Creating Her Best Life

Shannan Christiansen
  • 4.9 (84)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to Creating Her Best Life, the go-to podcast for women ready to step into their full potential and design a life they truly love. Hosted by certified Master Life Coach Shannan Christiansen, this inspiring show is tailored for women who seek clarity, empowerment, and actionable strategies to overcome life's challenges and achieve personal and professional success. Each week, Shannan dives into various topics ranging from mindset mastery and goal setting to self-care and relationship building, providing expert insights and practical tools that empower listeners to take bold steps toward their dreams. Whether you're navigating a career shift, building confidence, or looking for ways to enhance your every day life, Creating Her Best Life delivers the guidance you need to thrive. Join our community of ambitious women and discover how to rewrite your story, find your purpose, and create a life you're proud to call your own. Because your best life isn't just a dream, it starts now! To learn more, visit bflycoaching.com.

  1. Aug 5

    Ep. 324 | The Woman Behind the Yes

    Have you ever caught yourself saying yes... when every part of you wanted to say no? People-pleasing isn't always obvious. It doesn't just look like overcommitting or constantly saying yes. Sometimes it looks like staying quiet when you have something to say because you're afraid of being judged. Sometimes it looks like avoiding conflict, apologizing for things that were never your fault, or making yourself smaller just to keep everyone else comfortable. Somewhere along the way, many of us learned that keeping everyone else happy kept us safe. Maybe it kept the peace in your home. Maybe it earned you love, approval, or praise. Maybe you believed it would keep people from leaving or keep you from disappointing someone. Over time, your nervous system learned that if everyone else was okay... then you were okay. But eventually, every yes to everyone else quietly becomes a no to yourself. You don't lose yourself overnight. It happens one small decision at a time. You stop making time for the hobbies that once brought you joy. You stop caring for your body because everyone else's needs come first. You stop dreaming because it feels selfish to want more. In this episode, I'm talking about the woman behind the yes—the version of you that's been trying so hard to be everything for everyone else that you've forgotten how to ask yourself what you actually want. Because real transformation doesn't happen through one giant life-changing moment. It happens through one small choice at a time. One honest conversation. One healthy boundary. One courageous no. One intentional yes. If you've been wondering how to stop repeating these patterns and finally become the woman who chooses herself without guilt, this is exactly the work we're doing inside Becoming Her. Enrollment for Becoming Her: Volume 2 is open through August 28. You can click here to save your spot. Because the life you've always dreamed of isn't built in one giant leap—it's built one intentional decision at a time. And every one of those decisions is a vote for the woman you're becoming.

  2. Jul 30

    Ep. 323 | Your Nervous System Is Not Your Identity

    What if the way you've been reacting isn't who you are... it's simply what your nervous system has learned to do? In this episode, I'm talking about the difference between your identity and your survival responses. Feeling anxious doesn't mean you're an anxious person. Feeling overwhelmed doesn't mean you're weak. So often, we mistake temporary nervous system states for permanent personality traits, and that belief quietly shapes the way we see ourselves. You'll learn why your brain's primary job is to keep you safe, how your nervous system can confuse emotional discomfort with actual danger, and why things like difficult conversations, rejection, change, setting boundaries, or pursuing your goals can trigger fight, flight, freeze, or shutdown responses. We'll also explore the three states many of us move through every day: Activated: Everything feels urgent, overwhelming, and reactive. Disconnected: You feel numb, exhausted, and like you're simply surviving. Connected: You can experience emotions without being controlled by them and respond from intention instead of survival. Rather than asking, "What's wrong with me?" you'll learn to ask a far more powerful question: "What is my nervous system trying to protect me from?" Because the goal isn't to never leave a regulated state. The goal is learning how to return to it more quickly. This week, I want you to simply notice where you are today. Are you activated, disconnected, or connected? Don't rush to fix it. Just notice. Awareness is always the first step toward lasting transformation. Remember: you are not your past, your patterns, or your nervous system. Your identity is rewritten every time you choose awareness over autopilot, compassion over criticism, and connection over survival. If you're ready to stop living in survival mode and start becoming the woman you know you're capable of being, Becoming Her Volume 2 is open for enrollment. I'd love to walk alongside you as you build a life that reflects who you're becoming—not who you've had to be.

  3. Jul 22

    Ep. 322 | Confidence Isn't Something You're Born With

    So many women believe confidence is something you're supposed to have before you take the leap. Before you start the business. Before you speak up. Before you apply. Before you set the boundary. Before you change your life. But that's not how confidence works. In this episode, I'm talking about why confidence is never the starting point—it's the result of repeated action. It's built through evidence, through keeping promises to yourself, and through choosing courage long before you feel ready. We'll unpack why waiting to "feel ready" is keeping you stuck, how self-trust becomes the foundation of lasting confidence, why comparison quietly steals your courage, and how every small action you take strengthens the identity of the woman you're becoming. Because life doesn't ask you to already be her. It asks you to become her. If you've been waiting for confidence to magically show up before you take the next step, this episode is your reminder that courage comes first... confidence comes second. The next brave step isn't waiting for permission. It's waiting for you. And if this conversation resonates with you, Becoming Her: Volume 2 is where we take it even deeper. Together, we'll uncover the beliefs that have been stealing your confidence, rebuild the self-trust you've been missing, and help you become the kind of woman who no longer waits to feel ready before she starts. Because confidence isn't reserved for a lucky few—it's built, one brave decision at a time and available to you.

  4. Jul 15

    Ep. 321 | The Stories That Keep You Small

    The life you're living isn't shaped only by what has happened to you. It's shaped by the story you've been telling yourself about what happened. Somewhere along the way, many of us turned difficult moments into lifelong identities. I'm not confident. I always quit. I'm too old. I'm terrible at relationships. I never finish what I start. The problem isn't just the thought, it's what happens when it becomes the lens through which you see yourself. Because every time you begin a sentence with "I am," your brain starts looking for evidence to prove it true. In this episode, I'm talking about how the stories you repeat become the identities you live from, and why so many of us stay stuck in patterns that feel impossible to change. Not because that's who we are, but because our actions naturally align with the story we've believed for years. The good news? Just because you've repeated a story doesn't make it true. You'll learn how to become aware of the beliefs hiding behind your daily thoughts, question whether they're actually true or simply familiar, and begin writing a new story—one that feels believable, empowering, and aligned with the woman you're becoming. Because maybe what you've been calling your identity was only one chapter... and one chapter never gets to write the ending of your story. If this episode resonates with you, Becoming Her is now open for enrollment. Inside the program, we do the deeper work of uncovering the beliefs and stories that have quietly shaped your identity for years—so you can finally stop living from old narratives and start becoming the woman you were created to be.

  5. Jul 8

    Ep. 320 | You Can't Become Her by Staying Who You've Always Been

    So many women want different results, yet keep holding onto the same identity that's been shaping their choices for years. If you've ever described yourself as a people pleaser, anxious, not confident, terrible with money, too busy, or simply "that's just who I am," this episode is for you. The truth is, those labels aren't facts. They're stories you've repeated long enough to believe. Somewhere along the way, life taught you who you thought you had to become in order to survive—but survival was never meant to be your permanent identity. In this episode, I'm talking about why lasting change isn't created by chasing bigger goals, but by becoming a different version of yourself through the small, consistent choices you make every day. Because your habits shape your lifestyle, your lifestyle shapes your identity, and your identity will always determine the direction of your life. You'll also be challenged to ask yourself: Who have I been pretending to be because it feels safe? What identity am I finally ready to let go of? Who is the woman I am becoming? Because Becoming Her isn't about becoming someone you're not. It's about letting go of the version of yourself that was built out of fear, and becoming more of the woman you were always created to be. And if you're ready to stop simply thinking about becoming her and actually start living as her, Becoming Her is currently open for enrollment. Over the next six months, you'll learn how to create lasting change by transforming the habits, beliefs, and identity that shape your everyday life—so you can become the woman you've always been capable of being. Join us here: www.bflycoaching.com/becoming

  6. Jul 1

    Ep. 319 | The Gift Hidden in the Waiting

    Episode 319 | The Gift Hidden in the Waiting What if the season you're trying so desperately to rush through is the very one changing you the most? It's easy to look around and believe you should be farther along by now. Whether it's your health, your relationships, your finances, your confidence, your business, or your personal growth, it's tempting to believe that not being where you want to be means you've somehow failed. But what if you're exactly where growth happens? In this episode, Shannan shares why acceptance isn't giving up or settling—it's choosing to stop fighting reality so you can move forward with peace instead of resistance. Because acceptance and patience go hand in hand. One allows you to embrace today's chapter, while the other reminds you the story isn't over. You'll discover why resistance creates suffering, why patience is anything but passive, and how some of life's most meaningful growth happens quietly, repetitively, and often without us even noticing. If you've been feeling frustrated by the pace of your progress, this episode is an invitation to stop asking, "Why am I not there yet?" and start asking, "What is this season trying to grow in me?" Because maybe this season isn't about arriving. Maybe it's about becoming. The truth is, you don't need to become a completely different person. Everything you're looking for is already within you. Becoming Her isn't about creating a new version of yourself—it's about uncovering the woman you've always been capable of becoming. The woman you're becoming cannot be rushed. Flowers bloom in their own season. Don't mistake slow for stuck.

  7. Jun 24

    Ep. 318 | What Are You Saying No To?

    Every time you say yes to something, you're also saying no to something else. Yes to overworking may be saying no to rest. Yes to scrolling may be saying no to movement, connection, or growth. Yes to everyone else's needs may be saying no to your own. This episode isn't about guilt. It's about awareness. Because so many of us move through life on autopilot, saying yes to habits, obligations, and expectations without ever asking what they're costing us. You're not just a wife, mother, employee, or caregiver. You're a person too. And investing in yourself isn't selfish, it's one of the most important investments you'll ever make. Join me as we explore how your daily choices are shaping the woman you're becoming and why awareness is the first step toward creating a life that feels more intentional, aligned, and fully yours.

  8. Jun 17

    Ep. 317 | Why Are You Saving It?

    How many things in your life are sitting on a shelf waiting for the "right time"? The nice dishes. The fancy lotion. The outfit you love. The bottle you've been saving. The trip you've been talking about. The photos you keep meaning to take. The fun you've been postponing. The truth is, most women aren't just saving the nice things. They're saving their lives. They're waiting for things to calm down. Waiting until they lose the weight. Waiting until they have more money, more confidence, more time, more certainty. Waiting for some future version of life where everything finally feels settled enough to enjoy. But what if that version never arrives? What if you've been preparing to live for so long that you've forgotten how to actually live? In this episode, I'm talking about the myth of "later" and the subtle ways we postpone joy while convincing ourselves we're being responsible, productive, or practical. Because life isn't a dress rehearsal. There isn't a practice round before the real thing starts. And becoming the next version of yourself isn't just about growth, discipline, or reaching goals. It's also about learning how to experience your life while you're on the way there. The woman you're becoming doesn't wait until everything is perfect before she lets herself enjoy the moment. She wears the dress. She takes the picture. She uses the good stuff. She celebrates ordinary Tuesdays. She stops treating joy like a reward she has to earn. Because the goal isn't to spend your whole life getting ready to live. The goal is to live while you're becoming.

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About

Welcome to Creating Her Best Life, the go-to podcast for women ready to step into their full potential and design a life they truly love. Hosted by certified Master Life Coach Shannan Christiansen, this inspiring show is tailored for women who seek clarity, empowerment, and actionable strategies to overcome life's challenges and achieve personal and professional success. Each week, Shannan dives into various topics ranging from mindset mastery and goal setting to self-care and relationship building, providing expert insights and practical tools that empower listeners to take bold steps toward their dreams. Whether you're navigating a career shift, building confidence, or looking for ways to enhance your every day life, Creating Her Best Life delivers the guidance you need to thrive. Join our community of ambitious women and discover how to rewrite your story, find your purpose, and create a life you're proud to call your own. Because your best life isn't just a dream, it starts now! To learn more, visit bflycoaching.com.

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