of a dungeon.


    Episode Length: 49:12 (we support Chapter Marks!)


    Want to throw us a tip? Every little bit helps pay the bills! Check us out on Patreon, or instead just follow this link to our Pinecast Tip Jar!


    Send us your feedback online: https://pinecast.com/feedback/hammercrawl/9bb13b12-bd8e-4d90-ac61-8faba1da92c4


    This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

    • 49 min

Customer Reviews

4.3 out of 5
3 Ratings

3 Ratings

The Screg ,

Praise Fairuza Balk!

This is one of the best actual play podcasts out there. The Wolves of Zaramund series is hilarious!

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