Restored: Helping Children of Divorce

Restored
  • 5.0 (65)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Biweekly

Children of divorce are 2–3 times more likely to get divorced and are more likely to struggle with emotional problems, relationship issues, and bad habits. But those stats don’t get to write your story. If your parents’ divorce or family dysfunction left wounds you can’t always put into words, this show is for you.The Restored Podcast shares real stories and expert tips to heal the trauma, navigate family challenges, and build the healthy relationships you’ve always wanted.Ranked in the top 10% of all podcasts and #18 in the divorce category — the only one dedicated to children of divorce — listeners say it’s “more effective than 30 years of counseling.”You’re not doomed to repeat your family’s past. You can break the cycle, and we’re here to help you do it.

  1. 23h ago

    If God Loves Me, Why Did He Allow This Pain? | Dr. Daniel Meola: #178

    When your parents’ divorce or separation hurts deeply, it can raise painful questions about God: Where was He when my family fell apart? Why didn’t He stop it? And if faith matters so much, why didn’t it save my family? In this episode, Joey talks with Dr. Daniel Meola, co-founder of Life-Giving Wounds, about suffering, anger, grief, spiritual bypassing, and the struggle many adult children of divorce face in their relationship with God. They discuss: Why divorce can feel like abandonment by GodWhat to do when faith was used to minimize your painWhy anger and grief aren’t signs of weak faithHow to avoid getting stuck in victimhood or spiritual bypassingWhy acknowledging your pain may be the first step toward healingHow God can transform wounds into strength, love, and purposeIf you’re an adult child of divorce or separation who has ever asked, “God, where were You when my family fell apart?” this episode is for you. Learn more about Life-Giving Wounds Get the book Life-Giving Wounds: A Catholic Guide to Healing for Adult Children of Divorce or Separation Get Joey’s free guide, 7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce: Get Joey’s book, It’s Not Your Fault Subscribe to the Restored podcast: Get the Book: Searching for and Maintaining Peace: A Small Treatise on Peace of Heart Get the Book: Interior Freedom Show notes

    57 min

  2. Jun 16

    You Can’t Heal Without Safe People or Boundaries | Billy: #177

    When your family breaks apart, especially through years of fighting, manipulation, or emotional chaos, you can learn to survive by staying busy, shutting down, or pretending it didn’t affect you. But what happens when that pain starts showing up in your marriage, your parenting, your confidence, or the way you handle conflict? In this episode, Billy shares how her parents’ long, painful divorce began after years of intense conflict, manipulation, and isolation. She opens up about coping through overachievement, the safe adults who helped her heal, and the boundaries she’s had to learn with an unsafe parent. We discuss: Why Billy expected her parents to divorce, even as a childHow she coped by becoming highly involved, successful, and busyThe loneliness of growing up without safe adults nearbyHow one pastor’s wife helped her feel truly loved for the first timeWhy journaling helped her process, remember, and healHow her husband helped her learn to handle conflict without fearWhat boundaries with a parent can look like as an adultHow Billy is building a healthy family, even though she didn’t come from oneIf you’ve ever wondered how to honor your parents without letting them control you, or how to build something healthier than what you came from, this episode is for you. Resources Mentioned: Share Your Story with Restored:  https://restoredministry.com/story 7 Ways to Work Through the Pain of Your Parents’ Divorce or Separation: https://restoredministry.com/7ways The Gottman Institute:  https://www.gottman.com/ Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts by Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott: https://amzn.to/3PPRy9J The Anatomy of Peace by The Arbinger Institute: https://amzn.to/4aEsBVE Show notes: https://restoredministry.com/blog/177

    49 min

  3. Jun 2

    Why Affairs Happen, and How to Build a Faithful Marriage | Doug Hinderer : #176

    When a parent cheats, it doesn’t just wound the marriage. It can wound the children too. For many young people from broken families, infidelity creates a terrifying fear: What if I get cheated on too? Or worse, what if I become the one who cheats? In this episode, Joey talks with marriage and family therapist Doug Hinderer about how affairs happen, why betrayal damages a child’s ability to trust, and how young people from broken families can avoid repeating their parents’ mistakes. They discuss: Why affairs often begin long before anything physical happensHow infidelity affects children, even years laterWhy love feels unsafe after betrayalThe role of forgiveness in healing from a parent’s affairHow to talk about the fear of infidelity in dating or marriageThe three habits that help build a faithful, lasting marriageWhy you are not doomed to repeat your parents’ storyIf you’re afraid of being cheated on, afraid of becoming your parents, or unsure if lasting love is even possible after what you witnessed growing up, this episode is for you. Restored Resources It’s Not Your Fault | Restored Book Happy Marriage for Life | Doug Hinderer Marriage Unhindered | Relevant Radio How to Forgive | International Forgiveness Institute “Impossible” Marriages Redeemed: They Didn’t End the Story in the Middle | Leila Miller “Impossible” Marriages Redeemed | Amazon Doug Hinderer’s email doug@relevantradio.com Shownotes

    57 min

  4. May 19

    Her Dad Cheated, Her Family Broke, But She Broke the Cycle | Autumn: #175

    When your family breaks apart, anger makes sense. But if it has nowhere to go, it can turn into bitterness, depression, addiction, relationship fear, and despair. In this episode, Autumn shares how her parents’ divorce, her father’s infidelity, generational dysfunction, and sexual abuse shaped the way she saw men, love, marriage, God, and herself. She opens up about the rage she carried, her struggle with pornography addiction, suicidal thoughts, and the fear that she was doomed to repeat her parents’ mistakes. But her story does not end there. Autumn also shares how faith, writing, friendship, therapy, forgiveness, and a healthy marriage helped her heal and build a life that looks completely different from the brokenness she came from. In this episode, we discuss: Why anger after divorce is often a response to real loss and injusticeHow divorce can feel like a death, even when it was “necessary”Why fear of repeating your parents’ mistakes is so commonHow pornography addiction can be connected to deeper woundsWhat Autumn learned to look for in a spouseHow she forgave her father without pretending the hurt didn’t happenWhy your parents’ divorce is part of your story, but not your identityIf you’re from a broken family, angry about what happened, afraid of repeating your parents’ story, or wondering if healthy love is even possible for you, this episode is for you. Share Your Story Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your Fault

    48 min

  5. May 7

    How To Avoid Falling In Love With A Jerk | Dr. John Van Epp: #174

    What if the person you fall for isn’t just a choice, but a pattern? Most people think love is about chemistry, attraction, or finding “the one.” But according to today’s guest, the heart alone is not enough. If you come from a divorced or dysfunctional family, your wounds can shape who you trust, who you’re attracted to, and what feels “normal” in a relationship. Without realizing it, you might be drawn to someone familiar, not because they’re good for you, but because they feel like the past. In this episode, we explore how to build love with both your heart and your head. We talk about repetition compulsion, red flags, rushing trust or physical intimacy, and how to tell whether someone is actually capable of healthy love. My guest is Dr. John Van Epp, relationship expert, counselor, and author of How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk. If you’ve ever wondered, “Why am I attracted to people who aren’t good for me?” or “How do I avoid repeating my parents’ marriage?” this episode is for you. Get our book Check other free resources: How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk by Dr. John Van Epp: Love Thinks Head Meets Heart course: Shownotes

    53 min

  6. Apr 23

    When Not to Listen to Your Parents About Love | 3 Callers from Broken Families #173

    In this episode, I mentor three people LIVE through the problems they’re facing in their broken families: One caller asks how to deal with a dad who avoids the reality of his divorce, and whether it’s his place to confront him or let that battle go.Another asks a question people are afraid to say out loud: Can I actually heal? And if so, how does healing really happen?And finally, a young woman opens up about starting her first relationship while watching her divorced parents repeat unhealthy patterns, and asks, “Who do I go to for relationship advice when my parents haven’t modeled a healthy relationship themselves?”If you’ve ever felt torn, stuck, or unsure how to navigate the pain and dysfunction of your broken family, this episode is for you.  View details for Healing Retreat May 1-3 in Philly Ask a question anonymously on the show Get Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to Avoid Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your Fault Shownotes

    40 min

  7. Apr 7

    You’re the Third Parent: How to Break Free Without Hurting Your Siblings | Celeste: #172

    At 14 or 15 years old, Celeste learned her parents’ marriage was unraveling. Affairs. Addiction. Secrets. Her siblings didn’t know. But she did — because she was the oldest daughter. And before long, she wasn’t just watching the marriage fall apart… she was managing it. In this episode, Celeste shares what it was like to grow up as the “third parent” in a family where divorce was unthinkable — and what that responsibility did to her nervous system, her faith, and her ability to trust. We talk about: Carrying secrets to protect the family’s imagePanic attacks and anxiety that she didn’t know how to nameThe guilt of moving away and “leaving siblings in a burning building”Why even a “necessary” divorce still deeply wounds childrenAnd why dating now triggers intense anxietyCeleste’s story is honest, raw, and hopeful. Because while you can survive being the third parent… At some point, you have to stop carrying everyone else. If you were the responsible one… If you feel guilty for wanting your own life… If anxiety follows you into relationships… Or if you’re afraid you’ll repeat your parents’ marriage… This episode is for you. Suicide Hotline: Call or Text 988 (English or Spanish) Share Your Story Get the Book or FREE chapters: It’s Not Your Fault Get Dakota’s FREE Guide, The Biggest Fitness Mistakes to Avoid Watch the Documentary: Kenny Watch the Trailer: Kenny (3:31 min) Shownotes

    1h 34m

  8. Apr 6

    You’re Invited: A Healing Retreat May 1-3 in Philadelphia

    We’re hosting a rare healing retreat for young adults from divorced or dysfunctional families May 1-3 in Malvern, PA, just outside Philadelphia. View details or sign up at RestoredMinistry.com/philly. Questions? Email JordanaM@restoredministry.com

    4 min
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About

Children of divorce are 2–3 times more likely to get divorced and are more likely to struggle with emotional problems, relationship issues, and bad habits. But those stats don’t get to write your story. If your parents’ divorce or family dysfunction left wounds you can’t always put into words, this show is for you.The Restored Podcast shares real stories and expert tips to heal the trauma, navigate family challenges, and build the healthy relationships you’ve always wanted.Ranked in the top 10% of all podcasts and #18 in the divorce category — the only one dedicated to children of divorce — listeners say it’s “more effective than 30 years of counseling.”You’re not doomed to repeat your family’s past. You can break the cycle, and we’re here to help you do it.

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