Revolutionise Your Love Life

Revolutionise Your Love Life
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  • Health & Fitness
  • Updated Semimonthly

Revolutionise Your Love Life is a podcast is on creating healthy, loving relationships. From ending relationships that have run their course to finding new love and being the most fulfilled you can possiblly be. Revolutionise Your Love Life is hosted by Heather Garbutt.

  1. Conscious Intentional Divorce: Understanding the Victim Mindset

    6d ago

    Conscious Intentional Divorce: Understanding the Victim Mindset

    In this second episode in our series on conscious intentional divorce, I’m joined again by the wonderful Colette Bane to explore the victim mindset and how it can emerge during divorce. We are very clear that this conversation is not about survivors of domestic abuse or coercive control. That is a different and very important subject. Here, we are looking at the emotional patterns that can arise when someone feels aggrieved, powerless, unappreciated or resistant to the end of a relationship. Colette and I talk about how victim mindset can delay and frustrate the divorce process, sometimes appearing like passive revenge, and why it is so important to work with a supportive team who can help you return to your adult self and make decisions from clarity rather than reactivity.  Key Takeaways 1. Not every emotional person is in victim mindset Divorce is emotional by nature. Feeling grief, anger or fear does not mean you are in victim mindset. But when someone is in victim mindset, they are often highly emotional and may not be making decisions from their most mature, grounded self. 2. This is not about domestic abuse or coercive control Colette and I make an important distinction: survivors of abuse or coercively controlling behaviour are not being discussed here. Those situations require a very different level of understanding, protection and support. 3. Victim mindset can prolong suffering When someone feels aggrieved by the separation, they may unconsciously delay, obstruct or frustrate the process. This can create more pain and more problems than were necessary. 4. Communication is much more than words Colette shares why video or in-person conversations can be so important. Tone, body language and emotional cues often reveal far more than written instructions ever could. 5. Support helps you return to your adult self A lawyer can support the legal process, but emotional steadiness often requires a wider team: a coach, therapist, counsellor or trusted support network. The aim is to move from reactivity into centred, adult decision-making. Reference Material Mentioned Previous podcast episodes on domestic abuse, coercive control, power and control relationships: Episodes around 60-66 - identifying power and control dynamics and protecting yourself in unsafe relationships. About Colette BaneColette is a family solicitor at Knights. She supports clients through divorce, financial arrangements, child arrangements and other family law matters with a combination of legal clarity, emotional intelligence and strategic care. In this series, Colette brings her warmth, humour and professional wisdom to the question of how we can navigate divorce more consciously, intentionally and with as much dignity as possible. You can find Colette on Instagram at @colette.familylaw You can also find her on LinkedIn as Colette Bain, family solicitor at Knights. About Your HostHeather Garbutt is a psychotherapist, love coach and accredited Calling In The One practitioner with over twenty years of experience working with women on love, relationships and the interior work that makes lasting change possible. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 📩 JOIN THE NEWSLETTER Each week I write about conscious love, the interior work and what calling in a real relationship actually takes. Join the community here: https://heathergarbutt.com/newsletter ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 💛 CALLING IN THE ONE If you are ready for structured, supported work to understand your patterns and call in the relationship you deserve, find out more about working with me here: https://heathergarbutt.com/services/ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom: https://boostandbloom.co.uk/ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ See all podcast episodes here: https://heathergarbutt.com/podcast/

    13 min
  2. How to Divorce With Clarity, Dignity and Emotional Maturity

    May 24

    How to Divorce With Clarity, Dignity and Emotional Maturity

    In this episode of Revolutionise Your Love Life, I’m joined by the wonderful Colette Bane, a family lawyer whose emotional intelligence, clarity and care make her such a valuable guide for people navigating divorce. Together we explore what it means to approach divorce consciously and intentionally, especially when powerful emotions begin to surface. Divorce is not simply a legal process. It is an emotional, psychological and deeply human transition. There may be grief for the relationship, the future you thought you were building, the friendship you once had, or the family structure you hoped would last. There may also be anger, fear, confusion, loss of control, and old childhood dynamics that unexpectedly come to the fore. Colette and I talk about the importance of setting clear intentions early in the process, so that you can return again and again to your wisest adult self. This does not mean denying the pain. It means having the right support around you so that you can make decisions from strength, maturity and clarity, rather than from fear, helplessness or reactivity. We also touch on menopause, empty nest transitions, emotional overwhelm, learned helplessness and weaponised incompetence, and why finding your tribe is essential when you are moving through the end of a relationship. This is the first in a short sequence of conversations with Colette, so do listen out for the next episodes too. Key Takeaways From This Episode 1. Divorce is an emotional process as much as a legal one Even when there are practical arrangements to be made, divorce often brings up grief, fear, anger, loss and confusion. The legal process may be the structure, but the emotional process is what many people are truly living through. 2. Intention setting matters Conscious intentional divorce begins with deciding who you want to be in the process. Do you want to move through it with dignity, clarity and maturity? Do you want to protect your children from unnecessary conflict? Setting those intentions early can help you keep returning to your wisest self. 3. Your “wise adult self” may not always be the part of you that shows up  Divorce can activate old patterns. Sibling rivalry, childlike helplessness, parental power dynamics and victim positions can all appear. When we recognise these patterns, we have a better chance of stepping back into our adult selves. 4. Support is essential Your lawyer can guide you legally, but you also need emotional support. A coach, therapist, counsellor or wise support network can help you process the feelings, regulate your nervous system and make clearer decisions. 5. Menopause and empty nest transitions can change everything For many women, menopause brings a shift in hormones, identity, priorities and tolerance. When children leave home, some women realise they have also been “parenting” their spouse and no longer want to continue in that role. References Episodes 88 and 89 - These explore menopause and its impact on women’s emotional lives, relationships, priorities and sense of self. About Colette BaneColette is a partner in the family team at Knights. She is known for her discreet, premium service and strategic approach, advising clients on financial arrangements in divorce, particularly in high-net-worth cases. She also supports clients with child arrangements and wealth protection through pre- and post-nuptial agreements. Colette has expertise in surrogacy and modern family formation. Her clients value her responsiveness, emotional intelligence and ability to navigate complex and high-stakes situations with both clarity and care. Working nationally as part of Knights’ leading family law team, Colette delivers bespoke, results-focused advice tailored to each client’s unique needs. Find Colette:Instagram: @colette.familylawyerAbout Your HostHeather Garbutt is a psychotherapist, love coach and accredited Calling In The One practitioner with over twenty years of experience working with women on love, relationships and the interior work that makes lasting change possible. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━📩 JOIN THE NEWSLETTEREach week I write about conscious love, the interior work and what calling in a real relationship actually takes. Join the community here:https://heathergarbutt.com/newsletter━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━💛 CALLING IN THE ONEIf you are ready for structured, supported work to understand your patterns and call in the relationship you deserve, find out more about working with me here:https://heathergarbutt.com/services/━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom:https://boostandbloom.co.uk/━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━See all podcast episodes here:https://heathergarbutt.com/podcast/

    13 min
  3. The Inner Work of Lasting Love - with Matt Albiges and Rebeca Pereira

    May 10

    The Inner Work of Lasting Love - with Matt Albiges and Rebeca Pereira

    In this warm, candid and deeply human conversation for the Revolutionise Your Love Life podcast, I speak with couples therapists and relationship coaches Matt Albiges and Rebeca Pereira about what it really takes to create a lasting, loving romantic relationship. We explore their own love story, from meeting on an NLP training course and later “bumping into” one another on the London Underground, to the deeper inner work that helped them become not just partners in love, but partners in purpose. What I found so moving about this conversation was their honesty. Matt and Rebeca speak with real tenderness about the places where they have had to grow: slowing down, speeding up, learning to feel safe, honouring protective parts, understanding masculine and feminine energies, and making time for play, humour, intimacy and presence. Their relationship is not presented as perfect. It is something alive, conscious, intentional and lovingly tended. This episode is a beautiful reminder that love can become a place of healing, growth and joyful partnership when both people are willing to meet themselves, and each other, with courage, curiosity and care. Key Takeaways 1. A good relationship is created, not simply foundMatt and Rebeca remind us that love does not flourish by accident. Like any meaningful area of life, relationship requires attention, learning, humility and practice. If we believe that the “right” relationship should always feel easy, we may miss the deeper invitation to grow. 2. Inner work changes the whole relationship dynamicRebeca speaks powerfully about learning to recognise her own trauma responses and protective parts, rather than acting from them unconsciously. Matt shares how he had learned to detach and “zone out” in a previous relationship, and how Rebeca helped him reclaim playfulness, confidence and emotional presence. 3. Curiosity is one of the great medicines of loveRather than assuming they know what the other means, Matt and Rebeca ask questions. “Can you help me understand?” becomes a bridge. Curiosity softens defensiveness and helps partners come back into connection. 4. Humour can heal when there is enough safetyTheir relationship is full of laughter, but Matt wisely offers a warning: humour only works when it comes from warmth and respect. In a painful or disconnected relationship, humour can easily become sarcasm, dismissal or mockery. 5. Intimacy needs both togetherness and spaceOne of the most striking parts of the conversation is their commitment to both closeness and individuality. They make time for dates, museums, long lunches and playful moments together, while also honouring separate bedrooms, solo interests, friendships and time apart. There is enough space for each person to breathe, and enough devotion to keep choosing one another. Reference Material Mentioned Aligned With Love: Matt and Rebeca’s relationship coaching and couples therapy work can be found at alignedwithlove.net. Their work includes the Relationship Breakthrough Programme and resources for couples and individuals. (Buzzsprout) Should I Stay or Should I Go? by Matt Albiges: Matt’s book is listed on Amazon as Should I Stay or Should I Go?: From Relationship Clash to Clarity in 5 Simple Steps. (Amazon) About Matt Albiges and Rebeca PereiraMatt and Rebeca are couples therapists and relationship coaches based in London. Together, they help couples and individuals transform relationship difficulties into deeper connection, clarity, passion and love through their work at Aligned With Love. They are the hosts of The Relationship Breakthrough Show with Matt & Rebeca, and Matt is the author of Should I Stay or Should I Go?: From Relationship Clash to Clarity in 5 Simple Steps. They have also been featured in broadcast and print media, including the BBC. About Your HostI married at 34 with great hope for a long, happy marriage and a family. Over time, though, the relationship unravelled into power struggles, criticism and emotional distance. My own childhood conditioning had left me disconnected from my feelings and needs and despite years of personal work, I couldn’t see a way forward. We separated in 2007. I stayed on my own for several years, not wanting to repeat the pattern again. In 2016 my life transformed. Through discovering Katherine Woodward Thomas’s work, I called in my “One.” Although I was already a trained psychotherapist and deeply committed to self-development, this work created breakthroughs I hadn’t experienced before. To give my new relationship the strongest foundation possible, I trained as both a Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “The One” coach. Through that process, I learned to honour myself more fully and to build love rooted in trust, presence and emotional truth. As a psychotherapist of over 35 years, I was genuinely surprised to discover through this work, entirely new levels of insight, empowerment and relational skills, insights I now live and practice within my own relationship. Whether you are recently separated, healing unresolved pain from the past, or longing to create a deeply nourishing relationship, I would be honoured to support you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your authentic self and open the door to lasting, meaningful love. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━📩 JOIN THE NEWSLETTEREach week I write about conscious love, the interior work and what calling in a real relationship actually takes. Join the community here:https://heathergarbutt.com/newsletter━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━💛 CALLING IN THE ONEIf you are ready for structured, supported work to understand your patterns and call in the relationship you deserve, find out more about working with me here:https://heathergarbutt.com/services/━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom:https://boostandbloom.co.uk/━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━See all podcast episodes here:https://heathergarbutt.com/podcast/

    56 min
  4. A New Paradigm in Love: How to Choose and Create the Relationship of Your Life

    May 3

    A New Paradigm in Love: How to Choose and Create the Relationship of Your Life

    In this special episode of Revolutionise Your Love Life, Heather Garbutt is interviewed by Matt about a new paradigm in dating and relationships, and what it really takes to choose and create “the relationship of your life”. Heather shares her own turning point, from being a long-time psychotherapist who still found love elusive, to doing Calling in “The One” herself after a lonely Valentine’s Day in 2016. Together, they explore why awareness alone is not enough, how core beliefs like “I am alone” quietly shape your choices, and why healing your inner “young self” stops you turning partners into parents. They also discuss Heather’s work in Conscious Uncoupling, and how to end relationships with dignity, stability and as much peace as possible, especially when children are involved. More support and resources can be found at Heathergarbutt.com. Key takeaways Awareness isn’t transformation. Knowing your patterns helps, but change requires tools, practice and support so you can behave differently when you are triggered. Core beliefs drive your love life. Beliefs like “I am alone” can make you miss love, help and connection even when it is offered, and can keep you over-functioning in relationships. Chemistry can be a clue, not a sign. Intense attraction often pulls you towards what is familiar, including emotional unavailability and old heartbreak patterns. Heal the “young self” so you stop dating from childhood needs. When your inner child is driving, you can unconsciously try to make a partner into a parent, which damages intimacy and can tip into power and control dynamics. Conscious Uncoupling creates a calmer ending and a better future. The goal is to reduce competitiveness and blame, stabilise emotionally, clear the air where safe, and build workable agreements, especially for co-parenting. Mentioned in the episode Calling in “The One” (Katherine Woodward Thomas) Conscious Uncoupling (Katherine Woodward Thomas) Eight Dates by John & Julie Gottman The Five Love Languages (love languages quiz) About Matt:Matt Albiges is a qualified therapist and relationship expert who uses techniques including coaching and NLP. He describes being motivated by “that moment” when a client commits to turning their relationship, and life, around. His work is shaped by his own journey through challenging relationships, followed by a deep dive into understanding what makes relationships work. He has also worked extensively in organisational change, and notes that many common challenges are mindset-based, which informs his relationship work. About Your Host:I married at 34 with great hope for a long, happy marriage and a family. Over time, though, the relationship unraveled into power struggles, criticism and emotional distance. My own childhood conditioning had left me disconnected from my feelings and needs and despite years of personal work, I couldn’t see a way forward. We separated in 2007. I stayed on my own for several years, not wanting to repeat the pattern again. In 2016 my life transformed. Through discovering Katherine Woodward Thomas’s work, I called in my “One.” Although I was already a trained psychotherapist and deeply committed to self-development, this work created breakthroughs I hadn’t experienced before. To give my new relationship the strongest foundation possible, I trained as both a Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “The One” coach. Through that process, I learned to honour myself more fully and to build love rooted in trust, presence and emotional truth. As a psychotherapist of over 35 years, I was genuinely surprised to discover through this work, entirely new levels of insight, empowerment and relational skills, insights I now live and practice within my own relationship.Whether you are recently separated, healing unresolved pain from the past, or longing to create a deeply nourishing relationship, I would be honoured to support you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your authentic self and open the door to lasting, meaningful love. This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom.See all podcast episodes here.

    41 min
  5. When Love Feels Hard when Life Looks Fine with Marina Love

    Apr 19

    When Love Feels Hard when Life Looks Fine with Marina Love

    In this episode of Revolutionise Your Love Life, Heather Garbutt sits down with Marina Love, a solution-focused hypnotherapist who works with high-achieving, self-aware people who look “fine” on the outside but feel overwhelmed, stuck or emotionally drained on the inside. Together they explore why relationships can start to feel like hard work when your life is ticking along, and how chronic low-level stress quietly pushes the nervous system into survival mode. Marina explains how fight, flight and freeze show up in everyday relating, why the brain becomes hypervigilant and obsessive when it senses threat, and how small, practical steps can rewire the brain towards calm, connection and emotional presence. More resources and episodes are available at Heathergarbutt.com. Key takeaways Coping isn’t the same as calm. Stress can build slowly as a “low hum” under life’s demands, leaving you surviving rather than thriving, even when everything looks OK on paper.  Survival mode makes love feel threatening. When the nervous system is overloaded, the brain scans for danger, reads meaning into tiny cues, and can turn partners into “intimate enemies”.  Fight, flight, freeze shows up in relationships. Arguments, withdrawal, people-pleasing, avoidance, overthinking and emotional distance often map directly to threat responses, not “personality flaws”.  Your brain can’t tell imagination from reality. Under stress, the mind creates scenarios, then the body reacts as if they are true, fuelling adrenaline, cortisol, guilt and shame.  Small actions change the chemistry. Practical, manageable steps build momentum and dopamine (reward and progress), reduce cortisol, and help the thinking brain come back online, improving communication and connection.  Mentioned in this episode Solution-focused hypnotherapy (future-focused, practical, nervous-system calming work)   The role of dopamine (progress/reward) vs cortisol/adrenaline (stress response)  About Marina:Marina Love is a solution-focused hypnotherapist supporting high-achieving, self-aware clients who feel capable externally but internally overwhelmed, stuck or emotionally depleted, often noticing the impact most strongly in relationships. Her work is grounded in neuroscience, nervous system regulation, and practical steps that help clients move out of survival mode into a calmer, more energised and emotionally present way of living, without needing to revisit the past. About Heather:I married at 34 with great hope for a long, happy marriage and a family. Over time, though, the relationship unraveled into power struggles, criticism and emotional distance. My own childhood conditioning had left me disconnected from my feelings and needs and despite years of personal work, I couldn’t see a way forward. We separated in 2007. I stayed on my own for several years, not wanting to repeat the pattern again. In 2016 my life transformed. Through discovering Katherine Woodward Thomas’s work, I called in my “One.” Although I was already a trained psychotherapist and deeply committed to self-development, this work created breakthroughs I hadn’t experienced before. To give my new relationship the strongest foundation possible, I trained as both a Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “The One” coach. Through that process, I learned to honour myself more fully and to build love rooted in trust, presence and emotional truth. As a psychotherapist of over 35 years, I was genuinely surprised to discover through this work, entirely new levels of insight, empowerment and relational skills, insights I now live and practice within my own relationship.Whether you are recently separated, healing unresolved pain from the past, or longing to create a deeply nourishing relationship, I would be honoured to support you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your authentic self and open the door to lasting, meaningful love. This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom.See all podcast episodes here.

    40 min
  6. Dating After Narcissistic Abuse: How to Trust Yourself Again

    Apr 5

    Dating After Narcissistic Abuse: How to Trust Yourself Again

    In this episode of Revolutionise Your Love Life, Heather Garbutt is joined by Catalina, a psychotherapist from Romania who supports survivors and thrivers of narcissistic abuse. Together they explore what it takes to rebuild trust after coercion and gaslighting, and how to date intentionally so you do not repeat old patterns. Heather shares the core principles of Calling in “The One” and Conscious Uncoupling, including why the first relationship to strengthen is the one you have with yourself, how to discern safely (especially online), and why going slowly is not caution, it is wisdom. Find more support and resources at Heathergarbutt.com. Key takeaways Go slowly and date from your adult self. After abuse, the nervous system can confuse intensity with connection. “Chemistry” can be the ignition of an old pattern, not a green flag. Discernment is a skill. Watch behaviour, not promises. Notice how someone treats service staff, how they speak about ex partners and family, and whether their values actually match yours. Know what you want, and how you want to feel. Focus on character and values (kindness, respect, trustworthiness, warmth), not surface traits. Beware love bombing. People who have been starved of safety and tenderness can be especially vulnerable to fast praise, fast intimacy, and big future talk. Do your emotional work first. Without healing, “gut instinct” can be pulled by familiarity rather than truth. The work is to become grounded, resourced, and sovereign. About Catalina:Catalina is a Romanian psychotherapist specialising in individual and group work, with a particular focus on helping women and men recover from narcissistic abuse. Her approach is deeply compassionate, practical, and rooted in restoring voice, safety, and self-trust so survivors can move from coping to thriving. About Your Host:I married at 34 with great hope for a long, happy marriage and a family. Over time, though, the relationship unraveled into power struggles, criticism and emotional distance. My own childhood conditioning had left me disconnected from my feelings and needs and despite years of personal work, I couldn’t see a way forward. We separated in 2007. I stayed on my own for several years, not wanting to repeat the pattern again. In 2016 my life transformed. Through discovering Katherine Woodward Thomas’s work, I called in my “One.” Although I was already a trained psychotherapist and deeply committed to self-development, this work created breakthroughs I hadn’t experienced before. To give my new relationship the strongest foundation possible, I trained as both a Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “The One” coach. Through that process, I learned to honour myself more fully and to build love rooted in trust, presence and emotional truth. As a psychotherapist of over 35 years, I was genuinely surprised to discover through this work, entirely new levels of insight, empowerment and relational skills, insights I now live and practice within my own relationship.Whether you are recently separated, healing unresolved pain from the past, or longing to create a deeply nourishing relationship, I would be honoured to support you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your authentic self and open the door to lasting, meaningful love. This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom.See all podcast episodes here.

    52 min
  7. Opening to Possibility: Becoming Available to Love, with Prem Glidden

    Mar 22

    Opening to Possibility: Becoming Available to Love, with Prem Glidden

    In this episode of Revolutionise Your Love Life, Heather Garbutt speaks with Prem Glidden, coach and author of Opening to Possibility: Becoming Available to Love and Be Loved, about what it really means to become available for love. Together they explore how early-life messages like “I’m not lovable” can quietly shape adult dating and relationships, why “chemistry” can sometimes be a trauma signal rather than a soulmate sign, and how living from possibility changes what you allow, what you choose, and what you can receive. Prem also shares her own story, including meeting her beloved Bob and marrying at 67, as proof that it is never too late to create a relationship that feels safe, real, and deeply nourishing. (More resources and support can be found at Heathergarbutt.com.) Key takeaways Availability starts with you. If you want love that is steady and secure, the first relationship to strengthen is the one you have with yourself. Treat your inner parts gently. Trauma responses are protective. When you meet them with compassion (not force), you stop being run by old patterns. Do not outsource worthiness. Looking to a partner to prove your value turns dating into quicksand. Self-trust is what creates solid ground. Let truth lead, not the “high”. That rush of intensity can be familiar dysfunction. Slow down, discern, and choose from your wisest adult self. Love is co-created. Healthy relationships are built through communication, repair, respect, and shared responsibility, not perfection. About Prem:Prem Glidden is a Calling in The One coach and one of the first certified True You coaches trained by Catherine Woodward Thomas. She helps people graduate from old stories that keep love at a distance and step into a life led by aliveness, agency, and self-trust. Prem is the author of Opening to Possibility: Becoming Available to Love and Be Loved and shares her work at premglidden.com. About Your Host:I married at 34 with great hope for a long, happy marriage and a family. Over time, though, the relationship unraveled into power struggles, criticism and emotional distance. My own childhood conditioning had left me disconnected from my feelings and needs and despite years of personal work, I couldn’t see a way forward. We separated in 2007. I stayed on my own for several years, not wanting to repeat the pattern again. In 2016 my life transformed. Through discovering Katherine Woodward Thomas’s work, I called in my “One.” Although I was already a trained psychotherapist and deeply committed to self-development, this work created breakthroughs I hadn’t experienced before. To give my new relationship the strongest foundation possible, I trained as both a Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “The One” coach. Through that process, I learned to honour myself more fully and to build love rooted in trust, presence and emotional truth. As a psychotherapist of over 35 years, I was genuinely surprised to discover through this work, entirely new levels of insight, empowerment and relational skills, insights I now live and practice within my own relationship. Whether you are recently separated, healing unresolved pain from the past, or longing to create a deeply nourishing relationship, I would be honoured to support you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your authentic self and open the door to lasting, meaningful love. This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom.See all podcast episodes here.

    41 min
  8. Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse: Catalina’s Survivor-to-Thriver Story

    Mar 8

    Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse: Catalina’s Survivor-to-Thriver Story

    In this heartfelt episode of Revolutionise Your Love Life, Heather Garbutt is joined by Cătălina Popoveniuc, a Romanian psychotherapist with 23 years of experience supporting survivors and thrivers of narcissistic abuse. Catalina shares her own lived journey from surviving a narcissistic family system and multiple narcissistic relationships to reclaiming her voice and building a life that feels bright, free, and fully hers. Together, they talk candidly about the realities of gaslighting, cultural stigma, and the practical steps that help someone move from confusion and fear into safety, clarity, and self-trust, so thriving becomes possible. Key takeaways Gaslighting is designed to fracture reality. Catalina shares how prolonged gaslighting can leave someone doubting their perception and sanity, even years later, and why naming it matters. Empathy without boundaries can be exploited. Both Heather and Catalina discuss how caring, empathic people are often targeted, and why early boundary-setting is not harsh, it is self-respect. Safety first, then strategy. Catalina emphasises planning: legal advice, therapeutic support, and a trusted network before leaving, especially when the risk of escalation is real. Post-separation abuse is a real risk. Leaving is not always the end of the manipulation, which is why specialised support and informed legal guidance are essential. Thriving means rebuilding identity. After abuse, many people do not know what they like, need, or want. Healing includes rediscovering preferences, strengths, work options, and a future that feels life-giving. About Cătălina:Cătălina Popoveniuc, a psychotherapist specialising in individual and group therapy, with a particular focus on supporting survivors of narcissistic abuse - both women and men. With 23 years of experience working with people, she has developed a deeply human,compassionate, and supportive approach, grounded in empathy and genuine respect for each person’s path. For Cătălina, it’s essential that every client feels heard, seen, and understood. About Your Host:I married at 34 with great hope for a long, happy marriage and a family. Over time, though, the relationship unraveled into power struggles, criticism and emotional distance. My own childhood conditioning had left me disconnected from my feelings and needs and despite years of personal work, I couldn’t see a way forward. We separated in 2007. I stayed on my own for several years, not wanting to repeat the pattern again. In 2016 my life transformed. Through discovering Katherine Woodward Thomas’s work, I called in my “One.” Although I was already a trained psychotherapist and deeply committed to self-development, this work created breakthroughs I hadn’t experienced before. To give my new relationship the strongest foundation possible, I trained as both a Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in “The One” coach. Through that process, I learned to honour myself more fully and to build love rooted in trust, presence and emotional truth. As a psychotherapist of over 35 years, I was genuinely surprised to discover through this work, entirely new levels of insight, empowerment and relational skills, insights I now live and practice within my own relationship.Whether you are recently separated, healing unresolved pain from the past, or longing to create a deeply nourishing relationship, I would be honoured to support you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your authentic self and open the door to lasting, meaningful love. This podcast is brought to you by Boost and Bloom.

    36 min
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Revolutionise Your Love Life is a podcast is on creating healthy, loving relationships. From ending relationships that have run their course to finding new love and being the most fulfilled you can possiblly be. Revolutionise Your Love Life is hosted by Heather Garbutt.

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