You are Invited: Fostering Social and Civic Health in your city, one invite at a time

Tony Bacigalupo

Even before the pandemic, an epidemic of loneliness has been robbing millions of their health and happiness. Fortunately, the cures are readily available—if you know where to look. Follow along to learn how to foster belonging in yourself and others! -- 👋 Hey there! I'm Tony. I'm on a mission to show people the best and easiest ways each of us can cure the world's epidemic of loneliness. Follow my journey to learn about the resources I'm creating: http://tonybacigalupo.com http://twitter.com/tonybgoode

  1. 06/10/2025

    The Make New Friends at a Bookshop Meetup, volunteer trash pickups, and more from our trip to London

    ⏱️ Timestamps: 2:16 - Event: Make New Friends at a Bookshop3:17 - How it works: divide by shelf/genre5:58 - Finding your local spot/community hub7:01 - Reproducing this in London, using locals + research8:20 - Example: The Yurt Cafe in London9:00 - Yurt Cafe as a hub for local info9:38 - Wife joined knitting club10:40 - Trash pickup discussion, Wombles inspired12:27 - Importance of branding for reproducible ideas13:05 - Comparing to Jelly (coworking brand)14:37 - Designing programs to be branded, remixable15:07 - Personal experience: trash pickup creates sense of ownership18:40 - Norwalk equivalent: Eco Evolution22:45 - Importance of supporting local businesses23:20 - They have low threshold for success25:30 - Consistency of showing up matters26:50 - Membership structures for cafes28:00 - Example: Norwalk Art Space membership31:00 - Simple activities: dinner parties, cafes, board games32:00 - Reversing disconnection, repairing social fabric32:50 - Another space in London: a community garden34:20 - Calthorpe Community Garden38:10 - Community gardens as opportunities, leverage infrastructure39:00 - Community gardens as "gardens for community"39:50 - Using what we've got vs. ambitious projects41:10 - Other existing infrastructure: Churches as hubs42:20 - Other existing infrastructure: Delis, shops in suburbs43:00 - Potential for community groups to take over retail spaces44:15 - Front yard vs. backyard culture45:00 - Propagating front yard culture: visible, approachable46:10 - Dream: neighbors coordinating front yard activities46:50 - Using outdoors in springtime47:15 - Applying to apartments: shared areas (pool)48:00 - Deliberately spending time in front yard--📻 Join us Wednesdays at 5:00pm ET: https://wfutradio.com📼 Video stream:https://youtube.com/@belongfulness/streams🎧 Podcast:https://pod.link/1534202027#YAI-S01-E03

    The Make New Friends at a Bookshop Meetup, volunteer trash pickups, and more from our trip to London
  2. 06/03/2025

    From High School Bands to Hybrid Work with Christina Bacigalupo and Rob Pratt

    ⏱️ Timestamps: 1:20 - Introducing guests: Christina Bacigalupo & Rob Pratt2:20 - Christina: television background2:35 - Welcoming Rob Pratt3:24 - Story: San Francisco "stoop community"5:10 - WhatsApp group, pancake events, neighborhood association5:45 - Case study: simple, visible, consistent, inviting10:04 - Carbs as a social binder11:10 - Story: Ohio family brunch tradition11:45 - Started with family, expanded to friends12:08 - Shared spreadsheet for contributions12:40 - Table runner as a "running guest book"13:26 - Discussion: work/life balance, pressure to be "on"14:05 - Difficulty stopping work from home15:50 - Employer dynamic makes boundaries hard16:05 - Late emails, feeling obligated16:38 - Importance of leadership by example17:44 - Hustle culture spreading20:57 - Prioritizing rest before social interaction21:36 - The Nap Ministry, "Rest is Resistance"22:27 - Why companies favor physical presence: measuring productivity25:18 - Commute time impact26:10 - Reasonable hybrid models are competitive27:07 - Changing exhaustion: socially tired from screens/meetings30:56 - Finding Rob Pratt online: Bluesky & Instagram @therobpratt31:19 - Rob posts Norwalk sunsets31:31 - Finding Christina Bacigalupo online: Instagram @misschris121231:56 - Host's social media: @tonybgoode32:33 - Promoting Earth Day festival, New in Town Meetup table--📻 Join us Wednesdays at 5:00pm ET: https://wfutradio.com📼 Video stream:https://youtube.com/@belongfulness/streams🎧 Podcast:https://pod.link/1534202027#YAI-S01-E02

    From High School Bands to Hybrid Work with Christina Bacigalupo and Rob Pratt
  3. 02/20/2024

    Overcoming social anxiety and opening up to new connection with Ani Castillo, author and illustrator

    Author of the wonderful books Ping and Spark, and the new book People are My Favorite Places, Ani Castillo shared her personal journey overcoming social anxiety, the role of religious communities, the power of inner dialogue, and much more.  Watch the full interview here or listen on your favorite podcast platform here. Overcoming social anxiety to build connection Social anxiety is more than just shyness; it can be a crippling condition that prevents people from forming meaningful relationships. Ani bravely shared her personal experience with severe social anxiety, noting, "I was born with social anxiety or it was given to me by experience, I don't know. But I'm one of the people on earth who had received the gift, the terrible gift, of social anxiety." She further explained how therapy helped her manage this condition: "My therapist introduced people, like almost like you have phobia of snakes or heights. They had to introduce interactions with people little by little, and they started giving me homework." The key takeaway here is to approach people as if they are already friends. This simple mental shift can have profound impacts on your comfort level and the quality of the interaction. The role of church and religious communities Ani appreciates the sense of belonging she finds in her church community. But what really stood out was her emphasis on the intergenerational nature of these communities and the built-in social rituals. She mentioned, "Churches are amazing just to bring people together." "I think churches are amazing just to bring people together and it’s funny that we have to agree to believe in Jesus or Buddha or something." The power of inner voice and self-talk The dialogue we have with ourselves often goes unnoticed but has a significant impact, especially for those dealing with mental health issues or loneliness. Ani shared her experience: "When I went to this talk, for example, first of all, I get really nervous going to a crowd. So when I tell myself on my way there, I'm brainwashing myself the whole way there because I get really nervous." And she also emphasized the power of inner dialogue: "If you tell yourself, 'Nobody likes me.' You know, when I went to this talk, for example, first of all, I get really nervous going to a crowd." Conflict resolution and the dangers of "othering" The conversation touched on the timely subject of societal tensions and conflicts, often fueled by a lack of understanding and communication.  "I feel we all want the same thing. We all want to be peaceful, healthy, and our family safe and us being safe. That’s what we can agree on." "I feel like a lot comes down to a lack of understanding that we all want the same things. And if we work together towards that, like it wouldn’t be any worse or anything." The importance of imagination and vision Imagination is not just the realm of artists and children; it’s a crucial tool for personal growth and societal change. Ani highlighted: "It's a book about living in your imagination and that's the source of change and growth and like bigger things happening for you and daring more and reaching out for more and growing more." Links https://www.instagram.com/anicastillo/ https://imaginaryfriend.ca/ Book: People Are My Favorite Places

    Overcoming social anxiety and opening up to new connection with Ani Castillo, author and illustrator
  4. 02/13/2024

    Learning how to be hopeful with Kathryn Goetzke of the Shine Hope Company

    Is hope something we need to be taught? Kathryn Goetzke, leading hope researcher and founder of The Shine Hope Company, unpacks the science behind cultivating hope and resilience in the face of adversity. In this conversation, we explore Goetzke's deeply personal journey, her research into America's hopelessness crisis, and practical strategies to design a more hopeful daily life. Watch the full interview here or listen on your favorite podcast platform here. Learned hopelessness and learned hopefulness Kathryn spoke about the concepts of hope and hopelessness, based on her professional research as well as personal experiences. Kathryn described feeling hopeless after her father's suicide as a teenager, leading to her own experiences with addiction and hopelessness. She emphasized the need to understand and teach the science behind cultivating hope, to counteract societal forces that breed hopelessness. "Hopelessness was really the single consistent predictor of suicide." Kathryn has made it her mission to develop programs that measure hope levels and teach concrete skills for boosting hope and resilience. Programs for youth We touched on the crisis of hopelessness among youth today—for example, in one study, 57% of teen girls reported persistent hopelessness. To combat this, Kathryn developed programs to instill hope competence in children, teens, and young adults. These range from short lessons for early elementary schoolers to a 10-week course on hope skills for college students. "I started with that age because anxiety and depression, historically it would go up in 11 to 12 year olds. And if you can catch it early and get someone into treatment and then get them the support they need, it's such a lower cost on society, also much better for the individual." Kathryn explained that she targets pre-teens and adolescents because that is when anxiety and depression typically start rising. Her goal is to provide research-based hope education to youth across settings like schools, extracurriculars, places of worship, and more. "I'd like to see hope education mandated in school systems." Kathryn believes hope literacy needs to become a core part of education and mental health given today's crisis levels of hopelessness. "We're working a license to college campuses across the US. So if you know a college campus that could use some hope skills, it's a course with top mental health, happiness, hope experts, really incredible, incredible experts on it." Practical tips for cultivating hope Kathryn stressed starting with small, gradual changes rather than trying to overhaul everything at once. Ideas include habit stacking, like meditating after brushing your teeth, finding accountability partners, and intentionally incorporating minor happiness boosts throughout the day. "Once you see that you can change one small little thing, you start thinking, 'Oh, I can change. If I can change that, maybe I could change this. I could change this, maybe I could change this.' And then before you know it, your whole life is different." Kathryn emphasized being proactive about self-care and positive habits precisely when feeling stressed or hopeless—the more we can build up the good, the more we can equip ourselves to envision what a better life might look like. https://theshinehopecompany.com/ https://theshinehopecompany.com/adult-hope-scale/ -- Belongfulness links: http://belongfulness.com https://twitter.com/belongfulness https://instagram.com/belongfulness https://linkedin.com/company/belongfulness https://tiktok.com/@belongfulness

    Learning how to be hopeful with Kathryn Goetzke of the Shine Hope Company

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

Even before the pandemic, an epidemic of loneliness has been robbing millions of their health and happiness. Fortunately, the cures are readily available—if you know where to look. Follow along to learn how to foster belonging in yourself and others! -- 👋 Hey there! I'm Tony. I'm on a mission to show people the best and easiest ways each of us can cure the world's epidemic of loneliness. Follow my journey to learn about the resources I'm creating: http://tonybacigalupo.com http://twitter.com/tonybgoode