Marisa is back! After nearly a year away from Attune + Align podcast, she returns with an unfiltered conversation about turning 40, perimenopause, visibility, yoga philosophy, friendship, and the strange beauty of being in a season of life that feels both grotesque and gorgeous. This is a candid reflection on learning to zoom out, see the whole landscape, and remember that we are so much more than the difficult thing we're experiencing in any given moment. Episode 25: Grotesque & Gorgeous — This Is 40 What does it feel like to turn 40 and suddenly not recognize yourself? In this deeply personal, unfiltered episode of Attune + Align, Marisa returns to the podcast after nearly a year away — not with a teleprompter or polished production, but with a stack of Post-it notes and a lot to say. Since opening her brick-and-mortar yoga studio, life has become fuller, busier, more demanding, and, in many ways, more beautiful. But turning 40 brought an unexpected reckoning with her body, her identity, and what it means to be seen. Marisa opens up about the early stages of perimenopause, changing skin, bloating, heartburn, body image, and the strange experience of waking up one day and feeling like you're suddenly living in a different body. But this episode isn't really about perimenopause. It's about our relationship to what we're experiencing. Through yoga philosophy, Marisa explores the difference between being an obstacle and experiencing an obstacle. She shares the metaphor of the red-tailed hawk: when we're caught up in the details of a difficult moment, we can forget that we're capable of zooming out and seeing the entire landscape. And perhaps that's what turning 40 has taught her most: life can be grotesque and gorgeous at the exact same time. Along the way, Marisa gives heartfelt thanks to the women who have supported her through this season — from health and Ayurvedic guidance to sound baths, tarot, friendship, community, and personal training. Because sometimes the most important thing we can do when we're struggling in our bodies is remember that we don't have to do it alone. In this episode, Marisa talks about: Why Attune + Align disappeared for nearly a year Opening her yoga studio and the realities of owning a brick-and-mortar business Turning 40 and suddenly feeling different in her body The early stages of perimenopause Body image, visibility, and the complicated desire to be seen Her childhood experience of being put on a unicyclist's back — and what it taught her about visibility Why you need your “girlies” The women who have helped carry her through this season Sound baths, tarot, Ayurveda, and personal training What 14 years of yoga practice has taught her about suffering and identification The yogic concept of stepping back and seeing the bigger picture The metaphor of the red-tailed hawk Holding the “grotesque” and the “gorgeous” simultaneously What it means to be 40, busy, uncomfortable, grateful, and completely alive The big takeaway You are not the thing you're experiencing. You are not your bloating. You are not your heartburn. You are not your changing skin, your difficult season, your business challenges, or the obstacle directly in front of you. Sometimes we need to step back far enough to see the whole landscape — the hard parts and the beautiful parts — and remember that both can exist at once. Mentioned in the episode Marisa gives shout-outs to the women who have supported her during this chapter, including Cianne, Gina, Nimisha, Kimber, Jodi, Sara, and Surbhi, and reflects on the different ways community, wellness practices, friendship, and support have helped her navigate this transition. She also mentions Glennon Doyle, yoga philosophy, the concept of maya, Ayurveda, tarot, sound healing, and her ongoing yoga practice. Retreats & what's next Marisa also shares what's coming up beyond the podcast, including a September 20th Soulpreneur retreat in Calistoga for women business owners, an October 4th day-long yoga retreat in West Marin, and a seven-day retreat at Haramara in Sayulita, Mexico, in April 2027. A question for you What's grotesque and gorgeous in your life right now? Marisa invites listeners to share what's happening on both sides of life's coin—the uncomfortable, messy, difficult pieces alongside the beautiful, expansive, extraordinary ones. Because maybe the point isn't to choose between grotesque and gorgeous. Maybe it's learning how to hold both. Always remember: you're a star. Go shine your light. ✨