Emotional Autoimmunity: Dealing with the emotional issues of chronic illness

Kerry Jeffery
  • 5.0 (41)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Monthly

Chronic illness completely changes your life but nobody talks about or even acknowledges all of the emotional issues that come with it and I'm on a mission to change that. As an award winning coach and therapist living with four autoimmune diseases myself, I know exactly what the issues are and more importantly, how to help you overcome them. From medical gaslighting, dealing with grief and all of the 'what if' thoughts that keep you awake at night, let's talk about the emotional issues of chronic illness and what you can do to help yourself. 

  1. 4d ago

    What does 'getting better' mean?

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text From the moment you become chronically ill, all of the focus is on 'getting better' but what does that mean?  And more importantly, how do you know how much recovery is actually going to be possible for you?  The most common expectation is that 'getting better' means getting back to normal, they way you were before. But getting back to normal and exactly the way you were before may not always be a realistic or achievable goal and even if it is, where do you start? Even figuring out what your options are seems to depend on who you talk to and what they believe can be done to help you and the answers can range from nothing at all to the most complex protocols you can begin to imagine.  In my experience, dealing with the emotions first is the most important step because the impacts of becoming chronically ill are life changing and affect every part of your life.  Dealing with loss of ability and capacity, brain fog, chronic pain and feeling stuck in a body that is now unpredictable and unreliable, brings with it lots of fear, grief, guilt and denial and the intensity of these emotions can feel completely overwhelming.  To start moving forward, we need to find a way to face all of those big feelings of grief and loss without the fear of drowning in them and come out the other side ready to start defining what 'getting better' means for you. In this podcast, I share my experiences and tips for where to start, common issues that can keep you stuck in two different forms of denial and how you can reframe 'getting better' in a more realistic and practical way that doesn't set you up to fail.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    58 min

  2. May 6

    Getting the best therapy and health support for you.

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text In my 13 years of living with chronic illness, almost every single health improvement I've gained has come from fellow patients, rather than Doctors.  Not everything has worked for me but collective patient wisdom and experience and people being so willing to share what's helped and brave enough to blog about it or share it in online groups has made such a world of difference.  But how do you evaluate a potential treatment option?  How do you find the right therapist or coach to help you deal with the often complex emotions that come with chronic illness? How do you tell the difference between 'Gold standard treatment' and Optimal treatment and know which one is going to be better for you?  Find out in this episode of the Emotional Autoimmunity podcast.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    39 min
  3. When someone you love has chronic illness.

    Mar 20

    When someone you love has chronic illness.

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text One of biggest emotional challenges of living with chronic illness is the impacts it can have on your relationships with others.  So many of us living with chronic illness often feel that the people closest to us either don't understand, believe or support what we are going through and how much it has changes our lives and bodies.  Friends can start to fall away, partners can struggle to adapt or know what to do and this only increases feelings of isolation and loneliness because the realities of ongoing, often progressive chronic illness is so rarely talked about or understood.  Partners, friends and family can also feel helpless, lost and overwhelmed, not knowing what to do and feeling unsupported themselves.  Like any major life challenge, the experience of chronic illness can bring us closer together or drive us even further apart. In this podcast, I share practical ways that you can offer help and support and gain some understanding of the issues they are facing if someone you love has chronic illness.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    1h 2m

  4. Feb 4

    Is what I'm feeling normal?

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text If I had to name the one question that almost every person asks me when we start working together, it's this: Is what I'm feeling normal?  This is because there is a complete lack of understanding about what chronic illness is and what the appropriate and normal human emotional responses to becoming chronically ill are.  Often, currently healthy people mistakenly believe that their health and capability is a direct reflection of their choices, actions and thoughts, rather than something that simply happens to them. But the reality is that chronic illness and disability can happen to anyone, at any time through no fault of their own and that no one can be guaranteed health. Yet when we do screw up our courage and try to talk about how we feel and make ourselves vulnerable in doing so, others either dismiss us, blame us, disbelieve us or wrongly think that it's simply an issue of mind over matter or being more positive.  All of that can leave you feeling that it must be a 'you' problem.  That you are just not strong enough or trying hard enough or that everyone else living with your condition is coping so much better than you.  So, lets talk about all of the normal emotional responses to living with chronic illness, what they are, why you feel that way and hopefully, this will leave you feeling a little better in knowing that you are not the only one.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    57 min

  5. Jan 12

    How do you find joy again?

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text How do you find joy again?  Question: It’s been 4 years now with chronic illness and I am so sick of being sick and I know everyone around me is sick of me being sick as well.     I feel like my whole life now is based around managing my symptoms and the exhaustion and the grief of everything I have lost. How can I start to feel some joy again because right now, it feels impossible. When people first start working with me, the things they always list as goals are all of the things that they want less of. Less anxiety, less pain, less overwhelm or grief and it takes a while to start to think about what is it that you want more of or that you want back, instead of all of the things you want less of.  More joy, more peace, being more present and engaged with your life.  More feelings of being connected and having an expanded emotional range so that you can feel so much more than where you feel stuck at the moment.  But a lot of that is going to depend on where you are right now.  So, lets talk about where you can be stuck, what to do when that happens and how you can start cultivating a practice to include more of the things you want, including joy.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    46 min

  6. 07/02/2025

    Chronic illness and Shame

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text Of all the emotional issues that come with chronic illness, the most painful and most damaging is shame. While guilt is about something we have done, shame is about who we are and all of the ways we feel that we are bad, wrong, weak, lacking or 'less than' that make us so very different to everyone else. Especially when we compare ourselves to others who have our illness and who seem to be doing so much better than us.  In this episode I go through the typical kinds of statements and beliefs that you can feel when living with chronic illness, address some of the driving factors that create these feelings and explain why they leave you feeling so full of shame.  Things like:  I feel ashamed because I feel like I am failing to get better. I feel ashamed because I am ruining my families lives. I feel ashamed and embarrassed because I look so different than I did before. If you live with chronic illness and struggle with feelings of shame, then this episode is for you and will help you understand why you feel the way you feel.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    48 min

  7. 06/05/2025

    Ask Kerry Q & A Part 2.

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text I asked my email and social media communities a while back to ask me anything about the experience of chronic illness that they were struggling with to see if I could help and in this episode, I am back with part 2.  I was planning to answer three questions this time but unfortunately, I was running out of energy towards the end of recording and had to leave the last one for now.  I will circle back to it another time as I think that topic deserves it's own podcast and I plan on getting tips and strategies from more seasoned travellers than myself.  In this episode I speak to: How do you deal with a sleepless night or nights? and I'm not doing fun things, like creative stuff because I'm always stuck in the rip tide and just trying to keep my head above water. It's exhausting and depressing.  Have a listen and please share this if it can help your friends or your chronic illness communities.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    46 min

  8. 03/24/2025

    What if they don't believe me?

    Enjoyed this episode? Send Kerry a text By far, the biggest and most upsetting issue for those of us living with chronic illness is not being believed.  From Doctors, family, friends and even total strangers on the internet, there are so many people full of scepticism, unsolicited advice and downright disbelief.  But how do you deal with the questions and comments like: It's all in your head.Why are you still so sick?There must be some Doctor who can fix you.You just need to think more positive.But you look so well.You need to stop letting the illness define you.In this episode I take a deep dive into the basis of other peoples disbelief, how to deal with the comments and judgements and more importantly, what you can do to empower yourself.  Kerry Jeffery is an award winning Coach and Counsellor who specialises in helping clients online around the world with the emotional issues of living with chronic illness and the impacts it has on their lives and relationships. She lives in Melbourne, Australia along with Hashimoto's, Celiac, Antiphospholipid Syndrome and Type 1 Diabetes. Find out more about Kerry and her Therapy programs here. Book your FREE online Discovery Session with Kerry here. Follow Kerry for daily posts on Facebook here.

    57 min
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5
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About

Chronic illness completely changes your life but nobody talks about or even acknowledges all of the emotional issues that come with it and I'm on a mission to change that. As an award winning coach and therapist living with four autoimmune diseases myself, I know exactly what the issues are and more importantly, how to help you overcome them. From medical gaslighting, dealing with grief and all of the 'what if' thoughts that keep you awake at night, let's talk about the emotional issues of chronic illness and what you can do to help yourself. 

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